word count: 2126

“This Charles boy you’re living with-

“His name is Chase, dad.”

“How come I’ve never met him?” Mr. Rae continued on as though Vanessa had not interrupted him. They stood in her kitchen, surrounded by grocery bags. John Jr was stretched out on his stomach in the living room, chin in his hands, watching Gohan kick Cell’s scaly a**. A bag of ketchup chips lay open on the floor beside him. Every once in awhile, when he reached inside, the plastic would crinkle. He never took his dark eyes off the TV screen.

“Probably for the same reason I never see him,” there was a trace of a giggle on Vanessa’s voice. She smirked at her father, amused by his suspicion, and passed him a head of lettuce to put in the fridge. “He’s never home.”

“Why not?” Mr. Rae did not share in his daughter’s humor, and regarded her coolly.

“He works harder than I do,” Vanessa, stacking several packages of instant pudding carefully into a pantry cupboard, shrugged.

This wasn’t exactly a lie. The truth was that Vanessa didn’t know, precisely, what kept Chase away from the apartment so often. He said that he worked a lot. She had no reason to disbelieve him and, while she couldn’t help worrying whenever it started getting unreasonably late and he still hadn’t come home, sometimes it was just really nice to have the place to herself.

Especially when Kam came over. Thoughts of him brought a heat to her cheeks. Vanessa, suddenly embarrassed, turned away from her father and started rearranging cans of soup so that her favourite ones were at the front.

“Hmmmm,” Mr. Rae sounded unconvinced. He stuffed a box of frozen waffles into the freezer, and scratched the back of his head. “How do you like working at the diner?”’

“It’s okay,” came her pensive answer, “I miss Big Willy.”

“He misses you too, kiddo.” Mr. Rae paused in his chore to stare at his daughter. There was a fond light in his eyes, and a hint of something else in his smile. Something sadder. “We all do.”

Vanessa bit her lip. Her hand wavered over the handle on the pantry door for a moment, and then closed around it.

It had not been easy, deciding to leave the little apartment where she’d spent most of the latter half of her life. The rooms were small. The lights often flickered. In some places the paint flaked off the walls, but everything she held dear lived and breathed and slept inside their structured embrace. It had never mattered that the building around them often broke, or crumbled, or smelled because they were always together-- as whole as they could be, without her mother.

Vanessa cleared her throat, “I know, dad,” and closed the pantry door. It eased shut on generously oiled hinges.

In the end, the choice had not truly been hers to make.

Mr. Rae asked too many questions. Sailor Vulcan did not fit into his world. Vanessa might have been a young woman, out of high school, but she would forever be his little girl. Perhaps, if they’d lived in a safer city and Mr. Rae could sleep peacefully at night knowing that his beloved daughter would return to him with her soul intact, he would have given her more room to breathe.

9:00 o’clock curfews did not an effective hero make.

When she’d embraced Sailor Vulcan’s mantle and assumed the Senshi lifestyle Vanessa had not been prepared for the havoc it would wreak on her family life. As Super Van she’d been able to make all the calls. Celebrating John Jr’s birthday and visiting Grandpa on the farm were easy, when you only had your father to answer to.

The Blood Moon Court had changed all of that.

Training and meetings. Kidnapping and torture. Blood and sweat. Death and war.

Ares had left little room for life.

It had taken some time, but eventually Vanessa realized that Sailor Vulcan could not be a part of Mr. Rae’s family.

The pieces just refused to fit together.

So she had compromised, by finding herself a roommate and a place where she could exist outside the anxiety of her overprotective father. Vanessa had discovered flexibility and freedom in her independence. These were things that she was not willing to sacrifice.

Mr. Rae and John Jr. were welcome to visit for dinner, and she would stay with them for Christmas, but the three of them would probably never live under the same roof again.

Vanessa didn’t like to think about it. She avoided Mr. Rae’s gaze, and started collecting the empty grocery bags.

It was a long time before either of them spoke.

Mr. Rae hesitated. Vanessa, watching him discreetly out of the corner of her eye, tensed when he opened his mouth. “Sweetheart. Why don’t you come ho-

“Dad,” Vanessa cut him off quickly, and shook off the hand he placed on her shoulder. There was a hint of a warning on her voice. “We’ve already talked about this. I told you I’m not coming home.”

John Jr curled his salty fingers around the TV remote, and turned up the volume.

“Vanessa Alicia,” Mr. Rae, mindful of his son across the room, tried to keep his voice low by hissing under his breath. His chest swelled with an emotion that he could not suppress. “I’m not going to argue about this anymore. Go pack your things.”

“No.”

Standing up to him was hard for her. Vanessa was stiff as a board where she stood beside Mr. Rae, staring stubbornly at a spot of something on the stove. It was orange.

Pizza sauce.

It reminded her of Kam. Vanessa summoned her courage, held her head high, and looked Mr. Rae defiantly in the eye. “I like it here.”

“Vanessa, please, you’re not listening to me. ” Mr. Rae, who would not be cowed by his daughter, glowered right back. His voice trembled with concern for her. “I don’t like thinking about you being here all by yourself! What keeps Chad away all of the time? Where does he work? Is he a drug dealer?”

“His name is Chase,” Vanessa groaned, bright eyes flashing, “and I don’t think he does drugs, dad!”

She took a deep breath, and bulldozed forward before Mr. Rae had a chance to interrupt, “Besides, I’m not always by myself!”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Mr. Rae was suddenly wary. He narrowed his eyes at his daughter, and crossed his arms over his chest. He sounded like he wasn’t sure he wanted to know the answer.

