[PRP] Someday my love will- Oh! He's here! (Calder x Barth)

[MoonKitsune]

Calder hadn't seen Barth since he left the tent. No messages on the phone, no visits, and no emails. Not that it was strange for Barth. He usually didn't do anything, but after that trip, after what they shared, he thought he'd get some notice. Some indication that he wanted him over. That they would continue or maybe sort things out. And that got Calder to start worrying. Despite that Barth told him he had kissed him, liked him (that's what he said, right?), he never said they were together. That he wanted them together. For all Calder knew, it could be a conffession to rid him of guilt before they were destroyed or harmed by the hunters. Words spoken in the face of danger were really hard to figure out, and Calder was feeling worse and worse when he thought that despite the kisses he gave, and what they said, that Barth, now safe, might not want any of it. Just thinking about it made Calder wish he had kissed him more, and worry about all the things he said that he couldn't take back in case Barth didn't want him around. Was this the end of him ever seeing the demon again? What if he couldn't stand the sight of him and that's why he wasn't contacted? Did he regret kissing him? Didn't he like him?

While he was afraid and embarrassed, he knew that he had to be the one to go to Barth. It was killing him not to know. He had been so hopeful, but he remembered plenty of times - actually ALL of the time where he had put so much hope in a relationship to find out that person didn't think that way at all. And while his heart ached with the dread that he was once again making the same mistakes, but this time at a loss of one of his best friends, he rose his hand and knocked on the door.

Then he waited, throat dry and one hoof tapping the ground, unsure what to do with himself. Sometimes it sucked to be alive when you could hear your heart pounding in your ears and stinging in your chest.  

[Toshihiko Two]

Barth had been having similar thoughts, and was dealing with them by avoiding them entirely and dithering around in his room with painkillers and Christof's generator piece. The events and Calder's feelings had been clear enough, he thought. And he'd been...well, tried to be, as clear as he could- at least for him, he'd tried to make it fairly clear...

But Calder was better at these things, normally. And more...forward. So where was he?

Then again, Barth wasn't sure how seriously Calder took these sorts of things. He had been with Invictus at Prom, and he had assumed that went...alright, Barth had been a little preoccupied, at the time. Calder had been devastated to tears by...whatever brief fling he'd had at the Florestival. And then he'd gotten sick. And then...

Calder and he were friends, certainly, yes. He could remember plenty of times they'd talked or slept or relaxed. But it was easy to turn over other certain moments in his mind again and again, and those made concentrating on cracking the weaponization machine both difficult and desperately important.

He looked up from his desk at the knocking, and, for once, got up to slowly, agonizingly, walk over to answer the door personally, if only because he had a feeling- a hope, who it was, and also because he had started to lock his door and had not quite figured out a remote mechanism for it.

He opened the door. The painkillers left him feeling warm and calm and slightly buzzy. He felt a stirring of emotions past the wall of cotton. They registered as embarrassed.

"H-hello," he tried, opening the door wider.  

[MoonKitsune]

The moment the door knob started to open, he started to panic. What if Christof was in there? What if he told him Barth didn't want to see them? Would the Igor hate him too if his master didn't like him? Then he would loose BOTH friends, and those made up almost the entirely of his friendship group! Then he wondered if Barth would open it and tell him to bug off. That was even worse and just imaging it for a split second made him want to run away and pretend he was never here and be comfortable in a long distance friendship where there was no talking to confirm that everyone hated him.

Breathing deep, he held it when Barth stood in front of him. He looked tired. Well, he always looked tired, but even more so. Calder could sympathize. Taking medication, applying new bandages and ointments, not to mention he was sleeping his days away had made him feel sometimes more horrid than better. He looked drained, tired, his hands were bandaged among other things from punching mirrors, he couldn't' sit right, and he was wearing a worn, comfortable tunic shirt instead of his usual coat and dress shirt. He hadn't bothered waring a sporran. At least he could eat and be comfortable in his room - OH, no he couldn't! He had all this on his mind keeping him up!!

When Barth said 'h-hello', Calder gave a nervous twitch of a smile. "Hi" he mustered and waved. Then he saw he was waving like some idiot and dropped his hand quickly. Then the door was opened. That...that was good, right? He wasn't slamming the door on him.

That didn't make his heart race any slower. Moving in, he stepped inside and stood nearby. "I - haven't heard from you. I know you've been tired and recovering, but....I thought...that - " How did his phrase this that would ensure him having even the littlest chance of ruining yet another relationship. "..that I'd like to talk.." He looked up at the demon. "About us."  

[Toshihiko Two]

Barth leaned, so Calder could come inside, and softly shut the door again.

"No- I thought...thought so too. We, err, that is...yes," he managed finally, "I think we should. Talk, I mean. I'd like to."  

