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 Posted: Wed Mar 23, 2011 3:53 pm
 She felt wrong and she knew why the issue had been bugging her since her first mistake. Why had she fallen for Pavi and gotten into the mess she was in now? Did she have to show him her face..?? What made her feel something for him she felt distant from him now as if he was miles away that was because he was..Since that day she had not seen him he had made a promise but what had happened to it? She hated herself for everything wishing she had listened to her brother and found a life mate not some..someone who would leave when the foals were born. Her heart had grown colder then it was even though deep down she fit something for him her feelings were blocked out at the thought of him leaving. She though they would be happy well..Not slightly she had planed to leave when the foals were born that was why she could not understand how she felt..Was it harder for him to leave then for her? She sighed shaking her mane out her cold glowing eyes staring at the ground from under her mask. If she met him again she would else this all the false hopes he had given her gave her more reason to make him suffer for his crimes..
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Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2011 7:34 pm
He was watching her silently from the shadows of the trees, frowning sadly to himself. It was the first time in a long time that he felt pure, uninterrupted sadness. He saw her motions and expressions, her thoughts made into matter. She was so depressed looking, and he was so very afraid it was his fault, that he was the cause for her heart ache. Even if he wasn't, how he was hiding in fear, watching her obviously in pain, was nearly just as bad. Why didn't he run straight up to her and try and comfort her? He was sickened with himself, because he knew the answer. He just didn't want to bring himself to think it while he looked at her, even though nothing had been on his mind other than the very thought he was trying to repress. Tybalt. His heart lightened when he pictured the huge stallion, and the guilt leaped back on it to weigh it down.
Taking a steadying breath, he moved towards her. His heart wasn't telling his mind what he was about to do or say, and he preferred it that way. It was probably easier that way. He ignored the thought that swam to the surface, before he cleared his throat to let her know she wasn't alone anymore.
The thought was but not easier for her...
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Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2011 5:25 am
She heard it first the crunching of leaves she quickly whipped around eyes studying the bushes and trees around her. She had heard something something that sounded like Pavi..was she hearing things now? Why had this gotten to her so much? Because she wished to live happy when when she knew she cold not from the start? Possibly because things were spinning out of her control she thought they would be happy at least for sometime have foals and then part but this..? No he had found someone else and had not been told her walked away without explaining himself that was why she was so frustrated. He had somewhat tricked her into loving him by puting on a false face pretending to care when all he would do was leave her and never look back. She snorted ready to stare him down and lash out at him all she could.
"I know your there promise breaker..Dont tell you yor excuses dont even try to explain i know all to well your kind...You are one who was trying to be one they were not...Who have lied and cheated now i will make you feel how i do.."
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Posted: Tue Jun 14, 2011 6:41 pm
He swallowed thickly, his white fur breaking the darkness that the trees created. His white pelt shown brightly, his equally bright eyes brighter than usual. They swam with tears that threatened to fall over their bridge and soak into his fur. In a quivering voice, Pavitra smiled weakly. "You wont have to try hard, love." He stopped about four yards from her, not knowing if he should proceed. "but first... I am not, and would never be a cheater, nor a liar. I wont give you explanations of my absence if that is what you wish, though.." he fell silent, watching her intently. His chest cavity felt heavy with turns of water, sloshing around with each breath, and gaining even more weight the more he stared at her. He was dreadful. Despicable. He loved Adalyn, in his own way... but he knew it wouldn't be enough. The silence sliced at him and he took a breath to say something, but the water permitted not words passed his throat. He closed his eyes, and jaw with an audible noise, turning his head downward and away. He was so ashamed.
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Posted: Tue Jun 14, 2011 6:53 pm
She stood there frozen staring at the ground not wanting to see his face at the moment. Her glowing eyes brighter than ever her anger rising up from within but she still felt it the beating of her heart she could not control when she got close to him it still remained even if she tried to convince herself she hated him. Her heart told the truth she still loved him but if she was going to leave him she had to convince herself she hated him or else her heart would ache forever from the pain of loosing him. Pretending to hate him was better than to love him.
"My words are harsh like they are meant to be..It seems its already happening..." her voice is cold with no emotion at all "No matter if you are those things or not you left me without telling me where you were going..that has lead me to believe you really are doing things behind my back..I would like to hear what you were doing if you would be so kind as to share" all the compassion is gone from her voice now its ice cold with hints of menace and a tone of joking but not a very good kind.
