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[Q] Auri the Midas Demon [READY, Crit please]

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Adomiel

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2012 12:35 pm


User Image - Blocked by "Display Image" Settings. Click to show.AMITYVILLE ACADEMY ENROLLMENT FORM

Name: Auri Ferous Pen
Nicknames: Auri
Gender: F
Age: 15
Faction: Demon
Race: Midas Demon (Same as Ravvlet's character Johnny Danger. Used with her permission.)

Natural Ability: Midas Touch - Whatever object Auri currently is touching with is turned into gold. It has to be touched by hand. It returns to its original state when contact is ended. The gold coloring is just an illusion and does not harm whatever is changed. This also causes Auri to walk with her hands behind her back, to avoid activating her ability by accident. Because she is young the touch will turn any non living thing gold, whether or not she wants to. If she is not actively trying to change something it wont spread much farther than her hand, but the handprint will linger for a second or two. When she actively changes something, it can be an entire object or even something living. Full fledged Midas demons can make the change last for years on objects to convince people it is really gold. It works best with other metals.


Personality:
“I want it, and I want it done now!”(Impatient)
Much like her father, she has no patience with people she believes are wasting her time. She picked it up watching her father’s board meetings as a child. Auri can often come across as rude, but it does have its use in the time sensitive business world. Her patience is even thinner with her brother JD, who she feels is the biggest waste of time in all of Halloween.

“Synergy” (Resourceful)
Auri finds it best to try to surround herself with the best, and let them do the work. She has excellent management skills. She was bred for success (quite literally.) With the right people working under her she thinks she can turn a profit on any venture she gets her hands in. She can usually see the best in people and will try to coerce others into helping her achieve her goal. When things go well she has little to do herself and that’s the way she prefers it.

“What’s in it for me?” (Selfish)
As expected of a Midas demon, she is always looking to turn a quick buck. This can often distract her from other responsibilities. She doesn’t normally see things from someone else’s viewpoint and can be difficult to sway in opinion. If it isn’t helping her, she has no compulsion to do it. This can also be used against her if the prize is large enough. “There are some deals you just can’t refuse.”

“I’ve got it.” (Fast Thinker)
Having been brought up in a yog-eat-yog world, she has been prepared to think on her feet. She can quickly assess a situation and come to what she thinks is the best solution. Auri can strategize and conclude her results with the speed of a broker, and will immediately try to counteract any problems that could arise. This can make her a valuable asset in both business and combat situations. “Strategy only works when applied punctually.”

Why are they enrolled in Amityville Academy?
Auri’s father is Mr. King Pen; owner of Rancid Records. The most notable artist on the label is Auri’s older half-brother Johnny Danger. While Johnny was groomed to be a rock superstar, Auri was raised as the successor to Mr. King’s business empire. As the favorite child she has easily gotten whatever she pleased from her father. As a result, she never learned what a hard day’s work was. Only after much convincing, that she wasn’t the perfect princess Mr. King saw her to be, was she sent to school. Auri was sent to Hell's Gate Academy for Demons and all ties to his account were cut. That way she could learn to manage on her own. Because of the many family connections she has abused there Mr. King is looking to transfer her to Amityville where no faculty know him personally. Hopefully she will learn how to build allies and surround herself with promising students. How else could she learn to make a profit?


FEAR Ability:
Golden Tongue: “The mind is a powerful weapon. It can move mountains... with the right words behind it.” Auri boosts the morale of her teammates by convincing them they can’t lose. By playing to their virtues she tries to inspire them to succeed. By making her allies their best, Auri need not lift a finger. (Uses The Eye mechanic.)


Physical Description:

Eye Colour: Green
Hair Colour/Style: Gold/ Flat bangs and hair that goes to her shoulders.
Skin Colour: Gold
Clothing Style/Colours: Auri wears a cross of a business woman’s clothes and a military dress uniform. Her appearance is made to reflect man’s desire for wealth and power.
Extra: Small horns on her forehead.
References: Picture over there ->

Edited: 3/23/12 11:44
PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2012 8:56 pm


I'm no good at critiquing so avoid it but felt I should at least post a comment because I really like your character and it was really fun to read about her.

Meeki

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 23, 2012 8:46 am


JD'S LITTLE SISTER? OMIGAW I LOVE IT. Not sure what to crit it all made me smile I wanna see more of her omg |B
PostPosted: Fri Mar 23, 2012 9:15 am


I am not a 'thing'.

Anyway, I LOVE THIS QUEST. Her species is really awesome, especially! Her personality also fits well together, and I don't sense any contradictions. I also like how her strengths can also be her weaknesses, especially in social settings. |D

On thing though; her natural ability. When you say objects, it means that it doesn't affect living things? Since you also said 'by accident', does that mean that she has no control over it? What about her clothing? Is there a way for her to put on a pair of gloves to neglect the effect it has on other things?

Her Fear is awesome too. |D Hehe.

Dragain

Wealthy Lover


Adomiel

PostPosted: Fri Mar 23, 2012 9:31 am


Dragain
I am not a 'thing'.

Anyway, I LOVE THIS QUEST. Her species is really awesome, especially! Her personality also fits well together, and I don't sense any contradictions. I also like how her strengths can also be her weaknesses, especially in social settings. |D

On thing though; her natural ability. When you say objects, it means that it doesn't affect living things? Since you also said 'by accident', does that mean that she has no control over it? What about her clothing? Is there a way for her to put on a pair of gloves to neglect the effect it has on other things?

Her Fear is awesome too. |D Hehe.



Because she is young the touch will turn any non living thing gold whether or not she wants to. It has to be touched by hand.

If she is not actively trying to change something it wont spread much farther than her hand, but the handprint will linger for a second or two. When she actively changes something it can be something living as well as an object. The gold coloring is just an illusion and does not harm whatever is changed.

Full fledged Midas demons can make the change last for years on objects to convince people it is really gold. It works best with other metals.

Also, thanks for the crit. I will make some changes.
PostPosted: Fri Mar 23, 2012 11:41 am


Adomiel

SOUNDS GOOD AND LEGIT TO ME!

And you're welcome!

Dragain

Wealthy Lover


Adomiel

PostPosted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 11:33 pm


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