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How do you know if you have asperger's?

I am 20 years old (fun age in itself -sarcastically-) and I have reason to believe I have asperger's.
I don't act or think like normal people my age do. And since the term "normal" is used loosely now a days I''ll go ahead and specify.
I can't seem to care much for people.
Not that I don't care about them-I have people I hold close like everyone else. And i know I care for them (despite what others may say)
But if it ever come to conforting them, to knowing the right thing to say or do I'm lost. (and at the same time when it comes to advice that is only logical I'm good. Because emotions barely ever come into play)
Social manerism and things that come naturally to people are lost on me as is human emotion sometimes. I don't understand why people cry when they're upset or happy or why they may react to things the way they do. It all feels foreign.
I don't understand why things may be a big deal and particurally relationship protocols go completelly over my head and have to be explained to me sometimes more than once.
Needless to say high school? (the whole u only do this and that with them because of this and that?) was an utter enigma for me.
Also-maybe as a result of this or maybe it just supplements it. I am a bit..naive. I don't always think like someone my age. There is more to this but I don't know that I know how to explain it right.(another thing, I can't always talk to people, or explain what's on my head.)

I am not exceptionally smart-and if you ask my teachers they will vouch that I wasn't the best student in the lot but I do tend to focus a lot on things that I'm intersted in...and not on everything else (which is kinda how I ended up not being the best student in the lot >w>)

I don't do it on purpose like most people believe. I am not cold or mean or uncaring. (..I think)
It took me sometime to sort out that my brain actually just works like this. And even longer to consider the fact that I may (or may not) have asperger's. i hate that I can't be of help to those I care about and it's not even for a lack of effort.
The first time especifcally I remember being unable to help someone who was upset I was 9, i froze when that person started crying and just stood there with my mind somewhere else. Later when someone else who was also there asked me what was wrong with me(why hadn't I tried to help) I didn't answer. I didn't know. And that wasn't the last time it happened.
I'm aware that even if I research the signs. Few people know the reality of asperger's and that it affects people differently. That is why I am posting this. If anyone out there knows wether or not there's a chance I may have it or if there's a way for me to know reply.
Please do not flame me, i'm not trying to upset anyone with this, I just want to know. this is starting to affect my life and since my family doesn't elieve in asperger's(yes you read that right) so I've decided I have none to loose and much to gain by asking annonymously on gaia.
How do you know if you have asperger's?
How do you know if you should get diagnosed?
That is all.

The fact that you seem genuinly perplexed is a pretty strong indication.

I was diagnosed after I was twenty but before I turned 30. It helped me with my issues.

Hey, check out The Aspie Quiz. I realize that it isn't a diagnosis, or conclusive proof that you have Aspergers, but it does ask a lot of questions that might help you understand yourself a bit more, and it will give you a general idea at least as to what extent and how this affects you.

I suggest talking to the psychiatrist about your social problems and difficulties with feelings and people. From experience (;_ wink I've found that actually mentioning Aspergers makes the person think that you're just trying to get attention or that you're delusional. I have VERY painful memories of that.