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Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2011 2:26 pm
Setting:  The black and different shades of blue vixen paced up and down the rocks. This had been her home away from the Bamboo tribe and in waiting to become part of her mates tribe. Which as days and weeks passed it was becoming clear wouldn't happen. And now her mate Shai was leaving his tribe and sister for her. She knew she should be over joyed that he would be with her now instead of her being out her own but she felt bad cause she knew how much those things where apart of his life.
Sighing she walked over to the water and dipped her paw in moving it around in circles. That had caused problems between them as well as his ex love Thea, her own self doubt and her father's protectiveness. Everything was going down hill and quick and Shai seemed to be changing and she was worried. She could tell from the encounter with her father. He didn't seem to be his self.
But now she wanted to forget about all that. She wanted her mate out her away from others so they could just focus on them. Yes she wanted to know why he was changing but she felt a stronger need to have it just be him and her and the wild. They needed to get back to the basics in a sense.
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Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 11:39 am
Shai was changing. Life was becoming more and more bleak to him, his personality was slowly becoming that angry teen again. That angry boy. His lips twitched as he approached the area where Shinya had told him to meet him, tail flicking to the side. He spotted the blue vixen, padding up to her and watching her paw hit the water.
"Shinya."[/b He mused, looking at the sky, then the tree's. He was far from Lunarie, far from home. Or, what was his home. Now this was his home, the open wild. He didn't know what he wanted anymore, or even, where he belonged. It was a torturing feeling.
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Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 1:35 pm
Shinya was lost in thought as she let her paw play in the warm water. Her mind was troubled and playing over everything she knew since she had meet Shai. She had never known him to be angry like this. Protective and aggressive at times but not angry. She wondered if it was cause she had doubted her self which to him meant she doubted him. A frown scrunched up her muzzle and she thought.
A breeze carried a familiar scent to her nose which immediately pulled her out of her thoughts and made her sit up. She turned and looked to see her Shai not that far away. She gave him a kind inviting smile to say you-can-come-over-here-if-you-want
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Posted: Thu Jul 14, 2011 3:16 pm
Shai padded up to Shinya, eying her with crimson red eyes before glancing at the pool. He didn't respond to the smile, because, he wasn't to happy. Sure, he was with her, but life was stressful, it sucked the smallest joys from his life and spat it back out, trampling it. He was tired, sick and tired of his life and how it's once free flow was now harsh and strained, like when he was a kit. Like when he lived with his family. They white male was bitter as he clawed at the ground, ears resting against his skull as his already tensed shoulders raised slightly.
Seriously, life was becoming hell for him. Shinya should make him happy, but their recent fight had set the male off. Had made him wonder if she trusted him, and, ultimately he started to distrust himself. If she felt the way she did, he wasn't a good mate, was he?
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Posted: Thu Jul 14, 2011 5:03 pm
Shinya could tell he wasn't happy and that made her want to move toward him submissively but that wouldn't do. It would only make things worse and that was something she didnt want. Taking a deep breath she rubbed the top of her head against his chin and asked "Do you want to eat? If so I got some fish and birds for you along with a couple of berries. If not we can talk or do something else you would like, "she said in a soothing tone. She really had no clue how to handle this and knew she had messed up big time
Please deities she prayed. Let me get this right. Let me be with my mate and not tear us a part.
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Posted: Fri Jul 22, 2011 9:44 pm
He jerked away when she touched him, shocked from his state of absentees he was having. His eyes flashed, staring at her and trying to figure out what she had said. Fish. Birds. Berries. Food. For him. His lip twitched, head turning to the side.
"Thanks." He grumbled, ears lowering. His issues.... He had left Lunarie, his only family. He was leaving his sister behind, his nephews. He wasn't even life-mates with Shinya yet! They weren't life-mates! What the hell was that?! And his brothers... he couldn't stop thinking about Sin. About Yuki, about their past.
It was tiring, and he was breaking under the pressure.
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Posted: Fri Jul 22, 2011 9:48 pm
Shinya's eyes sharpened on him as he jerked away. Why was he pulling away from her? He had said he had already forgiven her so what was this. She grabbed him by his scruff and gently pulled him into her and than laid her head over him holding him to her. "Love tell me whats wrong? I am here for you. You can tell me anything so please love share with me what is eating at you." she whispered softly into his ear.
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Posted: Fri Jul 29, 2011 9:20 am
Shai scowled at Shinya when he was shoved down, wanting to push her aside. He didn't though, instead he tensed. How could he explain to her without rambling?
"Lunarie helped cover up my guilt." He finally hissed out, ears flicking backwards. "It helped me forget." He whispered, recoiling. "What I did to Yuki and Sin. What I caused... I forgot everything there. I forgot what I created. And now... now I can't stop..." He broke off, quiet.
He had hurt them. Shinya felt inferior to Thea, his brothers he had broken.... His life was a joke. A sick, broken joke.
