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Colorful Shadows
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Wed Dec 29, 2010 1:25 pm


I walk outside, the clouds look gray,
to me, it feels like a beautiful day.
But all of a sudden, the sky turns black,
I get some feeling that I should go back.
Just then, it starts to rain,
and BAM! I feel so much pain.
I wake up, I see my family smile,
all though I don't think I will stay for a while.
The doctor said I will probabaly die,
I see my mother start to cry.
I close my eyes, and then I see,
a white sheet, coming toward me.
As I start to wonder why,
I then realized that I am meant to die.
Life has happiness, life has pain,
but this death wasn't by plain out rain.
I was struck by lightning,
and it was very frightning,
to both me and my family.
I am mad
my family is sad;
why did God do this to me?
PostPosted: Wed Dec 29, 2010 1:26 pm


I wrote this poem not because I am emo, because I know that life really only has one beginning and one end. We never know when it will end, but until it does, we must live life the fullest.

Colorful Shadows
Vice Captain


its_a_new_day
Crew

PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 2:15 pm


Great poem, but depressing.
PostPosted: Sat Jan 08, 2011 2:43 pm


its_a_new_day
Great poem, but depressing.


I think that's a thanks.

Colorful Shadows
Vice Captain


Lets_Save_The_Earth

PostPosted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 5:22 pm


I love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PostPosted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 6:05 pm


COMMA SPLICING!! gonk
But Im not a grammar natzi so I don't really mind ^ u^


I like the themes of your poem, but it could use some flavor. Like be more descriptive, and using "sad" and "mad" is a little third grade isn't it? o 3o

Fluffeh Whip

IRL Kitten

16,700 Points
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Colorful Shadows
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 6:09 pm


Coolio Fluffy Whip
COMMA SPLICING!! gonk
But Im not a grammar natzi so I don't really mind ^ u^


I like the themes of your poem, but it could use some flavor. Like be more descriptive, and using "sad" and "mad" is a little third grade isn't it? o 3o


Yeah, I guess so.
PostPosted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 6:23 pm


I just accepted your invite and joined the guild. I decided to make my first stop to read your poem. biggrin

UnoriginalSin1753

Familiar Werewolf

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[Writing]

 
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