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 Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2011 10:18 pm
Of all people she could talk to, Xiu had decided that Shun was the one who she wanted to speak to. It didn't have anything--or at least, it didn't have much--to do with the fact that she had unofficially adopted him as her "aniki". The Baku was certain that she would have gone to the reaper anyways. It was nice to be comforted and hugged, but at the same time, she felt as if she needed someone to speak to her bluntly, and...even if he didn't have any advice for her...well, at the very least, it would help her immensely just to confide in someone. The only other person who knew anything about this right now was Lattice.
Before dropping by, she had first called Shun to ask if it was alright. Her voice had lacked it's usual cheer and had sounded far more serious than usual. In all honesty, she felt guilty for imposing on the reaper like this, especially if he was still mulling over his own problems. Hopefully this wouldn't take too long.
Stopping in front of his door, Xiu gave it a few knocks before pulling her arms in to her chest, waiting for him to answer it.
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Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2011 10:42 pm
Time had gone on and Shun hadn't made a great deal of progress with his own problems. Whenever he thought he had something going, he ended up second guessing himself and wound up back to square one. He was getting nowhere, and it was frustrating him quite a bit.
When Xiu had called him, he didn't really expect much, but he did notice that she sounded different. Something was up, though he couldn't really tell what that was. Hopefully she didn't mean to tell him off like Lizzy had not that long ago.
He had his own troubles at the moment, but a break wouldn't kill him. If anything, it might save him a bit of sanity.
Opening the door when the Baku came by, he let her in silently, giving her a nod to greet her as well.
"So.. what's this about?"
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Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2011 10:59 pm
When he answered, Xiu offered him a weak smile before slipping in, immediately pulling out the desk chair and seating herself on it. She hoped he wouldn't mind, but...she didn't want to be standing while she talked about this. After stressing over this for so long, the Baku was terrified that she would just break down and release all her troubles like a breaking dam.
Fortunately for Shun, she wasn't going to become hysterical.
She didn't say anything for a while, staring down at her hands as she wrung them together anxiously. Finally, she looked up at the reaper and bit down on her bottom lip. "I...I'm sorry, I just...I know you'll probably wonder why I'm bothering you about...this kind of stuff, but I..."
Sighing, she leaned forward, burying her face in her hands. "I thought he was joking--I...I still think he might be kidding--but I just...what would you do if a close friend told you that they liked you?"
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Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2011 11:07 pm
Watching as Xiu seated herself, Shun made his way over, standing by with his hands in his pockets. During this time, he didn't say a thing, waiting for her to start. When she finally began, he was a little lost, not sure what it was she was talking about... until that last question.
That.. caught him off guard a bit.
"I don't know. Never had it happen to me," he said plainly before frowning a little deeper. Surely Xiu would have known that.. he wasn't exactly the best person to come to speak about these sorts of things, right?
"Guess it'd depend on who it was.. and how I feel about them," he shrugged.
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Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2011 12:35 am
"If it was...a friend." She sighed again, trying to voice her jumbled thoughts as eloquently as possible, "A really close friend. I mean, I...I never thought of him in...in that way, but now that he's told me..." She wasn't even sure what to think. Was he still just a friend...or had something changed now? Now that he had told her this, was she starting to see him in a different light too...or was he still "just a friend"?
No, maybe Shun wasn't the best person to ask for advice about this kind of stuff, but she knew that he'd listen without being overly judgmental about anything. That was just the vibe that she got from the reaper, and she could definitely say that she trusted him.
"I'm scared." She admitted, lifting her head and rubbing at her temples. Her eyes were actually starting to look a little glassy and...alarmingly wet. "He...he's one of my closest friends. I...I'm terrified that I'll do something to lose that." If he were really to ask her out and she said no...what would happen to their friendship? And if she agreed...
...She didn't want to lose any of her friends, and certain things lately had served as an eye-opener of that possibility. She whimpered, but...no. She didn't want to make this any more awkward for Shun than it already was (which was, gauging by the reaper's face, pretty damn awkward), so she simply pressed her lips into a thin line, hands clenching and unclenching in her lap.
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Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2011 5:26 am
For a little while, Shun was silent, unsure what to say to Xiu. It was pretty obvious that this whole ordeal she was going through was upsetting her greatly. Grimacing at the sight of her on what seemed to be the verge of breaking down, he placed a hand on her shoulder and let out a sigh.
"You're over thinking things."
Said the guy who had been spending the past weeks trying to figure out his own feelings. But... the Baku was different from him. Their situations were a bit different.
"If you don't feel the same way then you don't. There's no sense in forcing yourself just because he does."
Was it even possible to force those sorts of feelings? The Reaper had no clue.
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Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2011 8:33 am
The comforting gesture actually resulted in a lump forming in her throat. She didn't trust herself to speak yet, so Xiu remained silent as Shun gave his advice. What he said made sense, and--while it was an eye-opener--it confused her a bit as well. Was she trying to force feelings? She knew that she loved Roch...but she also loved Lizzy, Mitsu, Shun, and Levi, among others.
Friendship and romance were not the same things.
"I...I don't know how I feel." She admitted finally, rubbing roughly at her eyes with the back of her hand, "But...but no matter what happens...I'm scared that things...are going to change between Roch and I." She had never had a crush before, so the idea of herself actually dating had never occurred to her. And even if she and Roch remained friends if she said no...would things have changed between them? Would it be more awkward to talk to one another?
There she was doing the overthinking thing again. Xiu took a deep, shaky breath, looking down at her hands. Look at her freaking out about something like this! She really wasn't a very strong person, was she?
