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Gabrian was sure that people would ask him what had happened during their field trip. They would want to know what they'd been doing the past few weeks, and yet... the nix would probably only be able to stare at them blankly. There was just no way he'd be able to handle telling anyone what had happened on that Jack forsaken island. His parents would want to know, and all he could think to tell them was that he couldn't really remember; that he'd likely fallen over at some point, hit his head on a rock, and thus, forgotten the whole experience.

Granted, that was a lie. He knew it, and he knew his parents would know it, but he was also sure they wouldn't ask anything else; they wouldn't have the heart to ask their son what it was that was troubling him in such horrible ways. He could still distinctly recall feeling dead, or rather, simply not entirely alive, floating above the island, looking down. Even as he materialised through the portal and was herded back so he could be transported back to the school grounds, Gabrian still couldn't make heads or tail of what it was he'd seen. There was too much information, too many questions and not enough answer. There was also not enough willpower or strength to actually put two and two together; he just didn't care. All he wanted to do was curl up and sleep for a week.

Wait, no. That wasn't right. That's not what he wanted. Not right now anyhow.

His head suddenly turned, even as he heard Hellma and Arel's voices, telling them where it was they had to go, and he found himself seeking out the familiar faces of his friends. Unfortunately, he recognized no one in the sea of faces and heads; there were too many of them and by the time he reappeared, back upon campus grounds, he was so relieved by the sudden feeling of FEAR around him that he practically forgot to look around. When he did though, he was overwhelmed; all around him, students hugged, cried and stumbled back to their dorms, and though his first instinct was to head towards the demon dorms himself... he stopped after the first step.

He frowned though, shaking his head. No, that wasn't what he wanted. What Gabrian really wanted was to check on his friends, starting with Ren, whom was the one he'd seen die before he'd been.... but no, he wasn't going to think about that. Not now.

Instead, the nix stumbled towards the monster dorms, feeling like his legs refused to work like they should have. Perhaps it was a side effect of going without FEAR for so long, only to be assaulted by it upon his arrival to Halloween, or perhaps it was just the fact he was so relieved he was alive he wasn't entirely sure how to handle it. Whatever the reason... when he reached the dorm, he was practically forced to bring his right hand out and walk alongside the wall, dragging said hand along it's surface for support. Thankfully though, he was quite familiar with the corridors and he made his way to his destination with no problem what so ever, aside from a light stumble here and there.

When he arrived, the door to Ren's room was open, and he vaguely wondered why this was so; he knew the gryphon had little care for his privacy, but this was a bit much. Upon spotting his friend, kneeling on the floor, half flopped on the bed though, he realized it had less to do with not caring for his privacy, and more to do with the fact he'd just stumbled into his room and collapsed without so much as a care in the world, because he was alive.

Taking care to shut the door behind him, allowing the soft click to announce his presence for him, the demon approached the bed, but rather than sit on it, he knelt on the floor, a hand reaching out to land on the gryphon's head, "Hey..." nothing else would come out just yet; just that one word. He had no idea what else to say; no way to convey the many swirling thoughts and feelings within him, so he'd settled with the first thing that'd come to mind, "I missed you. You left before I did," a small shudder, "You're not allowed to do that again."

It was fascinating, how used Gabrian was becoming to being greeted by the gryphon in such a manner. Had anyone stopped and told him this would become the norm when he'd first met Ren, it was likely that someone would have received a sneer of contempt for their efforts. Who'd have thought it would ever be possible? Sure not Gabrian himself, at any rate. After all, he'd pretty much prepared himself for a very long, rather lonely school year, given the fact he'd not been particularly willing to form any sort of lasting bond with those around him. Apparently, fate loved irony and it had other plans for him though; any other time or place and the demon might have laughed at the realization. As it was, however... he just couldn't muster up the strength or willpower. He figured it had to do with the fact he'd been nearly starving when he'd arrived on school grounds and he was still sort of getting used to feeling his arms, legs and body working for him.

