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 Posted: Tue Jul 19, 2011 9:13 am
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xMEET THE CONTESTANTS:
THE BARELY LEGAL EDITION Today, I bring you our youngest contestant. At least, I think she is. If she's not, she sure looks it.
So anyway, I'm auctioning off Wonder Woman's scrapbooking partner. (Oh those scrapbookers, always scissoring.)
OMG TRUTH LASSO LOL, MESSIN' UP UR LIFE.
I IZ READY FOR MY CLOSE-UP.
Teenagers with their freaking chatspeak.
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Posted: Tue Jul 19, 2011 9:14 am
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x First off, don't bid on Cassie if you're a gay dude. She's got this terrible track record.
Here we see her macking it to two dudes...
UNF UNF SUPERBOY.
UNF UNF ROBIN.
...who are clearly more into each other.
I think that's why she's with Wonder Woman now, but maybe she likes chicks and dudes. I wouldn't doubt it.
Ok, so now that I've made the ground rules known, I'd like to let you know why you should bid on Cassie.
Cassie has the physique of a chick who works out a lot. This is a serious body builder here. She must spend so much time working out, that you won't have to worry about her driving you nuts by being there all the time.
This makes her super low maintenance.
And then, when you take her out, all your bros are so stunned that this incredibly hot chick gave you a lap dance and doesn't call you all the time. (Possibly because she's calling me.)
I think she also would be down for a threesome, but that's just speculation on my part. I can't say I've had one with her myself because she'll whip me with her truth lasso. Ugh, I hate those things. They're like a lumberjack to my wood.
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Posted: Tue Jul 19, 2011 9:15 am
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x Cassie is an Oscar award actress. So, she can fake an orgasm like a chief.
Just look at this performance:
SHE IS SO THRILLED. CAN'T YOU SEE IT IN HER EYES?
So you know she'll look just as into you. x
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Posted: Tue Jul 19, 2011 10:02 pm
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Posted: Wed Jul 20, 2011 7:00 am
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