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Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2011 8:55 am
Oh. Well there was a problem. That wasn't exactly something he could give her advice with, seeing how he had that very same issue... just wrapped up slightly different.
"Welcome to my world," He grumbled while glancing away, "And well... if he said that then he meant for things to change. It just might not change the way he plans."
"Take a deep breath," Shun murmured before pausing. Wait. Roch? He didn't realize he was that close to Xiu in the first place. Furrowing his brow at this, he just tried to recall anything of the guy. The Reaper didn't know a whole lot about him really.
"Roch.." he started, "You say you think he might be joking?"
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Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2011 4:20 pm
Picking up a bit of his grumble, she glanced up at him with slightly-widened (and still very wet) eyes. Though she didn't say anything, Xiu did give a little tilt of her head. Did Shun's own troubles have to do with...? Looks like these kinds of problems were more common than she thought. She wasn't going to prod, though--on the off chance that the reaper wanted to talk about it, she would let him do so of his own accord.
Taking his advice, she took a deep, shaky breathe. It did help calm her down a little, but she was still feeling a little upset, for obvious reasons. She answered his question with a silent nod, but after a moment of thought, she quickly added, "He's...he's not a bad guy," There was a pause, and then, "Roch...h-he likes to tease a lot, though. I didn't think he was serious, but..."
What should she do? "If he were to...ask me out, should I..." If he was serious about this, then shouldn't she at least give it a go. Maybe...maybe she would end up seeing another side of Roch?
And this was really all just a joke...?
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Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2011 4:43 pm
Shun couldn't help but grimace some at the thought that all of this was caused by some poorly planned joke. Ugh people were so annoying to deal with and this was one reason why. Did Roch know that he was causing Xiu this much internal strife?
Well... sooner or later he'd have to meet up with the musician for their homework assignment. That was something definitely was not looking forward to.
"If you don't feel the same way for him then don't... not unless it was for some normal hang out type thing," he shrugged, "Don't force it. No one's going to come out happy with that."
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Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2011 7:34 pm
"Y-yes, but I...I feel like...I should give it a chance. M-maybe? ... " Shun was right. If she forced something like this, than no one was going to happy. The least she could do was give it a go though. Maybe she would be surprised by what would happen?
And in the case that she felt that they didn't click as anything but friends? It was going be hard to tell him that. She almost hoped that something would happen, just so it didn't have to come to that, but then again...
Well, she was a coward. Relationships were no exception that that rule.
"...Do...do you think he would hate me?"
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Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2011 7:40 pm
"Why would he hate you?" frowned Shun
Grimacing, he shook his head lightly.
"Just... I don't know, think about how you felt about him before he threw that at you or something. If you don't return the feelings then you don't. Both you and him are just going to have to accept that."
"Though, if he's just toying with you, then you're better off without him. He'd be one hell of a b*****d to upset you like this," he said while narrowing his eyes.
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Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2011 10:04 pm
Drooping, she wrung her hands together anxiously. It was kind of an embarrassing question to answer, but...she assumed that Roch would dislike her if things didn't work out. She really was overthinking this, wasn't she? In theory, it was such a simple concept--she either liked him or she didn't--but she was thinking far too much about what might happen.
But Shun was right. Everything he had said was right, and now...now she just had to find a way to work up the guts to actually follow through with his advice. "I...I'm not sure if I'd prefer for this to be a joke anymore," Xiu murmured, rubbing at her temples again, "Maybe...it would be easier to go back to normal if it is a joke, but at the same time, to kid around about something like this..."
Maybe she was just too sensitive. That was probably part of the problem.
"He's not a bad guy," She murmured, her voice growing weak, "I'd...I'd like to think that I can trust him not to lie to me." If he had been joking, then he would have said so earlier, right?
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Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2011 10:13 pm
Finally letting his hand drop away from Xiu's shoulder, Shun stood there and watched for a little longer.
"Either he's serious or he's messing with you. Quite frankly the former is better. Regardless of which path, something can change easily and quickly," he frowned.
"You put more trust into him than I would, but you know him better... and I'm not a very trusting type. Focus more on how you feel... then go with the flow from there."
That was what he was doing... or at least what he was trying to do. That first part on feeling was a bit of a pitfall for him. He really wasn't too concerned with how things would happen from there. The Reaper just really wanted to sort out these damn emotions so he could move on with his sanity.
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Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2011 11:53 pm
Shun didn't give himself enough credit as, in the end, Xiu knew that she had chosen the right person to talk to. As she had expected, the reaper didn't pad anything--his advice to her was clear and honest. The question about whether she would be able to follow it was still in the air, but at the very least, it gave her a great deal to think about.
After a bit of thought, she nodded firmly, looking a little more confident now. At the very least, it didn't look like she was going to cry anymore. "I trust him." Xiu said firmly, her voice soft. This was no longer just a joke anymore then (not that it ever was to her, but she would now abandon the idea that it was a joke to Roch). It was a big step in what was hopefully the right direction.
She rubbed at her eyes again, and then the corners of her lips turned upwards in a crooked smile as she looked up at Sun. Xiu could have hugged him, or said something mushy about how he was the best (unwillingly adopted) big brother ever, but she simply settled for the smile. "About this...I-I'm sorry. I didn't know what to do, who to go to..."
Not to mention she was starting to feel guilty again. Here she was blabbering away about her issues, and--to her knowledge--Shun was still trying to overcome his own problems that had been plaguing him. It was...kind of selfish of her, actually.
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