Azrael:
They were home. Az carried her up onto the rock where he had tended his own wound and laid her down beside the hollow in the rock. There was nothing left in it, something that made him wonder, but he said nothing. He just gave Andais' cheek a lick and left her to walk around the edges of the trees, picking leaves from various plants.
He held them carefully in his mouth as he returned to her side, not wanting to numb his tongue when he needed to talk to her so badly. Placing the leaves to the side, he moved to the water, lapped up a mouthful and spit it into the "bowl". It was gross, but he had no other way to transport the water quickly.
"After my mother died, I found Crue," he said softly, his hip pressed against Andais' fur as he started to work. He glanced at his sweetheart a couple of times, checking to see if she was okay before continuing.
"We were friends, sometimes. We had a playful rivalry. Who could steal the most, cheat, the most believable liar, things like that. We were at best bullies. We'd pick on creatures smaller than we were. I... I used to catch mice and test plants on them. Sometimes it was good. Sometimes..." He shook his head.
Andais:
She didn’t want to be separated from him when he went to find the plants. She found herself huddling in the shadows of the hollow. When he returned she released the breath she had been holding. The recent events had made her need him, made her fearful to be away from him for the most part. She sighed and snuggled into him as he spoke. She could hear his heartbeat and that was what calmed her.
Though when he started mixing the salve, she wrinkled her nose but allowed him to make it. She didn’t much mind if the water was spit from his mouth.. after all.. She loved him. That didn’t really bother her that much. She felt the stinging in her leg and she frowned with a hiss. She jerked her leg back as much as she could but it caused more pain and she let out a low growl at the pain.
Then he started speaking and she put her painful sounds aside. That wasn’t important right now. She listened intently.. Wanting him to be able to tell her anything. So he had been friends with Crue once.. That explained a lot.
“Oh Az..” She said, her voice soft as she listened.
Azrael:
His ears flicked back when she hissed and growled in pain. Just like Uriah, it had been his fault that she was like this. With an apologetic look, he dipped his paw into the water, cleaning it of the salve. When it was clean and good and wet, he began gently cleaning her wound out. He would put the salve on it afterwards.
"It lasted well, for a while. I couldn't be in his pride because I didn't have a demon, nor did I really believe in them. But I never told Crue that. When we were growing into our manes, I made friends with a vulture, Uriah. He taught me about other plants that I hadn't heard of, I learned that flowers and fruit could be just as useful as leaves. Things were getting better, I didn't have time to be such a b*****d any more... I guess it pissed Crue off." The story went on, though it pained Az to tell her. He turned to the salve and started working it onto her wound, eyes focused so that he couldn't really thing about what he was saying.
If he did, he might not be able to say it.
"I don't like storms. When I couldn't find shelter as a cub, I hated it. They didn't matter to Uriah, but he didn't like where my den was, didn't like being cooped up under ground. So when it stormed I wouldn't see him. One morning after it rained... I saw Crue sticking feathers in his mane. I asked him where he got them from... A bird he'd killed. I didn't believe... I couldn't believe he would have done what I suspected. It was a different bird, it had to have been. I asked him what bird and he gestured to a pile of feathers and gore... but... I could tell." He could still see what was left of his real friend in his mind. He doubted he would ever forget.
"I tried to kill Crue, then. I almost did. But... some sick, twisted part of me still saw him as my brother and I couldn't do it. So I ran."
Andais:
Her heart panged with pain whenever he told her his story. She felt her heart break and she could only imagine the pain he had gone through.. He hadn’t killed Uriah, but he felt like he had. He had lived with that all this time? No wonder he was so hurt..so untrusting. She leaned in, licking his cheek as it was all she could reach. Her eyes were locked on what he was doing, watching his paws work. She didn’t really know what to say, she didn’t want to break his thoughts.. She wasn’t sure if he would start telling her again if she spoke.. But she decided to anyway.
“Im sorry, Azrael. It wasn’t your fault. You couldn’t have known..” She had a softness in her voice that she only really had when speaking to Azrael. Her eyes were teary and she tried not to let them flow. She had enough to worry about. She felt the burning in her leg, but she ignored it this time in an attempt to comfort him.
Azrael:
"But I should have... Just as I should have known he'd find me here, come into my domain and..." Az closed his eyes with a growl. He could have lost her too because he was too foolish enough to think that Crue wouldn't find him, wouldn't repeat history.
"He's stupid when he wants something... I guess there's something we still have in common," he finally said after a moment, giving her a small, tender smile. He wanted her in more ways he could count. He wanted her love, her laughter, even her temper. He wanted to hold her when she was content, when she cried, when she was in pain. He wanted to see her run, to watch her lean form bunch and stretch as she chased down prey and hunt for her when she was too large with his cubs to run. He had never considered being a father until that moment. He had no delusions that he wasn't already one, it was a fair likelihood he had fathered little bastards somewhere in his past. But with Andais... He wanted to be a father.
Ah, if she wasn't injured...
"I'll never let him get near you again, sweetheart. I promise you this," he said when he finally looked up from his work, finished applying the sticky, medicinal goo. He pressed his clean paw to her cheek, the conviction of his promise in his eyes.
Andais:
She hadn’t thought of cubs really, though she had always wanted to be a mother. She was afraid that she would be horrible at it, but she still wanted to try.. She wasn’t sure about Azrael but she could wait if he wanted. She smiled up at him, and placed her paw over his on her cheek. Her eyes looked into his teal ones and she almost lost herself. She pressed her face closer into his paw and she smiled again.
