[Resolved]

[Darkfox Soldier]

Well my fellow Gaians, I'm in need of a little advice here. Seeing as I've got a slightly biased opinion due to extremely high emotions of anger and fear, I need an opinion on how to approach my 'friend' again.

Situation:
I came out to a friend a few nights ago while I was studying. It was late and I had an important exam that I was studying for. He saw I was getting drowsy and offered me some caffeine. I don't mean from a soda but an actual drug/pill kind. He's a fellow soldier and we've trained together for a few years so I trusted him. Took the glass of water that he said he mixed it in and went on with my studies. Turns out it probably was something else he put in.

About a half-an-hour later, I start going into one of my depressed worry states where I'm afraid of what everyone will think of me at my campus if I ever came out. It got to the point I was on the verge of tears and having some suicidal thoughts because I was worrying that much. He comes up and asks what's wrong. I slowly hint and eventually tell him I'm not straight like everyone else here. He was fine with it and seemed supportive. I felt a lot better and thought I could really trust the guy a lot more with him knowing. Please note I've only actually 'come out' to 3 other people before. Being me and in the Army is still a big 'No No'.

A few days later, he opens up to me about how he had some problems in the past with drug use, anxiety, and among a few other things. I offer my support and tell him that I'm not there to judge him. He didn't judge me.

A few hours later I get a text from him telling me that the pill he gave me was supposed to (And I quote):

'That legal stuff I talked about is what I gave you. I knew it wouldn't hurt you, but it makes people think, makes people focus on current issues. I had been worried about you for quite a while and knew you wanted to tell me something, but at the same time didn't. So, I used my knowledge of one of the only things I'm good at to safely understand you better so I could help. I'm sorry I did it, I feel horrible, but deep down I know it helped both me and you. I'll understand if you hate me for the rest of our lives, but I hope that's not the case. Thanks for the help, I couldn't ask for a better friend. I mean it.'

Mission:
I'm very mad at him right now. I feel strongly betrayed because I almost feel like he gave me an intentional shove into telling me. We've been training together for 3 years and have at least two more ahead of us. I feel like he broke my trust just as much. I just honestly don't know how to deal with this. He sounds sincere and has done his best to help people before but it feels like he went too far and pushed me when I wasn't really ready in my normal mind set.

Objective:
Should I kept trusting him, start over, stay away for a while? I honestly don't know what to do here. I'm even more afraid he'll 'out' me to the rest of my unit.  

[Shanna66]

what he did was wrong but clearly he was and is very worried about you. and at least he admited to it.

its up to you wether or not to break of this friendship. i would talk to him about it and let im know you feel betrayed  

[angel_of_darkness_4000]

I can understand that you have been betrayed. It is something hard to forgive, but if you consider him a true friend, I think you should talk to him about it.

I would discuss all your fears with him. Especially the ones about him "outing you" Let him know that until further notice you will not be able to fully trust him. Let him know you need some time to think and that even though you are mad, you still wish to be friends, considering that you will be near him for the next couple years. Also let him know, he is going to have to regain your trust.

This is just my opinion, you don't have to follow it...but I hope everything works out.  

[Sin Error]

Good friends are hard to come by, what he did was bad yes, but the intention he did it with was for a a good cause. in my opinion you should try to talk to him and tell him how you felt about the whole situation, beacuse I'm 100% sure that things will now get even better between you and him, maybe the trust will grow stronger and so will your friendship. i know, beacuse when I told my best friend I was gay, things got so much better between me and him, there was more trust, we would talk more and the same thing happened to my boyfriend with his best friend.
now I can't tell you what to do, what you do is completely up to you, but I hope the post helps. razz  

[Atrum_Anima]

Bad thing + Good intentions + Apologies = Forgiveness (?)
The betrayal you feel is understandable, but as of now, the bottom line seems to be that nothing incredibly negative came of it. My opinion is that life is too short to hold grudges.  

[AstridMiriam]

Your welcome?