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 Posted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 4:19 pm
As a follow to this topic, i'm poseign the other one....
how do i let a girl i really like, and am somewhat dating, know what my real feelings are baout sex..cause im a virgin, and due to peer pressure and self ridicule and cause im a guy i naturally want to loose it. But..... even though i think some teen agers can be mornic for havign sex and then breaking up,, i still think its somethgin you shoudl do if you truely love someone.........at that time(for those who've broken up)
like...i was talkign with her on yahoo a few nigths ago and i had asked her if she wanted to meet my friends in a few days or when she comes over...and she said,
"no, you'll be to busy to introduce me..."
now being a male my instant reactio nwas to think !!!!!!uck yeah!!!!!
but because im more civilized then that, i inquired more.
turns out that IS what she wants to do, ever since i've been layign in bed at nigth curled up, not really in the fetile(its close enough) position, but close to it. arguing with myself about wheather it would be right to or not. well, not if it would be right, but if i was ready for it, and if i wanteed to tell her face to face or be a coward and tell her over the internet or the phone and just stop talkign to her for like a week. i havent come up with an answer.
I asked a friend today what i shoudl do, and she probebd me for all teh info, and i agev ti to her..and what she came up with, is to wait to tell it to her face, and say i just wanna get to physically knwo her first, and emotionally as well..then after a while...like a year or two.......... have sex.
and as extreme as that is in somepeoples eyes, i don't see it as a bad ammount of time, true there will be soe....arousaled situations but i haeve my way or weasling out of them.
but like ..... i've been going through s**t load of strees and s**t and i want out of it... what do i do?
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Posted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 6:49 pm
being a virgin is nothing to be ashamed.
its a good thing u are.
but basically, when the time is right u should tell her,
she should understand.
if not, she is not right.
u should feel comfortable expressing urself.
theres no need to hide if ur a virgin or not.
i hope i help, if not i tried.
take cares.
PM me if theres anything else.
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Posted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 7:15 pm
singledaisy being a virgin is nothing to be ashamed. its a good thing u are. but basically, when the time is right u should tell her, she should understand. if not, she is not right. u should feel comfortable expressing urself. theres no need to hide if ur a virgin or not. i don't hide my virginity, but i don't run around flaunting it with a sign, saying "freash Meat" imean, when the conversation comes up about sex, i sorta just remove myself from it, by putting headphones on or reading, mostly cause i don't knwo what they're talkgin about, and i probably don't wann aknow. its just what i do, i can talk openly about it to a certain point with lots of peopel around then when i hit that point, thats when it needs to be just me and other 1-3 peopel , and no one else, but i rearely ever get tricked into talkign abou tit, cause i remove myself from the conversation.
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Posted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 7:29 pm
There's nothing wrong with talking about sex with other people. You don't have to mention that you're still a virgin (there's nothing wrong with that, btw), but you can still join in and comment on things.
As for talking about sex with a girl, you should try talking to her once you're both comfortable around each other, and when you both feel ok with opening up to each other about it. That may take awhile in a relationship, or it might happen soon after you start dating. Everyone is different.
On a side note, please proofread what you type before your click the "submit" button. Your posts are hard to read due to all of the typos and grammatical errors.
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Posted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 8:59 pm
Nikolita There's nothing wrong with talking about sex with other people. You don't have to mention that you're still a virgin (there's nothing wrong with that, btw), but you can still join in and comment on things. As for talking about sex with a girl, you should try talking to her once you're both comfortable around each other, and when you both feel ok with opening up to each other about it. That may take awhile in a relationship, or it might happen soon after you start dating. Everyone is different. On a side note, please proofread what you type before your click the "submit" button. Your posts are hard to read due to all of the typos and grammatical errors. yea, uh..the whole grammer part.. i kinda have tenditis, and so my hands shake alot when im concentrated on somethign that envolves those mucles., so , yeah i'll spell check it, but if i miss a coupel don like..whine or anything, cause im not that attentive to small spelling errors.
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Posted: Mon Jan 30, 2006 9:09 pm
Nikolita There's nothing wrong with talking about sex with other people. You don't have to mention that you're still a virgin (there's nothing wrong with that, btw), but you can still join in and comment on things. As for talking about sex with a girl, you should try talking to her once you're both comfortable around each other, and when you both feel ok with opening up to each other about it. That may take awhile in a relationship, or it might happen soon after you start dating. Everyone is different. On a side note, please proofread what you type before your click the "submit" button. Your posts are hard to read due to all of the typos and grammatical errors. also, the thoign with the whole gettign adjusted physically to each other. my friend tol dme the same thing, but, thing is, when tihs girl come over, shes stayign for a week, during that time she could want to do it then and there, ...without general regard to, ...our surroundings......or somethign along those lines. i dunno, she just said and hinted as well, that there was going to be somesort of activiity envolving this. and i've had my undies in a bundle ever since. im really not sure if am tellign myself i don't want to , or if i'm tellign myself i want. it ******** hurts. its like seriously one of the hardest decision i've ever had to make, and like, not...but mentally freaking out, (mentally freaking out: freaking out, except you do it in your mind, and show no sign of it on the outside.)
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Posted: Tue Jan 31, 2006 5:44 pm
does any one else have any ideas? caus ei can't think of anythign to do...and i dontreally feel like havign her take what i say the wrong way.
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Posted: Wed Feb 01, 2006 1:59 pm
My apologies, I didn't know you had a physical problem that affected your typing. Don't worry about it then, since it can't be helped. smile
Well, even if she "wants to do it right then and there", doesn't mean that YOU have to do it too. If you're nervous, uncomfortable, doubting yourself/her, those are all signs that you might just not be ready to have sex yet. And that's both normal and perfectly fine.
You could ask her that to wait because you're not ready, you could ask her to slow down, etc. Or, plain and simple, tell her "I'm not as experienced as you, and I'm not ready to have sex. If you would like to continue dating me, please respect my decision. Perhaps further on in our relationship, I'll be more comfortable with having sex."
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Posted: Wed Feb 01, 2006 5:37 pm
Nikolita "I'm not as experienced as you, and I'm not ready to have sex. If you would like to continue dating me, please respect my decision. Perhaps further on in our relationship, I'll be more comfortable with having sex." wow damn, talk about your formalities, and i'm one of the few guys, that i know, who actually values the old gentlemens honor code. your more formal then i am...of course that was just an example...but seeing hwo write like that normally, caues i don't find it to fit in with the common day and palce as well as i've had enough toture in my life about how i look let alone how i speak. bah! but yeah, i've known my friends to do just what you say, and it worked for them. but only because, (i know this from the girls point of view), she wouldn't have any one to be with for sexual reasons, or, they needed someoen to b***h at..stupid little things...thats not what im afraid of..what im afraid of is she'll say ", don't love..i'll go find someone else to be with." and she'll leave....and for the fact that she's kinda only my third gf, and the only one to know me this long and not dump me over somthign i didnt do, and is the only one i truely like.......i don't wanna risk loosing her. but i want to tell her as well.... you see wher eim coming from here?
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