Not even his mind, which he'd kept in 'death', was entirely functional at this point, and the nix was more than slightly aware of the fact when his first thought upon being embraced was something along the lines of 'I could get used to this', followed by 'Soft... warm'. It was around then that he decided to do the equivalent of a mental kick in hopes his mind would begin to operate in some resemblance of usefulness, and thus how he managed to catch the whispered sentence.

"I'm sorry."

His mind was telling him that those words were the logical, normal response to what he'd stated just moments earlier, but his instincts were telling him otherwise. There was something wrong with Ren's words; something that he could just barely see when he tried to scrape over the surface, and had he been perfectly lucid, it wouldn't have taken him as long as it did to recognize the guilt that laced those two words. Guilt? For what? What was Ren even guilty of? Still moving mostly on instinct as he tried to figure out what his friend meant, the nix's arms moved; one to steady the gryphon against him, the other to hold himself up by clutching the side of the bed. After all, given the fact Ren was pushing all his weight onto him, gripping him like he thought he'd vanish, it was only normal he'd need to sustain both their weights up, "Sorry for what?" it took him a few beats to realize he'd said that out loud, but given the fact he'd started, the demon pushed onward, trying to get the answers he needed out of the other boil, "I... get the impression you're not apologizing for going on before me," he was well aware he was implying he'd followed shortly after (in fact, he was pretty sure he'd followed scarce three minutes after the gryphon had vanished), but at this moment in time, he didn't care.

"What are you sorry for?" there was a beat as he patted the other boil's back, a gesture he recalled his sister performing on him whenever he'd had a bad dream, "You did nothing wrong. Whatever you think it is that you did wrong... it's not true," and then, because he felt the need to drive in that message through the other boil's thick, thick skull, he let go of the bed and attempted to raise his head to he could look him in the eye. Gabrian made sure Ren was looking at him before repeating in a slow, steady tone, "You did nothing wrong.

Attached didn't even begin to scrape through surface of what Gabrian knew he'd become, and while the notion was vaguely scary due to the fact he hadn't been prepared for it... the other sensations his feelings brought along were more than welcome. Granted, it was true that the attachments hurt; he still distinctly remembered the fear he'd felt when he'd seen Ren fall overboard not once, but twice during their trip to the island. He could still feel the stabbing pain he'd experienced during the hallucinations the island had bestowed upon him (because they were only just that; hallucinations, and clearly not the truth in any sort of way) and the strange bittersweet swell he'd felt when LW had come back to join them from only Jack knew where. Not even Alessa, whom he'd never even figured he'd actually come to see as a friend was safe for him to be around. When the nagual had rushed into the cornfield, screaming his name, the demon had rushed after her despite the fact his instincts told him it was a bad idea to go in there.

All in all, he was too far gone to recover. The emotional scars would probably remain there forever, but at the end of the day... wasn't that what made it all worthwhile? Wasn't that what made people matter? It was true they could hurt him, but it was also true they brought him immense joy. The good more than balanced out the bad; in fact, if he were to take a moment to be entirely sincere, Gabrian would have to admit that even despite all he'd gone through... despite all he now knew, if he ever had a chance to relive it all, he'd not change a thing.

The knowledge he now held pained him, and he knew he'd have to confront it, not to mention actually sit down to talk with LW about it. He didn't particularly look forward to that confrontation; he was good at verbal banter, but this? These were deeper water and he wasn't all that confident he'd manage to swim in them, even with his innate abilities where water was concerned. At the notion, his hand curled around Ren's clothes ever so slightly, a frown crossing his features. But no. Not now. Not today. Not this week either. He'd cross that bridge when he got to it and not a moment sooner. He had to first allow himself and his friends to recover from the island experience, and then tackle that once he'd prepared himself mentally. And grabbed ice cream. Something told him he was going to want to drown in it after he was done with this.

Gabrian was pulled out of his inner mussing when Ren leaned away from him, looking... there was no word to describe what the demon saw upon his friend's features. Fear? Guilt? Sheer terror? All of the above? It was hard to tell, given the fact the gryphon refused to look at him. By the time he spoke up, the nix had managed to lowered himself into a seating position, his back leaned against the bed for support as his hand lay useless on his lap.

