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Mission: Never Gonna Give You Up

Difficulty: Rick Astley (Easy)

This is ridiculous.

Still, we can't deny a legitimate request for help, I guess. Ever hear of the Oreburgh Mining Museum? You have? Good. Every year, it hosts a famous gemstone exhibit, usually with soft, classical live music.

I can't believe I'm saying this. But you have to go defend it against a group of pranksters. There's six of them, and they've gained notoriety lately by going around and crashing events. Kidnapping their entertainment, then replacing it by...

...I'm not kidding here...

...impersonating that old singer, Rick Astley, performing his song "Never Gonna Give You Up" at a high volume when least expected. Two of the group members are dancers, three are instrument players (mostly a pair of synthesizers and a drum set,) and the last is the Astley Impersonator himself.

The instrument players shouldn't be too much trouble. I hear they lack Pokemon. But the dancers work together in battle, using a Spinda and a Buneary in tandem, while the impersonator himself has been known to use a Wigglytuff.

Look, I know how ridiculous this looks, alright? But do it anyway. A bunch of important scientists and wealthy folks are going to be there, and it'll be bad for our reputation in Sinnoh if we ignore this. Plus, they are legitimately trespassing on the event.


Objective:
Stop the Rickroll from happening!

Opposition:
The drummer and synth players don't have any Pokemon. It's the two dancers, with their Spinda and Buneary, and the Astley Impersonator, with his Wigglytuff, that you really need to watch out for.

Pokemon:
You may snag one Pokemon available at your rank from the Rickrollers, or capture a single wild Pokemon available at your rank from the wilds on the way to Oreburgh.

Rewards:
Vary depending on mission quality.

Protip:
Make it funny, and do interesting things. I don't want to see you just go there and beat the crap out of these guys. This mission was made with a humorous touch. Take it on with that in mind.

Mission: "Never Gonna Give You Up"

