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That most certainly isn't Marth. mad

Unfortunately for me, there have only been three Fire Emblems I've actually thoroughly enjoyed (the three for Super Famicom, but Monshou no Nazo also counts for Dark Dragon, Shadow Dragon and New Mystery of the Emblem, so in a way, I guess I liked six Fire Emblems), and the FE's that I like are the ones that make me into a raging FE fanboy I am.

Now Genealogy of the Holy War (AKA Seisen no Keifu) is an interesting one, I'd say it's the most different from the entire series, storyline and gameplay wise. Storyline wise, unlike most Fire Emblems which relies on dragons, magic and sacred (oh dear God) stones, FE4 is more on the political side, even if it relies on a dark cult somewhere in there. Then gameplay-wise, everyone probably knows that unlike any other FE, this one has multiple forts to conquer, a love system and only twelve (although the maps are Russia sized) chapters. However the biggest kick in this game is you play five chapters as one army then the next five chapters you never get to touch that army again and you start as a completely different army altogether.

Don't understand the story? It's okay, 99% of everyone doesn't, me included! So, in a way, this LP is for my purposes too in the way that I hope to have a better understanding of this complex story by close analysis of the screenshots I take.

Oh yes, and Lord Sigurd is my all time favourite lord in the series, sorry Leaf, as much as I love you, Sigurd is and always will be my favourite. I really do hope you enjoy him as much as I did.

Chapter II: Not TL;DR

As the chapter title reads, I'm going to try and keep things short and sweet (hopefully, I really honestly hope I do.)



Right, so let us start this game, all I know is I'd chose boring politics over nutshell politics any day cause I'm boring like that. gonk



As you can see, things are all nice, but you see "Dark God" at the end and you can only assume the worst.



Then s**t just goes outta whack.



Then the world is saved by twelve people wielding sexy weapons.



We'll find out why Grandbell left for Issac very soon, so don't worry, you haven't missed anything (yet. D: )



Kay, so basically, some guy who was a crusader named Saint Heim totally made Grandbell and it's KING OF THE WORLD, BITCHES!



I don't even know what a dutchie is IRL, but isn't that like an offensive term to a person who is Dutch in decent or something? D:



No, they aren't fat, but they are loyal to the monarchy.



Kay, so he's head honcho of these duchie people.



And Kurth's Dad gave him the power cause he's getting old.



Byron is Sigurd's Dad, good man he is, much like his son, although it never fails to make me lolwut of how Sigurd has blue hair his Dad has grey and Sigurd's sister, Ethlin has pink. confused Then the other guy, I think his name is Ring, or it might be a title, but seriously, who the Hell names their kid Ring? :/



So, with Kurth, Byron and Ring Lord marching around like they own Grandbell (herp durp) this p***k feels like no one is paying him any attention.



So basically, these two skanks totally form some sort of coalition (insert Canadian Liberal Party and p***y Stephan Harper joke here) to try and overthrow Kurth. What can I say? Old men with monocles and big bushy beards who frown are greedy assholes in nature.



So he apparently has no idea of what's going on, hopefully you do though. ull c wut hi dyd thar ltr tho.



They just threw that in there I guess to show what a smart, wise man he is.



The land down under, where Darnians chill and Issacians plunder, did you hear, did you here that Tyrfing? You better run, you better take cover.~



Oh, those Issacians, always being asses just when the time is right. mad



Fire Emblem Seisen no Keifu/Thracia 776: not scared to talk about violent deaths.



Yes yes, so Grandbell being top of the world and s**t, they sort of get sucked into this whole shitstorm whilst Reptor and Langobalt are busy being pricks and scheme.



Full out war baby! Only, they weren't really thinking straight and were all like: "OH MAN, AGUSTRIA AND VERDANE LOVE US!" And they were wrong, stupid Empires. mad



Yup, those pricks. mad



Ie: A bunch of muscle-headed idiots who all have axes and are surrounded by nations who all use swords and magic.