She felt horrible inside having to do this to him watching herself tear him down but there was no other way it had to be done when she left she would make up for this she would embrace him and whisper to him but all she could do now was watch him both there hearts breaking. He would never be enough for her she would admit that but she would never forget him she had no idea how they could have foals after a talk like this but she hopped and planned it would still come to pass. she watched him turn away hanging her head it was her fault she was the deceiving one
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Posted: Tue Jun 14, 2011 8:22 pm
What was wrong with him? What had he done? He had promised her happiness and he'd dropped the ball nearly immediately. Steeling himself, Pavitra looked up at her with a fierceness in his eyes he'd never felt shine through. "Adalyn." Each syllable carried a weight greater than gravity. "I've been wandering a little was east. I've been with a stallion some, and a pregnant mare another." His voice was gravely and hoarse with emotion and the strain he was putting on his throat. Obviously by the way he said "pregnant mare" with a flat tone, he had no affection for her other than what he'd feel for anyone in particular. "I've been flying in the starry sky. I've been running through the wasteland fields covered in snow. I've been hiding." Tears escaped, and he took a hard step forward, the dirt floating upward. "I've been hiding from my responsibilities, and trying to escape into false realities." He visually flinched at the hidden thought of what he viewed Tybalt under neath it all. Like Ty could ever have feelings for him? He scoffed at the thought, but his eyes never wavered from Adalyn. It hurt so bad, but thats what he thought when he looked at Adalyn. Like it was so wrong to hope for that when someone so clearly was hurting because of him. He wouldn't do it anymore. No, Tybalt would have to sink with Raj in his heart... it burned and ripped but he would have to suffer it. He'd repair this mare before him, like he was supposed to do.
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Posted: Wed Jun 15, 2011 6:17 am
She looked up she heard something in his voice she had no heard yet..it sound like could that even be compassion? She looked him in the eyes and she saw a flame burning there she could see he was determined to do something but what could that be..? was he trying to win her back after he broke her heart? "Pavi.." she continues to stair at him her expression still blank her glowing eyes staring into his. "Wandering.." she laughs and hufs when she hears to other parts "So you go off without telling me behind my back go off with some other mare and a stallion?? This is what you did in that time?? How did i ever trust you!!!" he was with another! he had gone being her back and cheated he probably had what 3 kids and another mare??? why had he broken the loved they shared? the commitment they made to at least be true to one another till there foals came. Where did it get so out of control!
She thhoguth she hears strain in his voice like he regretted his choice but if he wanted her now she would be so easy to fally back into his arms. She was better without him she was convincing herself eh would never need him again trying to stop her heart from beating for him. "i thought we promised to be true to one another! To love one another for who we are!!!! Never to go off and if we did we would tell the other!" she turns her back on him now taking in the rest of his story. "Youve been hiding..? What for..why would you hide from me.." her tone of voice shows pain and it betrays her just for the moment she cant imagine why he would want to hide from her or even life. she saw him start crying his emotions winning she felt the urge to comfort him but she forced herself to stay there her eyes to the ground now. "Hiding from what you know is right..? I have been waiting for you i was waiting here to break your heart but it seems i already have this is far from over though.." she sighs and looks up at him "if you want me back you have to promise me..you will never do something this foolish again and we can be loving as a couple should..till after we have baskets and they are full grown" she wanderers over to him and wonders what he is thinking he should know what he did was wrong you cannot have more than one mate at a time..you must be ture to your current even if it is not more than a fling. "it will not be easy to win me back Pavi my heart has grown cold over the days you were gone..the days you were hiding from life..trying to escape it trying to fly to a better place..i can feel you pain..but i have been wating here for you..please dont make me wait any longer i cant bear the fact of you leaving again for another behind my back..or even if you did tell me..i cant take that again"
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Posted: Wed Jun 15, 2011 9:15 am
He didn't care what she said--he has a chance at that was more than he'd hoped for. He lunged the distance between them and wrapped his thick neck over top hers and pulled her close. This wings folded forward, enclosing her with white feathers. "Adalyn, Adalyn, Adalyn." he cooed in her ears, as if she were a foal herself. Foals... she wanted a family to love, and that's what she deserved. Foals to love her undoubtedly...better than him. That's what she needed. When she had them, he would be unneeded... he dared not let the errant thought of Tybalt flash by, but it was there... waiting where he could feel the pain dully throbbing. That was a part of him now, just like with Raj. It would always be there, but he would ignore it the best he could... at least until he was alone.
He bent his head back and tilted his snout to hers. "My sweet Adalyn." He stared into her eyes--- both of theirs were unique. One's solid white, the other, black but glowing blue. Their children will certainly be unique. Smile at the idea, he continued to stare into her.
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Posted: Wed Jun 15, 2011 2:48 pm
She was caught off guard at the sudden rush of moment she saw him running to her then all she saw was white. She frantically looked around to realize she was inside of one of his wings.. what was he thinking? she stood there though trying to decide weather to give him one last chance or leave him now before her heart re-opened to him. She sighed breathing in the sent on his feathers the sent of the wild and unknown. she heard him say her name several times in a voice that was more than loving she felt something inside her stir she could not keep the wants of her heat at bay. She moved closer to him still covered by the wing pressing herself up on his side closing her eyes breathing deeply. He seemed to understand her now she was till not fully trusting him but she would give him credit for trying to win her back it was working.
She felt his nose on her face and as she opened her eyes she found herself looking into his pupiless white eyes. "Pavi.." she could not let herself say more than his name not yet at least but she did have one thng to say "Have you realized how much we need each other? How did you feel when you were away from me?"
