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Posted: Mon Apr 18, 2011 5:33 pm
Just taking a breather from the big DUN DUN DUNage of FE4 to bring you:  Yes, yes, I play girly anime games; sue me. Anyway, we all love dem' Sailor Moon (or at least if you grew up in the 90s like I did), so I wish to show you a game you probably never heard about because it never left Japan, but received a magnificent, top tier translation. Now this game, some people say it's awesome, some people call it crap, I'm in between that. On one hand, it's a Sailor Moon RPG, why the hell not? On the other hand, the battle system is designed poorly and you're left with two choices: break the game immensely and destroy everything in your path by taking advantage of the system, or play it like a generic RPG and die horribly. With that said, let's take advantage of some simple coded battle systems and enjoy our precious Sailor Moon in RPG form! PS: If I were to be a *****, Minako would totally be my choice for my heinous crimes. Also, please note that because this is a new LP, the new rules are in effect; please PM me if you want to comment!
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Posted: Mon Apr 18, 2011 5:39 pm
Reserved for comments (providing anyone likes Sailor Moon mad )
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Posted: Mon Apr 18, 2011 5:40 pm
Chapter 0: The Inevitable Prologue to Any SNES Game Awright, so let's go to the future NOT destroyed by Hollywood and the Mayans.  Good God, you'd think by now they'd have discovered everything and had highways up in that b***h by now.  Oh, oh my, hopefully it's not-  ...well this IS an SNES game, and we gotta have a plot somewhere in there.  V-v-v-voice acting in an SNES game?! Why do you leave all the good s**t in your own country, Japan? emo  It's called: learn to future technology Crystal Tokyo. mad rolleyes Sure we'll need more of those running around pretending they are important.  The Gin-what? Like a Ginsu knife or something?  Didn't we kill him like... eight hundred seasons ago?  Yet again.  Like is it a cell phone or something? Or an earthquake; better run! Meanwhile, in some other, less idiotic (?) era:  Oh for- we just started this b***h up and Usagi is already being stocked! mad  Kind of like how you're doing right now? confused  ...sort of how it was my destiny to stomach this prologue.  Should've known there was a bigger, more creepier p***k behind this stocking.  Me too: it said something's gonna happen, and sure enough: something did! (my coat fell off the hanger, OH GOD).  And Usagi is lovin' this s**t.  If you're not familiar with the series, Chibi Usa's boyfriend is a ******** horse.  Okay, no Chibi Usa goes on this generic monster rant, but I didn't feel like screenshotting the big tower of text that I could sum up in three words.  Center stage, center stage..  B-but what did I do?! gonk  Which brings us to the title screen, possible confused or bored, pick one.
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Posted: Mon Apr 18, 2011 5:41 pm
Chapter 1: inb4tsunami Right, so let's start a new game that ISN'T in endgame of Ch.5, shall we? Crono.. Crono, wake up Crono! Totally called it. cool Is that a Clefairy on her bookshelf?  Once owning a cat, she's probably just waking you up to be a p***k.  Well, you ARE in Tokyo, what else is new?  Watch out for dem' tentacles!  B-but I'm apparently a loli schoolgirl, I have no place outside in the dead of night!  <******** off; needs beauty rest =m =  ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT MOM, YEESH! mad  And off we go, she sleeps in her school uniform, we are SO in Japan.  This would have been a lot less bitchy if we carried a pen around, but nooooo.  As in kill ugly things for a living, fun, fun, fun..  I just wanted to see what kind of manga you're reading, Shingo, oy yoy yoy, typical shota kids.  Big screen in the dining room? I so wish. emo  And it's the last time she'll go to bed, aah, the life of an RPG heroine..  And on our way out, why the hell not take medicine from a random man on the street?  Madam, she has a man who wears a tuxedo all day, everyday, she's set for life!  And we get ran over by a car, GAME OVER.. . . . . . . . . . . Okay, maybe not, see, they're quite nice in Japan and like to stop right in from of pedestrians and not go around, more of make you feel like a p***k for holding them up.  Jesus Christ, I probably couldn't even get my leg down that manhole. D;  Cross dressers are NOT weird! mad Let's go lulz at him after we go check out this shopping district.  OH GOD, FIRST SEASON LOVE INTERESTS, RUN AWAYYYYY!  Colourful stores? You're so different from society, Tokyo. cool  And a vending machine every other block? Yep, we're in Japan, guys.  But I thought that the modern society isn't supposed to know about the Senshi? D;  Well your kids are freaks. talk2hand  Hasn't been since first season, Melvin (I'm not obsessed enough to memorize his Japanese name), ditched the b***h when I got cooler friends. cool  Eh, Rei's a b***h, let's procrastinate on this one.  As in this whole RPG is apparently a school holiday as not once does Sailor Moon attend school in this game.  Okay, okay, fine, let's go lulz at crossdressers!  It must be bad..  Crossdressers in tights with a battle helmet? I like.  Youma already?! I just wanted to have fun though. sad  Please don't make us go through the redundant transformation sequence. gonk  Cue frameski-  ..I suppose that works as well.  No sassy spawn point, just a battle cry? D;  And the Youma's not lovin' this s**t, BATTLE TIEM!  Right, so boss fight, we're kinda lookin' squishy with that base HP.  We have a glorious two choices: A.) Saw the b***h in half with a sharped tiara B.) Fling around a wand that does nothing.  Yay, canon-ness in that Sailor Moon is a clumsy person and can dodge like a boss!  A tiara or two in the tits and a couple of Sailor Karate, we own the boss fight with a one whole HP loss.  Yes, Naru-chan, it was so sassy of me to mash the attack button five or so times.  So we do what most friends do and steal her valuable s**t and sell it for big yen.
