Welcome to Gaia! ::

I really don't care for anyone on the internet anymore. I have no attachments to anyone, and I am not friends with anyone on here, Gaia especially.

There's always celibacy. At least, for me it's a plausible option.

I'm in love with Scrumptaints, and I'm not Wylr.

None of you like me.
You like the face I put on for you guys, and the face I continue to put on. I am nothing. Nothing of interest. Nothing to like. I've done mean things, and I've felt no shame. The only sense of right and wrong I posses is from when I experienced the cause and effects of my actions clearly. I am a slave, I don't choose. I always need to be told to do things, I can't ever make my own decisions, even for trivial matters. I don't love, I obsess. I am whatever you want me to be. And I will do it gladly.
Don't you hate people like that? Don't you hate empty slates that continue- no- that are desperate for input from everyone?
I am everything that everyone I know wants me to be. To my best abilities.

I love to eat. More than anything else. It feels good, better than sex. I just want to eat non stop forever and never get full and continue to eat. I never want to have to stop to do anything else. Everything I eat would be dissolved into nothing but more energy to keep eating. I wouldn't even mind getting fat, but it would not be the best because I would want to keep eating. I would want to eat while cooking and eat while finding food to cook and eat stuff raw and eat stuff burned and be constantly consuming. I want to eat rare exotic foods like that Hakarl rotten shark stuff, or fois gras, or bird nest soup, or caviar. Also common stuff like burgers and fries and broccoli and rice and cheese and ice cream and everything. Forever. Fast food, slow roasted, baked, broiled, brazed, boiled, freeze dried, sun dried, french fried food.

&_&.....I have a sneaking suspicion that I'm responsible for #52 6_6 sorry....

I feel like we're running out of secrets to share.

@#56: What do you mean?

Sometimes I'm embarrassed of my boyfriend. People don't see what I see in him.

I don't post as often as I use to because I'm afraid of sounding like an idiot. It's also why I don't have very many friends. I'd quote someone, write a message, but decide it would make me look like an idiot and delete the entire thing.

#58- I was being facetious! I don't actually know you. Pffff!! ;D Didn't mean anythin' by it.

Sometimes I feel guilty, because I had a great childhood, have amazing parents, and am a genuinely happy person 85% of the time, and I know that this isn't the case with most other people....I'm not uppity about it, but I dunno. Guilty for being blessed. =/

#61: ******** you and your words I don't even! But like, only figuratively.

You know that new Oreo commercial, where this Ethnic boy helps a new little Nerdy white boy around school, and even shows him how to get the oreo inside that milk carton, and than that nerdy white boy helps an even smaller nerdy white boy do the same thing?
yeah, That commercial makes me cry....

#63- o.O' whuuuut?

If I see a penny with tails-up on the ground, I'll flip it over, so the next person can have good luck. =)

#65 ******** you but not literally, 'cause of the whole celibacy thing.

I am enthralled with my friend's breasts. o wo They're HUGE. Well, no, but... yeah they are. They give her back problems.

Also, boobs ARE NOT like bags of sand. Totally different. O: I hate it when people say they are similar.

I got to fondle them. ;3 Shhhhh.

I always develop feelings for guys I can't have. And when I get them I develop feelings for someone else I can't have. I'm never happy with anyone.

I am giving you this gift to get that new achievement. I am such an achievement whore.

I WAS GONNA MAKE A CONFESSION BUT NYOO I MUST URINATE WITH THE FORCE OF A THOUSAND SUN DRAGONS GOD DAMN D:

I'm only doing this for an achievement :/

I only really come on here for one person, but some of the time I start to think that they don't even like me.

I am in a sexual relationship with two different girls who both have boyfriends

I sometimes eat things off the floor after I drop them.

#73-They feel the same way about you.

I look at Porn on a semi-regular basis, and I am NOT ASHAMED!

Hi mom! I'm on the second post! 8D

I'm ninety percent sure I was molested as a child. The ninety percent is because I was half-awake before the guy stopped touching me. This actually sounds hilarious but I'm serious.

I wish I could write love letters to all of my friends every day because I love them all. I just want you guys and them all to know that I love you all the time. I want everybody in the world to wake up knowing that somebody cares about them, and sometimes I think about the people that don't feel like they are loved and it makes me cry. I really want you guys to know that even though you make me feel frustrated some times I really love you. I love you even though i've never met most of you and even if you don't love me I love you. I want you to know you are cared for and I don't want you to feel sad.

The only reason I can play and win any Zelda games, is cuz I remember how to get through them all from the First time I played, when I used walkthroughs to beat it.

Sometimes I question if you all would act IRL the same way you act online... I know for a fact I do, and sometimes I wish I could change that.