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Posted: Sun Jul 31, 2011 10:09 pm
Shinya stared down at him as he scowled. He was so not going to do that to her and she wasn't going to back down. Once she was able to get him to lay she laid her head on his.
She murmured softly to him like one did to a baby. Allowing him to go on with what he was saying. Obviously he needed to let alot of things out and she would sit here and listen till he was done and than suggest something to help.
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Posted: Sun Jul 31, 2011 10:42 pm
Shai grumbled slightly, paws digging down into the ground violently. "I want them to forgive me, but I have no right. They are people with feelings, feelings I destroyed." He whispered, looking away. "They hate me, and I deserve this hate, deserve this feeling." He looked at Shinya, eyes narrowing slightly, very slightly. He didn't want her to see this. this mess of a person he was becoming.
"Sin would rather kill me then listen to me. And Yuki? I..." He sighed, head shaking side to side.
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Posted: Sun Jul 31, 2011 10:57 pm
Shinya stared back into his eyes giving him a look. Seeing if he would become more angry. She could deal with it but didn't want it to happen. "You were all young. And in youth you make mistakes some that are very wrong and when your older and realized how much damage is caused you want nothing more than to take it all back and be forgiven.' she whispered softly.
"I have never talked to sin to much and have talked more to yuki. Me and him seem to be on an ok level. Sin your probably right on. Yuki I believe and this is just from what I see but I am not him and could be wrong feels hurt and since Sin was the only one there so he follows his lead. Yes he feels wronged by you but because of his mate and his kids I think he is starting to become bigger than those feelings and just want to forget it all and be happy with his family,'
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Posted: Mon Aug 01, 2011 4:03 am
"His family."
Shai looked up at her then, and for once the strong male had fear in his eyes, wild fear mixed with hurt and longing. "I'm not his family. He hates me. I know what I did, Shinya! I know. I let that b*****d hurt him." At this point he began to panic, head jerking to look at the ground. "I know! I know I was a bad brother! I only loved Nuishan! It was her! Only her! And she tried to make me turn around for Sin. Tried to make me stop running from home with only her."
He twitched then, ready to wrench away from Shinya and continue avoiding her. He turned to her now, really looked at her with those fear filled eyes, and said: "I want to be a dad, Shinya! But how can I when I left two kits alone to die! I know. I know! I was a kit, too! But that doesn't... there are no excuses! There never is!"
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Posted: Mon Aug 01, 2011 5:29 pm
"He has his only little family that he has started and is part of a bigger family. Your family. Just like when we have kids they will still be your family but you will have your own family,"Shinya tried her best to explain but she was worried she was failing her mate again.
Shinya looked him dead in the eyes and pinned him to the ground so he couldn't escape her. Yes she was being alpha at the moment but it was needed or so she believed. "I dont think he hates you. Yes he hates what has been done but I think he has grown up and wants to forget the past. Sin I noticed has grown up to. Did you see? He has a new mate as well. They are growing and changing from the kits they were just like you are. Yes being a kit isn't much of an excuses but it is the truth. You have grown and changed since them. You want to apologize for what you have done Yuki wants to move on. Sin I'm not sure about him. So here is what I suggust and I will go talk to Yuki first if need be and let him talk to Sin. But I suggust you guys get together and put it all out there. Bare your souls to one another. Get this done with so you can all move on with your lives. Your guilt is eating at you cause you havent said that you wish you could go back and change things. They might not forgive you but this will take some of that guilt away. This will make all three of your lives a little healthier so you each can move on and continue your lives. It will be hard but you can do it."she told him.
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Posted: Mon Aug 01, 2011 5:49 pm
He easily slipped her off him, shaking himself off. The male eyed her, silent as he moved away to look at the water. Finally, he turned to her, eyes narrowing. He knew she was right, and yet this was the hard part. Why? Why did someone else get it and he hadn't? Why?
He stared at the blue vixen, red eyes watching blue. Suddenly, he moved to her, pulling her closer and resting his head on her shoulder. He couldn't stop it, the strong male, that male that held his head high, he started to shake. To cry. This was his mate, someone he had just been yelling at like she wasn't even the one he loved.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry Shinya. I shouldn't have yelled. I love you Shinya.... I shouldn't have acted like this."
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Posted: Mon Aug 01, 2011 6:14 pm
Shinya sat there sitting tall as she forced her self not to show that she felt pushed away when he pulled away. She wouldn't let it known. She would sit here and be the strong one. She told her self over and over as she watched him.
She was a bit surprised as Shai suddenly pulled her closer. She wasn't expecting this from the past few moments. She had expected more yelling and ranting which she would have totally understood.
"Ssssh love its ok,"she whispered to him kissing his cheek as he began to cry, "You needed to yell and let it all out," she kissed him on the lips "It made you feel better atleast a little bit did it not?"
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