[PRP] I sense something blah blah.... (Christof and Barth)

[Bilious]

Auditions? Christof had been in school now for a few days, classes hadn't started yet for him, and so he had been keeping himself busy making new friends and exploring, which had been educational enough. At the sight of the "mandatory auditions" sign, the patchwork's mind had begun to turn. He had seen this play before, years ago, when accompanying his Master once to a theater. It had been a grand production, no expenses spared, and somehow he knew the school play would not live up to the memory in his mind's eye.

And yet.... a feeling of excitement bubbled up in him, gripping his chest and throat like an oncoming fever. He wanted to be a part of it, he wanted to be involved *so badly*- alas, singing was not his strong point. But maybe.... maybe there was another way he could contribute. Another way to get attention instead of hiding in the shadows at the rear of the auditorium while everyone else cheered and laughed and had a good time... He had other talents, after all. And so, inspiration driving him forward he set about the place in a mad hunt for supplies.

He found plenty of sticks along the edge of the forest, (Going INTO the forest had proven tricky, and so he made due with what he could find), and even came across some burlap someone had thrown out after finishing their own costume. With enough remnants it would be plenty- He was a master seams-man... how many times had he had to reattach his own limbs?

Bits from here, pieces from there, all small things no one would notice (he hoped) and the thief spent the entire weekend locked in his dorm building.... Oh yes, he'd give this Audition a whirl, but the problem lay when the sound track was concerned.

The library had plenty of books and scripts and recounts of the now age-old play, but no pre-recorded sound tracks. No cassettes, SkeeDees, or even a video of the play to utilize some sort of background. HELL ON A CRACKER. How was he supposed to continue? Hum the stupid songs? No one would be convinced by that.

Forlornly, he continued his hunt for SOMETHING that could help finish up what he considered a brilliant audition in the making. He tugged the wagon he had found, filled to the brim with his contraption along the pathways trying to find a remote area where he could set up and practice at least.  

[Toshihiko Two]

Mandatory auditions. As in required. As in undodgable by regular means. Skipping the play (or at least the audition process) was apparently out of the equation.

So Bartholomew had a plan. It was, as far as he was concerned, a very good plan.

He had briefly considered a Zero audition, which meant putting a sheet over his head and standing there. He wouldn't even have to bother about eye holes. But the terrifying thought occurred to him that he might actually get the part, which meant an entirely different level of hassle. So he grabbed a script and a mop and headed somewhere secluded to ensure the audition would be as awful as he hoped.

The script went in one hand, and the mop went on top of his head as an impromptu and smelly wig (his entire costume).

After selecting a spot and arranging himself in a proper lounging position, he cleared his throat and after a brief warm up

Do
Re
Me
...candlejack it.

With a surprisingly clear voice (probably the only ounce of charm the lazy demon possessed), he sang his own personal rendition of the lyrics.

I sense there's something blah blah crap
Who even cares about this story
And though I'd like to take a nap
This stupid play is mandatory.

While Barth had a winning baritone, the deep vibrato was ill-suited for Jack's shy love interest. Calculatively ill-suited. Besides, every pretty, talented, and actual girl in school would be trying out for Sally. He was confident that this was a roll he was safe from being billed as.  

[Bilious]

As Christof made his way past the cemetery he and G had had such a lovely romp in a few nights ago, his steps slowed at the sound of singing.... well, the lyrics were awful and entirely not what had been written, but there was something about that baritone... Dear Jack in a Pumpkin Patch it would be PERFECT! He hurried to the grassy knoll, dragging his cart behind him before spying the demon in the terrible wig who seemed to be doing everything in his power (albeit it very simply) to do a horrendous job.

After a few moments of listening to the half-arsed rehearsal, he gingerly made his way down the hill towards the singing demon, pausing to applaud enthusiastically only a few yards away.  

[Toshihiko Two]

Barth looked over, strands of mop still danging over his eyes.

"Was it that good?" He asked, tone bordering on despair.

"Here, err, stitch-thing. How about this?" He switched the notes to something sinister, clearly using a demonically intimidating bark he had learned from somewhere. The lyrics were straight from the script this time,

The worst is just around the bend!
AND DOES HE NOTICE MY FEELINGS FOR HIM?
And will he see how much he MEANS TO ME?
I think it's NOT TO BE.

Sung like threats, the lyrics were...distinctly out of place.

