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I gave my boyfriend oral sex without a condom. I realize now that it was dumb, and that I really shouldn't do that. However, is there any point of starting to use a condom when I give him oral? I mean, if he did have something, wouldn't I already have it? Not that I think he had anything, although I will get checked for STIs just in case. What are the symptoms of STIs contracted through oral sex, anyway?

Again, I did something stupid, and I realize that.

Regarding this detail Oni, he cheated on her. So he might very well not be clean anymore.

To PB, go get tested for STI's and the whole lot. Use condoms in the future if you choose, or talk to your doctor/pharmacist about getting a dental dam.

He may have cheated on me, but I'm postive they didn't do anything sexual. Why? Because the girl is uberly Christian and wants to be a nun, so even though they were romantically involved, I don't think they did anything sexual. Then again, she's a hypocritial backstabbing b***h (she did more than just steal my boyfriend, from what I hear), so her "Mary Pure" facade isn't as real as she may want people to believe.

And we are taking a break from the sexual stuff. I'm just talking about when we do go back to doing things like oral sex (which probably won't be for a while), I handle it better.

And if you all want an update, we're doing really well. I'm still on my guard, but one of his friends is doing a little spywork on them, and I've been getting a good report, so I think it's safe to say he's changed his ways.

Touching on what Kukushka said, she's right. If he had herpes, you'd never know, even if he wasn't showing sores or symptoms. How do I know? I have herpes Type 1, and I am always at risk at passing it on to my boyfriend, even if I am not showing symptoms, or even if I don't have an open sore.

As for what this girl was like ("uberly Christian"), that could be a bunch of crap, sorry to be frank. I'm Anglican, I grew up religious, and I was a "goody two-shoes" in high school. Yet several people (mainly friends) were pretty surprised when I told them I was sexually active. So don't go judging people by their reputation or how they look.

I'm glad to hear you two are doing better though. Take things slow, and don't rush to be sexually active (which you said you're already doing smile ). Work at earning each other's trust back first, and then go from there.

It probably was a load of BS. According to other kids who really know her, she's being a backstabbing, manipulative hypoctite. Plus, what "Little Saint" steals another girl's boyfriend? (I know he's to blame too, but it takes two to tango, and she's been putting the moves on him and messing with him for over a year, I'm not surpirsed he finally succumbed)

Anyway, back to the topic. Yeah, we are earning each other's trust back slowly. Wait, correction: he's earning my trust back. I even told him I wanted to take it easy on the sexual stuff, and he sounded cool with it. If he ends up dumping me because of it, that backstabbing b***h deserves him.

eek Wow, that was harsh.

Nah, he had no idea what was going on. He can be so oblivious sometimes (he is a guy, after all). I had to point it out to him! And he did offer to stop hanging out with her, but I told him he didn't have to do that, because then I'd feel like an abusive control freak.

The really sad thing here is that my best friend had something similar happen to her. She was with her boyfriend for about three years or something like that, and he cheated on her with this girl who just wanted to prove that she could get him to have sex with her.

He appoligized and they decided to go to "counciling" to figure out why he would cheat, and it's apparantly because she wasn't making him feel "good enough sexually" about himself or somesuch BS.

So, he cheats, and she gets therapy guilting her into feeling it was HER FAULT that he cheated?

>_> That made me mad, but she was away in college at Chico CA, which is over five hours from where I was, so I couldn't go beat him up.

Then, later, he cheated on her again...MULTIPLE TIMES...with the SAME GIRL!

She didn't want to take his s**t anymore and dumped his a**.

The sad thing is that ever since, she's been going around having tons of casual sex. Yeah, she's "safe" and all about it (on birth control and uses condoms every time), but I still worry about her sometimes. I guess that she was tired of being yanked around in the name of "love" and decided to become predatory to regain some of her lost sense of control of her sexuality.

I will admit, though, her stories are sure exciting!