They then go on to take one whole castle which a Sister is protecting (Wow, Jungby, wow..) Uh oh, looks like a little missy is going to be in a lot of trouble when her dad finds out about this... and no, Gandolf is not a wizard. mad



He does what most hot heads does and...



Goes to rescue his childhood friend who is a giant skank by the way, jus sayin'.



Obby, strap your children in, this story is just starting, that was probably the biggest Fire Emblem briefing you ever read yet, eh?



And it doesn't stop at just Verdane.

Next Chapter- actual gameplay and moar talking, I really hope this is making sense, I can say I now know what's going on instead of in my standard "I UNDERSTAND COMPLETELY" mode. <3

Chapter IV: To Bat- Wait Up!

I'm assuming that the Prologue will perhaps be one of few chapters that has me typing lots of things due to the fact of me explaining every little thing that might be foreign to an average NA player who doesn't know of all the kinks involved, hopefully I'm doing awright; would like some feedback soon on if I'm doing alright or not. gonk



Right, to war, as you can see (although it really isn't as bad as Thracia 776 was) the RNG is capable of making the impossible, possible as Sigurd got hit when he pretty much had no chance of getting hit.



This is also the first FE to introduce moving after attack with mounted units.



And because I'm just a gamblin' p***k I leave Chalphy unguarded in a desperate attempt to at leave give Arden some EXP.



Now that we spread sum' hurtin' around, let's go see what our pals, the Evans are doing.



In this game, it's not just "Player Phase", "Enemy Phase", they go as far as to make it by phase of all the armies that are dancing about and they all have their own theme song (except Sigurd who's theme changes every chapter), pretty gnarly, eh?



Apparently, a girlish knight is ******** s**t up inside on Jungby.



Then Gandolf goes and finishes him off in one critical swipe, in this game, if your allies die, they scream before they do. heart



I always thought Midir (him) was a woman for the longest of times. D:



That's basically Gandolf's reason to come over here.



And our two bosses now have names, although not for very much longer, just you wait until Sigurd and possibly (hopefully) Arden wreck the two. mad



Kinobis is his older brother and then they have a youngest brother, Prince Jamka.



Apparently, they don't see a peeved blue head riding their way, shame really..



He then marches over to the other side of the map with Aideen in his hands and ******** up our lives a little more.



Then this is the other boss who is guarding Evans, for a Prologue chapter, he's a pain in the a** to fight if you don't use Sigurd as much as you should (which I don't as Arden needs the EXP way more. D: )



Yeah, yeah, as the story progresses, many other men think that. mad



Then barbarians being barbarians, make barbaric comments. Oh shi- that's a mouthful to say. gonk



However Aideen is having none of that.



Then with that, he storms off with Aideen.



Village raids are a pain in the a** by the way, more to come. D<



At the start of our phase, new people join the fray.



Azel is the half brother of Alvis (the red headed guy in the briefing) and Lex is the son of Langobalt (the old asscrack with the beard who wants more power)



Yes Azel, fighting two whole spaced out Axefighters was just a life or death situation.



However, Lex is the kind of all brawn, no brain sort of guy.



So.. that brings the count of men after Aideen in just the prologue to.. four? (Five if you count Sigurd.)



Naw, Azel's back is just turned and all you're seeing is his hair, you silly man.



However, Azel wants none of that and presses on.



Azel: He's pretty pimp, not the best Mage, but he has a pretty good skill even if it's just one. He can also have conversation with Sigurd as you can see. Conversations can do three things: 1. Absolutely nothing, but it advances plot and let you see how characters are related 2. Boost stats in a character, usually seen in masterXpupil conversations and 3. Give them pimped out weapons and in some cases, boosts love points.



Lex: Easily one of the best Socials in the first five chapters, not only does he have the Elite Skill which makes him real easy to train, but also has one of the best base stats/growths and gets some pimped out weapons early game. Convo with Sigurd-wise, much like Azel's and anyone else in the Prologue who isn't a certain someone who hasn't spawned yet to help out, it's just plot enhancement.



