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 Posted: Wed Apr 04, 2012 10:32 am
He stood in the doorway of the Infirmary tent, idly twisting his cell phone around in his gloved fingers.
I like you.
Please don't die.
Thinking about it made him flush a little, made his heart beat just a little bit faster, but he did not regret sending it. Part of it had to do with seeing Jordan and Harrison together, he supposed. He had not known that either of them was interested that way, but seeing how open he had been - they had both been - how they had both just fallen together, sort of, uncaring of who was watching or what people might say.
It was...impressive. And Gale had respected them both for it.
The other part of it was that he had held in his feelings for so long that sometimes he felt suffocated by them. He was not the type of person to let it be known what he was thinking most of the time, as Marcus knew very well when they had had their talk a few days back.
Gale did not like burdening others with his feelings. They were his to carry, after all - and he did not want to hear their sympathies or see their concerned expressions.
He was not a kid, but right now he felt like one more than ever.
His thumb brushed over the screen of the phone, looking down at his Sent Box where the text message still lay, visible for him to see and to read it again.
I like you.
Please don't die.
He closed his eyes. Somehow telling Eva his feelings made him feel strangely liberated. He knew she could not ever return his feelings - though the small, nagging, almost desperate hope that she would could not be tamped down. It was a childish thing to think, considering their age difference, and considering everything else, but it was there, regardless of how much he tried to tell himself that hoping was stupid and pointless.
He looked down at the message again.
I like you.
Please don't die.
I don't want to die either. I don't want to leave this world, and if I do, if I have to, I will go down fighting because I don't want to die without doing everything I could have done first.
His fingers smoothed over her name again, small and neat text on the screen.
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Posted: Wed Apr 04, 2012 11:12 am
Aside from the growing bruise on her side, Eva had come out of her patrol relatively unscathed. She was on her way back to the infirmary tent now, her cellphone in hand as she worked on sending off texts to a couple of her friends. Things like, "Be careful when you patrol--there are giant scorpions out there", and "go with a friend when you head out".
Her thumb never stopped moving, rapidly sliding from key to key as she typed in her message, sent it out, and then rinse and repeat. Reine, Otto, Jude, Gale--
Gale.
She suddenly froze, halting to a stop as she stared at the name on her screen. Her thoughts immediately flickered back to the contents of the text that he had sent her, her brows drawing together as her expression became uncertain. How was she going to reply...? She...was pretty sure that she already knew her answer, and that she was confident in her feelings, but it was just admitting them aloud that would be difficult.
...But she would do it. Gale had been brave enough to tell her--she would just have to work up the guts to give him her reply.
Eva began walking again, her gaze focused downwards at her cellphone as she typed out her message to the other death trainee.Quote: Want to go on a patrol together? I'm just heading back to the infirmary tent right now, but I'll accompany you if you want to do a round. It's pretty dangerous to go alone, so I'd feel bett
And she never finished her text, as--not only had she already reached the infirmary tent--but she had gone ahead and collided into someone who had been standing in the doorway. Her cellphone slipped from her fingers and landed in the sand, the screen face-up with the unsent message still visible. Eva was quick to catch herself by stumbling back a step or two, a sheepish smile already on her face when she looked up to apologize. "Oops! Sorry about tha--"
Her eyes widened. "Ah, Gale."
She looked a little uncertain, but Eva knew that the last thing she wanted was for that awkward silence to settle over them--not between her and Gale. So, after a beat of pause, she suddenly grinned and pointed towards the boy's cellphone. "Haha, I guess what they say about texting and walking being dangerous was right. Sorry about that--you okay?"
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Posted: Wed Apr 04, 2012 11:28 am
He was still looking at his message on the screen of his phone when something - or rather, someone ran into him from behind, sending him stumbling forward a few steps. There was a muffled thump as a cell phone skidded on the ground in front of him, and Gale almost dropped his own phone in the process. But he held onto it and straightened, starting to turn around, his mouth already open to offer an apology himself, but -
The words died in his throat, which suddenly felt very dry.
