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 Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2011 7:27 am
I'm in a relationship with a female named Marie. She's the love of my life and I'm so happy to be in a relationship with her.
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How this comes into play is this:
My grandmother is a homophobic, and by this I mean she throws up at homosexuality, and/or anything close to it and/or hinting to it, and screams at people about it, pastor, my grandfather isn't as bad but he stands behind her because she'll scream at him if he doesn't.
My mother is homophobic, and her husband is neutral about it.
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I am a Transsexual, none of them know about this except my Aunt because she's chill about it [Mother's husband keeps no secrets from her], and the only thought on my mind, aside from my beautiful girlfriend, is how can I tell them with out them hating me.
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Every-time I get the courage to tell I lose it because of a comment
thank god you're not a homosexual, catherine.
i'm glad you're not gay, i dunno what i'd do if you were gay.
when i don't hint, or even show that i'm against the act of homosexuality; my grandmother flips a s**t as if i'm doing drugs.
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as for myself
I do realize Transgender means I'm not homosexual [unless you go by the birth gender, [then I'm Born Female, attracted to all gender/sexuality]], but if i even slightly look male i'm called a "stupid ugly f*****t". and i have no way to deal with this.
i do realize that you, this guild, is not a psychology dump, but i'm in a rut. i have no place to turn to, and i'm pushed deeper into my depression on a daily basis because of it.
Any thoughts..?
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Posted: Sat Aug 20, 2011 8:57 am
I really did have that kind of problem when I first came out. My dad was entirely cool with it, mainly cuz he's been talking about it with my sister. My mom was in denial, which was funny cuz i thought she'd be the most accepting.
My friends and family were totally cool with it though. My grandparents dont know mainly cuz most of them are dead. ((My maternal grandpa is the only one left alive))
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Posted: Sat Aug 20, 2011 10:29 am
All my friends know, None of my family know at all.
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Posted: Sat Aug 20, 2011 2:20 pm
:/ My family is kinda like that though not as bad I think. They've all known for a while but still don't like it.
I think the best solution would be to tell them but set it up right. Do it in a way that they'll be focused on their care for you as you tell them.
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Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2011 2:28 pm
do it on Facebook, thats how I came out
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Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2011 2:35 pm
Ok.
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The "Idea" of coming out is wonderful.
But I risk losing my laptop, my bed, my home, my food. everything. Hence my skittishness. . _ .
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Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2011 2:47 pm
I don't really know. My mom is still waiting for me to grow out of being attracted to both sexes.... so I guess i didn't do a very good job of telling her. neutral
I told her 6 years ago in 2007. I'm now 22.
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Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2011 2:50 pm
This sounds like a pretty ugly situation. You have my sympathy. sad
However, I've heard many stories like this where the person's family were very against homosexuality, and the person just came out, and there was some chaos, but everything was eventually all right.
This might not happen in your situation, though. I'd say, if it was possible, that you should contact a family councilor or someone like that to help your relationship with your family to remain stable.
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Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2011 5:58 pm
You know your family better than anyone so youd have the best guess at how theyd react. It sounds to me like living at home and your girlfriend are the two most imortant things to consider. If telling them jeopardizes your living situation and you know theres no back up solution then maybe its best you hold off until you can support yourself or find a place to stay. Worst case scenario is that youll get kicked out or banned from seeing your girlfiend. It all comes down to how much your willing to risk and how important it is to you that you tell them. I've heard a lot of people in your situation wait until they arent dependant on their parents so when they tell them the hardest thing for them will be taking it all in. I know its not easy keeping a part of who you are from your family but sometimes the hardest part of the battle is picking and choosing which ones to fight. Whatever you decide i wish you luck. wink
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