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Posted: Mon Apr 18, 2011 5:42 pm
Chapter 2: Damn, Respawns I think the entire cast of Sailor Moon should be used to being randomly whisked away to wherever by now..  B-but we blew you up in an alternate dimensional tower in a gay rainbow crystal scene!  I guess if you skipped the prologue this whole rehash scene is valuable, but it's not for us, now is it?  -headdesk- No Mamaru, ghosts are real and you enjoy pillar'd rooms.  Is that like an expensive shiitake mushroom or something? D;  Meanwhile in a less "WAT" place in Tokyo:.  You don't see the damage scissor mark of the whole -1 HP we got from that fight?  Her sort of, not really boyfriend who was like in two episodes before disappearing into the shadow of plot, he can also tell fortunes.  That's... a sexy date.  They obviously don't know how to have fun on dates. mad  I just don't know, this part they get all snoopy on their love lifes. It could have something to do with me being a male, but this s**t is boring, let's hurry and go bag us some youma and lesbian Sailor Soldiers. mad  FINALLY, something worth mentioning! <3  She does that when someone recites the quadratic formula to her, Minako.  ...for ********, like honestly, at this point of the game, they just try to shove love interests in the whole non corny five seconds of cutscene, other than that, he serves NO PURPOSE OR RELEVANCE in this part.  You try saying that. mad  Okay You E Chi Row, see you never again!  Kay, so long story short: after a good hour or so of boyfriend talk, Ami gets tired of this s**t and goes to the "train station" and we are pervs and want to spy on her getting down whatever the ******** her boyfriend's name is's pants.  At least Makoto has the right idea to the storyline of this game.  So the Hikawa Shrine is in the ghetto of Tokyo apparently with a respectively ghetto bus that probably could only fit like 1/10th of the typical Tokyoese bus station rush IRL.  Uhh, we kind of missed that chance.  Literally like .1 of a second later:.  Sure, why the hell not? I don't know much about the world, so I can't judge the fact that there's trees growing in the middle of a street fairly.  Rei: "Dat a**." gonk They're like 15ish.  Yay, typical RPG panic!  Just because she carries a calculator everywhere, doesn't make Ami a monster. mad  With any luck, it's probably Ami's boyfriend, but hey, I could be wrong!  Sure Am's, we sensed your distress, and weren't stocking you all this time!  And to battle we go to save Ami's boyfriend from monsters!  Which makes me think: are we on a bullet train or an airplane? confused  Sailor Karate Rockstar!  And that's the last of the cool Sailor generic attacks, the rest scratch like pansies.  Right, so I'mma get technical for a moment: numbers mean everything in this game. I don't know what the calculations for attack are, but +7 Atk makes all the difference. So if you have troubles (not like you'll ever if you play this game), just gain a level, you'll win next time, guaranteed.  She is the strongest of the inner senshi by the way. cool  She's just... an item bot I guess..  I'd imagine if you were playing this the non-breaking way, she'd be a valuable member (dat Def), but since you want to kill everything first turn, first attack in this game before you move on (which isn't that hard), Def means jack s**t in this game.  I like Venus, and that's enough reason for me to use her all the way through this game, stat wise, she's not as haxx as Mars, but as you can see, she's decently balanced.  B-but you're not supposed to know her when she's in Sailor form though because the tiara and short, non school skirt makes that much of a difference apparently!  Apart from just talking to us .2 seconds ago, sure.
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Posted: Mon Apr 18, 2011 5:44 pm
Chapter 3: Plot'd! Thanks to the magical power of time progression, five skinny girls all carried some boy back to Rei's house/Hikawa Shrine and.. now we're all at Rei's house. In case you're wondering, it's about that whole comet shitstorm deal.  Finally, we'll know the secret of the enemy! Why the hell didn't Rei use this more in the anime? :/  -BOOM!- Apparently, the enemy is so badass (as usual) that just looking/spying on her via magical fire causes the vision to explode. Pics, or it didn't happen. Aasdalkdj;cvlkjsdf, LESBIANS! heart  Because if you forgot, Rei disappeared into the invisible bath nowhere to be found.  What else is new? confused If you're not familiar with the anime, Hotaru is some weak little girl with the "G" shaped scythe who likes randomly disappearing and reappearing in the middle of the Pacific Ocean just to be an inconvenience to the team. Oh, and if she felt like it, she could destroy the world. Plot syndrome. *cough*  It also is apparently so badass that the phone would explode if she went through the effort to tell us over it, so off we go in the frontier of Tokyo yet again.  A screen and a half later and maybe a left turn somewhere in there..  Classy, or maybe it's only my city that has individual rooms.  However, Hotaru gets her own room because she is special. wink And you should be used to that by now, Usagi. stare  How about.. every second Wednesday?  That basically means her badass alter ego that randomly grows six feet of hair and gets a big red "9" on her forehead and sprouts a flowy black dress. However, because she can now wear a mini skirt and a tiara, she can't turn into her anymore.  