There was a long beat of silence as he watched the other boil, and then, he did the only thing he could think of doing; he smiled. It wasn't a joyful smile though, nor was it a mocking smile; if there were one word that could have been used to describe the demon's smile, it would have been heartbreakingly sad. He just didn't know what to say to comfort his friend, because he was feeling something similar to what the other boil was feeling and wasn't sure anyone could have said anything to make him feel any better at the current moment. He raised one of his hands in the air, his palm facing the other boil in a pathetic imitation of a highfive pose, and then he fisted the hand up, unsure if Ren would understand, but figuring it was worth a shot.

Words seemed useless, but he tried anyways, "You're an idiot," it was murmured, "But not for the reasons you think you are," he swallowed and then looked away briefly, "You weren't alone," another beat as he tried to get the words out, though it was clear he was having trouble, "Because I followed right after you. I didn't even have time to figure out what was happening. I'm just glad you didn't see it too."

When Ren's knuckles brushed his own, the demon's smile changed ever so slightly; the sadness seemed to drain away from it, leading way to something else. It was a brightness that seemed to reach his eyes, if only for a moment before it vanished. He felt the other boil's fingers curl around his fist and a small sigh escaped his lips. There was no reason for him to repeat his words, given the fact Gabrian was well aware the gryphon had heard him the first time. Instead, he simply explained further, "After you..." he paused and swallowed, his eyes lowering to the floor, his hands following suit till they rested on his lap once more, "After you left... something happened somewhere on the upper floor. I don't know what it was, and frankly, I don't really care all that much," finally, he raised his head, catching his friend's gaze with his own, "The ceiling came down upon us and I was just... I was too slow," he stopped there, feeling his throat tighten up at the mere thought of it.

In a way, he'd been much luckier than Ren had, seeing as how he had not felt that much pain. Or rather, he had, but in a sense... it'd been over before it'd even begun. One moment he'd been in that underground lab, and the next he'd been floating above it all, unable to make heads or tails of what he saw, "I floated and there were..." his face twisted in confussion, "Children. There was no fog," his eyes sought out Ren's even as the other boil pulled away and stood on his feet, "There was no fog," and he wasn't even sure what that meant aside that maybe he was slightly insane. Or a lot insane; he was still trying to decide which it was.

His gaze followed the gryphon as he stumbled towards the door, and the nix made a half hearted attempt to stand up, but failed and collapsed back down into the previous sitting position; he was just so tired. His body demanded he curl up somewhere and sleep for a few weeks to recover both physically and mentally from the stress the field trip had caused him, and yet his mind refused to shut down or obey, "I..." a sigh followed the single word, "I'm going to need a little bit of help, Ren," he wasn't even sure how it was the other boil could stand on his feet and move freely without collapsing on the floor, "Please? I don't know why, but I feel like I could sleep for a year... I had trouble getting here. Lend me a hand?" he lifted a hand up in the air and then snorted, "I don't think my mind is even working like it should, because when you hugged me, the first things that popped into my mind were 'warm and soft'. Not... 'Happy you're safe' or 'You're alive', no no.... warm and soft. Then came the other notions."

In fact, something at the very back of his mind was telling him he should shut up, right about now, and so he snapped his mouth shut, frowned, looked around the room confused and then turned back to Ren. It was almost as if it'd only just dawned on him that the ghouls weren't there. After all... why shouldn't they be there? They should have been there, safe and happy, and this should have all been a bad, bad, horrible nightmare that they had all shared, "I... don't know where they are. I left them alone," that strange sadness came back, but this time it was not accompanied by a smile.

This time... it was just pain and sadness, with nothing to counter it.

Confusion. A lost feeling. Lack of understanding. They were all very present in the she-wolf's mind. What was going on? Why...Was this part of that dream-like feeling of being dead? Dead. That was what she was. Or had been? Still was? She didn't know. Her mind was still the same tortured mess and could barely grasp the fact that there were many students gathered around. Or that they were being ushered towards a portal. A working portal. And there were too many students around for it to be just the survivors.

