+++ Loyal's Diary +++

[Adele_Mai]

+++ Pages from Middle School +++

I've always felt like the adults in our village looked at and treated me differently from the other children. I never understood why, but I accepted it with out any questions. It wasn't until today when Tsuki and I were playing by the river that one of the adults lashed out at me. We were playing carelessly and Tsuki fell in. I couldn't reach Tsuki, so I went to go get help. The fisherman, Mori, came and rescued her before she could be swept away. I walked with Mori who carried Tsuki back to her house. I apologized to Tsuki's family for playing in a place we knew was dangerous. Then, Tsuki's mother lashed out at me. She called me an illegitimate child, a hindrance to the village and filthy. Tsuki's mother said I carried the sins of my mother and brought misfortune to all. I was never able to hang around Tsuki again.

I didn't believe her, but when I asked Mori-san about what she said, he was silent. Running home to my Grandfather I cried and he told me everything; how my mother had an affair and my father killed my mother out at sea and then took his own life. My Grandfather told me that I don't bare the sins of my mother and father. I am my own person and must create my own path in life. Even though my Grandfather was kind enough to say so... I didn't feel that way at school the next day. There was a thick air around me that kept everyone at bay. None of the children spoke to me, but whispered about me and my family. Everyone knew now... I was so alone.  

[Adele_Mai]

+++ Highschool Years +++

I've been doing fine on my own since word got out about my parents and my birth. Walking home by myself, playing in the gardens with Grandfather's dog and even attending festivals with on my Grandfather by my side were all activities I loved. My Grandfather kept telling me to move forward on my own feet and ignore the whispers around me. It was all fine until high school...

My classmates grew crueler by the day and no longer sneered at my presence from a distance. Bullying started with the girls calling me names, knocking my books to the ground in the hallways and even flattening the tires of my bike. It was discouraging, but I never let it get to me. I kept a smile on for Grandfather and always tried to push forward especially when Grandfather grew ill. A doctor had to travel to our village in order to treat him. I didn't like going to school and leaving Grandfather alone all day, but he was stubborn and insisted some days... The bullying stopped temporarily, but it returned with a vengeance.

One day after gym, the girls in my class took my clothes. My underwear was pinned up on the hallways tag board and I never found out what happened to my other clothes. At lunch, they decided to get physical with me and pin me in a corner. They said Grandfather was dying because of my mother mistakes and having to care for me. Like a fool, I believed them. If it weren't for me, Grandfather wouldn't have done so much work over the years. He could've retired early, but he struggled to keep his farm open. Once the bell rang and lunch was over, I tried my tears and wiped away the blood from my wounds. While I was walking back, late to class, I heard the teachers talking about what had just happened... "She deserved it," is what they snickered to each other. I didn't return to class. I started running home as fast as I could.