Luckily, they spawn in the north end saving one village for Sigurd to travel to.



Yeah, yeah, this is the first FE that introduces the weapon triangle.



The little houses on the map, although I don't like to use it unless healers aren't by as it's good EXP for them.



It's not really a problem though. (Like any other village, he gives us a paltry sum of gold [5,000] and sends Lex on his way.



4,500 Gold, very rarely do you get good stuff from saving villages, but when you do, hoo boy, the rewards are magnificent!



At the start of Chalphy's third phase, three more people join the fray.



She may seem like a weakling, but dear God I love her.



They went to military school together or some s**t like that.



Although, personally, I wouldn't want my best friend dating my sister, just sayin'.



Then Cuan's apprentice, Fin steps in and hurries the two to battle.



So this is boss #1, and yes he's at LV.10 in the prologue, deal with it, it gets sexier.



Yeah... and we're going to kill him without the help of Sigurd or Cuan..



Cuan: I suppose he'd be the Jeigan, but really isn't as you can use most characters you want in the first five chapters and they'll turn out magnificent. Note that his lover is Ethlin, lovers work just like the standard support system boosting their stats when the two are near by, only there is more to it as in they have a child later on in life. These two are already married, but your job is to pair all the women with other men so they have children too. And no, you cannot have gay and lesbian couples sadly (unless you hack, hurr hurr..)



Ethlin: Easily the most underrated character in the game. Not only does she have a lover who is wonderful and can back her up when she's not promoted, but when she does promote, good ******** luck trying to hit her while she blasts you into oblivion with her magic sword she gets later. She's also one of few who has an A proficiency in swords letting her equip the stronger weapons from the get-go. Although it is sort of a pain in the a** to get her there and you have to rely on her "Critical" skill at some points of the game to promote her.



Fin: He's the other wonderful Social, sadly you can't use him or Cuan in the first two chapters due to the apparent axe fetish the enemies have, but once you do, lances are a magnificent thing to behold, I also just like using him just for good ol' Thracia 776 times. : P

Next Chapter- Plot enhancement conversations, Ethlin tankin' and I promise gameplay (finally). Hopefully this isn't too boring, once I explain everything, I'll focus more on gameplay.

Chapter VI: You're Hot!

Whoops, I was so busy finishing up my Dragon Quest III LP that I almost forgot about this! But don't worry, when I'm not powering it out with Dragon Warrior IV (I'm already wrecking things up with Taloon!), I'll be workin' on this. I'm already at Chapter 8 and although it might not seem very far, I only have three more chapters to go and I busted my balls getting that far. :S



Eh, the good news: the bridge's back! The bad news..



A new swarm of enemies to wreck up. : ( Oh well, one more fort to conquer and we'll be finished with the Prologue.



However on the turn of the ally phase, we have an unexpected visitor. Hey, it's that guy in the briefing who didn't know what was going on!



And being a perpetual redhead with shifty eyes, he makes crude remarks about Sigurd. mad



Right, well meet Alvis, that's one p***k who I wouldn't want to face in battle (or if he had an army gonk ) he also has major Fala blood allowing him to equip the rapestick of a fire tome called Falaflame.



In which he abruptly uses, we could just run away and let him deal with everything, but we want the EXP. D:<



For those reasons, we're going to put a stop to this crazy man before he destroys everyone and takes all of Ethlin's hard earned EXP.



No one ever has faith in me. emo



Which we will abruptly give to Ethlin next chapter via pawn system as there is no trading in this game.



After thanks and hugs and stuff like that Alvis gets straight to business, UH-OH, LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S IN TROUBLE. (Thracia 776, here we come cool ).



However, Alvis is just a doll and Azel is just a normal dramatic teenager.



With our shiny new Silver Sword in our hands and kthxbais to Alvis, we make Cuan weaken this LV. 20 p***k.



And further weaken him in a desperate attempt to give Midir at least some EXP.