"...oh," said Gale, feeling extraordinarily awkward all of a sudden. His fingers tightened around the cell phone in his hand, as though he needed something to hold onto. A pale red blush spread over his cheeks, galling him, but there was nothing he could do to prevent that.
"Eva."
He hadn't exactly meant to see her so soon, not when his feelings were so unstable. He'd had plans, things he had wanted to say, and he was still sorting through them to make sure they were all in the proper order. But here she was, standing here in front of him, and everything that he had thought of slipped from his mind.
Not good.
"I'm fine, yeah, sorry," he said, glancing down at his phone before his gaze flickered back to Eva. Uncertainly he looked towards the cell phone on the ground, then stepped towards it, his fingers shaking slightly as he bent to retrieve it, needing something to do.
His name was on the screen. Gale straightened slowly, his eyes skimming over the text she had been typing out - typing out to him.
It was not a reply to his earlier declaration, though, and Gale was not certain whether to feel relieved or disappointed. Silently he held out the phone to her, his face crimson.
I can't do this.
<< Yes you can. >>
He hadn't known the dragon was even awake, but Jinhai's voice was quietly reassuring in his mind.
"Eva," said Gale, and his heartbeat was so loud he felt as though it would be audible to anyone who was standing within a ten mile radius. He pressed his lips together, but his expression was calm and serious.
"Can I talk to you about something? I have something I...want to say to you."
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Posted: Wed Apr 04, 2012 12:05 pm
Now that Eva knew about the crush, she was more than a little aware of the growing blush that was blooming over the boy's face. She was certain that her own cheeks were a little pink as she reached out to take her phone back, flashing him a grin and a quiet word of thanks. Noting that her message was still on the screen, she simply snapped the phone closed. She was sure that Gale had already seen it when he picked it up for her, after all.
Before she could extend the patrol invitation aloud, Gale spoke up first, effectively throwing the girl off guard. Her mouth was half open, frozen as she took in his request. He wanted to...talk? To...to tell her something?
O-oh. Oh boy. Okay, she could do this.
Trying to ignore the fact that her heartbeat picked up, Eva--with Chara's gentle prompting--took a deep breath and smiled, her expression having a softer and more serious edge to it than it usually did. "...Yeah. Of course, Gale. You know that I'm always willing to listen to what you have to say."
She reached out to give his arm a gentle squeeze, and then eyed the tent that they stood in front of, noting the buzz of voices that came from within. Very softly, and with a slightly wry smile, she jerked her head in the tent's direction. "Did you want to move somewhere a little ways from here, or...?"
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Posted: Wed Apr 04, 2012 12:14 pm
She knew what was coming; Gale could read it on her face, the way her expression seemed to turn more serious, the way some of the amusement had left her eyes. Her fingers were gentle on his arm as she gave him a squeeze, and Gale nodded, trying to keep his heart out of his throat so that he could speak.
They walked a short distance away, away from the Infirmary tent and between two of the quieter, unoccupied tents. Gale stood there awkwardly, twisting the ring on his finger as he tried to gather his thoughts.
Jinhai, I can't do this. I can't.
<< You've already done this, remember? >>
The rifle's words were soothing; a gentle reminder. Gale swallowed hard.
"I just want to say..." he started, then stopped. He drew a breath, closing his eyes briefly as though to mentally prepare himself, and when he spoke again it was all at once, slightly in a rush, but still clear:
"I just want to say that I'm happy to be your friend, and I'm really grateful that you let me be a friend to you in return. I've never really been all that good at talking to girls, but with you it was so easy and you were always so kind to me. You never treated me like a kid, and you respected me and made me an equal. I've never had that before, so I...I'm grateful to you...f-for that. I'm really happy that you consider me a friend."
He swallowed. Almost.
"But I...don't want to be just your friend anymore," he continued quietly, and his voice was a little hoarse, his throat feeling very dry. He felt as though his heart were going to break right out of his chest at any moment.