AKA: My life. emo  At this point, the team gets interrupted by a nurse who says she needs to give Hotaru her daily needle. Maybe she's just an amateur nurse thinking everyone needs needles? D;  I guess silly plot twists every now and then is a good idea as well..  Apart from Michiru being needle'd, as usual, the boss fight is a usual "SPACE SWORD BLASTA!" with a Sailor Moon heat stick spammage.  B-but episode laws only allow them to attack once in a hilarious manner!  She's been through time, space, alternate dimensions, yet to change fate is a concept beyond her understanding? Sure, why the hell not?  Meanwhile, in another, less believable future, our rebels are conversing with Apsu, this surely main antagonist who is shrouded in darkness.  Powers to shoot lasers? b***h please, that's all Minako can do, we outclass you in all ways. mad  But what is it? D;  Don't get too ahead of yourself, you gotta fight Rei first and she is one tough fire spewing cookie!  Hearts at the end? Pfft, you're not even subtle about this whole "Dark Sailor Senshi" rehash. talk2hand . Wait until you see her name, THEN all hell will break loose.  Dear God, don't even make me go into details about her hair, it's like polished rocks or something. gonk  Oh cute, they even have a shota to play as Chibiusa. Marduk is rockhair by the way. Right, so with out bad guy intro out of the way, just where will this story go? Find out next time in Let's Play Bishoujo Sensei Sailor Moon when we hit the town up and see what Tokyo is all about!
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Posted: Mon Apr 18, 2011 5:45 pm
Chapter 4: Tokyo Is Now Only Three Or So Blocks I guess even in the midst of demonic activity, a girl's gotta go shoppin', eh?  Pfft, it's never fun going shopping with lesbians -madface-, or the Mystery Gang for that manner. D<  Or, alternatively, we can just make up our goddamn minds! ...Usagi's house it is!  says Hotaru, and I thought she was ready to disappear in the hospital and reappear on top of an Egyptian pyramid for a second there, making the Sailor Squad have to go find her!  To replace your sub-par fighting skills/another target for the enemies to hit instead of just you? Welcome aboard Hotaru!  Right, so allow me to demonstrate how to kill EVERY enemy in this game in one hit: combo attacks. So, everyone can do what Usagi and Setsuna (yes, she joins eventually to break the game to the point that the final boss doesn't even get to move, not to mention, anything for that matter once she joins. Feel free to consult a couple of episodes if you didn't see that one coming) are doing, and 5/10 times, it creates an attack so broken that it can kill every single random encounter in the game to the point that you can literally put frameskip on (memory cursor, FTW!), tape down whatever your A is on your keyboard and call it a day. Today, we go with the strongest attack so far/maybe in the game, Usagi and Haruka- Usagi for her speed activation rate, and Haruka for her omgwtf (strongest in the game, naturally) Str. TL;DR- Setsuna is broken when we get her, and MakeUpLinks are also broken.  Yay, random encounters for all the WORLD SHAKINGGGGG! x 1,000 more !'s and DEEP SUBMERGEs that one can handle!  Michiru... I imagine she would have pretty cool MakeUpLinks that might be strong, but Haruka and Usagi is honestly all you need for this game to break it. Other than that, all her attacks are hit all, which is cool I guess.  Now Haruka, dear God... her Str growth is somewhat random, but most of the time it grows a stellar 9. To try and balance the game, the designers gave her one of the worst Spd growths in the game, but Usagi MakeUpLink with her~.  For the Goddess of Destruction who the Senshi once fought for three episodes straight, Hotaru doesn't really have impressive stats (hell, her scythe isn't as strong as Haruka's generic punches- both you should NEVER do anyway is somehow stronger), but her decent Spd, coupled with the cheapest, non MakeUpLink that goes on to be the strongest almost free attack in the game earns her a spot in my party permanently.  A couple of battles later, we now boast full magic and everyone caught up.  If you haven't noticed, I've been collecting puzzles to ******** with the enemy's apparent fetish for hoarding pieces to themselves. Why? Find out later, of course it breaks the game like 99% of things in this game when it's finished.  *Spends all my money already = 3= * Better things come along, so we can blow all the yen we have (oh damn, $257 in yen from killing things?)  Out of everyone- Hotaru is the only one with a new attack set from the anime, mainly because she doesn't really do anything in the anime except for die and be reborn over and over again. :/ So they gave her an attack that does 999 later on for two SP, why the hell not?  Oh... how... stereotypical, 1,000 yen says I can find a hentai reference! What's worse is it heals the senshi! gonk  In some other store, we find a shocking revelation that all the Senshi have their own Gameboys and all like Pokemon to the point that it makes them forget the fact that they got an energy ball to the head a few seconds ago, thus somehow healing them to max HP.  And now to break the game more: Accessories. Now, somehow- it's beyond me, but people in this game can equip two tiaras at the same time if they wanted, but why do that? It only boosts your Def, for now, we buy a shittonne of Bracelets to make Usagi do something for once/make her MakeUpLinks more haxx, and to make Michiru actually do more than single digit damage and Anklets for Haruka so she can World Shaking spam from turn one. I could really care less about Hotaru at this point, as she's sub-par until she gets her super accessories that then make her OHKO everything.  Damn it Shingo, find a different way to fap! mad  And for poor Sailor Squad, gets plot'd by an inconveniently placed Youma.  Whee~ Youma prancing around my house.  But why did they even dis-transform when they went to Usagi's house anyway? confused  Welp.  But I guess recovering his carcass is the LEAST we can do.  Holy Christ, the kid can run laps in his room if he wanted. =o  But much like any earlygame foe, it goes down in one MakeUpLink, woo.  We also mug $25 in its video game/ramen fund, which isn't a bad thing at all if I say so. :3  Fun fact: If you turn back into normal Usagi, he'll be a p***k to you again, because red things in her hair apparently make all the difference.  Smooth, Usagi, very smooth... Next Chapter- Annoying text messages from a cat, inevitable raids, energy balls and Mamoru is a wuss.