I give the kill to Azel as Ethlin's Slim Sword wasn't strong enough and Azel likes to suck badly later on and get no DEF at all. mad



Apparently someone wasn't paying attention ten seconds ago. D:<



Alright, let us go eat mushrooms, get big, stomp Verdanebas and crawl down tunnels as Aideen is in another castle!



However, news travels light fast (and so do storyline characters apparently) and the King already sent an envoy to thank Sigurd.



And because of that, we are now in charge of protecting Jungby and Evans and in charge of raiding Verdane, FUUUUUUU-.



Okay, and that was the Prologue to end all Prologues! It would probably take on average if you weren't frameskipping an hour and a half to beat. D:

Next Chapter- Oh it's on Verdane, it's on, oh and there's children, arenas, pawn shops and other things.

Chapter VII: You Mean There's Actual Life Inside of a Castle?!

Oopslol, I'm going to have to make a more valiant attempt to try and finish this now since I have potential viewers even if that means I'm going to delay my other LPs I was sort of working on. (I'm so happy to be back in FEF, you don't even understand. crying )

Chapter 1 Map

Plan of assault: Since Nodion is our allies (to the left of Evans/Blue castle) we needn't worry about them thus we go in a "J" shape around this level. However, Sigurd and Ethlin (mainly Sigurd) sneak by Genoa (just south of Evans) to lay waste to Marpha (west of Genoa) and save the south-westmost village. Upon saving the village, the main force and Sigurd combine to fight and take Genoa. Since Marpha is unguarded by Sigurd and Ethlin's previous assault, it's an easy take for Sigurd. Then for the final, it's just a standard assault only with a slight surprise to come. : P



Okay, so where we last left off, we were going to lay the smack on Verdane and rescue Aideen, and forest, mounted units, you can only expect the worst in this chapter. D:



Right, so this is the apparent "Peaceful King Bantou" who just ordered his sons to raid Grandbell. Why he did it? No one knows (yet).



Right, you all should know who Eltshan is (you better know) mad he's that one guy who trained with Sigurd and Cuan at Sword School. "This one time at sword school, we dueled without swords and used pillows and wore Ethlin's clothes, it was so fun!"



Oh for- I give up, they're talking about what to do after Sigurd is done warring. mad



Just cause he wants to be in a cozy place with Sigurd doing God knows what with him whilst drinking wine. D:<
-Meanwhile in Genoa-



Right, so meet Aira, the Princess of Issac and Kinobis- the rather brute of a Prince of Genoa, Kinobis. So basically, Kinobis (who sort of looks like a generic boss from Blazing Sword) captured Aira's nephew, Shanan, the successor of the throne to Issac and forced Aira to fight or that will happen. Which a thought comes to my mind: Aira uses swords and she's overpowered and is being forced to do stuff by AXE USERS what the hell? mad Oh yes, and Shanan is a qt, and FE4 and 5 have this disturbing thing with children. gonk



And of course Aira goes into "******** YEAH!" mode and threatens him.



Everybody shits, legit faxx.



Yeah, yeah, axes and bows are overrated. mad



YAYARMYLOL, Luckily Aira isn't that suicidal and sort of stays there until you get close.



Kay, well this is our "Deployment Screen" and as you can see, we're surrounded by woods and only have two mounted-less units so you can expect this chapter to progress very slowly. D:



Right, so the silly Pawn Shop, this is FE4's way of trading. Of course it's not as convenient as standard "Trading or Giving", but it does add a challenge to things. You sell what you want to sell and..



Ethlin is now slightly (ie: deadly) stronger.