I'm...not...dead? Not dead. Alive...

There was some pushing and shoving as everyone made their way through the portal. LW just moved on autopilot, not fully there or believing any of this yet. It had to be some horrid nightmare that was meant to drive them to complete insanity. It had to be! Something too good to be true couldn't be real.

It was the familiar sight and scents that first began to war with her fractured brain. They were so familiar and soothing. How could a nightmare get the scents just right? The small little things that one normally wouldn't think of? The cool ground beneath her feet was solid and REAL. Candlejack. She was alive! And home. Back at the school. Territory she knew. Loved (to a degree). Someplace she had dearly missed and hoped to return to. And now, here she was. Back home. But...would home be the same? Were the others back too?

Her mind shied away from those thoughts. Not yet. She had to see for herself that this was truly real. There were students scattering all over, heading back to their respective dorms or forming groups to sob and share the joy of being home with your closet friends there with you. Closest friends... She had to find them. See their faces. Know that this wasn't all a dream. But what if it was? What if she was still floating back in that 'Other' space. Alone. No serpent. No gryphon. No rabbit. Just...alone. No. NO!

The she-wolf took one hesitant step and felt something inside her threaten to shatter again. It was strange, feeling her legs after the time she spent...not in the physical world. Said legs didn't seem to want to respond either. They were shaky, like a newborn pup testing out its feet for the first time. And her tail. Even her tail didn't seem to want to move properly. A strangled sound tried to escape and before she would let it overcome her, LW reached for that other half of herself. Fear gripped her that it wouldn't come and that she'd have her proof this wasn't real. But crimson fur slid over her skin as senses intensified and limbs rearranged to accommodate the new form. She gave a violent shake of her fur, feeling it bristle and relax, before bolting on four feet in a random direction. The she-wolf pushed herself to her limits in speed, feeling exhausted muscles groan in protest as her eyes blurred. This was real. The wolf was real. And that meant she really was home. Home!

Her pace slowed as a scent drew her attention towards it, subconsciously at first until her fractured mind was able to focus on it. LW's heart all be dropped as she recognized that scent. With another burst of speed the she-wolf ran towards the scent, feeling herself crumble piece by piece. She was going back the way she'd just come (mostly just come) and violet eyes scanned all around until she spotted the form she was looking for. LW barely hit on the brakes as she slid to a stop and shifted all at once, all but collapsing into the lap of her friend.

"ALESSA!" LW couldn't keep the hysteria out of her voice. Oh Jack she hoped that Alessa hadn't experienced what she had. Felt what it was like to die. "I...I'm..." LW couldn't formulate her words and she buried her head against the nagual's shoulder, tail curling around them both. I'm sorry I left you. It rang through her mind yet she couldn't get the words out. Nor could she focus on the question that kept rising up in the back of her mind. Where was Gabrian? And...Ren?

She was real! This wasn't a dream. No dream could get Alessa's scent right. Or her reactions. The small things. LW clung to her friend tightly, not caring if the nagual held her too tightly. Just being able to feel the sensation again was...well LW couldn't find the words to express how great it felt. It had been devastating not being able to feel ones body when she died. Died. And left Alessa. One of her best friends.

"J-Jack! I-I'm so...sorry...Alessa." The she-wolf all but sobbed. She had left her. Hadn't been strong enough to stay by her friend's side. Though she had tried. Jackdamnit she had tried. But in the end, it hadn't been enough. Alessa is alive, though! That was good enough for the she-wolf now.

LW wasn't sure how long it actually took for some of the hysteria to die down a little, but being able to breathe in the scent of the rabbit, feel her clinging right back, know that she was solid and there helped immensely. The she-wolf hoped that it she was helping Alessa in the same way. The two of them desperately needed one another. And the boils... Thought of them made her grip tighten slightly on the ghoul. They...where were they?

"Th-The....b-boils?" She asked hoarsely, afraid to hear the answer. Were they here? Alive? Back home? Oh Jack! They had to be. Just had to be. LW wouldn't accept any other answer. Couldn't accept any other one.

Ren....Gabrian...