"I like you," said Gale, and the blush was furiously red now, staining his cheeks scarlet. "I like you...not like a friend, but as something more. You're...you're beautiful, and you're kind, and I...needed that friendship."
Almost.
"...I would say that I...l-love you, but that seems...a bit...too much," he mumbled, looking away from Eva. His hands clenched into fists at his sides, and he willed himself to keep talking, to keep saying what he needed to. "And I'm not even sure if I know what love is right now."
He looked back at her now, and his expression was quite different - it was calmer, almost bittersweet, and he gave her a small smile.
"But I have...have a feeling I know what your answer will be."
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Posted: Wed Apr 04, 2012 2:49 pm
While Eva managed to keep her outward composure calm, her inner panicking paralleled Gale's. I...I can't do this, She told herself, her thoughts growing more desperate when the boy prepared himself to speak, How am I supposed to tell him that I...
Chara silenced her with a gentle shushing noise. Just listen to what he has to say.
And so she did. Eva stood there silently, her attention focused wholeheartedly on the boy as he revealed his feelings. His words brought a tinge of pink to her face--how had she never suspected the boy's blossoming feelings?--and the blush only grew deeper as he went on. Though a feeling of embarrassment enveloped her, she made certain not to tear her gaze away from his face.
I like you. Eva's heart squeezed tightly at the words, her eyes fluttering shut for a moment when she felt the sense of panic flood her again. How was she supposed to reply to that? If those were his honest feelings, the she should reply honestly in turn, but...
"But I have...have a feeling I know what your answer will be."
Her eyes snapped back open at that, and the look she gave Gale was one of surprise before it softened. Slowly, she felt her tense shoulders relax, her gaze falling to the ground as her whisper escaped her lips.
"I...I think you do. I'm sorry, Gale."
And then she reached out, arms curling around his neck as she pulled him in for a hug. For a few seconds, she simply stood there in silence as she held him. When she finally spoke, her voice was soft, and it sounded like she may have been wearing a bittersweet smile of her own.
"I really admire you, you know," She murmured, shutting her eyes again, "You really are an incredible person. You're sweet, and level-headed, and...seeing you so calm and collected during our missions is what keeps me calm. If you weren't around, I..." She wasn't any good at expressing her feelings--not like Gale was--but she could only hope that he could sense her affection for him behind her words. He was her cherished friend.
Eva drew back, sliding her hands up so that she could cup his cheeks. Leaning in, she pressed her forehead against his. "I want to tell you something too. This mission. I'm sure it's going to be dangerous--maybe one of the most dangerous yet--but...Though her expression was soft, there was something in her eyes that usually wasn't there--a strong flash of determination. "You mean a lot to me, Gale. I'll be watching out for you, so know that...no matter what it takes, I'll make sure that you get through this alive."
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Posted: Wed Apr 04, 2012 4:13 pm
He knew what her answer would be, but that did not mean that it stung any less.
"I'm sorry, Gale."
The words made his chest ache, made his throat feel even dryer. He pressed his lips together in an attempt to keep any of the ugly, despondent feelings from pouring out, the self doubt and the childish hope he had tamped down for so long. It was not Eva's fault - he knew that at the very least.
But it still hurt. He nodded, his stiff stance relaxing a little as he fought to keep control, to stay calm and to not make her feel any less of a person, to make her feel bad for rejecting him. Somehow he had always known she would never say yes, no matter what Marcus said, so her only reaffirming this knowledge was not a surprise.
Eva reached out to him - which was a surprise - and pulled him into her arms for a hug. Gale tensed automatically, his face flaming, but after a few seconds he let himself lift his own arms, hesitantly wrapping them around her back. He closed his eyes, listening to her speak, and his heartbeat was loud in his own ears.
Hopefully she wouldn't notice the way his fingers were trembling slightly.