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Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2011 3:31 pm
Chapter 5: School Most Definitely Isn't Out For Summer!It hath been long my friends, much too long. So here is an LP update you've all been waiting for (and Ch. 4 is up : P )  But how does a cat even send a text/make a phone call? D;  But isn't that in the futur-  Welp, that explains that, guys after the Nega Moon (which makes this take place after it)? How do we even know who Hotaru is then? D; Cause she dun' come in until a season after the Nega Moon.  Not impressed; what kind of arch enemy DOESN'T have the power to do stuff with time/space these days? :/  Damn it Setsuna, do your job better! mad  Y-y-you brought her/him/it here for us? D;  Nope just your futuristic cat who knows how to work holograms while we're in the era that even modern man is scratching his head on how to work a VHS player. Which is why you should get a separate computer to store your noods, or even a external hard drive. Wait, what moved? THIS GAME IS SO CONFUSING AND RANDOM! D;  Yeah, yeah, get in line with all the other generic foes. mad  b***h, we have an attack that does 200 dmg a pop (max hit is 999 and keep in mind we just started this game) that hits twice, a little girl with a scythe and a girl who shoots lasers from a mirror, do you really want to mess with us? Thought so.  NO, NOT ARTEMIS'S FURRY COLLECTION, SHE'S GOING TO KILL US ALL! TURN IT OFF, TURN IT OFF!!!! gonk  God damn it, why don't you fight like a man and go for the harder to fight sens-  Welp, we're ******** src="https://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b7/rei_masamune/Sailor Moon Another Story RPG/BisyoujyoSenshiSailorMoon-AnotherStoryJT-Eng240.png" class="user_img" alt="User Image" /> Fun fact: They don't even have Queen Serenity.  "For a lesson in how to be a bad antagonist"  But being a fourteen year old schoolgirl, that means nothing, seeing as we have two university lesbians on our team, one of them being a dirt bike racer who has a jewel encrusted sword that shoots lasers.  Nor do they know ours, we can take one measly Usagi rehash out in one turn!  Haruka: the first person in an RPG to admit that sneaking is for pansies. heart  Two to one, we win, we're going in there and smashing the s**t out of everything, with Hotaru's vote invalid because she'll just bail if she loses, and Luna and Artemis's votes also void because they're ******** cats. mad  Poor sport. mad  Aren't they the greatest couple ever?! 4laugh  You said it! I forgot to take my month old lunch from my locker anyway... -Next chapter: High school all over again, with awkward memories, bad love interests, child-like ways to express love and Mamaru being a pansy not for awhile!
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Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2011 3:54 pm
Chapter 6: Good God, Japanese Architecture is Redundant Ya' know, like every other Sunday when the Senshi decide to take a break and wander about their illusions.  But enemy plans to drug the Senshi for the rest of their lives is boring stuff, let's climb this obelisk of a Junior High School and beat the crap out of them!  Upon raiding the first classroom we see earns us Ami- who is sort of being Shingo'd at the moment.  That's what bedtime is for- or at least before one goes to bed. ninja  Ami's wet dream sort of speak: taking care of children inside of a hospital. gonk I thought she was supposed to be the most normal of the Senshi. D;  But even so, she still apparently wears her school uniform. They could have edited the whole few pixels of it to be a hospital scrub, but effort, effort...  Says Ami during vital organ surgery.  Fun fact: the phone is still very well not picked up. -Long story short, she now has plans to eat out with her Dad- who is some very big doctor irl thus never seeing him and her "husband" and Mom and live happily ever after, why the hell not?  But Usagi not liking anyone but her being happy decides to end this fantasy.  Ooh, I should show you this part! It still makes her useless and can't link, making it even more useless, but yay third tier transformations! The second one is for Chibiusa's inevitable join.  The boss decides to drug us for showing off such a useless item.  And it doesn't go as planned.  I suppose that's a nice thing about the Mooncup, free healing and unlimited use, but no one really dies in this game if you try at least a little bit not to.  So with a couple of laser swords and psychedelic scythe techniques, she goes down without the Senshi losing a single point of HP.  It's Sailor Moon- they're going to get it in the future anyway, so why live it now when you can kick some demon a** to get it later? confused  Well that's good, the inner Senshi would all be brainless without you. = 3=  So naturally being a good friend, we leave her on the floor in a monster infested school when the monster free infirmary is just next door.  