[MoonKitsune]

Talking could bring about anything, and while Calder was tender, he knew he'd have to sit down for this. It was why he was thankful that Barth's furniture was marshmallow soft and moved to the couch. Gripping the arm, the kelpie sssllloooowwwwllllyy lowered himself to sit on the couch and breathed in only a small bit faster when his bottom met cushion. It was a good thing he wore his softest, warmest, most comfortable kilt, and he settled in and breathed out. It wasn't too bad after the first sting.

As he waited, he wondered if this would be the last time he would sit on this couch. He loved this couch. He got to talk, play games, and even take naps with Barth on this couch. He affectionately patted the arm before he looked to Barth again.

"So, with all that went on, and being in cages, we really didn't get to talk about things. And I guess, I'd like to lay everything out there and...figure things out these ..." Should he say feelings? Did Barth want or have those feelings for him that he had? "....what we said to each other back there. So.." He took a breath and looked at Barth with as much bravery as he could summon in the face of utter heartbreak. " Let's pick up from where we left off. You were saying that back when when I was sick, that we kissed." He could already feel his face getting warm. "...and that I didn't dream that up."  

[Toshihiko Two]

"Yes, um," Barth started, sitting beside him. "I'd thought- you know, the next morning, you didn't remember anything about it. ...You seemed lucid enough, when we were talking during the night. I...I hadn't meant to take advantage. Or- well, at the time I'd just thought you were purposefully ignoring the entire incident so I...I wanted to apologize..."

Barth twisted his own bandaged hands.

"You said you didn't like the fellow you were engaged to, and that you wished...and I do like you. And I had the impression that you liked me-"  

[MoonKitsune]

I do like you.


I do like you.


I do like you.


I DO like you.

Calder was left staring at Barth, doing a mental rewind for several times before his anxiety melted and he gave a large inhale and exhale. Don't - Don't you be stupid, Calder. Remember THEY all said they liked you to. Remember how THAT turned out.

But reason was being pushed aside as Calder danced in his own mind, happy to take the sentence for what it fully was. Barth LIKED him. He didn't hate him. Didn't seem bothered by him. Wasn't disgusted by his like for him. HE LIKED HIM!

Before he could stop himself, he felt his uncertain smile stretch into a grin. "I like you too!" He jumped in, leaning in as he set both hands on the couch and leaned in so his face was close to the demon's. His eyes were shimmering with excitement. " I like you a lot! I thought it was a dream when I woke up, and I didn't want to ruin our friendship beacuse it just means oh-so much to me but I kept thinking and hoping that maybe I could you think of me as someone you might like-like and then I remembered you were still trying with Lilith and I'm not the person to get in-between with love because I don't like being the villian cause villians never wind up happy in the stories but it just tore me up that I couldn't say anything because I never had friends before and didn't want to risk not having you as a friend if I just told you!"

He gave a large gasp.

"But when were were in that terrible place I just wanted to keep you safe and protect you but I really made a mess of that up and then I started thinking that maybe I wasn't right for you cause what sort of stallion can't protect those he cares about and you deserve so much that I was wondering if I shouldn't really say anything at all and stop thinking about it but I kept replaying that dream kiss because it just seemed so magical and despite how bad I was at it I still wanted to find you and keep you away from those hunters even if Christof is better at that sort of thing then I am but I would have done anything to get you back home for all those reasons even if you didn't like-like or even like me." He was left looking at Barth, panting from his rapid-fire confessions.  

[Toshihiko Two]

"It's err, I think it's safe to say I like-like you."

He considered the mass number of run-on topics, and picked at the more important ones.

"And I do like Lilith. ...I thought things were going alright. We only...well, alright, we only dated briefly before. She was the first person I'd asked out, and I...let the ball drop. Mucked it up. And now I'm still stuck in a nebulous sort of trial period, have been since Christmas. I do like her. I think she's...not nice, no, but sort of-" Barth got a faraway expression on his face, intoxicating, then struggled to bring himself out of the foggy thoughts of her. Lilith wasn't really relevant to the conversation.

"It's- it's not an exclusive relationship. Like I said earlier. We're not even dating, she's dating Draven, as she likes to remind me frequently. Although she did ditch him for prom." Barth smiled once, a little too sharply, and sobered.

"I was ready. To try being...a better boilfriend. I would have...I don't know. Gone out on dates proper. Show up for things. Think of her. I did try."

He looked worn, and then guilty.

"As for protecting me... you can't feel bad about that, you almost- you almost died for me. Almost worse than died and I- I didn't do anything. Practically let it happen. You were weaker than I was by the time we got out of the cages."
 

