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 Posted: Tue Jan 31, 2012 7:24 pm
 
Indilwen found herself out gathering yet again. She knew it made her rather reclusive and difficult to approach. And she was sure that she had been told many times that she needed to be more social. Yet no matter what she was told or how many times, the mare just simply enjoyed her peace and quiet. So what if she wasn't the most popular mare in the herd? It wasn't anyone's business but hers. As long as she was happy, that was all that should matter. Of course she still valued friendship and company, but it didn't mean that she had to be nice to everyone that came around. Nor did it mean that she needed to be constantly surrounded by others. Indi simply enjoyed the quiet, it was as simple as that.
Sighing quietly to herself, the mare tried to force her mind away from such thoughts. Yes the herd frustrated her sometimes. There were so many others, and they were always asking so many questions. Especially new comers and outsiders. The elders always seemed to leave her be and she had always appreciated it. "You'd think my life was some sort of entertainment for them, the way they like to pry into it all the time." She quietly said to no one in particular.
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Posted: Tue Jan 31, 2012 7:41 pm
Yggdrasil walked around his territory, making sure everything was well and in order. Today was a mild day; a lot of members were out walking, gardening and gathering seeds, herbs and fruit. Yggdrasil spent most of his days alone; either sitting and disappearing into his own mind or patrolling the lands.
Coming up on a clearing, Yggdrasil spied Indilwen; spending time on her own as usual. A lot of the herd members found her odd; the way she spent her time alone. It didn't bother him; since he was the same. She'd been that way since the day she popped out of her basket.
Indilwen was Yggdrasil's daugher; by his heart rather than his blood. He had found her as a basket; no parents or carers in sight. He took her in, caring for her from the day she popped until now.
Standing behind her, he smiled. "It's because you're so secretive, my daughter. You're an enigma; a puzzle."
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Posted: Tue Jan 31, 2012 7:49 pm
Indilwen jumped about ten feet, startled by the voice, and managed to drop the bit of flower she had just harvested. The mare hadn't heard her father approach. He was like that though, she figured she must have inherited a good deal of her personality from him. It was odd really, how the herd respected him so much, yet they found her to be such a puzzle. Perhaps if she tried to socialize with them more they might change their mind about her. No matter, she liked herself the way she was and she wasn't about to change for anyone.
"I don't try to be secretive." She told her father somewhat defensively. "I just enjoy the quiet. I don't like to be bothered by everyone. I don't enjoy being poked at, watched, and whatever else it is that they do to others for entertainment. I simply have more important things to do." She continued on.
As the mare spoke, she recovered the flower that she had dropped. There was no sense in wasting any time. If she was here she might as well continue to gather as she spoke. It did seem to be the only thing that she was good at.
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Posted: Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:37 pm
Yggdrasil pursed his lips a little. "If it bothers you that much I could say something.." It bothered him to see Indilwen so.. stressed and upset. Daughter of his heart; he protected her physical form and her emotional one as well. She knew not that Yggdrasil wasn't her blood father. Often he wondered if he should tell her the truth. But their likeness in appearance was uncanny and so she never wondered. It was selfish of him; he was afraid if she found out she would hate him or leave. He didn't know what happened to her real parents. No one had ever come searching for her and he himself had looked for months, before and after she emerged from her basket.
Ah, that day.. He was contemplating finding a nice family and asking them to take care of her. He was young and had not raised children. Then she emerged and looked at him with those big, bright green blue eyes and his heart melted. That day she became his daughter and he her father and that was that.
Walking beside her, Yggdrasil bent and gathered flowers with her. "Is there anything else that's bothering you, Indilwen?"
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Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2012 2:29 pm
Indilwen shook her head silently as she continued to gather more of the flowers. "It doesn't bother me all that much." She told her father quietly. "It's just that some days it gets to me a little bit more than all of the others. Most of the time I can simply ignore it." The mare continued on. Sure it did bother her every now and then, especially on days like today. However, the mare really didn't want to have Yggdrasil stand up for her. She knew that he cared for her, that he loved her and wanted to protect her. Yet she knew that she had to fight her own battles. Indi would never be able to gain respect in the herd if she only ever hid behind her father. No, she needed to handle this herself.
Pausing her train of thought, the mare pondered over the rest of her father's words. Was there something else bothering her? She supposed that there might be. That there was another reason for her foul mood today. Then again, even if she asked, she wasn't entirely sure she would get an answer. Hadn't she asked before? Indilwen couldn't quite remember if she had. The mare thought that she may have, or that she would have, however she had no memory of the incident.
With a heavy sigh, she resigned herself to the question. "I suppose," She started off slowly, afraid to ask. "I guess I've been wondering about my mother." The mare continued on, gaining confidence. "You've never really mentioned much about her. What was she like? What ever happened to her? I don't know why I care so much but..." Indi let her words trail off, afraid to say any more.
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2012 6:04 am
Yggdrasil smiled at his daughter. Of course she wouldn't accept his help. She was stronger than that - independant and he couldn't be more proud of her for that. He watched her carefully as she paused, wondering what it was she had on her mind. Naturally, as her father, he wanted to help but he never wanted to push her into telling him things if she didn't want to.
When she asked those questions, Yggdrasil took a seat on the ground, staring at the flowers around them. "They sure are lovely this spring, aren't they, Indi?" He thought changing the subject would work as it had when she asked this question as a foal - the only other time she had asked. But, she was older now and deserved to know the truth, in time..
"I'm curious as to why you want to know. Has someone said something to you?" No one else knew she was not his biological daughter, but some had theorised the truth and had spoken to others without gainging his confirmation or denial on the subject. If someone had told Indilwen he would have stern words with them. It was not their place.
