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 Posted: Sun Feb 06, 2011 2:36 pm
 Cas thought he was beginning to feel a shift: in the last long months of his tenure at Antianeira, the whole of his life had been preoccupied with piles and piles of worry - worries that waxed and waned and coalesced, and culminated in the terrifying prospect of abandoning all that he knew while finally taking up the mantle of full-time single parenthood. Now, a few days into his new position and his new pack, he thought he might be grateful for the boys. The move had turned them into little monsters, fuzzy bawling, brawling dervishes that kept him too occupied to do any thinking for himself. They had worn themselves down for the moment, and were napping down in the den until they were ready to start up again in an hour or two. After listening to their deep, busy breathing for a few meditative moments, the big wolf backed out of the den and sat, trying to keep his inevitable exhausted sigh relatively quiet. Maybe, he thought, yawning and rubbing his face with a paw, they would keep him this busy forever. Then he would never have to look up and see where he was, or talk to another wolf who looked like a distorted reflection of himself, or acknowledge the very disturbing fact that he was now somehow uprooted, exiled from his previous life by way of a monster aping as Head Warrior.
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Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 10:27 am
 Adonai really couldn't tell you, on an average day, how he felt about what his life had become. He was pretty sure he was pleased. He liked the grandpups well enough, anyway, and for the most part he was beginning to feel like maybe Terreis wouldn't kill him in his sleep, so that much was good.
But his recent visit to Antianeira had left him feeling out of sorts. There's just something about the threat of violence from a blood relation -- even one who you didn't know existed -- that makes one's heart ache. And worse, all Terreis could do was sniff out an "I told you so" when she had quite definitely not told him so. The whole thing was a fiasco.
And even if his daughters weren't both uptight and violent and occasionally sadistic, there was still the matter of his middle age that he hadn't quite come to reconcile.
Ah, well. Best to ignore some things....
He found himself wandering, and after a bit of meandering found himself upon the path of a large-bodied male. His brow furrowed, and he sniffed at him; curiously, the male carried a lingering scent of female, and it made Adonai's brows raise. Well...some of us are born lucky... "Well, hello," he replied, good naturedly, glancing around before approaching the other. "I think I haven't met you before."
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Posted: Sat Feb 19, 2011 9:53 am
Oh...Cas's stomach gave a little churn at the sound of Adonai's voice. He had in no way figured out the proper way to relate to other males here, and these pangs of nervousness whenever he ran into one had yet to abate. Even tired, though, Casimir was still pretty courageous, so he bobbed his head up out of the dazed stare he had been pulling, smiled sweetly, and gave his tail a little wag. "That's true," he called back, his voice pure lupine saccharine, "you haven't." He stood, looking oddly deferent with his nose down, with a little self-aware awkwardness thrown in too. "My name is Casimir, I've only been here a couple of days."
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Posted: Sat Feb 19, 2011 10:03 am
Adonai's brow furrowed as he surveyed the other, the wheels and cogs spinning in his thoughts. "Well, I welcome you," he said, slowly, eyeballing the other wolf carefully. He'd seen a wolf act this way once before -- the nervousness, the deference, the brokenness..."Good to see another newcomer like myself," he said, casually. "Seems most of our new members of late have been refugees from our...sister...pack to the north."
He shrugged, as though the comment were of no consequence. "A pleasure, Casimir. I'm Adonai."
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Posted: Sat Feb 19, 2011 10:19 am
Now, why on earth would he choose to put it like that? Cas's face briefly darkened as well, and he raised his head to look at the white wolf directly. He still wasn't used to the strange double-image he saw in so many males here: that feminine power and confidence refused to resolve itself with a male body to him. With a wolf like this, though, he thought maybe he could return the attitude with something besides deference...he just had to figure out what. "It's nice to meet you, Adonai," he responded slowly, his face a little tense and watchful for the situation. "I...grew up in your sister pack, actually." One of his ears twisted a little in awkwardness (he could do better at hiding these things); he was very much aware that he was a refugee, but this in no way lessened the intense pride he still felt for his homeland, and that was not the sort of dissonance he could gracefully handle in a conversation.
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Posted: Sat Feb 19, 2011 10:35 am
"Oh?" Adonai's ears swept forward, brows raising slightly. He looked politely surprised. "Well, apologies -- I meant no offense towards them."
