|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 4:44 pm
Please do not post...
Chibi Senshi of the Phoenix is totally going to be adorbs XDD
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 4:46 pm
Name: Perenna Lexington
Nickname: N/A - Some might come up through RPs?
Age: 11
Birthday: March 4th
Sign: Pisces
Gemstone: Aquamarine
Blood Type: A+
Fav. Food: Takoyaki, Shrimp Balls, Beef Balls... A lot of food that come in 'balls'...
Hated Food: Anything that sticks to teeth or gets stuck in teeth ( Peanut butter, popcorn, etc.)
School: Knightside Elementary
Hobbies: - Dancing: Dancing is something Perenna does both by herself and with others. When she's with others, Perenna is in a beginner's ballet class. It is her only real 'formal' dance. Otherwise, the time she dances is when she is at home. The music that she listens to is anything that she likes the rhythm of and will just move her body to the sound of the music. Despite her like of dancing, she won't actually just watch people dance. It bores her and she would rather join them in dance than sit there. The ballet performances with her class is the only one she is willing to sit through.
- Bird-watching: On sunny days, Perenna can be found carrying cheap binoculars from her parents as well as a note-book bag, which is literally a notebook filled with 'notes' and 'drawings' of different birds Perenna has seen. This is Perenna's most frequent hobby, having her binoculars and notebook with her at all times. Even at school they'd be tucked into her backpack. Perenna won't jump out at random people to see her notes, but if someone were to ask about them, she could go on about it non-stop. When she wants to go to different places (besides her yard and the school yard) to find birds, Perenna usually drags along her mom or dad. Her parents have tried signing her up with other kids for nature hikes, but Perenna's curiosity ends up pulling her away from the group, which caused her parents as well as guide to panic. This way, with her parents, they'd only have to watch just her and not worry about her getting lost!
- Reading/Book collecting: Perenna's favorite hobby is definitely bird-watching, but thanks to books and reading, it expands her knowledge about them. She can be found spending time in her school library looking at pictures of birds. If she finds a book she likes, Perenna would end up asking her parents to buy her a book. Alongside reading about birds, Perenna enjoys reading about other things too, mainly adventure and mystery books. She enjoys how books make her think differently and bring her into other worlds.
Virtues: - Warm-hearted: Perenna is warm-hearted towards everyone. She will start off very shy with people, but almost always her heart dominates her shy personality. Her warm-hearted nature shines most when someone is sad or hurt. Other times, it's usually giving them a warm smile or sharing something with them (whether it be a snack or book!). Her desire to make the world a happier place dominates her shy nature.
- Ambitious: Perenna knows that she wants to get somewhere in life. She doesn't know exactly what it is, but will work hard to get there. She'll be willing to try any activity at least once and she will push herself to do the very best. Even if she does poorly in something at first, Perenna would ask others that are better than her for advice and try to excel her mentor! Sometimes she'll be stuck working on something for days, even weeks, until she feels like she'd doing a good enough job. For things like homework, Perenna would make sure her work is in full and detailed, wanting to pull the best grades that she can.
- Orderly: For someone quite young, Perenna doesn't like seeing things out of place. She doesn't really understand why she doesn't like it, but when things look off, she has to fix them. For example, for her book collection, she has it organized by height, then color, then thickness. At school, her notebooks, pencils, rulers and other stuff have their own places in their desk. Sometimes when it isn't her stuff it would bother Perenna still. However, she wouldn't touch someone else's stuff without asking. If they were interested, she would even teach them how she organizes. Perenna always knows where to find stuff if someone or herself needs it. If any of her friends want to keep something with her, they know that she'll put it in a safe place and be able to pull it out again.
Flaws: - Gullible: For someone that loves to learn, Perenna is very gullible. Although she fears people, it doesn't mean that she won't listen to what they say. If a stranger told her that unicorns were real, she would probably believe it without question. Even if someone told her later on that it was not true, Perenna would be horribly confused on what to believe. Her mother realized a while back that kids would make fun of her or toy with her because of this. Because people take advantage of her, she always needs a buddy or adult by her side so they can watch out for her.
- Childish: Age-wise, Perenna is already classified as a 'child'. She tries to make herself less of a child, but when she gets frustrated, she breaks down horribly. She'll throw tantrums, shut people out, cry... Perenna makes quite a scene. If she's not comfortable around the person, run off, balling. Only people that she knows well can pacify her cries. If things do not go her way, she gets upset until people give into her.
- Insecure: Although Perenna pushes herself to do many things and try to succeed in as many as she can, she's unsure of herself. Whether it be if she can succeed or if she can make friends, Perenna gets scared and questions herself. Because she is critical of herself, Perenna doubts her abilities, but because of her ambitious nature, she always tries to push herself forward. Her insecurities fuel her shyness as well; Perenna is afraid of being judged when it comes to goals she has.
PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION
Eyes: Round, bright eyes. Blue-green color (if you can do blue and green for both eyes, that would be awesome!)
Hair: Really long, blonde/orange hair; large curls at the bottom of the hair; her right bangs are tucked into loops :3 Reference Uncert
Face: Heart shaped, no freckles, small ears, light skin
Clothes: Knightside Elementary uniform :3
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 4:48 pm
Senshi: Sailor Aldebaran, Chibi Senshi of the Phoenix - Why Aldebaran: The star itself seem to fit because the star glows a red color as well as the fact that it's one of the brightest in the night sky.
Challenge: C'mon! Become a kid like me!
Fuku Colour: Main Color: Yellow/Yellow-Orange/Orange Secondary Color: Deep red
Fuku: Oh hay a colored reference! XD
Collar -- Plain, Orange in color mostly, then red trimming Bow -- Front bow is kind of like the Chinese knot (Reference - just the top part) Her brooch, a feather, will be hanging from the one piece that dangles down; her butt-bow will be part of an obi Bodice -- Plain white bodice; on top of it, will be a wrap type of skirt. One top part and one under part. The wrap can be smaller to expose more white of the bodice if needed! Sleeves -- Flowy sleeves with the upper arm part sliced open Brooch -- A single orange and yellow feather Bottoms -- Skirt, one bottom one top, top is like that described at the bodice part. Top one is Yellow with red trimming and the bottom is all orange Tiara -- A string around her forehead, red. The centerpiece is a gold circle with a crystal colored center. Maybe little wings too? (like the colored reference) Choker -- Classic choker, deep red Shoes -- Deep red, lace-up ballet flats Gloves -- N/A Accessories -- A pin for her looped hair, maybe something like this but instead of flowers, feather(s)? CC for this :3
Attacks:
Sailor Scout Attack: Aldebaran, Phoenix Flight! Aldebaran cups her hands in front of her. When she opens them, a small yellow-orange 'energy' egg is in her hands. She throws it up into the air and the egg 'pops', becoming a small energy phoenix. The phoenix then flies around people, Chaos or order, and is a small distraction. The phoenix can last for up to 15 seconds. Once the time is up, the phoenix 'bursts' into 'energy flames'. The flames do nothing but 'explode' in which may startle someone, but that's it! If someone hits the phoenix with another magical attack before time runs out, the phoenix would disappear. Can be used twice per battle.
Super Sailor Scout Attack: Aldebaran, Phoenix Twin Take-off! Again, Aldebaran cups her hands in front of her. When she opens them, this time, two small yellow-orange 'energy' eggs is in each of her hands. She throws them both up into the air and the eggs 'pop' to become energy phoenixes. The phoenixes then fly around people, Chaos or order, and is a small distraction. The phoenix can last for up to 25 seconds. Once the time is up, the phoenixes 'burst' into 'energy flames'. The flames do not burn at all; the flame explosion would just be part of the distraction. If someone hits the either phoenix with another magical attack before time runs out, both phoenixes would disappear. Can be used twice per battle.
Eternal Sailor Attack: Aldebaran, Phoenix Reflection! This time, Aldebaran clasps her hands together with her eyes closed. A yellow-orange energy-based egg forms around her. After a few seconds, the egg 'cracks' and out comes a huge energy based phoenix. The energy phoenix would then fly towards a person or group, and all order-aligned members would get a burst of energy to use for 15 seconds. This can be used once per battle.
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 4:49 pm
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 4:50 pm
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 9:06 pm
Yay! I got her stuff filled out *finally* and won her civ in the Halloween event (: Any feedback would be loved!
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Nov 09, 2012 3:41 pm
Hey, Heart! Congratulation on winning Perenna, and I'm excited you get to play her! I apologize in advance for the worldliness, so please don't let my wall of text discourage you! I'll try to say as succinct as possible, so let's get started!
Hobbies:
My major interest for hobbies is her reading hobby; it seems to focus a lot on birds, and the only thing I'd like a little clarification on is how often does she read a book that isn't about birds? I'm not totally convinced that this is a hobby on its own—it seems kind of like some extra information relating to her bird-watching hobby. For that reason, I was just wondering what other types of books she might read, or how often does she read?
While its not necessary to add, if you wanted to thicken up her profile and maybe open up a few more doors for roleplay, I had a few questions about her other two hobbies!
Dancing: Is she interested in watching others dance? Does she go to ballet or other recitals or performances?
Bird-watching: While it's fine to have reclusive hobbies (particularly because she seems to be fairly reclusive), I was wondering if she was involved in any programs or clubs that might also incorporate this hobby? Nature walks, or educational groups? Just because she is so young, I feel like this is something that might need a chaperone/supervisor if she wanted to go see some
Virtues & Flaws
Most of her virtues and flaws work together really well! The one that concerns me is reclusive, which doesn't quite seem to fit in with the majority of her virtues, so I'll make notes on that when we get to it. Everything else mostly clicks, however, so most of my commentary is going to be on clarification!
