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Name: Astrid Rosenkranz

Nickname: Ash

Age: 24

Birthday: December 4th

Sign: Sagittarius

Gemstone: Topaz

Blood Type: A-

Fav. Food: Anything sweet but mostly cakes and pastries

Hated Food: Vegatables.

Profession: Research assistant at the DC Museum of History and Arts

Hobbies:
Scandanivian History - Ever since Ash discovered that the sword her father keeps above the mantle pieces was -actually- weilded by a Viking warrior she has been obsessed with her family's history and the history of the Scandanivian areas. She has mountians of books on the subject, studied Norse history in college, and works at the History museum to help out with their small (which rather annoys her) Viking collection. Her apartment is full of little replica trinkets she's picked up over the years and a jaw with "Norway or Bust" scribbled on it where she keeps her future vacation fund. She even went to a festival celebrating the Vikings one year and bought a really cute outfit to wear around despite her friends thinking it was silly.

Dungeons and Dragons - Three bags of dice, mini-library of books, pewter figures and all. Ash got into DnD when she was in highschool and has been playing on an off ever since. She usually finds groups through message boards or at the local gaming shop but has, sadly, not found one she'd like to hang around with perminatly. She finds it a realaxing way to spend an afternoon because it means she can completely ignore the real world and unlike videogames she does actually get social interaction.

Painting Minatures - Speaking of her nerdy hobbies Ash also enjoys spending hours hunched over a magnifying glass with -teeny tiny- paint brushes putting delicate details on her mini's. Or some times it's someone elses' mini because they can't paint and she can get some extra spending money for it. She's even entered a few of her masterpieces in contests but hasn't gotten higher than an honorable mention (yet!).

Gardening - Despite living in an apartment in the middle of the city Ash LOVES to garden. She has flower boxes all the way around her balcony, one large fern in the corner, a few low light plants inside, and some lucky bamboo that her favorite professor gave her when she graduated. Her favorite flower boxes are the two she's filled with herbs because it means if she opens her balcony door she can smell them all day.

Virtues:
Mind like a steel trap Intuitive -- She blames too much tv and exposure to nerds for this but Ash is very good at making giant leaps when she's thinking about something. Since she's into a variety of different things she has a large base of knowledge to pull from and bypass giant chunks of what most people would call 'needed information' and still come up with the right answer. Her friends in college used to joke about her being able to just 'know' things even though half the time she was basically pulling it out of nowhere. It helps her at work given that she will often think of looking at something very odd for answers and finding things much faster than her superiors would have found on their own.

All Hail The Underdog! Just -- Ash believes that everyone should get equal treatement and this genereally leaves her standing on the side even if that means she has to rebel against what scoiety's telling her is right. She has very strong personal morals and will fight tooth and nail against anyone who tries to go against those. She never backs down from a fight about what is right and what is wrong and has been a unlikely alley to a few people in her time. Her friends find this one of her best virtues because they know no matter what happens Ash won't let 'evil' win.

A-line skirt please. Sever -- Some people would consider this a flaw but most who know Ash count her nature as a virtue. While most people will let little mistakes go when Ash expects something of someone she expects it to be right, and she means right. She doesn't let people around her make mistakes and will push people to succeed helping them however she can. Even if this means staying up all night to get them through a problem or forgoing her own recognition so they get some she will do it to make sure everything is perfect.


Flaws:
Rock and a Hard Place Stuborn -- When Ash sets her mind to something it takes heavy machinery and occasionally dynamite to move her. Even when she is wrong, and sometimes knows she is wrong, she will continue with whatever argument, action, etc that she has declaired as right. This makes arguing with her like shashing your face into a brick wall, repeatidly. She has even taken her stuborn nature so far as to do it on purpose just to make things harder on someone else because she has the ability to get her way and doesn't like them. Many of her collegues at the museum know it's easier to just let her do things her own way, and get in trouble later, than to try to stop her.

But i -like- being alone Socialy inept -- Ash spent a lot of time studying and not a whole lot of time socializing as a child and young adult. Because of this she -much- prefers to be alone and to interact with people via some sort of outlet. She's okay playing DnD because no one thinks she's weird there. She likes chatting on message boards and things online too but put her in a room full of people and she'll go hide in the corner and pray that no one notices she's there. She never knows what to say and when she does say something it usually makes people stare at her oddly so she'd much rather just not.

Well the "Man" can shove it Rebelious -- If she were to ever write a book about her life the title would be 'Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better'. Ash -never- takes 'its impossible' as an answer and considers rules to be something other people have to follow. She's going to do whatever she wants no matter what anyone says, even moreso if they specifically tell her she can't. She hates being told she can't or shouldn't do something and will often go out of her way to do it anyway just because. She hates authority and thinks she could get so much more accomplished if people would just let her get on with things.

PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION

Eyes: Bright blue with gold flecks.

Hair: [x] General style, in Page for there is a flower/wings clipped to the side where the fall of curls is. Blond

Face: Oval with rounded cheeks

Clothes: Jeans and fluffy sweaters. She likes to be comfortable when she's working and the museum is usually -realy- cold.

CIV SIDE:


Her hobbies are lovely. No real issues there!


Astrid's Mind Like A Steel Trap trait seems less like a personality trait and more like an excuse to metagame. You state that she has a lot of general knowledge on a very wide range of topics, and based on that she has some magical mental process that lets her come up with the right answer to a problem faster than everyone else? You shouldn't be able to make ridiculous leaps of thought from A to D without even considering B and C. This might be how problem-solving is portrayed in crime dramas and such, but it is NOT how people find the answers to mysteries in the real world.

There is nothing about this characteristic that isn't overpowered or gamebreaking. Having a "my character just knows things!" trait is always going to be overpowered even if you try to provide an explanation for it. It would be incredibly inconsiderate to other players if your character is able to come up with the right answer first in every situation, or to "just know" a secret that has every IC reason to stay secret without actual RPed work being put into uncovering it.

If you want your character to be intelligent, it would be much more constructive to give her a brand of intelligence that's more limited and realistic. I'd recommend basing it off of her other virtues and interests somehow: for example, if she's good at painting miniatures, maybe that means she's good at paying attention to details when she has the time to sit down and investigate something. Or maybe she's really Focused, which enables her to be very precise and deliberate with things outside of that hobby.

I need more information about her moral beliefs talked about in her Just virtue. Is it just the idea that she believes everyone should be treated equally -- and what do you mean by that? Is it that Astrid is after equal rights, or is it that she tries to give strangers the same treatment that she would give close friends? How does this relate to her views on right vs. wrong, and what are her views on this? You need to give us an idea of what her beliefs are, not just tell us that she has them! I would also like to see how she acts on these beliefs outside just fighting for them when she's confronted about them.

You also need to avoid phrasing like "Her friends find this one of her best virtues" and so on. It's okay to say that her friends can count on her or predict that her peers may generally respect her for it, but you should not be establishing what other characters will actually think about her in the description. This is going to be decided by their players.

Severe as it is written looks more like a flaw than a virtue: you're describing an extreme perfectionist who has zero tolerance for mistakes from her peers, and actively pushes them around so that their work is up to her high standards. I would highly recommend moving this to the flaw set, since you even admit in the description that this is something people might not like about her.

Again, you cannot state that her friends are going to admire Astrid for this because you cannot assume that's what other players are going to write their characters thinking, so the justification you have for it being a virtue is not going to work. If you want this to also be a virtue, I would focus on how she has these high standards and does not let herself slip up and living up to them. It would be a good idea to not drop the flaw side entirely, though, since "bossy perfectionist" is a really good flaw.

Stubborn and Rebellious are similar enough that they would work better combined into a single trait than they do as two separate ones. They both talk about how Astrid is always convinced that her viewpoint is right / superior to everyone else's, demonstrate how impossible she is to argue with, and go on to say that sometimes she'll take an action just to spite others or make life more difficult for them. There really isn't much difference between the two, so you should either take one off or merge them together.

I am also really confused by her Socially Inept trait: it doesn't seem to match up with anything else she has going on! In the rest of her profile you have her set up as this very bold, assertive individual who doesn't have a problem speaking her mind to her peers or doing what she wants regardless of what anyone says or thinks about it, so it really doesn't make any sense at all that this super severe and headstrong personality is suddenly an awkward little wallflower in social situations. You need to give her flaws that are more consistent with the rest of her traits -- for example, you've already hinted a bit at a Spiteful or Aggressive nature in her other traits. It would help a lot to expand on this!


POWERED SIDE:

You need to describe how many targets she can hit, how long the stun effect can last and how severe the stun is for both her Squire and Knight-level spells. A maximum amount of time you can channel -- with a way for the channeling to possibly be broken -- is going to be preferred a maximum number of uses, unless the effect is meant to last a very short time (15 seconds or less).

I would recommend something less powerful than a taser stun at Squire, since that is extremely severe! A stun effect is fine, but please be careful making it appropriately powered. A more severe effect (e.g. one that confers a greater advantage to your characters and her allies) should have a shorter maximum duration time.