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Posted: Wed Jun 15, 2011 3:01 pm
He flinched gently at her question. He remembered the days he spent with Tybalt, how happy he was, and how nice it was to be with Etain, and her prospective foals. How nice it was to be himself, with out worrying about anything else. But that wasn't him. He shouldn't have ran, he shouldn't have left her alone. "I felt... not myself." He settled on that answer. It was the best to go with, for the sake of her heart, and his own. "You need me just as much as I need you." He smiled sweetly, adding in his head to remind me of who I am.
"Am I forgiven, my beautiful Adalyn?" He nuzzled her, what the humans called 'eskimo kisses'.
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Posted: Wed Jun 15, 2011 3:12 pm
"While you were gone i was on a quest to find the meaning of my life..the entire time i kept thinking of you..i met some others to but i would never dream of leaving you for them.." she knew that was partly true but after she and Pavi were parted in the future she knew just who she was going to run to but of course hopefully Pavi would still love her in some way or another.. "I feel whole again..we will need each other for however long our love lasts..and possible after that to..fate links us in odd ways sometimes" she half heartily smiles back at him wanting to desperately take him back but how could she ever put her full trust in him again? "If you dont make the same mistakes as before i do forgive you..holding a grudge does nothing but make matters worse" she relaxes some when he nuzzles her and she in return puts her head in his mane and makes a motion so her mask falls off and her hair falls over her face. "Do tell me i wont regret doing this again"
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Posted: Wed Jun 15, 2011 8:18 pm
"My sweetest, I'll do everything in my power so that you will have nothing to ever regret while with me." His voice was a deep and earnest, even though it wasn't barely as loud as a breath. He smiled, his eyes squinting slightly. "You're too beautiful, Adalyn." He murmured, "Out side and in." Focusing all of his effections for Adalyn wasn't hard, per say... he did care deeply for her, that was the easy part. The hard part was letting everyone else float down. He promised himself he'd let them return when ever his time with Adalyn was done. He knew they weren't soul mates, no... someone would know that with out a doubt. But he did know he would love her, and she would be one of the most prominent figures in his life.
"No.. what shall we do?" He winked, abruptly turning around, his wings spread wide, a smile lighting his face once more.
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Posted: Thu Jun 16, 2011 7:13 am
"I hope you will..I will move on now and forget what you have done..now its up to you..you must change my heart again make sure i never regret" she nods at him though wonders why his voice is almost at a whisper she notices him brighten up for a moment. "Only you would say that..perhaps it is true" she looks up at him and pushes all her hate aside and tries to allow herself to love him once more. She smiles to him hoping this time the love would last at least untill after foals came and after they grew up. After that she was going to leave him but she wanted him at least for the time they could have each other. she feels the urge to speak whats on her mind "If you wil stay..til after we have foals and after they grow up..i would be grateful..they have the right to know both of there parents..after that we may leave and go on with our lives.." she nods at him "If you promise me that i will allow myself to love you once more" she moves even closer to him now "We should catch up..perhaps we could take a walk?" she watches him turn and stretch his wings out
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Posted: Thu Jun 16, 2011 8:14 am
He took her words in silence, his eyes tight once more. Stipulations on a relationship was never a good idea, he thought, but what ever to please her. He nodded silently when she was done, and then added a "Sure." to the idea of walking. He waited for her to join his side, keeping his wings out to set along her back as if an arm.
"Yes we should." He smiled faintly, but purely. He was were he should be right now, and that made his heart soften to all he was loosing for what ever amount of time.He had no idea how long it had been, days, weeks, what, but she apparently knew she wouldn't need him forever, and he could be patient. She was quiet fun to be with regardless.
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Posted: Thu Jun 16, 2011 9:00 am
She could see ther worry in his eyes she could see him unwilling to make that commitment to her he was torn in many ways and the damage could not be repaired. She sighed knowing he was pribaly thinking about where he was before he came back to see her again he could not choose between her or them. Why was he so hesitant to love her? she knew he did but why did he hold back? He could let his worries go for at least the time he was with her..she did not get why he could not just forget them for now time would allow him to go back but she at the moment did not want to share him with anyone. She would not care what he did after foals came and after they grew up he could do whatever he wanted but she wanted him for now all of him not just a fraction of his heart. She did not know what to do at this this point everything in her life was a huge mess she would not leave him though. She felt his wing extend along her back and she just sighed bending down to retrieve her mask.
"Pavi..im lost i dont know whats right anymore..you have confused my life and what i feel..im not sure what to do it seems you cant put all your love into this even though it is only temporary..i can see the pain in your eyes your confused to.. how can this be love if we cant even trust each other to the fullest of your ability?" she sighs wondering if he understands her at all "We need to be happy..to give one another our full of everything..we both know that when we have foals and after they grow up..we wont need each other..but right now we do..cant you try to forget the others? keep them out of your mind till after this love is over? Its much to ask but Pavi..were in love cant you see that?"
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