I always get this feeling that nobody here likes me but is too nice to act like they don't.

Oh my god, I had hot sex with 2 hot guys last night, and it was effin' HOT!!
No regrets. No guilt. Just Mind Blown.
....yap.

Sometimes I think all of my IRL friends just hate me but are to cowardly to say it into my face.

Confession 22. Probably in effect now

I'm all for learning what to value and what not, and what to hold high in regards to importance. I also realize that it's good to learn that your friends are more important than pixels, but Goddamn, LPS is scaring me. It's just, such a change. Why?

It annoys me when people make it ridiculously obvious that they like someone but won't just come out and say it. And also on that topic, if someone likes you and you know it but you don't like them then you shouldn't lead them on, it is cruel. Leading on meaning returning their flirting, accepting their gifts, etc.

I want to tell her how I really feel, but it would probably just complicate things.

I've had sexual fantasies about all the regulars in this guild.

I've never seen Star Wars in my entire life.

i subconsciously think I'm better than you all when the truth is i'm probably the biggest failure of all

My brother's been being a real douche lately(as in, the past year) and he left his wallet next to the computer one night. I checked to see how much money was in it. There was a bunch. I didn't take any, but part of me thinks I should have. I'd have put it to better use. He goes out to eat with his girlfriend all the time. It's such a waste. I should have taken some. I mean, he wouldn't have noticed. He doesn't pay that much attention. And it's not like I'd be doing something wrong either. He's stolen from me before. Several times. He took half of my Gamecube games and sold them for weed. I just can't call him out on it 'cause I have no evidence but I know he did it. I should have taken some.

I have a crush on all the traps.

When I was a kid I believed Harry Potter was a real person and there really were wizards in England. I still want to believe it.

I have a crush on the guy with the crush on all the traps. &3

I have so much to give but I feel like all of it's been taken. How much more until there's nothing left?

Since last December, I've been with about 16 people [/sex], and now I feel like a whore, only since my boyfriend brought it up, and is seriously bothered by it. Now I feel like even more of a whore, and now I'm not sure if this relationship is gonna work anymore.

I'm too much of a chicken to send a ℜ& confession. If I did, I know it would be way too obvious who it was.

I force myself to see the worst in everything because I'd rather feel sadness than nothing at all.

@150: I consider some people I met online my real friends. I really do. Even though I just met some, even though I lost some, er, aren't as close, after some things, I consider most people that are my friends online to be my real friends
-Wylr

I know it sounds doofy but I sometimes wish I had like a girlfriend either in real life or around Gaia so I can put their avie next to mine on my Profile and say something dumb like &wife& or &girlfriend& or whatever.
Weirdest random fantasy ever, but I want what I want.

I just wish I could fit in somewhere. Everyone has their own little clique that I can't seem to relate to. I don't mind being an introvert, but it kind of bothers me sometimes that people see that as a defect. When people actually take the time to get to know me, they see that I'm actually a kind and caring person. People can be so judgmental and it's really upsetting.

I have spent the past two weeks editing various barnyard noises into random posts. Nobody has said a thing.

Swyff really annoys me.She comes in with a 'poor me' attitude and complains about how she's used to being ignored and other stupid crap. She contributes nothing to discussion.

@155: Confessions that complain about other people really annoy me. They come in with an 'I'm the greatest' attitude and complain about how annoyed they are with people they don't even talk to. They contribute nothing to this thread.

I am ADDICTED to Mamey. It is the best fruit/apricot on earth.

Owwin, LPS (when not in sex talk mode), J, Dess, Wylr, and Hobo are my favorite people in the Maniacs. Not that I don't love all the others, I just love these six more.

I'm seriously considering quitting the Mafia. Things have gotten more dramatic than usual and I feel less and less attached to the people in it, save for a select few.

@ 159: Who do you think you are? This is the Mafia! You can't just leave! We are family. We are the Mafia! We will find you. We will get you.

@ 160: Oh, you'll find me soon enough. Because I'll be leaving a parting gift.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUHHH--

~Medeus

If this is the mafia guild, can we PLEASE do some ******** mafia games? I hate the fact that your bullshit drama and your stupid inner cliques that annoy the hell out of everyone else (yeah, I'm talking to you, LPS and Allegro) affect how the entire guild is run. Seriously, can we at least make some small effort to get mafia games going instead of BAWWing in the same threads every day?

