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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 9:49 pm
My boyfriend is in town over the weekend to check out a school he's interested in. The school put him up in a very nice hotel for the weekend. We hung out for a while, but he has to wake up early tomorrow. I was really, really tired (I had trouble getting up on my own) and I asked him if I could just spend the night with him. He refused to let me stay. I'm really offended and he's acting like nothing is wrong. Am I overreacting?
Just to clear this up before anyone asks... 1. We've been together for a long time (years, in fact). 2. We're both adults. 3. We've had sex. 4. We've spend the night together before several times.
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 10:23 pm
I think you are in the right. You aren't over-reacting at all unless he has a reason for refusing you.
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Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2006 1:18 am
Honestly, it's six to one, half dozen to the other. If he has to get up early, then it's reasonable for him to want to sleep alone. Also, it's reasonable for you to want to spend the night. Hence, you can either let this issue go, or you can needlessly fight it and get each other worked up. Your call.
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Posted: Sun Feb 19, 2006 10:19 pm
Good points have been made by both the previous posters. For these are facts that have been pointed out.
1) He needs to wake up early. 2) You are both adults.
Yes, it is true that the two of you may have slept together before, not to mention spent the night with one another.
To say you are overreacting would be a bit harsh. There is nothing wrong with you being a little worried, concerned, or even a bit upset or disappointed with the turn out of this.
However, before assuming something is wrong. See what happens, and try to be supportive of his wishes as well as of him and see how things go tomorrow. Also if you find that you are still bothered by this, talk to him about it. Let him know how you feel, and speak with him about any insecurities you may have.
As adults the best thing you two can do is communicate your frustrations, insecurities, etc. After all, communication is vital.
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 2:12 pm
Well maybe a little, but I think that you have a right to feel the way you do. It may just be because he needs to get up early, doesn't want to be tired for the tour thing at the school. He's probably nervous as well, and felt like some alone time. Or it could be something else. If it means that much to you that he rejected that you stay....ask him about it. It's all you can do...
~Fashion_Flaw
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Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2006 9:18 am
HELL NO ARE you over reacting!
if yall have been together for years, you should have a tighter relationship then that. I mean..cmon....if you juuuust wanted to sleep. whats the big deal? he should be used to you enough to be able to just sleep...possibly sleep better.
I would have been livid...absolutly livid lol.
I personally, would have been like...Excuse me? what the hell? yea know?
i mean..yall have slept together,had sex, and youve been together for years. yea...your pretty much on the plataue of being engaged type relationship(even if ur not ready for that, being together that long does it to yas)
So yea..hell no you have every right to be pissed. id have smacked him and tried to walk out. AND my man knows if i try to walk out, he better come after me or its gunna get about 50 times worse. lol
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Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2006 7:39 am
well I know how you feel, I often overreact like that. I think what's going on is that he's just really concerned about school. They put him in this nice hotel and everything so in case they come and then they see you there with him it might make him look bad, and he doesn't want to look bad for these schools. I don't think it has anything to do with you, so you don't have to be offended. Right now his mind is just on the schools that he wants to get into.
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Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2006 9:19 pm
Well, all I can really say is what others have said.
1) I do think you are over reacting just a bit, not completely though. I can understand the hurt feelings when someone you love pushes you away for seemingly no good reason at the time.
2) You did say he had to wake up early. Maybe he wasnted total uninterupted sleep? My mom and step-dad have been married for 8 years now and my mom and step-dad still sometimes sleep apart in seperate rooms. Not becuase they fought or becuase either one snores too loud or is sick or is a bed hog. Just simply becuase they want total uninterupted sleep.
3) Talk to the guy and tell him how you feel about this. Communication is the key to practically everything in life, especially relationships. You may feel put off anf suspicious, while he may feel nothing about it one way or the other. You have to remember that there are vast difference in the way men and woman think and act, even if you have been together fo ryears and you fele you know each other very well.
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Posted: Fri Mar 17, 2006 3:28 pm
nononononono u aren't. he should b perfectly fine w/ it. but ask him if he has certian reasons why. it may be something you may have not thought of. don't just flake it off
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