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 Posted: Sun Feb 20, 2011 4:06 pm
Hmm So I was In the chatterbox and this young lady of age 18 had said on valentines day, she had arranged a kinky date with a man on the internet, she had never met. And she hadnt really expected to have sex, but they did. She was screaming on the inside ( she was virgin) and now she is sorta tramatized, and thinking of iling rape charges. What do you think about this issue?
In my opinion, she has no case and even filing against this man would be horrible. I mean she made no attempt to resist, and this mans life could be ruined because, this would go on file. What do you think?
Her Words, Copy And Pasted
Hi, Life Issues.
So it's been quite a while since I've been on Gaia, and even longer since I've posted in Life Issues.
But I suppose something like this deserves a post, because I don't know what to do.
I don't feel like displaying the entire story with every last detail, but the Saturday before last, I had an unfortunate run-in with the act every girl on this planet is terrified of...Rape.
I am now a statistic.
Not even the forgivable kind, either.
I take full responsibility for my actions, which I'm sure I will be judged for by some troll soon after this is posted.
I made a huge mistake.
I planned to meet someone I barely knew online who lived near me for a play-date. As in a kink-date.
After getting dumped by my last boyfriend, I decided it was high time to explore my fetishes a little bit now that I'm of age.
It completely backfired on me.
I had intended to fool around and explore, as a virgin (which was my first mistake; who tries to explore fetishes when they're still a virgin?) and just gain a little experience. Unfortunately, I gained more than I bargained for.
I got in a complete stranger's car, drove all the way to his apartment, and somehow did not expect to have sex. Something in my brain said telling him I was a virgin was enough of a "no," but before I knew it, he was in me. I was too busy screaming from the shock and pain to say no.
So when it was all over, he drove me home with me acting like everything was completely fine, and this guy having no knowledge that I never wanted to have sex.
So when I got back to my car, I called my best friend and broke down in his arms.
I threw away all of my kinky toys, deleted my profile on the site I met him, and swore off internet dating.
I have ruined every chance at a normal relationship ever again; my friends are usually pretty touchy-feely too, and they're starting to notice that I'm yelling at them to get the ******** off me when they barely touch me.
I never want to engage in such an act ever again that I'm willing to be alone the rest of my life to avoid it.
And it's all my fault.
I even told myself before I got in the car that I could have left...that I could have gotten out then. I could have gone home and it would have all been over, but instead I destroyed my already anxiety-ridden mind with random thoughts of the worst night of my life.
So what do I get for Valentine's Day?
An appointment for an STD test and praying to God that I'm not pregnant.
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Posted: Sun Feb 20, 2011 5:20 pm
...you probably don't want to hear what an actual rape victim has to say.
My first inclination is to say that it is grossly unjust that actual victims of rape are denied the resources and help they need because of women who cry 'wolf'. But at the same time I must acknowledge I wasn't actually there, I don't know what actually happened.
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Posted: Sun Feb 20, 2011 6:12 pm
Lateralus es Helica ...you probably don't want to hear what an actual rape victim has to say. My first inclination is to say that it is grossly unjust that actual victims of rape are denied the resources and help they need because of women who cry 'wolf'. But at the same time I must acknowledge I wasn't actually there, I don't know what actually happened. let me get the story..ill post it EDIT: Its up Top
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Posted: Sun Feb 20, 2011 8:46 pm
xXSpirit KnightXx Lateralus es Helica ...you probably don't want to hear what an actual rape victim has to say. My first inclination is to say that it is grossly unjust that actual victims of rape are denied the resources and help they need because of women who cry 'wolf'. But at the same time I must acknowledge I wasn't actually there, I don't know what actually happened. let me get the story..ill post it EDIT: Its up Top ...that one's a tricky one to comment on because there's no way of telling what's truth and what's lie. If we take her at her word though, on one hand she's an idiot. On the second hand she's a naive idiot that's probably confused and scared. Even morons don't deserve to have themselves forced upon... ...but that's if we take her at her word. Based on what little I can tell, it looks like an attention ploy. I had an unfortunate run-in with the act every girl on this planet is terrified of...Rape.