This is going to be a long one. So right now I'm kind of in a rut. I have to make a decision and it's one that could end up hurting several people, including myself. I hate being put in these kinds of situations. No matter what I do I'll hurt someone and no matter how nice I am it'll end up hurting someone. My kindness is what put me in this situation and I'm not really sure how to handle it. I put all my cards on the table and I told them how I felt, but in the end it doesn't really matter. I guess I should clarify what this situation is but it's not like I expect advice. I just need to get it off my chest because it's bothering me and I don't really have anyone else to talk to about it. Essentially I have multiple girls that want to be with me.. and it's all because I'm a nice person. They tell me this and I tell them my situation and they say they understand. Some of them do and some of them push the situation. I then have to re-elaborate, but then I feel like a bad person because they bring up rejection. I don't want to hurt anyone, but I'm not in the position to date. I don't want to lead anyone on... I told them not to wait and I really dread the day I have to make a decision. I hate hurting people, but I feel that it would be unfair to date anyone in this state. That is all.

Sometimes I feel like I need to steal something. It doesn't matter if it is from stores or restaurants. I just get the urge to steal. I've done it before, and I know that if I do it again I will probably get caught.

I made up the barnyard noises confession. I have never done that. But after I sent it in, barnyard noises started appearing in other people's posts. The best part is that it wasn't me.

The only problem with being good at giving advice is not being able to get any from someone else. Even though I could take my own advice, I feel like it'd be nice to at least have someone to talk to and--or dump out on sometimes.

I had this real tl;dr confession written out, but I baleeted everything.

So the tl;dr version is, I'm a trap because it's what I'm comfortable with right now. I like looking like the other gender. It feels right. I'm not thinking about having a sex change, seriously that is. What I have been thinking about seriously is seeing a therapist to see if I can start with hormone therapy, at least while I'm still young.

Or do you go with your doctor? I don't know. I want to wait until I'm away from my family before this. I honestly don't think they'd understand, but I don't think they'd be surprised.

The thing is though, it's not like I'm gay or anything either. I'm still attracted to what the opposite gender of me is, and I think I always will be, I just identify with that gender a lot more than mine.

First thing's first: My family has a history of surprisingly accurate psychics. I don't know if I believe in it all, but I've certainly had inexplicable feelings/impressions about people before, and they've yet to be wrong.
Now, to get to it...there's something about Swyff that sets me off. That's not to say I dislike her, but she...I don't know. Something just seems wrong somehow. I get an odd feeling, as though she's not to be trusted, or maybe that there's something she hasn't told us. I don't understand why. I've never gotten this feeling over the internet before.
Before you say anything, it's not the weird overly-defensive bitchiness she's already displayed. I've seen that plenty of times elsewhere and never gotten this kind of response from my subconscious.
Just...be careful, Owwin. You know we care about you.

@169

Do you always get this feeling when you hear of a single mom managing to find a boyfriend?

Owwin knows exactly where he stands in that relationship, and he's obviously okay with it. He knows a lot more about Swyff than anyone else in this guild does.

@170:
Do you always attempt to call people's &bluff& when you haven't got any more or less evidence than they do?

I'm glad for them both, I am, but something's still off. It's the same feeling I get from the manipulative b***h I used to call a neighbor, before she went psycho.
To the rest of you: I can't stand psychics that proclaim they can see the future. I'm unsure of those that say they can speak with the dead. But I've seen family members pin personalities down to the tiniest habits without even seeing someone. Hell if I know whether or not it's &psychic,& but it's never been wrong. Doubt me if you will, maybe I've suddenly made a mistake, I don't ******** this anonymity, I'd rather be known. Several of you likely already know it's me, anyways.
-Cookie

@Cookie

I see. Sorry for jumping the gun and assuming such a thing, but I've seen these kinds of things happen to people close to me, and I kinda just thought it was the same thing. icon_sweatdrop.gif

So, I kinda feel like most of the guild hates me. I fluctuate in my posting, mainly because I feel like half the time people ignore me cause they think I'm insufferable. I hope I don't annoy you guys, and I'm not saying I want to fit in, I just wish I didn't feel like most people highly dislike me. No one's really said they outright dislike me (at least, on the threads), but I'm still worried, in a sense.

T is among the most attention-hungry people in the guild, and his ego is also huge. Not saying he's a bad person, just stating my opinion.

I find it difficult to sleep without masturbating. I read some things on it about it being a sleep aid, but I still find it weird.

@Dessy and 175: TMI. Seriously, I'm beginning to hate the Confessions thread now.

I appreciate T's presence in our social circle. I mean, he's not the most interesting person to talk to, but he's generally pleasant. I've never seen him create or carry on conflicts, even when he's the one being picked on. He's enthusiastic about his creative endeavors (which is as important as talent, if not more), always a good sport, and puts up with more s**t than he deserves from a lot of people, myself included. I also don't think it's that hard to find nice things to say about somebody, even if you aren't partial to them. It actually feels pretty good. Just a thought.