Told you. stare Free healing that we don't really ever use, FTW!  Look familiar? surprised Lazy programmers. mad  Cause God forbid, high schoolers need that. When I was in high school, we had cooler signs like "no smoking on school property".  Ooh, look Rei, but in a classroom that looks exactly like the other one, but she's in a different position than Ami! I wonder what she's fantasizing about.  Hell no, she's kind of a d**k.  But, but, she is! D;  Well yeah, I AM the heroine after all, but I'd much rather find a new Sailor Mars first. D< -See: "But thou must" Boss edition.  Awright: 1- You were just begging me to kick your a** two seconds ago and 2: If the last chick couldn't even touch me, yet alone last a round of SPACE SWORD BLASTA! What do you think you can honestly do? Even seeing as I'm not going to waste a turn transforming Usagi into Super Sailor Moon thus two MakeUpLink attacks. Jus' sayin'.  Oh cute, pallet edits!  Okay, I lied, I did transform her into Super Sailor Moon, gotta show you her "ultimate attack" that totally gets outclassed by her MakeUpLinks anyway.  Just like the anime- it's a bunch of hearts and lasers, no rainbows. >: (  And a big explosion in the end. heart  With a pixelated background, that of course means we'll be diving into the depths of Rei's dream.  Her greatest fantasy is Mamoru rejecting her? =o  I KNEW IT! Mamoru is a ***** for more than just Usagi! Rei that whore. mad  Lolchiba, I almost saw that as Chibi.  I think Haruka would like to say something: SPACE SWORD BLASTA! Wake her up for the love of God Usagi! gonk  She is the best friend ever, and the most obeying heroine ever. cool  No, that is Rei, Chibi Mamoru only wears mini skirts in secret with Fiore.  You don't even want to know what she was dreaming about. -cries-  So naturally Rei just conveniently passes out and leaves us to find Minako and Mako-chan on our own. This I don't mind leaving her alone. -Tune in next time for more silly signs, childish love and normal- but weird still love compared to the rest of the Senshi!
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Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2011 3:55 pm
Chapter 7: The Senshi that People Actually Care About @ Sign: But that's like the point of high school! D;  Not wanted to be late for our next class and get busted for loitering, we wander into the next class only to find Makoto.  Totally Rei's dream, that whore. mad  I'm guessing Makoto, not sure. D;  If you don't know who's dream this is, go watch a couple of episodes on Youtube. mad Usagi Minako, yeah! Oh in PGSM (live action Sailor Moon AKA Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon, you totally have to watch some episodes, I was laughing so hard I was crying from the special effects) C'est la vie (which of course is a pun for Sailor V which is a part of her disguise consisting of a mask)  In the mean time, Usagi uses her brain for once and carries Mako-chan away while the "boss" is ranting about dreams.  But carrying the largest inner Senshi (see: The only one who wouldn't die from pneumonia if I hit one of them and missed) out is too much work for Usagi. So the boss catches up in no time and battle assumes.  Finally, someone different with an actual chance to Poison people!  But not so different in that it only took one round of Senshi assault to take him down.  And here we go again! Only with a faceless love interest this time round.  Sounds like a perfect pair with Rei. D<  Poor Makoto, in a country consisting of a shitload of 5'4" and 5'0"s and 130 less lbs, she's an odd one. emo  Seems like a mooch already, is there anyone who can fit the needs of poor Mako-  But she's lovin' that s**t. For those who don't know much about the anime, Makoto is the unfortunate inner Senshi. She has had many breakups, is very tall and strong, both a quality not fit for an inevitable Sailor Moon housewife and she is a master at masking her emotions. Luckily, she's a boss at cooking.  Saving the best for last: Minako! heart  Warp speed running cause the principal isn't here up the ever so redundant hallway leads us directly to Minako.  That looks a lot like Ami, programmers. mad  Venus = Goddess of love and beauty, so naturally Minako's going to be a bit lovey-dovey.  For the billionth and... time? MEEEEEEEEEE! Pfft, soccer is for wusses anyway, by baseball bat spits on his high socks and short shorts. D;  Really? A love letter? Weren't you supposed to do that, sign it anonymously, put it on the stinky kid's desk and run like a p***y like in like Grade 5?  But if anyone is like this chick, she doesn't really give a s**t about love letters and wants some of this goody Sailor Moon RPG.  Then the police in Tokyo must be pretty fruity to give the Senshi outfits and attacks like that. D<  But you're better than her! You shoot lasers with your fingers and chains n' s**t. D;  I like how Usagi doesn't really give a s**t about anyone but her. cool  That's why you're only appearing now? =o  LolJarcock he is exactly what he seems.  A d**k sealed in a jar, thus not able to do much so we shatter that jar and cut him with glass and an intergalactic sword.  They got Chibi-Usa? Why can't she just att- oh yeah, well, let's go save her!  I thought we left you at the temple and pfft, if they're not eaten by now, they'll probably be fine.  Akbar: "It's a trap!" And I'll cliffhanger you here, tune in next time for the inevitable save, child abuse, Mamoru being a pansy and drama bombs!
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Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2011 3:56 pm
Chapter 8: Karma for Mamoru Being a ***** cut last chapter short cause this is a pix heavy part of plot and pseudo saving and dark lasers from Hell.

