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Aokakesu Tsukinode

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Exiled Time Lord

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 26, 2011 4:36 pm


Name: (last, first) Aokakesu Tsukinode

Nickname(s)/Alias(es): N/A
Race: Shinigami
Rank: Squad 5, unranked
Gender: Male
Age: Looks about 20 years old, but is actually around 90.

Physical Description: Tsukinode has rather messy metallic blue hair which is slicked back to reach his shoulders, but is regularly obscured by a dusty black fedora atop his head. He has piercing ice blue eyes, and sometimes wears brown, thin rimmed, rectangular glasses. He has an air of austerity about him due to his perfect upright posture, and his height of 6' 3". Tsukinode weighs 162 lbs, and as a result is very slender. He has pale white skin and teeth. Tsukinode's nose is rather small and slender, taking up little space on his face. Tsukinode has no tattoos, but has a scar above his right eye, reaching to the side of his face. Tsukinode's shinigami uniform is basically a regular black shihakusho with a white sash around the waist which carries his zanpakuto.

Personality: Tsukinode is a quiet person, who is usually somewhat antisocial. He doesn't have many friends, but he is very loyal to those who he does have. Tsukinode despises lies, and having seen all of the dishonesty that he has, doesn't find it very easy to trust anybody at face value. Trust from him is exceedingly rare, even towards his friends, but it is not impossible to come by. The best thing that most people could hope for from Tsukinode is respect. Tsukinode prefers to just sit around during his free time, and either read a book or play a musical instrument. Another thing that Tsukinode enjoys are strategy games, such as chess, or Go. In addition to all of this, Tsukinode has an appalling sense of direction, easily getting himself lost. However, due to his antisocial and untrusting nature, Tsukinode is never eager to ask other people for directions.

In combat, Tsukinode's personality doesn't change very much. He is more willing to work with other people, but still keeps quite a few things hidden from them. He normally figures out necessary information by himself, not relying on other people to gather the intel.


Zanpakutou:

Zanpakutou Spirit: Tsukinode's zanpakuto is usually the polar opposite of him in personality; she is very able to trust people, and is a very deceptive and manipulating person. Despite these differences, Tsukinode and his zanpakuto can get along for the most part. The spirit appears to be a Yuki-Onna, with warm grey eyes, white hair and white clothing. Tsukinode's zanpakuto emits a radiant white light from all over her person.


Inner World: Tsukinode's inner world is a normal, ordinary town with moderate sized buildings, some being a bit taller than the rest. The only thing that is out of sorts about this world is that in the center, on a flattened hilltop, lays an extravagantly large, flamboyantly lit castle. The sky is always unlit by the sun, and a large, icy blue full moon is present in the sky over the castle. The sky is most always clear of any clouds to obscure the moon from sight. However, around the edges of the town, there are large masses of dark clouds, reminiscent of an oncoming storm, brewed by distrust.


Sealed Form: The sealed form of Tsukinode's zanpakuto is an ordinary katana with a silver, circular tsuba with two holes in it around the tsuka in a figure eight pattern. The tsuka is laced with a dark, royal blue ribbon up until the kashiri. The katana's blade is a total of 4' 5" long, 3" wide, and 1 cm thick.

(Not obtained yet) Shikai Name/Release Phrase: Take all that you want, Meigetsu (中秋の名月 Harvest Moon)

Shikai Description: Tsukinode twirls his zanpakuto around in a circle, and a flash of silver light appears for a split second, then clears. When the light dissipates, Tsukinode is now holding a scythe with a long, black handle and a multitude of points near the blade, which is long and gleaming silver with a deadly looking hooked curve. There is also a point in the middle of the blade as well.

Shikai Powers: Overall, the shikai grants Tsukinode higher spiritual pressure as well as a higher ability to control it, in a manner such as stronger kido, or faster flash step, etc.
1.) Saigetsu (栽月 Planting Moon) By stabbing the scythe into the ground, Tsukinode can implant his spiritual pressure within the battlefield for up to thirty feet away. This can be used in a number of ways.
2.) Baragetsu (ローゼ月 Rose Moon) The spiritual pressure implanted in the ground by Saigetsu transforms into a large rosebud surrounded by several thorny vines. The vines lash out at Tsukinode's foe, and the thorns sap away the spiritual pressure of whomever they pierce. The drained spiritual pressure is channeled into the rose bud, which blooms as soon as it obtains enough spiritual pressure. When the rose blooms, it ascends into the sky, where it fires a cero-like blast of the absorbed spiritual pressure at whoever contributed the most spiritual pressure towards its growth. The draining process will take a total of ten lashes to completely charge up for the attack. After firing the blast, the rose will wilt and die, and the petals will blow away, carried on the wind.
3.) Kigetsu (ツリー月 Tree Moon) The spiritual pressure planted into the ground by Saigetsu begin to grow into three or four large pine trees, each around ten feet tall, which grow all around Tsukinode and launch fifty deadly razor-sharp needles from each tree at Tsukinode's opponents, aiming at them based on their spiritual pressure. The growth process will take a couple of minutes until completion, and Tsukinode must remain entirely still.
4.) Kusagetsu (草月 Grass Moon) The spiritual pressure planted within the ground by Saigetsu sprouts immediately after the technique is activated. The spiritual pressure turns into grass and vines which coil around any source of spiritual pressure on the ground, indiscriminately. The people bound are unable to maneuver properly and basically rendered immobile.

