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Tags: Friends, Dreams, Chatterbox, Roleplay, Peace 

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my writings!!!! ♥ (comments please???)

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viper_353
Crew

PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 12:32 pm


Haa, so here I'll put some random things I write, kay? Critique is appreciated! And no stealing whatever I write, kay? thanks!! smile
PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 12:33 pm


Unspoken

In the moonlight a girl leans back, watching the man in the fields.
He had black on tonight. A black so deep it seemed
Hardly right to wear. But that mattered not.
She sat in silence, observing the way he moved, his laugh, his smile.
It was her own tragedy, her own love story.
Two people destined by their own actions never to speak again.
Her, entranced by him,
But never to expect anything in return.
This is how it is, and how it has been.
She touched the silk of her blue dress, a dress which he would never see
But she wore on these nights anyways.
The man looked up and subconsciously she made a step behind the lamppost.
It was never right to see him, never right to know how he smiled.
And as guilt won over she walked home, ever silent in the darkness.

In the lamplight, a man watches across the street.
There laughs a beautiful girl, bathed in blue silk; so contrasting to his black.
A girl whom fate had dictated he would never meet again.
This was the life he would have traded for any other.
It was his own love story, his own tragedy.  

viper_353
Crew


viper_353
Crew

PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 12:36 pm


So don't tell them that Santa's not real,
Don't tell her that they're split apart.
Don't tell him that she'll never love him,
Don't tell her she'll never live up.

Don't say that her chances are over
and don't mention that money's been spent.
Don't tell him his future is missing and
that dad left the family a mess.

Don't break for an instant this bubble let kids be just kids for just once.
You can tell them that life isn't rainbows, But don't tell them that they'll be like us.

please rate it or comment in the art arenas? thanks!!! smile
>>♥here♥<<  
PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 3:35 pm


Fallen Angels

I stand by our table. Our comfortable nest of friends and watch.
Who knows you here like I do? Who could tell what you thought about.
None of them.
And in some way....me?
The girls laugh, you make them smile.
I look down into our puddles of garbage. The orange peels of fruit we like to throw on the ground, and consider.
How much longer can this peace last? Have we not all grown too big, too different from eachother to maintain our desperate balance? But why should we have to change?
Days pass. Months, a year. Now we are all hidden behind the great mounds of work we burry ourselves in. We've grown uncomfortable with eachother.
One word from you echoes several different ones in each of our minds.
Now, they too smell the drugs.
They've noticed the smell on your breath,
the money you come back with, after those silent slip-aways.
This year, things are different.
We can no longer trust in our friendships to keep us toghether.
Once, we depended on eachother because without support we would have easily fallen to the floor.
But those days have now passed us, our disillusions fallen away, and the world exposed for what it is.
They shall not notice the worried look on your face.
The way you won't show up for the last day of classes.
Later, when someone tells them your story they'll worry. Wonder what happened to make you this way.
We'll forget that we once loved you. Were your friend, lived our lives knowing you'd create our smiles.
All this goes down the drain when these labels are created.
One boy's cousin. Already hooked because of a thousand words you spoke.
So take care, Danny boy.
Take with you our best wishes.
Explore this world, as you wish
For soon enough you'll wake from your trance and realize that your life isn't worth living.
And then, maybe you'll come back. Back to your highschool. To your life before the drugs.
Take heed, and remember.

arena rating or comment please??
♥>>here<<♥

viper_353
Crew


viper_353
Crew

PostPosted: Fri Jan 21, 2011 6:55 pm


So This Is It.

There you were a little boy,
Making smiles, solving toys.
And I'm over there your insignificant girl
not knowing you'd later be my world.

Time passes and in second grade
I leave you there, turn a new page.
My parents say it's your mom's fault.
That teacher Could make pencils melt.

And now we nine years later meet
you make my palms sweat, more heart beats.
We soon make friends and become ones too.
Me from public, and you from private school.

Fascinated, in your direction I look.
Across the desks, above my book.
Could this be the son of the teacher from Hell?
Were my parents wrong? Did she mean well?

Regardless of the questions unasked
I chase after you, begin my task.
But truth is unspoken, left in memory.
A topic avoided-did you remember me?

And as with friends to movies we go
What are we scared that the other should know?
Surely you've dodged the topic enough.
But so have I. This honesty's tough.

Alas, I fear we'll never know
our silent fears. Our whispered woes.
Because, as this is our grad year
It's you saying goodbye, to get out of here.

So God bless,
Make your way out of this little town
And study your heart out,
Till in school work you drown.

You should have followed dreams
And not have left home so quick.
Cause now you're life's passing by
And I'm left out of it.

yeah, it's rhyme-y and terrible and written in 15 mintues. But I figured I should write a cheesy one AABB one and put it up just because looking around the writing arena that's what a lot of people seem to like and I might as well try!! This is about the guy I like. And how he's leaving soon. And I really don't want that to happen. Yeah, comments please?
you can find this in the writing arena >>♥here♥<<
PostPosted: Wed Mar 02, 2011 3:30 pm


bump!! smile

viper_353
Crew


Wurlee
Crew

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 02, 2011 8:49 pm


Here are my views:

Unspoken: OH. MY. GOD. THAT WAS AWESOME. I really liked that! I love it how they both like each other but it's also a tragedy.

Fallen Angel: That was sad :[ but it's a good poem, it expresses depression and hope and the same time.

So This Is It: THIS is my favorite. IT'S SO RIGHTEOUS! I voted on it C;
PostPosted: Thu Mar 03, 2011 3:08 pm


Ze Fuzzy Bunny
Here are my views:

Unspoken: OH. MY. GOD. THAT WAS AWESOME. I really liked that! I love it how they both like each other but it's also a tragedy.

Fallen Angel: That was sad :[ but it's a good poem, it expresses depression and hope and the same time.

So This Is It: THIS is my favorite. IT'S SO RIGHTEOUS! I voted on it C;

THANKYOUUU!!!! you are definaley the first person who's commented since I stuck 'em up here and I was worried that everybody just really hated my writing or something!!
Haha, yes I saw your vote!! Thanks soo much!!!! I think unspoken was my favourite out of these and I didn't like So this is it, but thankyou so much that makes my day!!! smile

viper_353
Crew


Colorful Shadows
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Sun Mar 06, 2011 6:00 pm


Unspoken: Ugh! A tragic poem, but a good poem! I need to get out more.. good job.

Untitled: That's cute!

Fallen Angels: Great. Not another sad story. Im sad right now, sorry.

So this is it: I can't explain how much I love it.
PostPosted: Mon Mar 07, 2011 7:21 pm


Colorful Shadows
Unspoken: Ugh! A tragic poem, but a good poem! I need to get out more.. good job.

Untitled: That's cute!

Fallen Angels: Great. Not another sad story. Im sad right now, sorry.

So this is it: I can't explain how much I love it.

Awwe, thankyou!!! Haha, what do you mean about getting out more??
Haha, and sorry about the sad story-ness!! Haha, highschool is full of them. sad
And awwe thanks so much!! I'm so glad you all like it. smile

viper_353
Crew


its_a_new_day
Crew

PostPosted: Tue Mar 08, 2011 2:40 pm


I like them all. Can't say much more.
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[Writing]

 
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