Amara had been thinking often about her situation in life. She was a mother to four lovely cubs -- though Chacha seemed forever lost to her, and Koko was as distant as ever, Amara had brought them all into this world. She had provided for them, given them life, shelter and a mother's love. Now they were all grown and starting families of her own. It was a frightening thought. Even Thuraya's cubs had grown into beautiful adults. They were all stunning and happy, and it warmed Amara's heart. Thuraya was her sister perhaps not by blood but by bond. In all honesty Amara had never been happier. The only thing that could give her even more enjoyment was having Kwea's children. Ahh, their time would come.
Koko was furious. Frustrated beyond all control. Edge had left with Chacha and had returned without her. Chacha had found a way to escape this awful pride, and here Koko remained. A grown lioness in her step-father's harem. She slept alone, ate alone, drank alone and hunted alone. Even though Thuraya's cubs had all grown into adults, Koko would never forget having to provide for them. No, she could never forgive her mother and Kwea for forcing her into this life of slavery. That is what she was, in all honesty. A slave. A slave to no other lion than her step-father, and it grated on her nerves. When she was younger she'd wanted so much more for herself. Yes, even to be her step-father's beybanu though now the thought sickened her. Everything sickened her. Rigidly she stepped from the den she shared with Kwea and Kifa and Thuraya and her mother. Those green eyes landed on her mother, sunning herself regally in the dust nearby. Koko wanted to smash her face in.
With a stiff-legged movement Koko approached her mother. Derisively she stared at the older lioness, one who could have been Koko's twin from a distance. The same spots, though different colors, similar chocolate pelt. How could Koko have such hatred for the female that had provided her with the very life the pulsed through her veins? Sometimes Koko didn't even understand why she felt this way. She had not always been such a hateful lioness. No, something had happened to make her this bitter and furious, full of rage and fury.
Condemned to a life where she was destined to share the love of any male she chose. Imprisoned by males with lofty egos and heavy paws. What joy was there to find in this life? What happiness was there to be had? Koko saw only despair -- all in thanks to her mother. Her mother had been the one who had come to this place willingly. Her mother was the one who had driven away Chacha.
Amara dozed lightly, the warmth of the sun seeping into her bones. Since there were no cubs pattering about, she was free to enjoy such frivolous things. It was not yet time for a hunt, though she could set Koko and Thuraya off to bring back dinner if she so chose. No, Amara was not a taskmaster. She enjoyed spending time with Thuraya though the same could not be said for her daughter. Amara had not yet been able to understand why Koko held such resentment towards her. Perhaps in time her daughter would open up her heart.
Catching a familiar scent without opening her eyes, Amara greeted her daughter. "Good morning, Koko. How did you sleep, daughter?"
Every word that fell so carelessly from Amara's lips grated against Koko's every nerve. She should just rip her throat out and be done with it, but she knew Kwea would have her killed. There was no doubt in Kokojicho's clever mind that such a thing would give him great joy. Kwea had no love in his heart for Amara's daughters, that much was true by the way Chacha had been driven from the pride.
Koko answered with only a snort as she seated herself near her mother. Ther tail lashed about wildly, the only outward proof of her inner turmoil. "Mother," she spat as greeting, skin crawling with fury. "Have you heard any news of Chacha?"
Amara squeezed her eyes closed. No, she had heard nothing of Chacha, her bright desert flower. How Amara missed seeing that bright and vibrant pelt darting here and there. She could only hope that her daughter had found peace either in her new life or in the death that was hinted at. "I have not, Koko. It saddens me to lose her."
Koko choked back a snarl, instead baring her teeth the slightest. Her mother could not see the grimace, but Koko felt better for doing it. She would never outwardly admit to being jealous of Chacha's freedom. She wanted to hurt Amara in the same way that Koko hurt, betray her in the same way that Koko felt betrayed. Was it irrational? Absolutely. Was it borderline crazy? Of course. But Koko could not tamp down the rage and pain and fury that welled in her chest, threatening to explode in a beautiful flash of red.
"It saddens you?! You, who brought us here? You, who caused her such pain and heartache? You, who forced us into this life? YOU are saddened?!" Koko's claws unsheathed as she bristled with fury. How dare her mother so glibly speak of missing Chacha? How dare she dismiss Chacha's disappearance as something that was of no fault of Amara's? No! The blame rested solely on Amara's shoulders! No others!
Only at Koko's words did Amara open those pink eyes of hers. Deep within her eyes glistened hurt and pain. Such accusations from the mouth of a daughter she'd nurtured and loved -- even now still loved despite these hurtful words -- broke her heart. She could see now that she'd lost both of her beloved daughters. "I... I cannot apologize for what I have done, Kokojicho. I can only say in my own defense that you were born within this pride because I had no place else to go."
"Bah," Koko spat, hissing at her mother. "Your words are nothing but lies and filth. You are no mother of mine." That being said, Koko spun on her heel and skulked away.
Amara watched her go. What else could she do? What else could she say?
WC: 1017 on WCT