Oh man, the arena, you can only challenge it eight times a character with a pre-set list of people to fight, but I personally love the arena in FE4 (although Shark is a pain in the a** to fight in this chapter. D: )
PS: The Arena goes for a FE1 theme and uses the map theme for the intro and the battle theme for the main arena and yes, Dark Dragon has a completely different battle and map theme than FE3, 11 and 12. <3



You can also choose your weapon to fight with (which makes things a breeze with Ethlin). cool



And of course, good ******** luck trying to hit her. heart



Right, so after crashing through the Arena with Ethlin, we look at the weapon shop. In this game, since weapons are unbreakable (in a way) the shop only sells one of each weapon (ie: buy the Slim Sword, you can't buy another one)



And this is why FE4 has "unbreakable" weapons. cool So go ahead and crash the arena and only do 1DMG to an enemy at the time as you can just fix it up for cheap right after.



Ehh, no one really uses this, but it's more of a "who are you spreading your legs for?" place.



Then of course because you gotta have Anna somewhere in Fire Emblem, she is the storehouse, although it's individual in this game (ie: Sigurd can't access Azel's storehouse and so on.)



*Throws a brick at the computer monitor.* mad



Just in case you're too pussie to leave Evans unguarded (which really isn't needed in any chapters except for one[ish]).



This is kind of where Oifaye likes to sit all day everyday, and yes, there is no Master Proofs in this game, ******** yeah!

-War time!

Next Chapter- Conversations, warring, the usual Ethlin tanking and children and skanks.

Chapter IX: That is MOST Violent Lex, MOST violent

I've decided to get as much done as possible as I am in the oh so rare LP mode, maybe throughout the night, I can get to Chapter 3!



Let's start this chapter with a bang, with the gruesome 16 bit image of Lex's axe inside of Kinobis' head and with non existent blood, pus and brain spewing everywhere.



Then just cause, we pick up his blood stained axe and give it to Lex.



*Was*. cool



So back in Marpha-land, where we sort of let Dew handle things on his own (he didn't get hit for once!), Sigurd with Ethlin (somewhere behind him) come to the rescue.



But enough of that, let's see how Aideen's return to the men fares.



However, she gets straight to business and orders her man slave to help out, somehow making Midir love her more.



Naw.. King Trabant of Thracia really is, we're just taking credit.. /sarcasm.



I don't know about you, but maybe teabag girl would be hotter if she was in a short skirt (standard female warrior look in this game) and a sword..



-Insert generic skank reason-



Nope. But wouldn't being a frontier reconnaissance soldier double your chances of finding her rather than sort of confining yourself to a nunnery? confused



PS: There is like three Archers and like two at most Axefighters left cause Ethlin is just that magnificent. cool



WAIT, ETHLIN IS A GIRL, YOU CAN'T TALK TO HER! mad And no, she just wanted to help fight cause she wanted to see what a dead body looked like.



Either case, she gives Ethlin a Return Staff which will be valuable for the next two chapters.



Holy s**t, I actually got to the south-west village without it getting destroyed, I am God!



Basically, there was some Loputo/Lopto/whatever translation of it you're familiar with (ie: the bad guys) freak who got expelled to this village in the woods because he allied with the humans and he then had a lot of kids (assuming with one of his siblings) which then his children proceeded to apparently pursue the art of incest to keep the Loputo blood legit in this village cause that's how you keep holy blood pure in this game.



But then that tradition sort of died in the village (thankfully) and this girl named Sigyn was the only remaining product of freaky sex in the village so she was confined there. Being badass, she ran away and got knocked up by someone and died giving birth. But her daughter is still alive and kickin'!



Anyway, back to more Aideen whoring. Basically she's all like "Oh man, your brother will be so pissed at you running away" and Azel is all like "IKR?" but he apparently forgot when Sigurd met Alvis on the battlefielf a half an hour ago and was all like: "O SHUR SIGURD, I LUV MAI BRO, KIIP HEM SAEF, O KAY?

<********, we got too close to Genoa, RAPE FACE ACTIVATE! gonk

Next chapter- Angry women, our first castle raid, more little boys, another castle raid and sexy women!

Chapter XI: It's Never Over!



But of course before we head into the drama of new castles to raid, let's progress some plot!



Basically Cuan asks Aira why the Issiacians are being such assholes, and she blames it on some other guy in her country.