Did you honestly need to tell us that after going through the same rescue-save scene four times in a row?

Apparently "as usual".

Sorry brah, it's in Crystal Tokyo as said in the Prologue. cool

She does every other episode, so why the hell not?

Or we can just beat the s**t out of you clowns and shake her until she wakes, much like what we've been doing for God knows how long.

DUN DUN DUN.. and b***h, I sleep for twelve hours a day sometimes when I'm really tired, and never died once. X 3 is still under my name as nor have I've fallen into a pit of lava or a big gaping hole in the ground she'll be fine D< .

Damn it Haruka, you lead us here, so get us out of this mess! mad

Says the girl who didn't want to even be here.

And she just wants to conform, so they throw in a line for her here.

Oh for- if you listened to people more, Usagi, you wouldn't be in so many sticky situations! mad mad mad mad mad

She said:

And now we're going to pay dearly for it, that is unless..

Tuxedo Kamen'd!

In theory a time staller so Usagi can gain the balls to blast you all in the face with a razor sharp tiara, but in reality, just Usagi's nine year older than her boyfriend.

He also always makes a gay state the obvious comment when he makes his gay-like appearance via rose throwing every episode.

For the last time Usagi. mad

Cause it's magic and fixes every problem without destroying your face and life.

Something someone should have said to every enemy in Sailor Moon up to now.

And that's all you need to know, because as stated, the Gin-something-su is magic. Oh magic, you are the best plot filler ever!

Must... break... up... with ... Mamoru... and... find... a... less... creepy... lover...

Why didn't do that from the start, or manipulate Haruka to kill everyone? confused

Dream time! Pictured: Perpetual housewife-ness. Not pictured: A sense of dignity.

...to see the wizard the wonderful wizard of Oz!

HEADDESK heart

Now back to making food and driving Chibi-Usa to soccer and gossiping with the local priest's wife.

What now? D;

OH SHI-.

Dark lasers are never good. Unless if it's Haruka shooting them, then they're fabulous. = 3=

Or you could have just pushed everyone out the way you included instead of jumping in front of it. :/ Or better yet, thrown a rose at one of their necks when they were casting the spell of bad plot. :/

If his starts are anything like are's, it was probably like -1 or miss.