 

[Bilious]

Christof shook his head, practically running over to him now as he dragged his cart behind him and dug in his pocket for his script before letting go to open to the dog-eared page he had highlighted the lyrics on, holding it out to him urgently, eyes above his scarf glistening with hope and wonderment.  

[Toshihiko Two]

"Err, yes. That would probably be more suited for that. But you see, I am not actually trying to get a role."

It was very kind of this hodgepodge fellow to want to help. Barth very seldom turned down volunteers. But the end goal here was not to be suited for, or Jack forbid, enrolled in anything.

"What about for Sally? Do you think it's awful for Sally? The desired reaction is horror, not applause."  

[Bilious]

Christof shook his head again, brows furrowing as he pointed to the script, pointed to the demon, and then pointed to himself before finally pointing to the bundle in his cart with some enthusiasm, as though that was supposed to explain everything. Trying out for Sally? What was this guy, a fool? Possibly a dandy? Who the heck knew or cared. He had the voice Christof needed! If only he'd play along...  

[Toshihiko Two]

"No? No it's not suited for Sally. Yes, good. Me? You want me to...get in your cart?"

Barth looked at the cart skeptically. He was already lounging and didn't particularly feel like rearranging himself.

"It seems a bit...wobbly."  

[Bilious]

Christof glowered, balling his fists before shaking his head. He turned to his cart before lifting the thing inside, trying to prop it up half-assembled so Barth could see. It involved cranks and sticks and string and burlap, but the overall effect was very.... obvious. With a pull of a string, the thing sprang to life, and Christof gave a short demo before pointing to the demon and pointing to the contraption, an anxious, muffled humming whine escaping him.

He moved his hand like a puppet to show a moving mouth and then pointed to himself with a shake of his head, and then on one final exasperated attempt pointed to Barth with a flourish of enthusiasm and back to the contraption once more. How much clearer could he get??  

[Toshihiko Two]

"Oh no," The demon said. "...No, no, no-no-no, no. Absolutely not. There would be rehearsals. And line-memorizing. An entire plays-worth. That's practically a main role. And hours and hours of people flubbing their lines, and having to redo it all over again. And being on time for who knows how many performances. I'd probably have to... skip....class...."

Barth hesitated.  

[Bilious]

Christof's eyes gleamed hopefully, hands going together in a pleading motion as his contraption folded back down on itself to fill his cart once more. Ah, that would explain his terrible choice in roles to try for... He pointed to the demon before propping the device up once more to crouch behind it, illustrating that it would at least save half the work- he wouldn't have to wander about stage, all he would have to do is hold the script and read the lines and occasionally sing. He wouldn't even have to memorize them! He offered the script up to the demon eagerly.  

[Toshihiko Two]

Ah, that's right, he wouldn't have to memorize anything at all, would he? Barth looked into Christof's eyes.

Those big, pleading, mismatched, eager, hardworking eyes.

"Alright," he said, finally. "You do the Boogie, I do the Oogie. But I'll be expecting you to make recompense."

With great deliberation, he relieved the hunchback of the script with one hand, and offered him the other.

"Deal?"  

[Bilious]

With excitement and fervor, the Hunchback took the demon's hand to shake it enthusiastically. The perfect solution!! They were going to kill, he just knew it!  

[Toshihiko Two]

There was a brief, muted crackling sound, and a peculiar tingling feeling on Christof's shoulder.

"Alright, alright, yes yes, we're all very excited," Barth withdrew his hand, shaking it out limply.

If they didn't get the part, it was only 10-odd lines. If they did, Barth was going to milk the contract for whatever it was worth. A month of homework, at least.  

[Bilious]

As the crackling lifted, Christof's expression drooped a bit in confusion. What was that? The tingling grew worse, itching and then hot, like something being branded onto him and he stepped back to pull his scarf and collar away from his smaller, more humanly proportioned shoulder to see what had happened... There, burned into the pale patch of skin, centered between the stitches around it was a series of circles with a pentagram within, punctuated by strategic dots, symbols and curls... the mark of a demonic pact. Well, normal people would have been horrified. Normal people would have instantly regretted what had just transpired. Normal people would have known how dangerous it was to make deals with demons. Christof, though, glanced back up at Barth with a look of wonderment. To him, this mark meant only one thing: a nice, stable job! Suddenly, the idea of a NEW master occurred to him, and it would seem this lazy demon was at the top of his own personal audition list.

Before knowing what he was doing he lunged forward to give Barth a tight hug, pinning the Avarice demon's arms to his side as he squeezed with glee.