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[Enrollement!!] - Nefertari the Sphinx (Accepted/) Goto Page: 1 2 [>] [»|]

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Byagane319

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 14, 2010 10:12 pm


AMITYVILLE ACADEMY ENROLMENT FORM

Name: Nefertari
Nicknames: Neffy, Tari
Gender: Female
Age: Several hundred, a woman never tells, but she looks like a 16 yr old.

Faction/Race Monster, she's a sphinx

Personality
I'm too sexy for... - Tari is very pretty and has a body to match. Her clothes always show off her curves and she has no doubt she is beautiful. No one can tell her any different, at least no one who wants to keep their blood inside their body. She's not above flirting with whomever, male or female. She works out a lot and plays Roughby with some of the other girls. Keeps her fit and its wonderfully violent. Rawwwwwr.
Riddle me this - Tari has a thing for riddles. Ok its not a "thing" its a freaking obsession. Her parents used riddles to constantly test her, both in life and in education. Sometimes her birthdays would be a treasure hunt with plenty of riddles to solve. Other times she had to prove she did her homework with a series of riddles that showed whether she had mastered the material. Her parents instilled the idea that if you couldn't prove your intelligence you shouldn't be considered intelligent. So now she shares in that view, riddling people and judging their intelligence. However she has far less patience than her parents and tends to get rather violent when constantly given the wrong answer.
Battle lust - Despite her sexy strut Tari LOVES to fight. Letting out a roar and unsheathing her claws is the best feeling in the world to her. This caused a lot of problems at home when she would fight with her older siblings. Blood was always spilled and she always found herself in the corner of the pyramid; which is terribly uncomfortable. But if you enter into a fight with Tari, be prepared to come away with a few more scars and a bit less blood than you walked in with.
My beautiful face!!!! - Like Egyptians of the past, Nefertari loves to look pretty all the time. It's a constant conflict with her natural violent personality, which doens't want to scuff up her loveliness. So she's pretty good with make up to hide any cuts or bruises. But if it gives her a sexy appeal, like a small cut on her cheek, she might let it go.....until it looks all scabby and gross!! Then comes the make up!

Why are they enrolled in Amityville Academy? For one thing she loves to learn so learning anything is for her! She's mostly interested in Gym Class and human studies. She might also like Literature. Also her parents think it will help her be more social if she meets other monsters.

FEAR: .....I know..... - Using her FEAR Tari can create an aura around herself that causes her target to think she knows their deepest secrets. Whether or not she does is never clear, but her feline smile always seems to suggest she does. In battle this can cause hesitation (losing a turn) or affect the concentration of magic users. For humans, it causes severe mental stress including minor paranoia, lack of sleep, and even panic attacks depending on how strong the aura is.

FEAR weakness: This takes a lot of focus so she has a chance of missing. If she can't keep her concentration up during her attack its ineffective and she has to try again. But it can get harder if she uses her power in a short period of time on the same target.

Natural Ability: Being a Guardian Animal Tari has a slight immunity to hexes and curses. After all she was meant to guard things that HAD these things on them sometimes. But anything beyond beginner's level can hit and affect her. About 30% of attacks miss her. She can bump that up to 60% WITH TIME AND HARD WORK + GETTING TO AT LEAST 3RD YEAR, 60% is the MAX she'll be able to get up to, EVER. Otherwise she hates magic unless its being used by her mummy friends, then it's cool.

Physical Description: Feline features decorate this beautiful girl. Yes she's pretty and damn is she hot! But in a creepy kind of way. Cat ears poke out of her hair, her eyes are slitted like a cat's, and she has some scary looking fangs. Her hands and feet are more paw-like with razor sharp claws like in the first picture. A lion tail swishes back behind her. On her back is a beautiful pair of black and tan feathered wings which allow her to soar through the skies with the greatest of ease. It also helps her pounce unsuspecting victums.
Eye Colour: Beautiful midnight black eyes, she also loves to wear typical egyptian style make up around her eyes
Hair Colour/Style: Long braided black hair and an ankh headband that goes around her forehead. Its very typical egyptian style like the second picture.
Skin Colour: light chocolate skin
Clothing Style/Colours: Tari likes the punk style of clothing with an egyptian bent. She's never without her Ankh headband as she feels it provides protection from the spirits.
Extra: Tari plays Roughby, a brutal sport that seems to combine running with a ball and beating other people up. She's one of the few girls who likes to play and she uses any crushes the boys have on her against them. Give blood, play Roughby.
References:

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PostPosted: Sun Aug 15, 2010 3:07 pm


Added a bit and ready!