Objective: Stop the Rickroll from happening!

~~~

Fortune lay on her bed, surfing the Internet for anything interesting going on in the world. One advertisement caught her eye: The Oreburgh Gemstone Exhibit. Her yellow eyes frantically scanned the details, unable to resist something like this. Some of the most beautiful stones were to be put on display. Fortune grabbed her gear and was about to walk out the door when her SNAG beeped, indicating that a message had been received. She grudgingly opened the message and read the contents.

"This is ridiculous.

Still, we can't deny a legitimate request for help, I guess. Ever hear of the Oreburgh Mining Museum? You have? Good. Every year, it hosts a famous gemstone exhibit, usually with soft, classical live music.

I can't believe I'm saying this. But you have to go defend it against a group of pranksters. There's six of them, and they've gained notoriety lately by going around and crashing events. Kidnapping their entertainment, then replacing it by...

...I'm not kidding here...

...impersonating that old singer, Rick Astley, performing his song "Never Gonna Give You Up" at a high volume when least expected. Two of the group members are dancers, three are instrument players (mostly a pair of synthesizers and a drum set,) and the last is the Astley Impersonator himself.

The instrument players shouldn't be too much trouble. I hear they lack Pokemon. But the dancers work together in battle, using a Spinda and a Buneary in tandem, while the impersonator himself has been known to use a Wigglytuff.

Look, I know how ridiculous this looks, alright? But do it anyway. A bunch of important scientists and wealthy folks are going to be there, and it'll be bad for our reputation in Sinnoh if we ignore this. Plus, they are legitimately trespassing on the event."

Fortune shuddered with silent laughter. Her Squirtle appeared and stared at her curiously. It shrugged and proceeded to put on a pair of sunglasses. Fortune regained her composure and hastily packed the rest of her gear. After putting on the Snag Machine, which she had spent two hours detailing in gold, red, and navy blue, she rushed out of the HQ.

At Vermilion Port, Fortune boarded a ship bound for Sinnoh. The captain decided to turn on some music to make the journey go faster. Fortune nearly passed out as "Never Gonna Give You Up" began playing at an unnecessary volume over the boat's stereo system. She turned and glared at the captain, who responded by turning up the volume even further. Fortune's Squirtle smiled in the satisfaction that it had bribed the captain so easily into playing that song as loud as possible. It adjusted its shades and continued sunbathing on the ship's deck.

In Sinnoh, Fortune sighed in relief that she didn't have to hear any more Rick Astley for a while. She jumped on her Hoverboard and sped off to Oreburgh City. Along the way, she watched the scenery fly by as the wind went through her long blue hair. Squirtle, on the other hand, found it an opportune time to fill up water balloons and throw them at passerby people and Pokémon. Fortune took no notice of this and continued on her way to Oreburgh.

The mining town was bustling with activity prior to the annual Gemstone Exhibit. Several well-to-do people busied themselves by talking about the upcoming event or trying to get a look at the stones that were set to be displayed. A large stage at one end of the event area caught Fortune's attention as she approached the fairgrounds. Several security guards barred entrance to the event until it was scheduled to begin. Fortune however, couldn't wait. She called out Squirtle and Nidoran. The two Pokémon looked about, trying to take in their surroundings. Fortune called their attention and murmured, "We need to distract those guys over there. Got any ideas?" Squirtle responded by donning its sunglasses and giving a mischievous smirk.

Ten minutes later, a fight broke out near the entrance to the Gemstone Exhibit. A Houndoom had ran into a few trainers while chasing Nidoran, who had "borrowed" the hound's collar. This in turn caused the trainers to attempt to stop the enraged Pokémon before things got out of control. The security guards left their posts to calm the situation as well. Squirtle and Fortune crept up to the gate and slunk into the event unnoticed.

Inside the event area, the pair met up with Nidoran, who dropped the collar and got away unscathed from the Houndoom. Fortune looked about, noting the patrolling security. Suddenly, a ridiculous idea popped into her head. She reached into her bag and pulled out a small tuxedo. Squirtle caught on quickly after a moment of confusion and put the costume on. Squirtle proceeded to walk out into the main path and right up to a guard. The turtle caught the guard's gaze by kicking him in the shin and yelling "Squirtle! Squirtle!"

"Why you little..." the guard growled as he kicked Squirtle, knocking the tiny turtle Pokémon around like a pinball all over the event area, crashing into some display cases along the way. Fortune gawked, partially because of the beauty of some of the stones and partially because she did not anticipate the guard's reaction. She shook her head and made her way to the stage, stopping frequently to gaze at various gems and pieces of jewelry. Nidoran had to continually remind her to keep moving by pricking her leg with one if its spines.

Onstage, Fortune looked at the instruments. Two synthesizers and a set of drums. What do these people classify as 'classical' music? she thought to herself. Remembering her task, she proceeded backstage unnoticed. Squirtle caught up and gave its trainer an icy glare, clearly angry at its place in the last stunt. It kept quiet though, since the Rickrollers were about twenty feet away, preparing for their own stunt.

Squirtle immediately got its revenge. It had snagged an MP3 player with a particular song on it. Squirtle maxed out the volume on the headphones and placed them over Fortune's ears. The song "Never Gonna Give You Up" blared around the area as well as in Fortune's ears. She had to keep herself from shrieking in shock as she threw the MP3 player in a random direction. That direction happened to be where one of the synthesizer players was standing. The device struck him right in the back of his head. After the initial shock, he picked it up and realized it was the song that they were planning on playing. "I told you that we were off on the rhythm!" he announced. "Listen!"

The other band members didn't listen, however. They realized that they were being watched by somebody. The Astley impersonator laughed. "What's this?" he chuckled. "A fan of the beauty that is me? I'm sorry, but I don't sign autographs." He motioned to the dancers to block Fortune's path. Rick tried sit down in a nearby chair, missed the first time, then recovered and sat on the table instead. "I'll level with ya, babe," he said smugly. "I know why you're here; you want to stop me and my band from performing at the Gemstone Exhibit. I'll go... On one condition." He paused, adjusting the disturbingly accurate Rick Astley costume. "You have to play my song better than I can."

Fortune stood in complete awe. "You can't be serious," she said aloud. "You--" She stopped, thinking about how the circumstances could work in her favor. "Alright. I'll take you on... Mister Astley," she said slyly. She called out Nidoran and Squirtle. "These two are gonna play the instrumental bits and I'll sing." Her two Pokémon stared into Fortune's yellow eyes with the perfect expression of 'What the heck are you thinking?' Nonetheless, Squirtle manned the drums while Nidoran reluctantly stepped up to the synthesizer. Nidoran started the song with a horribly timed synthesizer rhythm.

After possibly the worst performance of "Never Gonna Give You Up" ever witnessed by anybody played at a rather loud volume, Fortune led Squirtle and Nidoran offstage in a hurry. The Astley impersonator and his crew stepped up to the mic and instruments. Their audience was an irate group of security and police who'd heard the absolutely terrible rendition of that accursed song. Rick and his crew looked at the audience and attempted to make a hasty retreat before their performance. Fortune and Nidoran blocked the two stage exits by holding the doors closed from the other side. Squirtle on the other hand was busy untying the real performers, who appeared and confirmed that the Rickrollers had kidnapped them.

Later, a radio in one of the display booths aired a news report.

"A strange turn of events took place earlier today in Oreburgh City as the entertainment for the annual Gemstone Exhibit was kidnapped and replaced with the group of pranksters who have been ruining similar events all over the Sinnoh region. The group was apprehended earlier today thanks to the efforts of an unknown hero. The hero disappeared shortly after police arrived on the scene and declined to be named. I'm sure you are all with me when I say 'Thank you'. The annual Oreburgh Gemstone Show opened today as planned with the entertainment that was supposed to attend the event. Organizers of the event have extended their thanks as well. In other news..."

Fortune couldn't help listen to the radio as she looked over the beautiful pieces of jewelry on display. She examined a particularly eye-catching silver necklace inlaid with a teardrop shaped sapphire. "I'd like this one," she said to a man in a business suit.

"You're sure?" the man said, to which Fortune nodded. "Alright. It's the least I can do to reward you for saving this event." He called a guard over. The security officer unlocked the display case and took the necklace out, locking the glass case afterward. He handed it to Fortune and remarked, "That is the worst interpretation of that song I've ever heard."

All three of them laughed. The band onstage began another song. "It's better than them doing it correctly, though," Fortune laughed. She stayed for the duration of the event, trying to get that song out of her head as well as look at the thousand or so diamonds and gems at the show.

On the return trip, the captain of the boat waited until they were safely out to sea before playing "Never Gonna Give You Up" at full volume at least ten times on the way back to Johto. Squirtle and the captain both had a pleasant journey with earplugs...