Oh, but he did, and he wondered if in his heart the other wolf did too. This situation afforded him a unique opportunity, now that he thought about it...an opportunity, first and foremost, to sniff out information on that infernal pack from a party perhaps less biased with blind affection for its ways than Terreis.
"My son is there," he said, trying to keep his tone conversational but unable to hold back the bitterness that clawed at his voice. "Perhaps you know him? His name is Iosef."
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Posted: Sat Feb 19, 2011 11:00 am
Casimir was physically startled at this, and then promptly made further uncomfortable; he had imagined a Fresh Start here, the one real positive in the whole ordeal, but apparently that had been too much to hope for. Life was still complicated and awkward and full of too much information on this side of the border. His mouth hung open for a second or two as he tried to figure out at which angle to address this. "Of course I know Iosef," he began, not all that politely, unable to keep himself from looking and listening toward his den, "we've been in the same pack our whole lives." Consternation tugged at his face at the memory of Iosef, and then blossomed profusely as he realized who else's father this wolf must be: he coughed and sat down, staring pointedly to the left of Adonai. He hadn't really escaped her at all, had he? He was sitting in her ******** backyard, surrounded by all her relatives, just a day's walk away.
It took a few seconds for Cas to get control of his face, and another handful to determine how this sort of breach of courtesy ought to be handled. Maybe just...drop courtesy altogether. He made to meet Adonai's gaze again. "I know your whole family, actually. Varia's the reason I had to leave." And...well, it was going to come up before long, anyway. "She, um. She had three sons," he explained, a little cryptically, and nodded toward the den.
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Posted: Sat Feb 19, 2011 11:08 am
Lately Terreis had been avoiding almost every member of the pack, not that that was anything new really, but after the recent incident involving her father, who she still hated to admit was her father, and their trip to Antianeira she preferred to be alone. There was much to think about and really none of it she wanted to think about or acknowledge some days. Derecho had been supportive in his own gruff and typical way and she appreciated that he didn't try to force her into accepting Adonai as who he truly was. And of course just when she had finished pushing all thought of that from her mind Casimir and his pups, her nephews, had arrived and brought back all those thoughts anew.
She had nothing against Casimir, he had been a good slave in the pack for his entire life, but the fact that he had been bossed into fathering Varia's pups made her hesitant to talk to him. Terreis still found it hard to deal with her five son, newly found father and now she had three nephews in her midst. YMCA was quickly becoming so male dominated that it put her on edge, all these male wanderers as well as those coming from Antianeira for a safe place to live was a bit overwhelming. She hadn't left her old pack to join a male dominated pack.
The scent of males came to her nose and she instantly recognized the scents. There were two of them, one belonging to Casimir, though his scent still held a good amount of female to it, and the other was Adonai's. Fur stood on end at the thought of her father and as she padded closer to the two she heard a single word from their conversation - Iosef. What was he saying about her brother? Stepping out from the trees Terreis eyed the two males. The mention of Varia made her skin crawl, the last few run into with her sister had not gone so well. Part of her wondered if Casimir knew about his daughter, the only offspring of his and Varia's that she had kept or even acknowledged as her own.
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Posted: Sun Feb 20, 2011 12:31 am
Somehow it hadn't fully occurred to Adonai that Iosef could have possibly actually grown up in that pack. Of course he had -- what else would he have done? -- but the idea of the pup growing up and making friends and living some semblance of a normal life while stripped of his freedom...that was too bizarre to contemplate. He stared back at Casimir for a baffled moment, clearly just as confused about how to breach this topic.
Then the other paw dropped, and Adonai's expression suddenly sharpened. "Varia?" He said. His first -- and hopefully last -- encounter with his eldest daughter had left a bitter taste in his mouth. Not only because she had tried to kill him (he could forgive that, as a trespasser, he had enough respect for other culture to accept threats of violence) but because of the monster she seemed to be. She was a wolf who would do anything to be successful...who would willingly tear apart families and kill her blood-kin...and it frightened him not because his daughter was a sociopath, but because he wondered what part of himself had spawned her.
Also, sweet oaks, was he really a grandfather three times over now?!
"You're...the father?" He said, slowly, and his eyes softened. "Oh....I'm sorry."
Then he caught the scent of Terreis, and he put on a bit of a theatrical smile, and said -- sincerely, but also loudly enough for her benefit -- "Well, that practically makes me your father, doesn't it, in a way. I'm willing to guess you haven't had that opportunity before?"