Damn it Hotaru! mad

And that is how we end this chapter, minor flesh wound for Hotaru who took the damage like a man and major damage for Mamoru who exploded and is passed out like a Princess in a storybook.
Next chapter- plane tickets, your favourite censored gay couple, having to travel across the world and IRL country namedrops!
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Posted: Fri Jul 01, 2011 1:47 am
Chapter 9: A Classy Way to Plot Things Up and Bust Out Those Unused Graphics! Anyway, last night, laud, lasers, explosions, high school, like normal high school drama, amiryte?  Good to see we're all in agreement. >_> Maybe things like this wouldn't happen if you actually fought major bosses instead of staring at them.  Too late on that one, we already have someone to point fingers at. mad  And it's all Usagi's fault and no one else's! 4laugh  Instead be thankful that Mamoru is down for the count! heart  Replace Hotaru with Minako, you with Rei and add Makoto (because no Setsuna raep yet), and we'll be good to go!  B-but Makoto isn't THAT bad as a fighter. D;  Blame plot convos, they're an inconvenient bunch, I tell ya', making tanks and deathstars freeze in spot, heroines become wusses and people get shot/exploded.  Hey, now that everyone left and Mamoru is 0 HP'd and needs a classy Phoenix Down, and you two are all alone. >_>  Nope, no such luck, so what about the person who actually matters?  Cured by a placing her in the sun for a bit, luckily she didn't end up in a McDonalds in Brazil like how she usually handles damage.  You know, they really should consider building her a room there, it's a pain in the a** to drive her there every other day.  Maybe... instead of laying on the floor, help fight? confused  But Rei, too embarrassed about the whole Mamoru dream busting, changes the subject via "OMGHAXX A GHOST, CALL 911!"  Not you too Ami, we can at least get you some treatment! D;  Not really doing a good job of it now, aren't cha', Kunzite?  Yes, yes they are, he got plot'd by rainbow crystals, as well as his boyfriend Zoisite, it was fabulous!  You were the sneakiest of them all, Nephrite. cool  Sir, if that is the cause, then shouldn't he always be like that? confused I swear, there is no such word as peace in Sailor Moon.  Dark lasers from Hell do that from time to time.  Cause dark energy will just make it worse and neutral energy is as effective as Sailor Mercury. :/  And thus begins the all important question which leads us into the main plot of this game: saving Mamoru's a** from dark lasers from Hell.  Which one, the gin-too-much-Japanese-y-to-easily-memorize that we apparently have, or the futuristic one? Or a whole new one to screw with us?  Kage? What is this? Bushido Blade? From now on, we'll call it the Emo Stone because the Hotaru-Compressed would get stale fast.  Get ready guys, here it comes:  So what do we have to do because they're apparently too lazy to fetch it for us?  Yup, we now have to go to four places in IRL world, oh plot, y u so silly?  And no, no angry Frenchmen or beavers attack you, you're in BC presumably pre-2011 Stanley Cup results, so it's as pictured: boring as ******** src="https://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b7/rei_masamune/Sailor Moon Another Story RPG/BisyoujyoSenshiSailorMoon-AnotherStoryJT-Eng426.png" class="user_img" alt="User Image" /> *wrist flick* Underground glaciers and frozen stuff related.  Laud, this is one crazy lag of the game, I don't even want to spoil what will happen.  Then this one, pallet edits, being forced to play as a shitty character a-plenty.  Because lord knows, we'll never use two for the life of us, so why not get forced to use them?  They get all the fun stuff that would most likely with 100% chance end up with a big killer boss in the end. sad  "After competing in some math competitions to gain the money to get a two way ticket there".  "After robbing a bank"  "Because they're just begging for tourists, so it's practically free!"  "Because I'm part singer, so I just have the fund, you guys are ghettoooooo!"  And plot and going around the world four times.  Oh cute, we even have to use Chibiusa- the worst of the playable characters at one point in this!  I got mine out- via LP, you got yours? Next chapter- everyone magically gains money to fly across the world and being forced to play as a shitty (but at least respectable) character a-plenty.
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Posted: Fri Jul 01, 2011 2:12 am
Chapter 10: What the Swiss are Hiding From Us Might as well get the hard stuff out of the way first the game says, so we start with Miss Mizuno.  Right, so she isn't that bad, having the right to boast highest Def/Evd rate in the game meaning she'll only get hit (if ever) with 1s and 2s if set up correctly, but the game is more along the lines of "BEAT THE s**t OUT OF THE ENEMY BEFORE IT CAN EVER MOVE!" so naturally, who needs those two stats if you don't even use it 90% of the time? To aid this, we pile Atk + accessories on her, so she can OHKO every enemy she encounters (hopefully).  Your worst nightmare: a Sailor Mercury solo. D;  Ya' don't say, and the Pacific Ocean is pretty deep, the more you know.  Well, let's meet some of the locals.  Ami! No need to be so racist!  So she does what all geniuses to and...  Jumps off the mountain, why the hell not?  Not even shitting you, but she's a Senshi of magical powers!  Just a little, now hold on while I jump off this tower.  Lord knows how long later, we end up here, in a man's house under the blankets, oh dear.  Not even a "How are you feeling from jumping off the biggest mountain in all of Europe?" Why I never! mad  As pictured, Ami doesn't like creepy men who can speak Japanese apparently (or Ami can speak Swiss, or whatever they speak there), so alias it is!  Then why is there light coming in through the window? Huh? confused  Oh dear, apparently, we're not the only girl he's keeping in his beds. gonk  Zoicite's a boy though! D; and since when were we looking for a cave? I thought we were looking for a stone. -blank stare-  Umm, last time we checked, her face was blue.  Zoicite's stone or not, a spelunking we will go then if it has treasure!  This IS an RPG. mad  Even in the remote ice glaciers do the Japanese still dominate the shops.  That's a good thing then, piled with Bracelets (+ Atk) she's an unstoppable tank/deathstar!  She's kind of... not.. there I think. sweatdrop  OH GOD, IT'S A ZOMBIE! gonk  Pictured: Two seconds ago him telling me NOT to leave the village.  Upon offering some medicine Ami was just conveniently carrying around with her, he then goes on to say that this is plot illness that some guy named Dr. Schwartz can only heal.  No world map needed or anything, just three or so steps chocked full of enemies.  Right, so in battle, Ami has the ability to... shoot bubbles, shoot bubbles, and...  Summon a big ******** tsunami, so naturally, we do that while she wears bracelets on every bit of arm she has.  Good God, someone must've gotten mad at that puzzle we've been collecting for pieces to end up in Switzerland. =o  -Doesn't make a masturbation joke here.-  If you study Ami's wrists, yes, yes they can.  Inconvenient'd!  Seeing as your and the neighbouring town sold Japanese food, I don't see why she'd look funny. mad Tune in next chapter for *****, accessory breaking to break even Ami, and back to why we're even in Switzerland in the first place!
