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Poetry is what gets lost in translation ~Robert Frost~ 

Tags: poetry, writting, lyrics, haiku, poem 

Reply [[POETRY]] - {{Emotional}}
He Shot Himself In The Showe

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My Name Is Porn

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 19, 2011 12:38 pm


Bout a friend who commited suicided

I want you to imagine
A young spavined boy
He was your heart and joy
Five foot ten
With a mess of blonde on his head
He was lanky with blue eyes
He loved football
And the chilly Autumn fall
He was soft-spoken; quite
But was polite with a lot to say
He did it rarely but he did it with grace
He played bass guitar
played it like a rockstar
He played fair
And worked even harder
He kept his promises and did his dares
He lived his life
With a smile on his face
This was a disguise
No one could tell he truly felt like a disgrace

He was
Your friend,
Your brother,
Your Son,
Your lover,
He brightened every room he walked into
Yet no one could see his slow descent
Or what he was going through

What was under his skin?
He cared about everyone else more
He took care of his fellow kin
Maybe he felt ignored; couldn't take it anymore
This is where the story begins
And Where the dream ends

On a morning not un-like to day
He just couldn't stand the fray
He had the idea and put it into play
He had what he needed he couldn't take it anymore
This was his last resort in a state of desperation
He could feel the reverberation in his chest
He had a revelation...
His dad had the guns in the basement
He tore through the hall way
And almost tripped on his shoelace
He fumbled to grab hold of the gun
He finally found a bullet
And loaded one, this was his punishment
He ran up the stairs
He was a desperate man in disrepair
He rushed passed his floor
Slammed open the shower door
He felt the cold barrel against his head
He was about to face his fear
He said a prayer and cried a tear
He was sorry for his burden
He shivered as he said his last words
He struggled to keep his finger on the trigger
He broke down but soon re-gained composure
He pulled the trigger
And blood scattered across the curtain...
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2011 4:20 pm


Your choice of detachment from the poem/and the character is an interesting choice. The way you wrote it almost seems like you are reporting the news of the day, but because of that it makes the poem that much deeper and sorrowful. Excellent work, but I'm sorry it has to come at such a price. My condolences to you and your friend's family.

ScarredRavens
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[[POETRY]] - {{Emotional}}

 
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