I'm silently detaching myself from the guild so no one will notice when I just slip away.

I appreciate Glaru's presence in the guild. He tries really hard to get along with everyone, even when it means biting his tongue. He hasn't been coming around a lot and I hope that changes when his computer situation gets better.

For the record, I gave it though, and I'm still certain I'm in the wrong gender. If given a choice at birth like someone theorized, I obviously chose the wrong gender. I doubt this is a really good obstacle in life.I mean, gender is genes. You can't choose them. I highly doubt people choose to be born with Downs Syndrome. Or any birth defects.

I ******** adore Medeus. He's so cute, and silly, and makes me smile, which I don't do too often anymore.
If only he weren't gay...

I think Allegro and Dess need to get a room and get those repressed urges out.

Yo dawgs word. I just gotta holla @ u for a sec about some bitches I been scopin' in dis guild word.

one day I was parkin my caddy at the KFC and I saw dis 1 b***h and she was so fine that i was like OH HELL YEAH and I got a date with her after her kidz get outta school

well den i drove her 2 tha movie theatre and we saw that Toy Story 3 (s**t was tight, *****) and then when we got back in the car b***h started 2 suk me off

well i was havin a good time just like that but then this cracka b***h open up my car door and starts grabbin at my balls and I was like DAMN b***h SETTLE DOWN

And then the outbreak happened.

The white b***h grabbing my balls suddenly gripped them tightly. I kicked her back in response to the pain. She fell on the concrete, face down. When she pulled herself up and looked at me, I noticed the skin of her face was missing. I closed the door to my car and drove away.

My other b***h was getting nervous as I drove to the military base near town. She said she got scratched by the white b***h. I was ready to kill her if she converted.

The base was letting in any and all civilians to protect them. A big muscly cracker greeted us at the front door. He said, &Any of you been bitten or scratched?&

b***h looked at me all nervous-like, like I was supposed to stay quiet, but I ain't ready to die. I squealed on her a** and she got shot. I was like, &DAMN CRACKA.&

The military man apologized for his actions and told me it had to be done. I understood. As much as it hurt me, I knew things wouldn't have worked out between Natasha and I anyway. I only feared for the safety of her children. It was unfortunate that we didn't have the time or gas to stop by her house.

The military man's name was Roger Smitty. He introduced me to his wife and gave me a room to stay in. The base had an exercise room, television, and offered three meals a day. All a man can really ask for.

But then one day, something horrible happened.

I awoke at 9 am to hear what sounded like glass breaking. I rushed to the entrance to see a rotting behemoth, wearing dead bodies and holding some to throw at the military men. I had no idea what it was, but I knew that we needed Roger to survive.

I burst into his room, in the middle of what looked like an argument between him and his wife. I told him of the danger and he grabbed his weapon, running out to fight.

&Watch out for my wife& he said. They were his final words.

&Alright, cracka& I responded as he left the room.

Then I started eyeing that b***h up in her night gown and she had really humongous tits. &Don't worry, I'll protect you& I said.

&Please sleep with me& she said.

and den I was like HOLLA and I whipd her wit my d**k

I ain't supposd to tell Roger tho

That Kaos is too quiet at times

Secretly, I'm gay and I'm afraid to tell anyone. I absolutely adore Medeus and Cookie. Don't tell my girlfriend. It's hard enough to hide the guild from her when she's on my computer.

I have absolutely no sex drive whatsoever. It never really bothered me until my friends mentioned how I won't have a love life. I don't love for the whole physical aspect, I love for the emotional connection and all that jazz. I think I'm asexual. I don't masturbate, I never have and apparently that makes me weird. I never have sexual urges and the thought of sex just kind of freaks me out. I've never seen a v****a. I've never watched porn.. and seeing a girl topless makes me cringe. I do like girls. I love girls.. just not in the way most guys do. I've actually been in successful relationships despite my beliefs. I'm the guy that knows how to treat a women and girls like that, but since I feel that way about sex I have no sex appeal. I'm the one that every girls would rather be friends with because I'm sweet, empathetic, and compassionate. I'm a good listener. I feel like a freak of nature sometimes. My friends think I should see a psychologist, but I think I'm fine. It just bothers me now. IS there something wrong with me? Is this really abnormal? Will it really keep me from being with someone?

I tried watching strait porn this time.
It's just as good as regular porn.

I wish I had stuff in life to confess. I feel like all my secrets are pretty much in the open, as are the majority of our fellow maniacs'.

If there are still things to be shared than this thread is being seriously under-used.
That makes me sad.
sadness