[PRP] What now? (Achal/Ban'ma)

[Painted Moose]

The sun's cherish rays did nothing to lift Ban'ma's apprehensive mood. She rolled onto her back outside of the den, their den, and pushed her hind paws against the exterior. Her clear eyes rolled up the clouded sky with a depressive sigh. What was she going to do? It hadn't been that long ago that her Pad had come back to the pride, and she still couldn't be around him for very long. It was just...awkward. At first, she had been devastated by Tsubame's lose, and tried to stay strong for her family. Then he left. She still couldn't get over it. A part of her resented Achal for what he had done, but the other accepted it. If that was how he wanted to grieve, far be it from her to stop him.

Ban'ma laid her head back on her boa while she fiddled with her paws. Namir had taken care of the others and herself while he was away, and as lonely as it had been, she'd found ways to cope. Now that he was back she felt as jittery as she had when she'd first joined the pride. Her nerves were fried. Should she be mad? Upset? Sad? Loving? Happy? She was too scared to tell him anything; too scared he would resent her for it.

If there was one thing Ban'ma was not it was secretive, and keeping her feelings inside was killing her. However, she was determined to keep up her calm facade and mother the cubs that had returned with him; after all, what else could she really do?

 

[Kaori_luv]

Achal was still grieving truth be told. He thought he was doing a fair job of hiding it. He couldn't wander the rogue lands forever mourning the lose of his love, he had duties to his family and his pride and his cubs deserved to know their family. He promised them that they were free to go back into the rogue lands when they were old enough to hunt for themselves and they seemed content enough to enjoy the pride.

He was coming back from patrolling to take a short nap at in the den before he gathered the cubs from the watering hole, which he was sure would be a task, as drinking, bathing and playing freely was more a new experience for the group. When he reached the den he was greeted by the sight of Ban'ma lying in the sun and he smiled.

"That is a very odd way to take a nap Ban'ma dear, something bothering you this morning?" His voice was a calm and as loving as it always was for even if she lost Tsu he still loved Ban'ma and Maua dearly.  

[Painted Moose]

Despite herself, Ban'ma smiled upon her Pad's arrival. She couldn't help it; as heavy as her heart, he would always be the shining light that woke her in the morning, and nothing would change that. What had he been doing all day, though? She had to wonder. Meetings with old friends? Patrolling? Sleeping? It bothered her that she had to wonder about it, when so short a time ago she had been able to guess on the dot.

"Why did you leave? I mean, with the cubs?" Blunt as ever, Ban'ma merely looked up at him with a curious expression. She had to know. Her paws rested against the creamy fur on her chest. "I could understand if it was just you, but I..." Her brows furrowed and she sighed. The whole situation had aged her in ways she didn't care to think about.  

[Kaori_luv]

Achal frowned at the question. It was a heavy question and at first he wasn't really sure how to respond. So he simply looked up to the sky for a moment and then it hit him and he knew. He knew exactly how to explain it to Ban'ma. Whether she would except his explanation remained to be seen, but the story would explain it rather well. Why even though he need time to mourn Tsu why he took the cubs with him.

He looked to Ban'ma his eyes sad, "Have I ever told you about my mother and my twin sister?"  

[Painted Moose]

Ban'ma rolled her head to the side, shifting the boa beneath her neck so that she could see him in better light. She felt guilty for stealing the smile from his face, but at least she was beginning to get somewhere. "No, you haven't." The lioness stated simply, albeit quietly. A curiosity stirred in her gut that almost had her rolling over and asking questions like a cub, but she stilled. This was his story; his time.

Still, she did stretch out against the ground before turning around, laying on her stomach long enough to pull herself up into a sit with the boa at her feet.  

[Kaori_luv]

Achal nodded and looked up to the sky, "well I was born in the rogue lands to a beautiful lioness who resembled the sun setting sky, somewhat like Lili. My father I am told resembled Cairo except blue and brown. When you mixed them together you got myself and my twin sister. We looked exactly the same, except the mane differences. She raised us and taught us about the stars and life and it was just the three of us for a while. She had another little in my adolescence, three girls, but she died shortly after they were weaned leaving me and my sister took look after them."

He sighed pausing, as the memories ran across his mind while they poured from his mouth. He did not often tell this tale, but when he did he always felt saddened.  

[Painted Moose]

Ban'ma's questions died on her tongue as she listened to his tale. It was something she had never heard before; this story from his past. Already she could tell that it was private; all the more reason for her to stay attentive. In her mind she pictured a lovely lioness, a flitting father and two little twins that grew up much too fast. She felt for his mother. It must have been hard to leave her children, both old and new, even if she didn't want to. To know that they were alone...it would have killed Ban'ma.