I am now a statistic. Kind of cut and dry and dramatically typed out for an actual rape victim. Most of them won't say a word, it's a dirty skeleton they'll keep locked up tight in their closet and it generally doesn't come out unless someone else somehow finds out about it. But I also have all my judgment to base on someone's typing on a public, internet forum so it's hard to really judge character based on typing alone. If my hunch there is true, it's the kind of attitude that makes me want to break the Pacifist stance and slap her silly.
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Colorful Shadows Vice Captain
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Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 4:24 pm
I, Myself can fight for both answers on this topic.
Yes- I would be pretty psyched out if I was raped. Actually, I would be in such shock that I would not even try to tell anyone, until I was founded pregnant. So if the case was pregnancy, I would then file a charge. Plus, some people are too scared to fight back against the rapist... I would be, because they could kill you after they were finished with you. Rape is a scary thing.
No- No, as stated above, if it did only scare me, I wouldn't. If it did harm, heck yeah.
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Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 2:01 pm
Colorful Shadows I, Myself can fight for both answers on this topic.
Yes- I would be pretty psyched out if I was raped. Actually, I would be in such shock that I would not even try to tell anyone, until I was founded pregnant. So if the case was pregnancy, I would then file a charge. Plus, some people are too scared to fight back against the rapist... I would be, because they could kill you after they were finished with you. Rape is a scary thing.
No- No, as stated above, if it did only scare me, I wouldn't. If it did harm, heck yeah. Ditto
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Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 2:09 pm
I may seem young but heres what I think:
Unless you have a disease that could kill you that you got from him or your pregnant then you shouldn't charge because other wise it would make no sense to charge him.
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Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 7:39 pm
from what she's posted it doesn't seem as if she should be charging the guy. But the details are quite few and far between here and it does seem awfully....dramatized and rehearsed? So it's hard to tell what of it is honest. I do feel really bad for the girl. But I'm not sure if charging him for rape would be right. That would be one thing that could really wreck his career and life.
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Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 7:59 pm
I don't think she should charge this dude. She did agree to go on a date and could've resisted but she didn't. Although it is sad it's not really rape, but I hope she's not pregnant or has any STD.
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Posted: Fri Mar 25, 2011 7:15 pm
It sounds like she a) wasn't drugged and b) never said "no" or struggled to escape, in which case she would have no grounds for filing such a charge. Her regretting the encounter doesn't make it rape.
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Posted: Fri Mar 25, 2011 9:12 pm
Agreed with Iconoclast Enthusiast, just because she she has buyer's remorse does not mean that he did anything illegal. She should make better choices in the future.
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Posted: Sun Mar 27, 2011 6:07 pm
This is rape. Of course men will never see this as rape, but women will. You don't think he should be charge because it might ruin his life? What about this girl who was raped? What about her life? Her life is not ruin? Men who rape should have to be castrated, and if you think that is too harsh I really don't care.
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Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2011 9:36 pm
I feel terrible for the girl. I really do. But if the guy had no idea she didn't want it (which she stated to be the case) then he can't really take blame. I'm not saying he was in the right, but how was he supposed to know that was how she felt if she didn't tell him? I don't see how he can be blamed for her, in the words of UnoriginalSin1753, buyer's remorse. She went into the encounter, as far as the guy was concerned, willingly. How can he take a blame for something he didn't know to be against her will? Especially when she asked him out online, went in his car, to his apartment, to explore sexual fetishes. Everything she did screamed 'I want to have sex with you'.
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Posted: Wed May 04, 2011 4:04 pm
They're both at fault: the girl for being stupid and the guy for misinterpretation.
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Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 3:29 pm
If she never told him no I do not want to have sex with you. Then he is not at fault here. she arranged the date with him drove home with him and did not try to stop him. he can't read minds he didn't know what she was thinking. Makes me sick. She just wants atten. and someone to feel sorry for her. Rape is not something to be played around with like that. 
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