“That wasn’t your fault. I was stupid, and I believed some horrendous lies. He told me you had other girls. That they had just disappeared when you were tired of them. Like I wasn’t the only one.” She said, and her eyes grew dark and stormy at the thought of him being with someone else.
She knew it wasn’t true, and she pushed her cheek deeper into his paw and closed her eyes. She took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of him. Opening her eyes she chuckled.
“I believe you.” She said simply, her e yes honest and wide as she stared into his. Her leg pain had stopped throbbing, and now she could think about the future. It almost excited her.
Azrael:
Az's ears flicked back guiltily. He didn't want to upset her, but...
"That... is partially true, sweetheart. Nothing like you, I promise," he replied, trying to find a soft way to say it. There really wasn't any way to explain without being blunt about it.
"It was only ever physical, and they did disappear once we were done. I went my way, they went theirs. It didn't happen often... But it happened, I won't lie about that." Would she understand? He'd never tried so hard as he had with Andais, he'd never brought one into his home, never even shared his name. All it had ever been was physical fulfillment in thoughtless passing.
Andais:
She didn’t know what she really expected him to answer, but she wasn’t really surprised. Had he brought them home? She looked at him with hope in her eyes, though she couldn’t hid the nervous look in her eyes. She knew that her question could bring things she never wanted to know, but she still had to know..
“Did.. Did you bring them home?” She asked, looking at her paws after dropping her gaze from his eyes. She didn’t want to look in them when she asked things like that. Her heart was pounding deep in her chest.
“I understand, I haven’t only been with one male..But..” She didn’t add she never loved them. She assumed he knew.
Azrael:
"No," Az replied with a bit of a snort. He shook his head. He didn't even learn their names. Just an itch to scratch. He pressed his forehead to Andais'.
"You're the only creature I've ever purposefully allowed here, the only one I've allowed to stay," he added, the implication that she was the only one he'd ever cared for being obvious.
It irked him a bit that other males had touched her, but she was an adult after all. And none of that really mattered, because where they had a bit of her time, he had her heart.
Andais:
When he said he had never brought them home, a smile came over her features. She had never..well..BEEN with other guys but she had entertained their ideas and she had happily flirted back with them too. She was far too much of a chicken to actually do anything with any of them though. But she didnt think he cared much about that so there was no reason to bring it up she supposed.
When he pressed his forehead to hers, she was forced to look into his beautiful eyes.
"You wont get bored of me?" She asked softly, her eyes sparkling with hope. She really did love Azrael. She wasnt sure how it had happened, it was ludacris to love him.. But she did, and she had fallen hard.
She had given him her whole heart. The scary part was hoping he'd never break it.
Azrael:
An eyebrow rose slowly.
"Bored? Sweetheart, you have made my life significantly more interesting in the little amount of time that you've been here than I ever thought you would. How could I get bored?" he asked her in amused disbelief. He smoothly slipped under her again, lifting her up. Grinning triumphantly at the look of love in her eyes, he carried her into their den and carefully laid her down on the furs, curling up close beside her.
He sighed and ran a paw over her back.
"I could kill Crue for what he did to you... I want to so much..."
Andais:
When he laid her down on the soft furs, she snuggled into them much like she did everytime she found herself on them. They were just.. comfy and she loved them. Curling up behind her, Azrael became like her warmth and he kept her from feeling alone and scared. Though her voice was soft when she spoke.
"It would cause more hate, and heartache in you. No matter how mad you are. You are not evil." She said with conviction. She couldnt see his eyes where she was positioned, but she knew her voice held the conviction her eyes held.
"Stay here with me, and we will make lots of babies and raise them here.. and we can be free from evil.." She responded. Though she hadnt realized she had used the term babies, and once it was out, she held her breath. How would he take that...?
Azrael:
While Az wanted to protest, that he wouldn't hurt because when Crue was dead he knew his beloved would be safe, he couldn't help but grin when she pressed on. She asked him to stay with her, to have a family with her and be free from the evil that Crue represented. It was a wide, cocky grin that made him sit up and move so that one paw supporting him was at her back, the other next to her belly.
"Oh, really, now? Cubs on your mind already, sweetheart?" he asked, the look on his face positively evil as he mildly teased her. She was hurt, she was hurt, she was hurt, kept running through his head, keeping him under control. Oh, but as soon as she was better, he would hold her to her offer.
"Mmmm, once we're all healed up, I'll devise plenty of ways that we can be tired and sore for much more pleasant reasons." The words were growled slightly as he rubbed his nose against her neck.
Andais:
She held her breath, and her heart was racing. She was sure he felt it even with his paw to her back. His paw traveled over her belly to support him, and she looked at it and cocked her head as if in thought. She wondered what it would be like.. for little cubs to be moving in there with Azraels paw over her belly. She smiled, and the smile grew when he seemed okay with the idea. She looked up at him, since he was itting up she could see him easily now.
"Really? Do you really want them too?" She asked. She wasnt sure if he was more excited for the act that brought cubs, or cubs themselves. But then she didnt care. She was excited for the thought of the babies, and she was excited to give in to Azrael.
"But yes, I cant imagine we would get anywhere now. With my busted up leg, and yours too." She grinned, remembering his wound from his hunting injury.
"You cant change your mind." She chuckled. "Im holding you to it." She whispered, and placed her paw over his next to her belly.