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Posted: Sun Feb 20, 2011 3:28 pm
Casimir didn't bother to answer with anything beyond a look of resigned misery; hopefully someday, his escapade with Varia would be a topic he could understand and talk about, but such a day was yet to come. He was dwelling on this when Adonai lit up and spoke again, which could have been the reason that strange offer fell so flat: was this guy...Varia's father...offering...what? He had no information for what a father was supposed to offer an adult child; Adonai may as well have offered to be his pet fish. He blinked, trying to keep his face neutral, trying to think of what to say. "You can imagine, fathers are not all that important where I grew up," he replied carefully.
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Posted: Sun Feb 20, 2011 3:41 pm
"Nor are they around here," Adonai said, casting an agitated glance over his shoulder in the vague direction of where he suspected Terreis would be. He was ruffled. He had never wanted to be a father, much less a grandfather, but the least they could do was accept him. He was putting out the effort, after all.
He shrugged and looked back at Casimir. "Well. I suppose the whole notion is a rather uncomfortable one." He said. He still couldn't get past the idea that a wolf might not have had willing aspirations toward freedom.
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Posted: Sun Feb 20, 2011 5:50 pm
She had remained just at the edge of the trees, out of view of the two males for long enough. All this talk of fathers made her feel a bit ill. Damn right Antianeira didn't care too much about fathers, it's not like most of them were part of the pack or even knew that they were fathers, much like how Adonai had been unaware until he happened upon YMCA by chance. A few, like Casimir, were slaves used strictly for breeding by whatever female took a fancy to them, though it was still weird that Varia had chosen him, Terries had always believed Varia would never have pups. But it had happened and nothing she could do about it.
Stepping out from the trees, though she stayed close to them, Terreis looked at the two males, one her father, one a former slave of her former pack. "Not like he knows much about being a father himself." She told Casimir in regards to Adonai. "I wouldn't put much stock in him being helpful or sharing any advice."
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Posted: Sun Feb 20, 2011 7:11 pm
Something hard-wired in Cas caused him to jump at Terreis's voice, to unobtrusively stand and duck his head - he might not have done it for any female's voice, but he recognized the tone and cadence bred into the way the she-wolf spoke, the unconscious authority there over himself, and accommodated to it without even realizing. It took a moment of disorientation, of remembering that he was not expected to be anyone's slave here, to come back to the present; catching himself, he flicked a couple sidelong glances toward the other wolves, corrected his posture back to only mild subservience. Unable to address her the way he wanted to (Good afternoon, Sister, are you in need of anything?), he remained silent, stewing in his own discomfort.
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Posted: Mon Feb 21, 2011 11:11 am
Adonai's eyes flicked to his daughter and he gave her a strained smile. "Oh, Terreis, nice of you to drop in."
He looked back at Casimir and stiffened. How the wolf cowed and shivered and looked so miserable! What kind of wolf did that to another? To their sons? No son of Adonai's was going to be broken like that!
...And to think, he still had one grandson inside of their clutches as well. The thought churned his stomach.
"Have you two met?" He asked, pleasantly enough. Apparently the 'been in that pack my whole life' concept was still lost on him. Poor Adonai...for all the things he'd seen in his life, he still couldn't grasp some ideas. This ridiculous pack was the predominant one.
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Posted: Mon Feb 21, 2011 8:53 pm
Her eyes swept from Casimir to Adonai and then back to Casimir. It was obvious that he had not fully adjusted to life here the way he instantly fell into that typical submissive pose that the slaves knew so well. Though she did not smile, nor did she order him around, it wasn't like that here even if every now and then she wished that she could bark out some orders to the less than stellar members. When her eyes fell back onto her father she merely stared at him for a couple of moments, but did not reply to his comment.
"Of course we have met before. He served the Sisters for many years while I was amongst them and well after I left." Her attention turned back to Casimir, he was part of her family now, whether she liked it or not, but Terreis knew deep in her heart she would never let her nephews go back to be torments by Varia. "How are the boys doing?" If Adonai said anything in regards to her asking about the pups or pointing out that she didn't even care for her own sons that much - well she would ripe out his throat or something. Males may not matter to her as much to her as females, but family was something that was precious to her and she would keep her family protected if she could - well except for Adonai of course, he was on his own.
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