Virtues:
Warm-hearted: The first thing I notice about this is that you note that she shies away from people most of the time but 'in certain cases'; this might be something to reconsider since virtues and flaws are meant to be applicable in a wide variety of situations, and by adding stipulations into the traits, it makes it less of a trait that can be used in any situation. A quick fix to this could be to just note that she is warm hearted towards everyone—specifically those who are upset or crying. When you go on to say 'her sadness for them overcomes her shy personality,' it makes the trait sound more like empathetic, and then the last sentence kind of detracts from the positive aspects of the traits. I was getting the impression that Perenna was shy, however her desire to help others helps her overcome that trait of herself. A quick definition of the word warm-hearted is " amicable and friendly; kind, sympathetic and generous," so if she is really shy (or reclusive) I might need some more information relating to her reclusive trait for this to really work.
Ambitious: I think this is a great virtue to have! You start off really well in going into it, though a lot of this virtue starts to read as insecure to me. Instead of focusing on not knowing what she wants, or that she's afraid she won't find something to succeed to, I'd like to hear about how her ambition is an admirable quality! I'd like to hear about how she can stay dedicated to a goal, or how she is always aiming to be number one—how she overcomes the odds and how she deals with the situation when things turn against her! Perenna might not always know where she wants to be in life, but I'd like to hear more about how hard she works to get something when she wants it!
Orderly: This is a good trait to have, though I wonder how this affects her life positively? A sentence or two about how this is positive/something to look up to her for would make this trait perfect! Specifically, how does her organization and cleanliness help her in life? Do people see her as more trustworthy or responsible because of how well she keeps her belongings?
Flaws:
Gullible: This flaw reads as mostly perfect to me! The only thing I want to know a little more about is how her gullibility can lead to major issues! Is she the sort who might believe that guy really has free candy in his van? Does she need frequent supervision/correction? Does she trust everyone unwaveringly, and people are prone to take advantage, be it to gain something from her, or just to make fun of her?
Childish: The first thing I noticed was "and oddly only does it around people she knows", which I think could be an issue since this is another flaw that has specific requirements before it can come into play. For this flaw, I'd like a little more focus on the tantrums/emotional display she goes through when she is frustrated. What sorts of things can set her off? Does she get frustrated when she doesn't get her way, or if she can't do something (maybe to coincide with her ambition virtue, when she is trying her hardest but just can't do something?)?
Reclusive: This flaw seems to contrast with a number of her other traits, and I think it might make it really hard to get Perenna into some roleplays if she is so reclusive that she is always trying to withdraw into her safe zone. If this is pivotal to her character, I think her other traits might need some tweaking to reflect on how her reclusive nature affects the rest of her personality, however my suggestion is to swap this flaw for another. Insecure immediately comes to mind, given the fact that it seems heavily hinted at in her ambitious virtue—and being insecure could still lead to reclusive moments.
Senshi:
Fuku: I think the fuku you have referenced should work for a chibi! The only thing that I feel might need a little tweaking is the amount of white on the bodice [maybe just shrink the size of her wrap type skirt so that you can see more of it; otherwise, I think she's got the rest of the necessary pieces!]
Attacks: Her first two attacks look pretty good to me! The only thing I have to note about them is the 'flames' at the end of her attack; I think, while these might not do any actual damage, they might just be a little flashy. 'Bursting into energy flames' makes it sound like it might do some damage, and if the attacks are primarily to be a distraction, I don't think they need to have any physical affect—even for warmth. I think if they just 'hatch' from the little energy eggs she throws up and then disappear after the time limit and then flicker into flames before dissipating, that works fine—just as long as there's no physical effect.
For her eternal attack, I'm not totally sure this reflects a phoenix sphere and I think it is really limiting. For her to only use when she is desperate makes the attack a little too specific; I think she should be able to use it whenever she likes! However, I feel like as the attack now it is too specific (ie, 'everyone pauses and reflects about something in their life'). Because her sphere is the phoenix, I feel like she could do something to deal with rejuvenation (even though she is a chibi, maybe her eternal attack could be used to heal small injuries or restore some energy to herself or allies?). Or, you could stick with making it an upgrade from her first two attacks (maybe her super attack with an extra use and maybe three phoenixes to distract instead of two?)
I think that concludes it! I know I've left a wall of text, so I hope that isn't discouraging! Please feel free to quote me if you have any questions or make any changes, and I'll be back here as soon as I can!
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2012 10:40 pm
Thanks for your detailed crit, bby! I think I addressed all the questions you asked as well as made changes... So please tell me how it reads now 8D! <3
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Nov 17, 2012 11:40 pm
She looks good to me, thank you for the clarification!
I'm gonna drop this off for you and a GM will be in for the final verdict!
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Nov 26, 2012 7:35 am
Her powers seem appropriate for a chibi, so you're good to go. ACCEPTED
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|