Welcome to Gaia! ::

A lot of people think that sex permanently stretches the v****a out, that women who have more sex have looser vaginas, and that sex will be painful the first time because the v****a isn't stretched yet. But those are just myths.

Sex does not usually permanently stretch the v****a. The v****a is designed to stretch a bit then snap back into place, kind of like elastic. Passing a baby through your v****a may permanently stretch your v****a out (kind of like someone trying to squeeze into elastic pants that are too small for them), but a p***s usually will not. And even the stretching from a baby is usually not a big deal, although it is enough that women who use DivaCups or diaphragms may need to use a different size after giving birth vaginally.

The reason that so many people think the v****a stretches once a girl has sex for the first time is that many girls are nervous their first time. When they're nervous, they tense up and can't get properly lubricated. That means insertion may be difficult or painful. And the friction will make the girl feel tight. After the first time, many girls relax. They're not as tense, and they're able to produce more lubrication. That makes insertion a lot easier and makes the girl feel less tight to her partner.

So a woman can feel loose or tight at any time in her life and she can experience pain or have no pain at any time in her life, no matter what her experience level is. A woman can feel tight and have pain one day, loose with no pain the next, then tight with pain again the next. It depends on how relaxed she is, how in the mood she is, and how lubricated she is.

So your problem probably doesn't have anything to do with virginity. Your v****a is probably the same now as it was before you started having sex. Dryness is the most common cause of pain during sex, but that's usually the worst during insertion. If you're feeling pain when he goes deep, it sounds more like he might be hitting your cervix. That's not uncommon, and it can be painful. Many women find that some positions are better or worse than others when it comes to the guy hitting their cervix, so you can experiment with different positions to see if you notice a difference. You should also mention it to your doctor just to be safe and to make sure everything looks ok.