[MoonKitsune]

While Calder has plenty to say before, he had very little to input on the matter of Barth's ex-maybe-could-be-once-she-decided-she-wanted-to-ghoulfriend Lilth. When he spoke about her, his perversion changed to one Calder never saw before, and that in itself made him jealous, bitter, and envious of the power the ghoul had on the demon. She had Barth by the heartstrings so easily and yet she wasn't bothering to show him any affection. He wondered, even now, that Barth's like-like for him was anywhere near the like-like for Lilth. And yet, he knew that even if he was second best, he'd still take that over the lonelier option.

"Yes, well, she seems lovely." He hadn't exactly met her, but she had to be special for Barth to like-like-like her so much.

He returned back to the topic when it was addressed back to him and now on and on and on about his ex-maybe-something-else. "I still wish I could have done more but, well, that mess is all over and we're all safe." They were not talking about his bad performance. He'd work on getting stronger. In being of better use.

Slowly scooting over, he looked at Barth more seriously. "I just, well, since I like you and you said you liked me, yet ...you did mention her...a lot - not that I'm going to stop you...from continuing....not the type since after all you know about my.....situation.." He glanced down at his anklet for just a second before looking back into his eyes. "...I don't know if you'd want anything more. Do you....just want to be friends or ...can we maybe be ...ya know - together?"  

[Toshihiko Two]

Barth's expression shifted. "...Do you mean- are you asking me out? Formally? In an official-sort of capacity?"  

[MoonKitsune]

Wow. That was rather direct for Barth, and Calder swallowed. The boil hadn't hinted yet that he was up for it, but here was the time and place to push the idea out there.

"Well, you said you liked me and I like you, and we ..we did kiss." More than once actually. "...and...I'd like that. I mean, NO PRESSURE but....." He rested his hands on his lap, looked at them a moment, and then shifted just a bit, before looking back at Barth.

Alright. Official then.

Calder breathed deep, took Barth's claws in his, and looked him dead in the eye. "Barth, will you do me the honor of being your boilfriend?"  

[Toshihiko Two]

The shift, after the question, was one of relief. The words can we be together, had surprised Barth.

While there was a certain appeal in being the other boil, and that situation was not exactly averted here, Barth had not been anyone's official anything except for once, and then briefly.

"Hell yes," Barth said, and then more awkwardly, "Err, yes, I mean. ...Yes, let's. I would."  

[MoonKitsune]

Calder beamed at such a energetic reaction from the boil, and gripped the claws in his hands even tighter before jumping as best he could and wrapping his arms about the boil's neck. "Oh my Jack, thank you!" He cried, ignoring the pain from moving to quickly. Instead, he eagerly nuzzled against the other boil's cheek. Clearly, he was a very happy kelpie.

Just as quickly as he had nuzzled the boil, he pulled back, arms still wrapped about his neck. "Does this mean we can go dating and hang out as a couple and Oh, can I go kiss you again when we're NOT getting chased by freaky hunters or when I'm too sick to remember?!"  

[Toshihiko Two]

"Nnn~!" Barth managed, also sore, but unwinding again at the nuzzle.

"Yes," he said fuzzily, "to all of the above. ...Especially that last one."  

[MoonKitsune]

He wasn't lying to him. Barth wasn't like Raziel who would be gone in a week because they were going separate ways. Barth wasn't like Invictus who didn't say he liked him before they wen to Prom. Barth wasn't like Cade who had met him for a day, who kissed him, and left the next day without a word. Barth was here. He wasn't going anywhere. That amount of security in knowing that Barth wasn't going to disappear on him come tomorrow overwhelmed him, and Calder's eyes glistened under the wash of happiness taking hold. That this was different, that this wasn't going to be the same before, and that he wasn't going to be an idiot by going out with Barth to only have another reminder that it was all in his said.

He was doing this right, right? He wasn't making the same mistake again, was he? He went through his checklist of bad breakups and it SEEMED like everything was okay. Was it? It just seemed a bit too good to be true. This. Having it. He had Barth's contact information, knew where he lived, and neither one of them were going to be separated in the near future. That....that hit all the marks.

So it should be safe. He wasn't going to be crushed again? He really hoped not. He REALLY REALLY hoped not. It hurt so much each and every time, and if Barth broke him, then who was he going to confine him? But No. Barth was so nice and kind to him. He liked him SO much.

Smiling, he leaned in, and kissed Barth. One he'd remember as not a dream, not a desperate act from possibly being hurt by some terrible creatures, and not before dissipating. Barth would stay here when he finished this kiss. He'd be here tomorrow. He'd be here at the end of the week. And then.....well, Calder had never gone past a week. It was.....so strange and scary and new and exciting to think about. It was all overwhelming.

He pressed in the kiss more eagerly than before, thinking over and over This isn't a dream. This isn't a dream. This isn't a dream! He was kissing someone who liked him! Not just someone. He was kissing Barth!