Welcome to Gaia! ::

It was another beautiful day in Phonyland; rainbows beamed from cloud to cloud, the sun smiled down, and multicolored birds chirped songs in unison. Taquita was on her way home from the store, and her bag was filled with the things that TACO had sent her out for. Why he sent his un-hip daughter to go get glitter, mascara, lipstick, and hair spray, was a mystery. The phony running the store had given her a strange look; after all, Taquita didn't really look like the type of foal who knew what any of those things were.

She walked down the street with her head down and her eyes fixed on the ground. It was embarrassing enough to be related to TACO, let alone to be his errand girl. Despite the wonderful, happy feelings flying around Phonyland, Taquita was miserable as usual.

Taquita didn't see it coming. She wasn't the most observant Phony. So when she opened her eyes, she saw a pink-haired foal in a heap next to her. A long with that were things that looked like they began their lives as cookies, but were burnt beyond recognition. Which was a shame, because the cookies still fell under the "5 second rule".

Also on the ground were the contents of Taquita's package. Her eyes grew wide with horror, and she shrieked as she scrambled to gather everything up before anyone noticed. One of the glitter bottles had burst open though, and she was covered in the shiny pestilence. Frantically, she began to roll around on the ground to try to get it off.

Somehow, this was less embarrassing to her than being seen with a bag of beauty products.

Oh. That other Phony was still here. Taquita stopped rolling, and stood up and did her best to look like a dignified adult, and not like a panicked foal. She wasn't entirely convinced it was working.

"Stop that," she sternly said, "you're making our entire age group look bad."

She stuffed a tube of lipstick, and the bottle of hairspray in the bag. The mascara flew somewhere unknown, and the glitter was lost forever. Taquita would have preferred that the glitter had been lost someplace else other than on her though. The phrase "worst day ever" came to mind, but Taquita was still convinced that the worst day for her was the day she was born. She had to admit that this one ranked up in the top ten though.

"Cake tree? Don't be ridiculous. There are no such things as cake trees, and they would not be 'super mega-awesome' if they were real. Do you even know the logistics that would have to go into designing a cake tree? There are so many flavor, frosting, and topping combinations that it would be impossible to please everyone. There is not enough unicorn magic in all of Phonyland to make such a ridiculous idea work." Taquita frowned and started searching for the mascara tube. It had to be here somewhere. Her dad was going to be upset enough as it was. Maybe this would teach him to not go to the store himself.

She sighed, "Although I have to admit that I am partial to cupcakes. In a fantasy land, I could see a cupcake bush being real. That seems more plausible. Cupcakes are closer in size to a fruit than a whole cake is."

Cakes growing like pumpkins? That was actually very clever. Maybe this foal was brighter than she thought. Even though she liked to think she was an adult, Taquita still was not grown-up enough to realize that judging everyone without giving them a chance was actually really really bad.

Finally, she introduced herself, "My name is Taquita, and it's always a pleasure to meet another baked good enthusiast. Although, you said you don't know how to bake..." She trailed off and bit her lip. What Taquita was thinking was, 'that's really obvious by how horrible those cookies look,' but maybe she was learning how to be polite, which was a a pleasant change.

"I seem to have lost my father's masca--- um, magic wand. It's a small, black tube. Do you see it anywhere?"

The look of shock that appeared on Taquita's face was one for the record books. She giggled awkwardly and put one hoof behind her head to scratch it. "Oh yay... you found it so quickly," she squeaked out.

Well, crap. Now she had to make up whatever magic that tube of mascara did. Taquita could have just told her that it "magically made your eyes look pretty," but she had no idea how to do that without putting an eye out.

She decided to go with a half-truth instead. "I'm sure it's undoubtedly something very seriously amazing, but my father hasn't shown me how it works yet. I was just supposed to deliver it to him. Maybe if we put our heads together, we can figure out what it's magic power is. Try pulling it's cap off to see what it looks like."

Taquita continued to spin her yarn. "Maybe it is like Arthur Pendragon's sword in the stone; only someone who is worthy can open the magic cap and become queen. You and I must not be good enough for the magic to show it's favor on us. It's a shame really." She shrugged and opened her saddle bag, "Here, I'll take it back now and deliver it to my father. He's an expert on these things."

Since the mascara was new, it was still factory sealed shut. TACO would have to open it with something sharp once Taquita delivered it to him. She wasn't sure why anyone trusted her father with anything sharper than kindergarten safety scissors; it just seemed like an accident waiting to happen.

Taquita did not like being literally pushed around by the other filly. She growled and one eye seemed to twitch and spasm in frustration. Her problem wasn't going away. It was following her home.

"Fine," she spat out, clearly losing her mask of calm. She didn't say anything more on the way back to her house. Her head was low, and she stalked angerly while Sugar Delight bounced around and was a ball of annoying sunshine. This day was retched.

Stopping at her front door, Taquita hesitated. She hated anyone meeting her family; she'd done a good job of keeping her Best Friend Ender away from TACO. He was about as smart as a box of rock. Singular. Multiple rocks in the box would have been brighter than him. It was embarrassing.

Going inside, the living room was painted bright, neon pink; it helped the leopard print furniture to stand out. Not that it needed the help, really. It was ugly and horrible all by itself. TACO was passed out on one of said leopard print couches, and had his cape draped over him like a blanket.

Taquita waked up to him, and her voice escalated from a whisper to a shout as she tried to wake him, "Father? Father? DAD! WAKE UP!" He sat up quickly, and his first instinct was to feel his hair to make sure it was still solid and in place. Spoiler: it was. His hair never moved. Ever.

Without giving him time to recover, Taquita handed him the tube of mascara. "I brought a friend home. She wants to see how to use this," she quipped. Better get this humiliation over with.