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 Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2011 3:55 am
The only rules are:
Follow Gaia's ToS.
Keep it PG-13.
Example: Women and children first, then I'll shag the men and the animals.
*Sigh* This is what I get for watching British television.
gogogo. :3
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Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2011 4:03 am
A: Honey, how can we possibly afford a baby?
B: Don't worry, it's your best friend that has to pay child support.
A: Oh, God! The ship is sinking!
B: You can sink my ship anytime. B]
A: The house is on fire!
B: Honey, have you seen the children today?
A: Hitler is back from the dead!
B: Could be worse. It could be your mother.
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Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2011 5:38 am
~* [Outsode Burning building, woman turns to fireman]
Woman: Please, my son, he's screaming in there!
Fireman: Well, he's probably on fire...
If you stay calm whilst all around you is in chaos...then you obviously havem't understood the seriousness of the situation...*~
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Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2011 9:37 pm
A man and a woman go out to dinner. In the middle of their meal the restaurant is held up by a group of misled robbers thinking they could steal the valuables and leave. In the middle of the robbery one of the men trips and falls into the man's pre-dinner soup. At this moment, the man stands up and raises his hand. "Waiter, there's an a--hole in my soup."
Two men are out camping one day and a bear happens upon their site. Whilst cooking food the men do not see the bear until it lets out a very distinctive ear-splitting bellow. The men see the bear and begin running, as they do the man #1 begins taking off his shoes.
#2: What are you doing?
#1: Taking off my shoes to run faster.
#2: You can't outrun a bear!
#1: I know, I just have to outrun you.
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Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2011 9:49 pm
You start walk to your friendly neighbor hood liquor store when you see a masked man holding a gun to the cashier
Gunmen; Give me the money!
Cashier; We haven't had a customer all day, except him!
You; oh no no no you have mistaken
The cashier pleads silently to you as the gunmen stares at
Gunmen; Then why are you here
you look at them with a straight face and
say; Oh well i am drunk, and i crashed my car into your store while you are still getting robbed, and I came here to steal your liquor fine sir
the is an awkward pause
us dash for the beer and steal a stash full of it dropping most of it and tripping but still managing to get a little close to the door, then smashing on beer over the head of the gunmen and running out the front door and driving in your car with your body out the window saying "Drunk diver! AWAY!"
and at that moment charile sheen walks by saying "Now is Winning..."
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Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2011 10:08 pm
You are on a plane ride, when suddenly the plane ride flies out of control. As you hurtle into a 600-foot nose dive, you realize the person next to you is George Carlin. Cabin pressure drops, and as the flight attendant runs around screaming for you to get your masks on, George Carlin screams, "ROOF FLIES OFF!"
Note: If you've never heard of George Carlin this probably won't make sense. YouTube "George Carlin Airline announcements".
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Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2011 6:37 pm
Imagine your at a funeral:
Woman: *Weeps uncontrollably*
You: So i heard your grandmother is back on the market.
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Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2011 6:49 pm
You're in a convienance store with your friends, and a couple guys come in with guns to steal pharmacy meds.
You: Don't worry, I think its a fake gun. Bob, go piss them off and check.
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Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2011 7:02 pm
You're holding your dieing sibling in your arms. As they're drawing their last breaths, you say, "So... does this mean I get your stuff?"
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Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 8:12 pm
Earth Gods Lyric You're holding your dieing sibling in your arms. As they're drawing their last breaths, you say, "So... does this mean I get your stuff?" Ha, that's terrible. But the fact that I laughed probably makes me not much better.
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Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 8:14 pm
At an open-casket funeral, budge your way in line saying "I want first dibs on her, I'm not settling for sloppy seconds like at the last one."
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Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 8:16 pm
rolleyes I think this thread may need to be moved into "fun and games". It seems like something fun for the sub forum.
If another crew member feels differently feel free to move it back to "Quizzes and spam"
neutral "Is this your femur or mine?"
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Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 8:16 pm
DopefishRock Earth Gods Lyric You're holding your dieing sibling in your arms. As they're drawing their last breaths, you say, "So... does this mean I get your stuff?" Ha, that's terrible. But the fact that I laughed probably makes me not much better.
I felt bad for writing it. XD
"Layton's apprentice saves the day!"
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Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 8:18 pm
Earth Gods Lyric DopefishRock Earth Gods Lyric You're holding your dieing sibling in your arms. As they're drawing their last breaths, you say, "So... does this mean I get your stuff?" Ha, that's terrible. But the fact that I laughed probably makes me not much better.
I felt bad for writing it. XD
"Layton's apprentice saves the day!" I felt bad for writing mine, but I never meant it for truth. I'm sure everyone has a dark sense of humor somewhere in them.
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Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 8:22 pm
DopefishRock Earth Gods Lyric DopefishRock Earth Gods Lyric You're holding your dieing sibling in your arms. As they're drawing their last breaths, you say, "So... does this mean I get your stuff?" Ha, that's terrible. But the fact that I laughed probably makes me not much better.
I felt bad for writing it. XD
"Layton's apprentice saves the day!" I felt bad for writing mine, but I never meant it for truth. I'm sure everyone has a dark sense of humor somewhere in them.
My sense of humor is extremely dark. I mean, really dark.
"Layton's apprentice saves the day!"
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