Then Prince Kurth killed her dad (the King of Issac) for no reason at all. So, butthurt about it, Aira's brother/Shanan's dad went headfirst into battle to take on the Grandbell and lost wonderfully, so here's where Aira and Shanan leave off: in the middle of nowhere for no reason at all.



We then turn our attention to the beautiful, chivalrous streets of Marpha where a man is sort of "seducing" a lady.



That's why I don't have a girlfriend. gonk



And Sigurd to the rescue! Pfft, we all know it was Ethlin who killed everyone, Sigurd just sort of sat there watching her do all the work. mad



And we have a stocker, quite a common thing throughout this game.



So is Aideen's big fat mouth. mad



But too bad Sigurd isn't so good with getting down the ladies' pants, better luck next time Siggy!



After giving Noish a dirty look, she heads on her way to the forest.



Oh hey, it's freaky sex girl's daughter!



After Sigurd is all like "I'd tap that" the old guy rehashes of how she has to only bang her siblings, but Sigurd wants none of that.



Pfft, but too bad he didn't have the Falchion. mad



Kay, so basically, Jamka finally got to talking to his dad because he's a lazy procrastinating b*****d and his dumb Father thinks Grandbell was going to invade them so he launched a preemptive strike, and here we go with the accusing of Dark Sorcerers of spreading filth yet again. D:<



He doesn't look like that bad of a guy, sure, he's sending Jamka to certain death, but it's Fire Emblem, it's unavoidable anyway!



After agreeing to send his last living son out to war, he finally gets the picture. Good God I was trying to hold my pixel RAGGGGE at the King at this part. Thankfully Sandima kills him.



Then Garnef Manfroy, the leader of this dark cult shows up and is all like "WHY DID YOU DO THATTTTTTT?" then Sandima sasses him by saying that.



PS: She's like right outside the castle in the woods, like all they need to do is tilt their heads to see outside and they'd probably see Deirdre frolicking about.



Yep, yet another disturbing rehash of what they're going to make Deirdre do with her long lost brother when they meet. Hmm... I wonder who her long lost brother is?..

Next Chapter- Kay, I promise sexy women, Aideen skankin', Sandima slappin, and probably the end of this chapter!

Cool s**t in Chapter 1



Dew- Now I went through a great effort stocking through the TCG artwork looking for a picture that would make you feel like a perv for looking at, and I think I succeeded. cool

Aideen- Thankfully I ran out of creative ways of calling her a skank.

Aira- Without a doubt, she has one of the coolest/sexiest TCG artwork in the series. redface

Dierdre- and everyone's least favourite character to use in FE4, pfft, you'll find out why I hate her so much later on. mad

Jamka- On the opposite side of the spectrum of Dierdre, everyone's favourite bow user to use in the first five chapters! Yeah, you crash through the arena with your Killer Bow. :heart



From Enemy to Friend- This is the "YOU SHOULDN'T BE FIGHTING THIS PERSON battle song as it's what plays when you fight Aira/any other recruitable character, still badass nonetheless. PS DO NOT LOOK AT THE SUGGESTION BAR AS IT CONTAINS A MAJOR SPOILER OF WHO YOU FIGHT LATER ON! mad

Arena (Entrance)- Skip to about :30, IT'S CLASSIC DARK DRAGON BABY! FE3 AND 11 CAN SUCK IT, I LOVE MY FE1 MAP SONG. heart (if you want a comparison, in the suggestion bar, there is a link to the original FE1 map song.)

Arena (Match)- Of course, going with the FE1 theme, they also do the battle theme in a badass bass arrangement.

Army of Agustria- Kay, remember that butthurt Elliot? This is his and his prickly nation's phase song.

Girl of the Spirit Forest- Sigurd Phase, too uppity for war music, IMO, but it's still pretty.

Ally Phase- YAY, ELTSHAN AND ACTUAL MUSIC I CAN SEE A WAR TAKE PLACE IN!