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Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2012 12:14 pm
Indilwen couldn't help but smile as his father briefly tried to change the subject. Yes, she did find it a little annoying, however she knew the question wasn't an easy one for him. "No." She shook her head in response. "No one has mentioned her to me. I guess that is part of the problem. No one seems to have known her. What happened to her? Did she die long ago? Did she leave you? What happened to her? You've never mentioned her, never talked about her and no one knows her. I know it's a little bit silly for me to want to know about her now, but, she's my mother. Don't I have a right to know?" The mare looked at her father then. Really looked at him.
In the past, Indilwen had avoided the topic. She had simply accepted that she did not have a mother and assumed that bringing the topic up to her father would only pain him. However, she wasn't a foal anymore and whatever had happened to her mother or between her mother and father should have had enough to heal by now. Even if it pained her father to bring her up to him, Indi needed to know. Lately she had found herself wondering about her more and more. It would only eat at her if she didn't find out the truth now.
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Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2012 6:16 am
Yggdrasil mentally prepared himself. The time had come. She was old enough to know the truth and she deserved as much from him, regardless of the consequences. He was afraid, however, that she would be angry at him. That she'd feel betrayed and would hate him as a result. Or worse; leave him never to return.
He sucked in a breath and looked at her, face a mixture of emotions. "I did not know your mother," he began, slowly. He paused for a good few seconds before continuing. "I found you as a basket and though I searched for months and months, I could not find your parents." He pulled his eyes away from her, not wanting to see her reactions. "I am sure your mother was lovely, for she created someone so lovely as you and while I didn't have a part in your creation, you are still my daughter and nothing will ever change that fact."
Yggdrasil's eyes stayed on the grass, counting the blades; counting the seconds it would take for her to react; for her to tell him she hated him and never want to see him again. Counting how long it took for his whole world to come crashing down around him.
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 8:45 pm
The mare stood in silence while her father talked. Taking in every word that he spoke, memorizing every line on his face while he said it. She could hear the words, she could see him speaking them, yet for some reason they didn't have meaning. She couldn't comprehend them, didn't understand what he was telling her. Confused, she stood in silence for a few minutes, trying to make sense of his words. As they started to sink in, as they formed meaning, the mare could the air around her begin to thin out. It was as if her whole world was caving in around her, sucking in on itself, about to turn into nothingness, making it so that she couldn't breath.
Focusing on her lungs, Indilwen forced air through them. In and out, in and out. Normal. See? She could still breathe, nothing had changed, she simply had more information than she had had before. That was all. But no. Everything had changed hadn't it? It wasn't as simple as that. Her father had lied to her. No, he wasn't even that was he? Lies, it was all lies. What could she trust anymore? What else had he lied to her about? How could she stay? Where would she go? Indilwen turned to her father then, not allowing the tears that were building up in her eyes to show. "You lied to me?" She barely whispered it, choking on the words as they forced through her throat. "Why did you never tell me? A little louder now, but still only above a whisper. Indilwen held back the tears, afraid that if she started to cry, that she might drown herself in then. Afraid to speak more than a whisper, afraid that she might lose control of herself and say things that perhaps she might not mean.
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Posted: Fri Mar 30, 2012 9:23 pm
Yggdrasil watched as she took in the words, his heart aching. He was certain her reaction was going to be the one he had always feared. She was going to hate him. Going to leave him and what right did he have to stop her? None. If she wanted to leave he wouldn't stop her. He couldn't, not when he had anything to say that would change her mind.
"For selfish reasons. I thought you would hate me. I thought you would leave me."
Looking up, he searched her face for something, anything that would give an indication as to what her next move would be. But he found nothing. She hid herself from him and he knew the damage had been done.
"Please forgive me."
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Posted: Fri Mar 30, 2012 9:36 pm
Indilwen tried to calm herself, she tried to remember that this was her father, no matter what circumstances. However, it was a battle that she was losing. Reason and her heart conflicted. She wanted to run to him, to say that she understood, that she forgave him, but she couldn't. How could he hide something like this from her? How could she ever forgive him? She felt betrayed and hurt. Her world was spinning around her. Here she had always thought that her mother was dead, that she would never know or see her. Yet, what if there was a family out there waiting for her? A real mother and father who thought that she was dead and gone, a basket that they would never know. A daughter that they would never love and watch grow?
"I just..." She started, then trailed off as her voice cracked. "I just, I don't think that I can." She choked on her words as she spoke them. How could she say such things to him? To her own father? No, he wasn't really her father now was he? What should she do? The mare wondered to herself. Should she leave the herd? Did she try to go on living like nothing had happened? What would she think of him now? Would it be like living with a stranger that she felt she had never known? Indilwen didn't know, she couldn't find the answers.
"I... I'm sorry." She stumbled over the words as she hurried to speak them. "I- I need to go. I can't stay." She was crying now, afraid of what she was about to do. Indilwen took one last look at her father, then she spun on her heels and ran.
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Posted: Sun Apr 29, 2012 6:29 am
Yggdrasil listened to her words and knew what was coming before it even happened. So when she turned and ran, he did not try to stop her. He stayed on the ground, beaten and broken. All in the span of a few moments his world had come crumbling down and he had nothing.
It took him a few minutes to feel the tears falling down his face. Hours to move from the spot. Days to speak anything. Weeks to return to where it all happened. In all that time, he never felt anything. He had become a shell of a man. His daughter had left and with her she took his heart and everything that came with it.
It was hard to go on, but he did in hopes that she would return and patch up the pieces; return to fill the empty space she had left. He never stopped hoping. It was the only thing he had now.CheshireKttty Tag! Though it's probably finished now LOL.
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