(Not obtained yet) Bankai Name: End their lives, Aoiro Meigetsu (ブルー中秋の名月 Blue Harvest Moon).

Bankai Description: As soon as Tsukinode enters bankai, there is a silver vortex, and when the vortex clears, the scythe now has a double ended blade, which protrudes from both sides of the handle on one end of the handle, which grows much longer than in shikai, but not so long that Tsukinode could not actually control the weapon. The blade is a blue, crescent moon shaped blade. There is also a silvery blue full moon present in the sky overhead. The main benefit gained from the bankai is the fact that the Saigetsu technique is skipped altogether, and the techniques are now a lot more powerful.

Bankai Powers:
1.) As previously mentioned, in bankai, the Saigetsu step that was necessary in shikai is now unnecessary.
2.) Chigetsu (血月 Blood Moon) The blade of the scythe turns blood red by storing spiritual pressure, then releases the stored power in a burst of energy similar to the one created by Baragetsu in shikai. However, since Tsukinode gains more spiritual power in bankai, the blast is more compressed, being pressed into a crescent moon shape, and is consequently more powerful.
3.) Shinigetsu (死月 Death Moon) With a swing of his scythe, Tsukinode creates fifty black scythes which are made from the shadow of the original. These new scythes fly in the direction that Tsukinode swings his scythe in, and explode into blue lunar flames when they impact upon something.
4.) Kakuteigetsu: Saishu Gesso (目ざめ月:最終の月の相 Awakening Moon: Final Phase) Tsukinode throws his scythe into the air to utilize this, which is undeniably his ultimate technique. The scythe is absorbed by the moon, which radiates a white light down upon Tsukinode before disappearing. Tsukinode receives a new scythe made of royal blue spiritual pressure. Tsukinode can now either swing the scythe to release a wave of moonlight energy at the opponent, unleashing every ounce of the power in one strike, which would overwhelm most people. The power can either be released in a wave or in a direct attack. This attack is Tsukinode's final attack, which consumes all of his bankai's power to use. After using this technique, Tsukinode goes back to shikai.

Special Accessories: Tsukinode almost always wears a black fedora which he got from a friend before he became a shinigami. It is a rather dirty hat, which signifies just how long Tsukinode has had it. He got it from his friend, who Tsukinode was betrayed by soon afterwards. The main reason Tsukinode carries the hat around is to serve as a reminder why he doesn't trust anyone, as well as what his goals are as a shinigami.

Skills/Abilities: Tsukinode has always been proficient in Kido. In his class at the Shino Academy, his Kido outclassed all of his classmates' Kido. He is also skilled in zanjutsu, having been trained in the subject at a young age.

Kidou:

Bakudou:

1. Restrain (Sai)
4. Crawling Rope (Hainawa)
8. Repulse (Seki)
9. Strike (Geki)
9. Disintegrating Circle (Hourin)

Hadou:

1. Thrust (Shou)
4. White Lightning (Byakurai)
11. Bound Lightning (Tsuzuri Raiden)

Biography/History: Tsukinode was entered into the 64th District of the Rukongai after his death, which was an unfortunate death that followed his birth. His mother was attacked by a hollow, and Tsukinode was the sole survivor, due to the doctor's quick thinking and actions. However, the hollow wasn't satisfied, and killed the remainder of Tsukinode's family as well, including Tsukinode himself. The only thing that Tsukinode received during his brief period of time in the world of the living was his name: Aokakesu Tsukinode.

Tsukinode did not go directly to Soul Society, however. Due to his lifespan having been so brief, Tsukinode's soul was not prepared to pass on just yet, it seemed. Tsukinode was forced to wander around the city where he was born for a period of 21 years. During that time he was extremely lucky, since he didn't encounter any Hollows. However, Tsukinode did not find anyone else to talk with, and as a result, he spent the 21 years in which he wandered his birthplace alone, in total solitude.

