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I agree, with you Rmcdra, we should educate ourselves about the topic. Knowledge is power, power we can use against the dark one and his armies. Sadly, I am one of the people that have a negative few on it, because of the media, school, and the lack of concern on sex in general. No to mention, my parents, bless them, never took time to talk. So, I was left with what, my church and classes spoke of the topic, which isn't much. I chose the path of abstinence, for a number of reason. (family and friends, who have/had to grow up with a deadbeat parent, or not knowing the love of two parents, Fear that the person would think less of me after the event, despite the way I feel about them. the list goes on for some time.) Though, sometimes I think that path is the only one as a Christian, I could walk. Which, had lead me to be a little... distant in my relationships with other people. I even question, at times, what does it feel like to have that kind of emotional bond, to fall that deeply for someone else.

Now, I find myself with a friend, who I care for, that is the opposite of me in that regard, and I fear for her. I know, it is her life and she can do what ever she wants. But, she told me once she doesn't like the road she is on. And, that she wants to change, but I know not what to do or say to help. I am from the other side of the fence and all I can do is look over and wish to grant some words of wisdom.

The only words I could tell her was, the story from the bible of the adulteress and Jesus(John 8 1-11) and tell her about God's love. I pray every day for her, but I know not what else I could even do. We do not get to see each other, as our relationship is strictly an online one. I am by no means trying to change her, I just want her to know if she wants there is a way to change herself. As I said, I really care for her and only wish she find lasting happiness.

I would love to bring her in here, but she isn't quiet the... I really don't know how to put this,... faith maybe... type of person. She believes in God, Satan, heaven and Hell, and she prays, but other than that she is kind of silent on her views. So, I don't think she would come if I asked.

What I do know, is she at one point in time, said I shouldn't talk to her any more because I am Chastity, where she is Lust. And she would corrupt me. So, I am thinking it is more the faulty dichotomy. But, this is a guy from the outside of her life trying to read in between the lines. When I see her, I see a human; who has faults but who alive doesn't? But a human, that requires love, caring, affection, far more than what she has been given. Maybe, I am just reading to much into it. I don't know.

While I think sex is something to be respected, I don't see think it should be treated as taboo like many churches do today. My youth group talked about it, but they never told us what to believe. They just stressed that it was important, and that you should respect yourself and your partner enough before jumping into bed with them. I never felt like sex was bad or dirty (well, maybe a little, but I don't think that came from my church), I just knew through high school it wasn't something I was going to be doing for a while. I support others in waiting for marriage, but I didn't and I'm pretty okay with my choice I waited for a long term, stable relationship with someone I loved, and I think it was a good decision that strengthened our relationship. In many ways, I think waiting longer would have been detrimental. This stems largely out of my view on marriage though. I consider myself pretty well educated on sex and sexuality though. I did a lot of research on sex/contraception/etc when I went on the pill, and I GLBT rights are a big deal for me. I do feel like my actions and beliefs and knowledge kind of make me looked down upon by some Christians though, which is frustrating, especially since I don't feel like I've done anything wrong.

I really want to read Sex God by Rob Bell. I just started one of his other books and I'm really liking it, so I think Sex God might have some interesting thoughts for me.

I honestly believe that most Christian institutions promote ignorance in many areas, not just sex. Those who take it upon themselves to educate themselves and understand other ways of thinking and points of view are typically snubbed...

I think unconsciously, many leaders of the church think that the more ignorant a person is, the more blessed they will be... somehow basing their belief in a misrepresented version of the passage of doubting Thomas... (John 20:29) I have heard the verse twisted more than once to be used as base for "ignorance is blessed"... a refute from leaders that they are right and by blindly trusting their view (as they feel they have received it from God) is more blessed than trying to discover the truth for yourself... the same goes for Luke 18:6 (Matt 19:14)...

I don't believe sex is dirty, and I do believe that abstinence is safest, at least at first, until a person is old enough to distinguish between physical euphoria, raw emotion, and true feeling. I think anything can be turned into a stumbling block if we allow it to control us, as much of our society seems to let their sex drive control how they think and act, I believe that our society as a whole has a serious issue, but that doesn't make sex itself bad.

Ultimately though, when a person is ready to make the decision, it is a private decision that has nothing to do with the church, and when the church takes it upon itself to enlighten the person as to their potential folly, it tends to breed confusion, anger, and hatred in the congregation... something that shouldn't be present in a church.

Very beautifully put Elta. It's the elephant in the room that everyone says to ignore but one day that elephant is going to go rampaging. There are sometimes when a church should speak up, like in cases of *****, rape, and beastiality, but in most cases this is an area where personal discovery and gentile guidence is the best course of action, not legalistic condemnations.

you know he had me thinking about something. Does p***s size matter in a male homosexual relationship? I don't think it does but I honestly don't know. Would anyone with more information be willing to enlighten me about this?