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If they want to support you- asking them to help you in your research is a good start.

Maybe telling them you're frustrated when they call you Wiccan would help too- since they might as well be calling you a Quaker, because you're not one.

I wouldn't worry about it, actually. I mean, they're supportive, and beyond that it's not terribly important. In time it will probably be easier to nudge them in the more accurate direction, but for now just count your blessings and let it go. Maybe pass on to them books you've enjoyed if they're interested in reading them themselves.

On the subject of them calling you Wiccan. Have you given them an alternate term to use? For a lot of folks, the only term they know for a pagan faith is "Wicca". This can be blamed on the ubiquity of certain authors and publishers I think, as well as popular TV shows like Buffy. I understand that you've told them you're a "Seeker" but that doesn't define anything easily for them. I seeker isn't anything exactly. They're just someone who's exploring and searching. In some contexts, it can imply seeking a specific path (like Wicca) but it's not a path in itself and that can be difficult for a lot of people to understand. Even just telling them to call you Pagan might work, since for a lot of folks who don't know any better, it's a synonym for Wiccan.

Triumph of the Moon by Ronald Hutton is, as the book itself says, a history of modern pagan witchcraft.

This may be a bit rambly, but forgive me - I'm getting old. emotion_drool

It sounds as if your mother is gently trying to discourage you from your research; of course, you will know better than I if that's her intent or not. When you're still a minor and living in your parents' home, it can be difficult to have any kind of active pagan practice. If you're in the US, your parents have the legal right to decide on your religious education. If they don't want you learning about something, that's their right to decide. Frustrating, but you need to keep that in mind.

Secondly, you're living under your parents' hospitality. They feed, clothe, and house you. Hospitality is a big deal to many pagan paths - respecting the generosity of your hosts is important, as well as respecting their wishes for their own spaces. This includes not doing things that make them unhappy or uncomfortable inside their own home - and for some parents' active pagan practice falls in that category. Being disrespectful to people's hospitality is not only rude, it's considered a moral failing by those pagan paths to whom it is important.

I understand that you didn't exactly choose to be where you are. None of us do, as kids. We grow up living with family and relying on them for our needs whether we want to be there or not. So it's frustrating when you only have your space - your room - as your parents permit and you're limited by it. But we've all been there. It doesn't last forever.

My honest advice? Don't rush. 'Paganism' isn't a religion in and of itself. It's an umbrella term for hundreds of different religions, with the only commonality being that they're not Judaism, Christianity, or Islam. Learn about different Pagan faiths, and decide if something suits you better than where you are now. In her way, your mother is right - paganism can be very complicated. Age and experience changes our perspectives and understanding. It has taken most of us many years to end up where we are, and you will spend your life learning and evolving. You will probably (and really should) explore several different pagan paths before you decide what is the best fit for you.

Ask yourself if your parent(s) really need to know what you're interested in, believe, or practice. My answer was 'No.' It really wasn't any of their business. I didn't tell my parents about my beliefs or practices until I was an adult in my own home. I began exploring paganism and witchcraft around the same age you are now. I didn't have any altars or shrines when I lived with my parents, no tools or outward signs or symbols, no jewelry. I was allowed tealight candles, but no tapers and no incense. And I survived.

Of course, your situation may be different from mine - I was not raised in any kind of a religious household, by an athiest and a then-agnostic. But in the end you have one shining luxury - time. You have years and years ahead of you to explore and experience.

If you decide that it's none of your parent's business, you can keep your practices and beliefs to yourself. Be aware that choosing this method means you will pretty much always have to be guarded with your words and actions. It does mean being discrete - not leaving obvious things lying around, not having open displays or wearing obvious symbols, not having a open active practice. You learn ways of doing things that are just as powerful or meaningful, but are subtle. You may be able to do many small things without being noticed if you can be subtle and quiet about it.

If you decide to tell your parent(s) about your interests and your practices, be prepared to accept the consequences of doing so - positive and negative. Don't get defensive right off the bat - they're your parent(s), they will worry about you, and have concerns and/or fears about things they don't understand. Stay calm and centered, and keep things in the realm of rational, logical, factual. Hyperbole will only make things worse - so make you're really informed, and not spreading misinformation and tropes. Do your homework and make sure you properly understand the basics of what you're trying to explain. Be prepared for the questions you'll be asked, and try to have some resources you can offer for their own reading. Give your parent(s) time to process the information you're giving them - don't try to push them to any decision right then and there.

And if you get a negative reaction - well, there's not a lot you can do. If it's based on misunderstanding or misinformation on their part, direct them to books or websites where they can learn more. They may change their minds if more information is presented. But in the end if they decide, for whatever reason, that they don't want you practicing a Pagan religion in their home, you'll need to respect that decision. Sneaking around behind their backs, lying to them, or doing it anyway goes back to that whole hospitality thing - it's very disrespectful, and in return you lose their respect and trust.

I hope there's something in all this rambling I've done that will help you with your decision.

You're not really keeping stuff from your mother. You are really just going to be keeping things to yourself. There's a difference. You're not hiding anything from anyone. You simply aren't showing or keeping anything. You can't act as if you're hiding something. It has to be as if that thing doesn't exist.

Also remember that if your parent does ask you about it, they will deserve an honest answer. Even if you think it's none of their business and you've been discrete and respectful, if they ask you something about it, don't lie to them. If you deal honestly with your parent, it makes it easier for them to treat you like an adult. Being honest, and accepting the consequences of your actions, are very important in becoming an adult.