Then, at the start of his 22nd year of aimless wandering, Tsukinode encountered his first Hollow. He ran, but to no avail, as the Hollow effortlessly caught up with Tsukinode, and was upon him in a matter of seconds. Fortunately, before Tsukinode was eaten, a shinigami appeared, slew the hollow with a single slice across the head, and then performed a konso on Tsukinode. After his konso, Tsukinode was granted entrance to the 64th district of the Rukongai, soon discovering how hungry he was after the 21 years. He soon met a girl, whose name was Uragiri Hotaru. Hotaru had the same level of power that Tsukinode had, and the two immediately became friends. Back at this point, Tsukinode was more willing to trust other people, and Hotaru was one of the people whom Tsukinode trusted completely. One day, Hotaru gave Tsukinode a fedora. Tsukinode wore it every day since. Together, Hotaru and Tsukinode would steal any food that they needed. They would share the blame for their misdemeanors. However, one day, Hotaru abandoned Tsukinode after they had taken a lot of food, taking every last scrap of the food for herself, leaving Tsukinode for dead. After this incident, Tsukinode was almost killed, having been abandoned in an old rundown area with nobody around. But, just as Tsukinode lay dying, a shinigami came and found him. The shinigami gave him food and helped Tsukinode recover. After having been saved by the second time by the shinigami, Tsukinode wanted to become one himself to repay his debt that he believed that he owed the seireitei. Another reason that Tsukinode decided to become a shinigami was that he didn't want to fall victim to people such as Hotaru ever again. Tsukinode wears the hat that Hotaru gave him as a reminder why he wants to become stronger.

Tsukinode's time at the Shino Academy was rather easy for him, as he graduated in four years. Having no real rivals or friends was sort of disappointing, but Tsukinode didn't care a great deal about. He didn't really trust the teachers or the other figures of authority in the academy, but he listened to them, retaining the main points of information. Tsukinode excelled especially at Kido, but didn't do very badly at zanjutsu either. Hakuda, however, was Tsukinode's real Achilles heel. Despite all of his shortcomings at Hakuda, Tsukinode graduated with relative ease.

Powers:
- Hado #1-11
- Bakudo #1-11
PostPosted: Sat Nov 26, 2011 5:58 pm


Okay, I don’t have too much to say on profile editing for you.

Appearance - Instead of listing, we’d like to see a paragraph or more of description. You have a lot of information, but some things like clothing, significant markings and even hair style aren’t there, nor his fedora. Try writing out the description in paragraph format, it really helps others see what your character looks like.

Personality – Is good so far, but does he act differently in battle? Think of those situations as well, and just ask as many questions as you can and use the answers as your descriptions.

Shikai – Really, it sounds good, don’t get me wrong. However, remember that you need to be careful with leaching abilities like Rose Moon. Most people don’t play them well and try to make them sap an opponent dry immediately. That doesn’t work here, and you have to remember that someone will always find a way out of it. Also, what happens once the rose fires? Does it shrivel up and die, or return to a budding state? Next, Tree Moon, considering the effectiveness of how you’ve laid out the Shikai, you need to give an actual definite size to your trees and possible length of period for them to be active. I don’t think it would be appropriate for there to be one giant forest of those trees in Shikai.

Bankai – With Death Moon, can you please give a general number of ‘shadow’ scythes that can be created and controlled with the technique please, and if they can be destroyed or disappear over time. Finally, in the final attack, I think you need to make a clarification. It seems like you were trying to say as soon as he gets his new scythe, he can unleash the stored power right then and there, or wait and release it when he’s directly attacking an opponent. The way it is described doesn’t put a lot of emphasis on how powerful the attack is supposed to be I suppose.

Beyond what I’ve already listed, you have some grammatical errors throughout the profile and they can be fixed relatively easily with grammar checkers and spell checking on programs like Microsoft Word. Also, just in general, adding more distinct descriptions to each section would be a good idea as well, especially in distances of effect on the Shikai or Bankai abilities. There needs to be some sort of scale that opponents can judge the size of the plants and other attacks.

Yokai Manekineko

Beloved Gawker


Exiled Time Lord

Unbeatable Phantom

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 27, 2011 5:06 am


I know it was a work in progress, but thanks for telling me just what was wrong with it. I realized only when I woke up today that I was missing several of the things that you mentioned here, such as the missing things in the appearance section. I honestly didn't think about the whole personality in battle part, so thanks for reminding me. I honestly should have labeled that I hadn't filled out the details completely in shikai or bankai, but in any case, I didn't. Anyhow, thanks for informing me about what is missing from my profile, and I will edit the profile at once.
PostPosted: Sun Nov 27, 2011 2:42 pm


Accepted.

Yokai Manekineko

Beloved Gawker

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