"...What happened to them?" She questioned, making sure to give him enough of a break. "Your sisters?"  

[Kaori_luv]

Achal sighed, "My sister and I talked over what to do after my mother's death and she wanted to give me our sister's to an adult who she felt would be able to raise them right, but I thought we should raise them ourselves. My sister did not want the responsibility so she ran off and I never saw her again. I raised my sisters and a little serval kitten I found on my own and I love them so much, they meant the world to me. I didn't leave them until they decided it was time for them to branch out on there own."

"I was so disappointed in my sister that I knew that I would never be able to do what she did and just leave them. Even if they would have been with you and Maua, even though I knew I needed time I just couldn't leave them."  

[Painted Moose]

By the time he had finished speaking Ban'ma had taken her spot at his side. She leaned into him, giving him as much comfort as she felt that she needed in return. She was silent for a long time, content in the silence until she piped up in a quiet voice, "...You're not alone anymore. Back then...it was just you and your sister. I'm sorry that she left, but this time...this time you had us. You have a family to share your grief, and carry your sorrows." Ban'ma took a deep breath and turned to look at him.

"I can't pretend to understand how you felt; I won't degrade it by trying. I just want you to know that I'm here for you, and even if I don't understand it, I respect your decision. It's what you felt was right, and there's nothing wrong with that. I'm just glad you came home."  

[Kaori_luv]

Achal smiled at Ban'ma and nuzzled her, "I know that I have you and our family. I wasn't really thinking quite properly. I am glad to know that I have you by my side. You are so strong and you have remained so through my absence."

Achal looked up to the sky and grinned, "I love you. You know that right. I felt like it was my fault what happened to Tsu. I don't want that to happen again."

He sighed thinking on how horrible it would be to loose Ban'ma or Maua. He did not wish for that to happen especially not because they wanted to bring more cubs into the world. Something that was suppose to be such a wonderful occassion.

"I am worried for the two of you, for my daughters," she said looking away. Alone in the rogue he hadn't really realized how scared her was so much as he did now, sitting with Ban'ma.  

[Painted Moose]

If it were possible, Ban'ma would have purred. Touch was such a central part of her world, and to have him back, nuzzling her...it just put all the pieces back into place. "I've had alot of help. The girls, Maua, Namir, his banu...I wasn't alone, not like you were. Out of the two of us, you're the strong one."

She nibbled on his shoulder before turning her own eyes to the sky. "I've always known." Even if it had been foggy, her heart had never wavered. "And I love you, too. What happened to Tsubame was an accident, and it wasn't your fault. Nobody wants it to happen again, but it won't do us any good to worry about it."

She waited, then smiled a soft smile, and turnedher gaze to a patch of clouds in the sky. "It's okay to be scared. Birth...it's a scary time, and sometimes things go wrong. It hurts for everyone, but you have to remember that love brings us there. Love puts us in that situation, and through love, you'll come out of it; no matter what happens." Her earring fell against her ear as she sat back. "I'm sure I'm not making sense, but...if you let fear take over, then you're not really living, you know?"  

[Kaori_luv]

Achal chuckled lightly, "We are both strong and we will continue you to be as such, but Ban'ma my love I think you may be more wise than I."

He smiled listening to her words and knowing that was she said was true, understanding her perfectly and knowing she would be the one to really help him though this time. With her he would be able to get his harem and order and better look to the future.

"You make perfect sense and I understand. Love is really a powerful thing and I am very happy to have so much of it." He leaned against her lightly, yawning. He felt like a nap at the moment, to just relax and enjoy the company of Ban'ma. "I like your new fur," he mumbled with a lightly chuckle.  

[Painted Moose]

She swatted at his leg playfully, giving a little chuckle. Wise or not, she was just Ban'ma. Whatever insight she'd gained was thanks to the pride that he'd brought her into, after all. Besides, she'd learned alot from Tsubame, and if her newly found wisdom brought a smile in Achal...well, that was alright with her.

"Do you really?" Ban'ma turned slightly so she could fluff it up, and knock away some of the dust. "Maybe you should rest your head on it. You've had a big day, and you have to be tired."  

[Kaori_luv]

Achal nodded and lay his head down on the fluffed up boa ready to have a nice long nap. He just wanted to lie with Ban'am for a while and he didn't doubt he'd wake to a few cubs cuddled up with them.

He sighed contently. It was good to be back home and to have life continue in its happy rhythm. 'Enjoy you time with the stars Tsu,' he thought to himself as he drifted off.

~Fin