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 Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 8:13 am
It was with a heavy heart that Amari departed Maawio's den - probably for the last time. She had not been at home but he had left a sign that he had visited, a single white flower. It lay on the ground, its petals pointed to the ceiling and it's sweet scent makign the den somewhat homely.
His paws carried him across the ground, each step cracking his heart with grief. He had ruined hislife with the decisions he had made, destroyed the relationship with the only lioness who had ever cared about him and lost the bond with his son. His heart felt cold, felt dead. He was no longer the carefree lion he had sonce been.
He'd made up his mind.
It was time to say goodbye.
Pride rock rose up ahead as he approached the place he knew Bakhti roamed, hoping to see his sister one last time before he left. He could never return to this place...the place that held so many memories - painful and happy.
He had destroyed the woman he loved and for that he would never forgive himself.
He parted his jaws and roared, a calling for his sister.
Things were changing...yes they were.
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 8:20 am
Bakhti's ears pricked up, she was with her cubs but she soon left them, they were sleeping so she had no problems with leaving them for a while. She ran quickly recognizing the roar. She made her way swiftly down to where the adult form of her brother stood. "Amari!"
A smile crossed her maw as she rushed over to him and rubbed against him. "Oh Amari!" She continued to rub against her brother before realising there was something wrong, his scent was somewhat different though why she didn't know and he didn't seem himself. She looked into her brothers eyes, "Whats wrong?"
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 8:37 am
He tried to smile at seeing her, forcing back the sheen of tears that covered his eyes. Then after a moment he felt the water within them becoming too much to bear. He dipped his face to hide them from his sister, pressing his face against the curve of neck and using her fur to dab away the moisture from his face.
"Sis. It's been a long time, I'm sorry I didn't come to see you often." His voice was a whisper, and on her were many different scents. "You smell different Bakhti."
When he was sure there were no more traces of the first shed tears he drew back to look at her, a sad smile on his face.
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 8:39 am
"I would do but we can talk about that later. What is wrong Amari?" Her blue eyes suddenly looked very serious and being the bossy femme she always had been she wasn't going to let him talk about anything but what ever it was that had upset him so much. She sat down in front of him and placed one of her paws on his own and tilted her head slightly, waiting.
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 8:46 am
His sides shuddered with a supressed whimper, his chest feeling so hollow he might just crumple inwards. "I've ruined everything sis...everything." He dug his claws into the ground, angry with himself for letting their situation get to this. "I LOVE her sis, I love her more than anything, more than my own safety, more than...more than anything." He looked down again, tears brimming in his deep, hazel eyes.
His usually cheery face mirrored only grief.
"My heart aches...I feel like I'm dying and it's my fault.." He paused, drawing in a ragged breath. "All my fault." He shook hsi head from side to side in despair. "I just want to die."
He didn't realise that what he was saying would probably make no sense....he wasn't explaining things very well.
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 8:51 am
The lioness was getting confused but guessed this must have something to do with Maawio but when he said about dieing she pushed him over and pinned him down. "Stop it and explain what happened." She was to be hoenst treating Amari like her children now. She wasn't going to let her brother leave if she could help it, she may not see him often but, this wasn't suppose to happen.
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 9:02 am
His face grew stone-cold and emotionless and anyone who knew Amari would know that something terrible had gone wrong, he was rarely seen without a smile.
"Maawio hates me, she left with my son and she'll never forgive me, not this time." His voice was cold, "if I stay here it'll drive her away from the place she loves. This is my fault and if I can put it right by leaving I will."
He swallowed the lump in his throat. "This is goodbye Bakhti, now and forever." It was no joke.
He would leave this day and never look back. He'd bring the sunshine back into Maawio's life by ridding her of his presence. It was the least he could do.
If you love them...set them free.
Set them free.
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 9:10 am
"NO!" She snarled and moved away from him. this was getting stupid, she had lost her daughter adn was now about to lose her brother. She turned her eyes suddenly cold and full of pain, "Just leave them Amari. Just leave then..." She turned from him, her body tense. This place was becoming less and less her home. Her daughter had left because of it and now her brother was dissapearing for good, what next? Mahiri leave? She just sat their snarling, the tears rolling down her face.
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 9:14 am
"Please Bakhti." His heart ached, "no more tears, you have found a home here, a good home." He nuzzled against her, "but I was not meant to find a home." He drew in a deep breath, "I was born a rogue and I see now that the lonely life was meant for me." He nodded slowly, "I'm a cruel lion, I'm not worthy of being kin to you."
He paused, one tear rolling down her nose. "I made a mistake...I flirted with a lioness...Maawio saw and now she'll never forgive me. I hurt her and I'll continue to do so if I stay here."
He nuzzled Bakhti once more, "she'll need a friend, she'll need you. Please take care of her for me, make sure she's safe...make sure that her son is safe." He made sure to say 'her' for how could he say he was a father when he hardly knew him.
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 9:18 am
"Don't bother Amari, you are just like Kib, you just leave.. not caring of what it actually does to others. Have you spoken to Maawio?" Her eyes were still cold and she refused to look at him. "If you wish to leave your family then do so. Don't forget the pain you are causing by doing so." She stood up and walked a way a little where she laid down, her head laid in her paws as she continued to cry. "You don't even wish to see your nephews and nieces..." She didn't whisper nor did she shout, he would have heard what she said as she hadn't gone that far away from him.
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 9:28 am
"Bakhti, I am dead...I am dead inside and I don't want to go on. Maawio will not talk to me, she hates me and I don't blame her. I destroyed her life...got that!?" He snarled, anger swelling within him, "I DESTROYED HER!!" A roar rolled from his throat as he paced back and forth in agitation. "I've hurt so many and I'll continue to do so whether I like it or not." He paused in his pacing and drew in a deep breath, trying to calm the storm within.
"I love you sister, I want to be a part of your family, but this is my punishment. My punishment for harming the kindest soul on this planet."
He threw back his head and roared, pouring all his anger and grief into the single sound. The ground trembled beneath him and a great tension was released from his chest. Then when it was over he stood and stared at Bakhti with the eyes of a ghost.
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 10:22 am
She didn't flinch at the roar or the yelling. "Go then Amari, for hurting one person, abandon your son and your family." She turned to him her eyes on fire. "Leave us, if you are too afriad to stay. Leave us if you don't care." She let the snarl leave her again before turning away from him. "Brothers don't leave forever Amari, unless you lied." She stretched her muscles and turned to leave, though she didn't go, she waited for a reply.
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 10:31 am
He listened to her rebuke, wincing at each sharp word. Bakhti was right but so was he.
"I'm sorry." He murmered, taking a step back. The anger was gone, replaced by grief once more as he let his eyes trace her golden form. "I hope you'll be happy here with your children. I hope you live a good and full life...I hope...I hope someday you'll forgive me for what I have to do now."
"My son thinks nothing of me and from now on he will believe that I am dead."
He drew in another deep sigh, eyes falling closed. "We can't turn back the clock. We can only learn from past mistakes...and today I learn to let go. Forget about me and continue with your life. You will live on in me as memories."
He lowered his head, "I love you my sister, I always shall...never forget that." Then with this done he turned and padded away, the pain in his heart stronger than anything he had ever felt.
"Things change...sometimes for better....sometimes for worse." If Bakhti had listened close enough she would have heard him, and as he crossed the border into rogue lands he paused to utter his roar, a farewell to those he loved, his friends and family.
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Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 10:55 am
He lied to her. Thats all she got from the talk. She would send someone after him one day, one he wouldn't know but she would find him.
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