“It means that Kam left this morning.”

The silence that passed between them then was deafening. It overpowered the sounds of the television. John Jr, whose cheeks were unusually pale, turned the volume up again. Gohan roared.

A vein pulsed visibly in Mr. Rae’s clenched jaw. His expression was easy to read. He was fuming, and struggled to comprehend the things his daughter had just implied.

Vanessa’s heart pounded. Her insides twisted with guilt so painful that she almost apologized.

But she held her ground, and persevered against her father’s furious temper.

“Kam’s a man?”

“Kam’s a man.”

Mr. Rae tore his gaze away from Vanessa then, gripped the edge of the kitchen counter, and braced himself there. He closed his eyes, and swore softly under his breath. There was a defeated look about him that broke Vanessa’s heart.

She knew. She knew that she’d won this fight. At last.

And it didn’t feel as good as she’d imagined it would.

When Mr. Rae spoke, his voice was a whisper, “does he treat you right?”

“Yes,” Vanessa didn’t hesitate. “He makes me happy.”

Silence, again.

Vanessa stared at her father, who stared helplessly at his hands, and had no choice but to accept the things that his daughter was telling him.

She was all grown up. Living on her own. Supporting herself. Spending time with men.

It hurt him.

“Well,” Mr. Rae’s voice trembled a little, when he straightened up. For the most part, however, he maintained his composure, and even offered Vanessa a smile. It didn’t quite meet his eyes, and was a little bit broken, but otherwise sincere. “Good.”

“Dad,” Vanessa whispered, and wrapped her arms around him. Mr. Rae was so tall that the top of her head barely brushed his chin. “I love you. You know that, right?”

Mr. Rae took a deep breath, and then returned his daughter’s hug. “I know, honey. It’s just hard. I worry about you so much, and the house is so quiet without you. I can’t remember the last time I heard the smoke alarm.”

Vanessa leaned back so that she could look at him. The scowl on her face transformed at once into a smile when she saw the twitch at the corner of Mr. Rae’s lips.

“Ha ha,” she rolled her eyes, laughing truly despite herself, and pulled slowly away from his embrace, “You’re so funny.”

“Thanks. I try.”

“Hey you guys!” John Jr called. He’d moved from the floor to the sofa, and waved the remote at them from where he sat. His cheeks were no longer pale, and there was a smile on his face. “Who wants to be a Millionaire?!”

Mr. Rae and Vanessa exchanged knowing glances. Smiles started on both of their lips.

“I DO!” Vanessa shouted, heart lighter than it had been in a long time, and raced into the room with a sudden burst of energy. She claimed the seat beside her little brother, and half-squashed him in the process.

“Oh geezus,” John Jr groaned, and pushed Vanessa away from him, “get off of me. You weigh a ton.”

“JOHN JR,” Vanessa pretended not to shout him, and raised her voice so that she was shouting. But there was no trace of ire in her tone. She shifted on the sofa, and sat on him more completely; pressing the side of his face into the cushions with her back. “JOHN JR WHERE ARE YOU?”

Underneath her, the little boy burst into a fit of giggles, and pushed back with his hands. He managed to lift her a little. Vanessa’s eyes widened with astonishment, because she couldn’t remember him being that strong before, and threw her arms over her head. All the better to smother him with.

“JOHN JR, I CAN’T HEAR YOU. THERE’S TOO MUCH FAT.”

“Vaneeessaaaaa,” John Jr wheezed, and laughed, and wheezed some more, “I can’t breeeeathe.”

Mr. Rae stood in the kitchen by the stove, watching his children wrestle. The smile on his face painted a bittersweet portrait. John Jr was only ten years old, but tall for his age, and getting stronger everyday. It wouldn’t be very long before he, too, was ready to leave the nest and mark himself as an individual within the world.

They were good kids.

His heart swelled at once with pride and sorrow.

“Okay, you two,” Mr. Rae drawled lazily, and crossed the space from the kitchen to the living room. He sagged onto the sofa, and squashed his daughter the same way she squashed her brother. As a big man, he was very conscious of his weight, and careful not to hurt them. “Make room for your old man.”

“DAAAAAAAD!” His children wailed in protest: laughing and giggling and wheezing in turn. “NOOOOO! GET OOOOOFF!”

The smile that played along their father’s face then was joyful.

There were things about Vanessa’s lifestyle that unsettled him, and so many questions with answers that didn’t add up. He was plagued constantly by anxiety over the things that she might get up to and, while he wouldn’t have traded her for the world, always wished that she would practice a little more caution.

Destiny City was a dangerous place. People went missing left and right.

Not for the first time, he thought about taking all three of them away. Someplace where they could turn on the News without holding their breath, because there wouldn’t be some miserable report about a monster attack downtown.

John Jr wouldn’t have a choice. If Mr. Rae decided to relocate, the little boy would have to go with.

Vanessa was different.

In the depths of his bones, Mr. Rae knew that she would never leave Destiny City. Something bound her to the metropolis, such that she was reluctant even to visit her grandfather.

It upset Mr. Rae, who sat up when the theme song for Millionaire sounded over the speakers, and took up some of the empty space at the end of the couch. His children exhaled with relief, exaggerating their suffering with loud groans, and settled in to watch the show.

Vanessa smiled and hugged John Jr so tight that he pinched her.