Byagane319

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Byagane319

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 16, 2010 2:57 pm


*pokes her quest towards the top*

Also gave her fear a weakness
PostPosted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 7:46 am


I has a poll!

Byagane319

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Byagane319

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 7:48 pm


*pokes her quest back up top for reviewing*
PostPosted: Fri Aug 20, 2010 11:58 am


Your FEAR is something only YOUR character can do and it seems you're mixing that up with 'Natural Ability' like you did on my quest-crit. As well, your FEAR description is rather...jumbled. I don't even see a FEAR ability in there but just how she gets stronger and you added something about riddles pretty much randomly.

Perhaps you should start on the idea, what you'll base your FEAR on, and then elaborate on it. Such as the Riddle thing; all Sphinxes are riddle loves but what does Neffy do with them that is DIFFERENT from others of her kind?

You also need to add a FEAR weakness, which you probably should think about after you have a solid FEAR down.

Souru

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 20, 2010 12:05 pm


Personality: Like I got a couple crits on mine should give some reason for why her personality is the way it is. You might want to also separate the different parts like I will be doing so it is easier to read.

Fear: You seem to want to like her riddles with her power so why not use that. You can have the riddle be a power boast or lost.
Example: The opponent is asked a riddle but answers wrong or refuse to answer she gains more power and each riddle answered right can be a power gained. Or like some type of attack.
The fear also needs a weakness that could be the answering the riddle right could drain her some.
PostPosted: Fri Aug 20, 2010 12:08 pm


I actually changed it to match more of what her kind of monster represents instead of her riddles. I'll make the riddle thing more of a quirk.

Byagane319

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lizbot
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No Faun

PostPosted: Mon Aug 23, 2010 2:56 am


"Well, well," Hellma mused, folding the acceptance form into a paper football. "Riddle me this: what is black and brown and ridiculous all over?"

The Bin went long, and the professor expertly flicked the piece of paper into it's gaping maw.

"Well?" She repeated the question.

In response, the Bin belched out a few dark feathers.

"It is exactly so."
PostPosted: Tue Aug 24, 2010 3:34 pm


Stil wanting of the crits for her personality and such. Her FEAR is approved so I can't change that

Byagane319

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PostPosted: Sun Aug 29, 2010 6:41 pm


Her personality makes me think of like the ulitimate scary pretty girl,

If she is vain about her looks, does she worry about being hurt in all the violent activities that might mar her pretty face? If so, Do you think she would develop some kinda of anti something to make sure when she does play it rough that she doesn't get scuffed up in her face?

You could play that in her own kind of fear of herself, Because even though tye are creatures that go bump in the night, they need a fear of their own LOL

Enrolled is pretty solid, I like simple reasons xD

Fear is approved but i thought i would add that i like it

Physical fits her to a T

All in all she looks awesome, i would give her one more quirk just to even out

Cause i love even out things /says the person with the quirkest character after all/
PostPosted: Sun Aug 29, 2010 6:50 pm


Good point!

I added that she has a need to wear make up to cover up the worst of any of her battle marks.

Byagane319

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Pixie Nyxie

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PostPosted: Sun Aug 29, 2010 6:56 pm


BAM she is solid then OwOb

GOOD LUCK DARLING
PostPosted: Tue Aug 31, 2010 8:04 am


*pokes to the top*

Byagane319

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Byagane319

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 20, 2010 8:55 pm


*pokes this to the top for more crits*
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