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Posted: Fri Jul 01, 2011 2:14 am
Chapter 11: Uh, You Mean This Isn't Zoicite's Cave but a Creepy Man's? So with nothing left to do, we sort of head off the only way we can and come across a really linear cave, excited and overjoyed about finding this stone, we end up here.  You're not aloud to capslock, you're the shy one. mad  Unique sprite in a lab coat? In a hidden lab no doubt?  Uh, you should hide your hidden lab better, it's like ten steps north of the villages. :/ Oh, and tsunamis, she basically made half of Switzerland underwater getting here.  Oh my. gonk  Not legal if that's what you're thinking. D; D; D;  Which is weird because the Stars (final season) was set when the inner Senshi just started high school.  In theroy, yes, but we saved him from a train, never to be seen again.  And I think we now know part of why this game wasn't localized. D;  FREEZE HIM! FREEZE HIM!  After we cover this point of the plot that is. = 3=  Fun fact: there's even more fiercer youma inside this cave.  So Ami decides to help this poor ol' bugger to safety anyway. I tell ya', Schwartz, one wrong move and you'll find yourself trapped under a big sheet of ice and frozen tsunami. mad  So we raid his s**t and in turn find the equivalent of what the Sword of Malice meant to Ragnar in his chapter if you get my riff (only a bit sooner, dammit Ragnar -fist shake- )  So yeah, stat ups in everything including Atk and Spd? Also, bear in mind I'm replacing the Bracelet with this already, so the Atk boost is way more than what is shown.  A bit further north, in case Ami isn't broken enough for you yet: (oh dear, I couldn't find that stats for it as I must've not taken a picture, but it's Atk + with a higher Spd increase which is a major fap because Ami is slow n' tanky anyway.)  And guess who is going to be in charge to get it?  She needs to test out her pimp ring and earrings anyway. 4laugh  Hans also comes, but doesn't do anything, but doesn't get in the way, so no skin off our death water Senshi's back anyway.  A whole screen north past the village and a hallway leads us here: seriously, no cool dungeons worthy of a screenshot yet. D;  As Ami sits there cooly with her arms crossed making him do all the work for making her go through all of this. cool  But Hans is a putz and somehow made that wall explode revealing a hidden entrance. It's better not to ask, just go with the flow.  As the timewarp once told me: "Another step to your r-i-i-ight." :/  And the world is saved from another case of apparently "plot-coma" where one can take as long as they would like and the person would still not die from whatever ails them.  We're saved! Nice knowin' ya Hans, we could care less about you now.~  But RPG + pedestal don't go hand in hand, Ami has to earn that from someone's bloody corpse, not take it and frolic!  I knew you shouldn't have caused so many tsunamis!  And there goes Zoicite's stone, don't you just love inconvenience? RPG plot at its finest. heart  I'll save you from a "But thou must" and agree.  And the last batch of it on this mountain of course.  I'm sure I could have set frameskip to 9 and tested your theory. :/  And did you in blowing up that wall somehow, but who cares about you now?  After successfully using him, he gets ninja'd by her to continue her search for the Hi Stone in that big gaping hole.  No sooner does the doctor interrupt, shove some leafs down her throat, curing her instantly.  Always pessimistic, that one. Truth is she's just being dramatic and doesn't want to see Hans ever again, why the hell not? Next chapter: Okay, okay, plot I guarantee, karma on one of the doom laser girls, redundancy and tl;dr dungeons of long, winding corridors.
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Posted: Fri Jul 01, 2011 2:15 am
Chapter 12: Oh Shi- Antagonist Outta Nowhere! Why can't you just jump down then? You did it before. =o  Hmm, I wonder where these stairs located like three steps left go?...  Well, this is a pretty exciting dungeon...  After traversing many loops and "U" shaped mania, we end up at a savepoint. Boss tiem!  After a couple of more exciting "U"'s, that is where one gets into a random encounter every five steps or so, which Ami has pimped out Spd, and Atk so she demolishes everything in first move without ever being hit.  Glitter + Zoicite, do I even need to go into details?  I thought her arch enemy was going to be Murduk! D<  If by dead, you mean a whole - 2 HP, two hits being lucky shots, then sure.  HA! WE KNOW YOUR NAME ANYWAY! Jesus Jose, she's a giant.  She has around 250 HP by the way.  Lol.  Never underestimate the power of Physics kids!  Yes, you shall call her Ami-sama now, and put strong emphasis on the sama. cool  Second form boss? Oh you b***h! mad  But before we bother with that, we have to pull a Xenogears and pull a big plot bomb that takes forever to fold out just so if you die, you have to watch it all over again. trollface.jpg  Yes, but why? confused  And some blue haired nobody on the streets will? =o  OH GOD, TALKING DEMONIC BUSH! gonk  But but, internet!  That sounds as legit, "hey kids, I know the answer of the Imperium Silver Crystal, it's in the trunk of my van; get in!"  And with that, Nabu takes the bait of the ***** and gets tractor beam'd into the back of this hooded figure's van.  Fun fact: The Ginzuishou is in Japan safely tucked in Usagi's breasts/locket, all Ami has is Zoicite's Hi Stone.  Nonetheless: Round 2: FIGHT!  Oh, your defence is sassy this time around. 4laugh  @ Makers of this game: If you want a second form boss to be tougher than first, do more than just give her a higher Def rank. :/  And drowned you twice may I add, and clawed you to death when she ran out of EP.  Yeah, yeah, excuses excuses, just finish her, Ami.  -Doesn't make reference something that he doesn't want to even bring up-  Third form?! b***h please, unless you do something about that Atk, I'll bust out the EP healing items in battle to drown you more. mad  And with that, she runs away like a pansy, gives Ami the Kage Stone and did nothing but waste her time.  But that's good, the whole population here are either *****, blue faced or racist. D;  But you just said three seconds ago that- fuuuuuu...  And spectacularly may I add without a single healing item use. 3nodding Bonus Content: This is Ami in the live action Sailor Moon (and about the approximate same face she made when she learned that Nabu had a second form), isn't she a qt? On the show, Ami is portrayed as a quiet type who is only overcoming her fear of people. Also, her Mother is a doctor always on business trips to Europe, and she doesn't live with her Father, so she's always alone. She also demonstrates skill with a sword which is sort of hot. redface Next Chapter: Rei's chapter, with monks n' s**t, and yet another creepy man. PS: If the -1 dmg wasn't enough to make you love Ami as well as her cute rage face, Here you go~, running s**t over with cars and badassery included.
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