You are the apple...
It's only been thirteen and a half months, but it feels like I've known this girl for years. She's my best friend and we've never even met. Videos and pictures have been passed to each other, so I know she's 100% real and I 100% love her. We're halfway around the world from each other, but yet sometimes I feel we couldn't be any closer on the inside...
Not to get all mushy and crap, but yeah, it's an amazing feeling to love someone so much. Every moment I'm talking to her, it makes me smile. She's random, hilarious, honest, and amazing. It's not often I see her upset, as she tends to try hide those feelings so that I'm happy (slightly ironic, circular thought there), but when I do get to see that side of her, I'd do anything to make her happy again. All I ever want is to see a smile on her face, even through all the pain and tears.
Even now, just thinking about the things she's been through, the suicidal thoughts and multiple attempts, the loss of friends and family, through betrayal or otherwise, it brings tears to my eyes and a constricting feeling in my chest. Her pain is my pain, and through some masochistic need, I ask for every moment of her pain, because I want the chance to make her happy, which is, as I said before, all I want for her.
She once told me a story. It was the middle of the night and she had packed up weights and rope in a bag. She left a note to her brother on his pillow, saying goodbye. She intended to jump off a bridge near her house. Her first step out the door, her phone goes off. For reasons unbeknownst to her, she checked it. It was me. I have no clue what I said, but one look at a message from me and she stopped, sat down on her front porch, and just cried, talking to me all the while. I saved her life that night and had no clue until she told me about three months later.
Moments like these, to know that I have made such an impact on her life, it amazes me. I'm just some kid who spends way too much time on my computer, yet I've made so much difference in the life of someone half way around the world. It's almost impossible to comprehend. Yet, I'd never want to forget it.
I love her and just the thought of losing her is too much to bear. I've said it a million times before, but I'll keep saying it until my dying breath: I love you, Erica.
^This was a long winded rant and really just everything that was on my mind that I couldnt say elsewhere. There really is no point to this thread, other than for me to just express all this to someone, anyone. Say what you wish in this thread, I just wanted to get this all out of my head.
And for clarification, the relationship between her and I is not romantic, but merely the strongest and closest friendship I've ever experienced, and I love every moment.
It's only been thirteen and a half months, but it feels like I've known this girl for years. She's my best friend and we've never even met. Videos and pictures have been passed to each other, so I know she's 100% real and I 100% love her. We're halfway around the world from each other, but yet sometimes I feel we couldn't be any closer on the inside...
Not to get all mushy and crap, but yeah, it's an amazing feeling to love someone so much. Every moment I'm talking to her, it makes me smile. She's random, hilarious, honest, and amazing. It's not often I see her upset, as she tends to try hide those feelings so that I'm happy (slightly ironic, circular thought there), but when I do get to see that side of her, I'd do anything to make her happy again. All I ever want is to see a smile on her face, even through all the pain and tears.
Even now, just thinking about the things she's been through, the suicidal thoughts and multiple attempts, the loss of friends and family, through betrayal or otherwise, it brings tears to my eyes and a constricting feeling in my chest. Her pain is my pain, and through some masochistic need, I ask for every moment of her pain, because I want the chance to make her happy, which is, as I said before, all I want for her.
She once told me a story. It was the middle of the night and she had packed up weights and rope in a bag. She left a note to her brother on his pillow, saying goodbye. She intended to jump off a bridge near her house. Her first step out the door, her phone goes off. For reasons unbeknownst to her, she checked it. It was me. I have no clue what I said, but one look at a message from me and she stopped, sat down on her front porch, and just cried, talking to me all the while. I saved her life that night and had no clue until she told me about three months later.
Moments like these, to know that I have made such an impact on her life, it amazes me. I'm just some kid who spends way too much time on my computer, yet I've made so much difference in the life of someone half way around the world. It's almost impossible to comprehend. Yet, I'd never want to forget it.
I love her and just the thought of losing her is too much to bear. I've said it a million times before, but I'll keep saying it until my dying breath: I love you, Erica.
^This was a long winded rant and really just everything that was on my mind that I couldnt say elsewhere. There really is no point to this thread, other than for me to just express all this to someone, anyone. Say what you wish in this thread, I just wanted to get this all out of my head.
And for clarification, the relationship between her and I is not romantic, but merely the strongest and closest friendship I've ever experienced, and I love every moment.
and I am your core.