When she moved away, her hands lifted and he rested his forehead against hers, his eyes still closed. But he opened them again when he heard her voice, and he raised his hands, covering Eva's with his own and letting his fingers rest gently atop hers. His face was still red, and he still felt that ache, but somehow, despite everything, there was a strange sense of reassurance and calm.
"You mean...a lot to me, too," he said quietly, refraining from the everything that had almost slipped out instead, since that would have sounded melodramatic and he did not want to seem childish, especially not right at this moment. Gale leaned back away, lowering his hands but still holding Eva's, and his fingers tightened around hers. A determined expression was on his face.
"I'll protect you," he said, and there was that calm again, as though he were only stating the simple truths. "I'll make sure that you get out of here alive too. Just don't...don't die, okay?"
He leaned forward and kissed her - just on the cheek, and just a quick brush of his lips against her face before leaning back and letting her hands go finally, a bright smile on his face. Gale took a step back and linked his fingers together behind his back.
"Don't worry about me," he said cheerfully, and gave her a mock salute. "I'll be just fine."
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Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2012 1:06 pm
The smile on his face broke her heart. A part of her--the guilty part--wished that she had just said yes, but then...that wouldn't have been the right thing to do, right? While she did love Gale, her feelings for him were of the platonic kind--the kind that one felt for a cherished friend. She had never seen him anything less than a good friend--and she had hoped that he felt the same--but she had also never expected the possibility that he saw her as something more than that.
"I won't die out here. Not while I still have people to protect." She assured him with a small, crooked smile, though it faltered slightly when a thought dawned on her: now what? It made sense if both of them felt a little awkward right now, but how long would this awkwardness persist? Were they destined to become distant friends who offered only a weak, uncomfortable greeting whenever they saw each other?
Chara took that moment to tell her to calm down and take a deep breath before she let her thoughts get carried away.
While Eva was doubtful of such a thing happening them, she was still worried. Enough so that her voice sounded hopeful--and maybe a little desperate--when she suddenly spoke up. "Later..." Later, after they had some time to themselves, "Later, if we aren't moved elsewhere, do you...want to go on a patrol with me, maybe?"
Sure enough, she felt uncharacteristically shy asking. After a moment of pause, she was quick to add, "Later as in...anytime later. Hours, days..." She wasn't really sure how long they'd be staying here.
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Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2012 4:17 pm
He was not going to let Eva see what lay behind the bright smile he gave her. Not now, not ever, not even if they were on their deathbeds. To do so would break his resolve and only hurt her more, and he knew that he would never do that.
So he just smiled and let himself be happy for her.
"Don't worry about me," said Gale again, as he readied himself to walk away. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket - the arrival of a text message - but he did not answer it, not yet. It would be awkward for a while - he wished it wouldn't be, but it was inevitable - but he hoped it would pass soon and they could go back to being friends.
Friends. And that was it. He desperately wished that she would not avoid him now. Had he just ruined any chance of having her as a good friend?
He did not know if he could handle that.
He started to turn around, but Eva's voice made him stop, half twisting back to face her, his heart clambering in his chest. Gale's eyes flickered, his mouth opening and closing as if to say something, but he clamped it shut again swallowing. Something blossomed in his chest - relief, pure relief that she still wanted to be around him, even after he told her how he felt.
"I..." he said, then paused. He drew a deep breath, calming himself, and then gave Eva a gentle smile, one that seemed to be reserved only for her alone.
"...I'd like that," he finished quietly. "A lot."
There was a moment in which Gale started to leave, but stopped yet again. He hesitated at the tent, then turned to look at Eva over his shoulder.
"I'm not giving up, you know," he said, and grinned abruptly. "I mean, obviously I can't just stop how I feel about you, but maybe in a few years, when I'm older, you'll reconsider me."
He shrugged his shoulders. A small, hot breeze rifled his hair as he said, "But if not...I just want to say...that the man who gets your heart will be a very, very lucky man to have you in his life."
And with that said he gave her another smile and walked away, disappearing back into the cluster of tents.
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