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 Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 4:09 pm
It started when Lisi had Hamamu and worsened when Biski had Mkate.. and though he tried to act completely normal, Manuku was not being a very good actor- or a very good, supportive father. He acted almost like he was afraid of the cubs, and avoided their mothers more now..
And avoiding everybody was what his plan was for the day, it was getting pretty awkward with everybody scowling at him for being so childish, and it seemed worse when they tried to be encouraging.. So he was off for a walk, trying to be unpredictable. He didn't go to the waterhole, he didn't go tot he river, he didn't go anywhere near the dens of any family members.. but that left very few places he could go, he realized.
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Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 4:20 pm
Over the past little while, Zi was slowly developing an ever so slightly bitter streak. Deep down, he'd always wanted a family, and he was starting to face the fact that he had yet to manage that. On top of that, he hadn't gotten over his mother's taking off. And of course, he never ever had gotten over his extremely large family. He loved them, yes, but it was hectic sometimes. Maybe that was why he didn't like socializing. He got enough of it at home.
Of course, nothing goes as planned. As he was sneaking along, he spotted a familiarly bright blue mane. "Manny." He straightened out a little, but not completely. He wasn't feeling his confident self today. He supposed, though, seeing his brother wasn't a bad thing.
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Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 4:48 pm
While not looking quite as anti-social as Zi (Manny figured it would make him look more suspicious and thus approachable in a backwards kind of way).. Manny wasn't looking entirely agreeable to company. He might never have noticed his brother if the small, sneaky steps hadn't changed and he hadn't straightened up. The changes caught his attention. He stopped and he stared.. and after some quiet deliberation, he decided his brother would not be the worst one to chat with. And he'd obviously been spotted, it would be more trouble to make a run for it or something stupid like that. So he turned and started out towards Zi.
"Hey," he called out.
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Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 5:00 pm
Zi considered asking his brother how he was handling his situation, but didn't want to tempt the subject. He was well aware of how Manny felt about his daughters and their pregnancies. He couldn't really imagine how he would feel if his own daughters - well, old boy, let's not get ahead of yourself! You have to actually have daughters before that would become a problem. He glared in Manny's direction, but it wasn't directed at the brother. It was more directed at his own thoughts. Stay positive, he thought to himself.
"Hey, Man." His voice was much more glum than he had originally meant it to be, causing him to look off to the side and clear his throat awkwardly. "Ummm... How's it going?" He looked around them. They were... no where interesting at all. With no one around. He surveyed the looks of his brother, which was not much better than himself. NOT that Zi ever looked bad - His fur was always in a state of glowing pristine. He just wasn't oozing his usual amount of confidence.
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Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 7:25 pm
Manny noticed immediately that something was up with Zi, he was definitely not usually this sulky and it was clear he wasn't going to be a great deal of fun.. but neither was Manuku so it was almost better that way. Someone annoyingly cheerful would have been, well, annoying. He didn't make any effort to brighten up and instead took a seat once he was a reasonable distance from his brother, offering a sheepish smile.
"N-not much, I guess," he answered with a slight shrug, looking Zi up and down, "What are you doing out here?"
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Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 11:00 pm
Zi sighed dramatically and slumped into a sit. Manny wasn't in the best of moods. Of course, his young daughters were running crazy. Zi had no way of relating to his brother's problem, but he did feel for him. The situation had obviously taken a tole on him. Even if Zi was jealous for the fact that at least Manny had managed to procreate, he did understand that his brother wasn't too happy right now. And since he himself wasn't very happy either, well, misery loves company, right?
"Oh. I don't know. Hiding." He looked around them. The term was much too extreme for his situation, but it was how he felt. He had little desire to run into anybody. That won't fix your problem, he thought to himself. You can't find a girl if you never get out there and try. But in all honesty, Zi wasn't sure if he could land him a girl anymore. He used to be absolutely positive he'd have to be turning the ladies down due to his fine looks. Clearly, that wasn't the case. What gives? "How are the girls? I've been... hiding. I haven't seen them in a little while."
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Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 10:29 pm
He snorted when Zi's answer was about the same as his would have been. Manny was hiding, and it didn't seem too dramatic to him- though he did wonder what exactly it was Zi was hiding from. He'd been far too distracted and self-involved lately- and he was starting to realize it. Had he missed something major in his brother's life?
His curiosity (and attempted smiles) stopped as soon as Zi asked about the girls. The frown he so often wore now returned.
"They- they're fine, just fine," he muttered, "Hamamu is excited she's not the only small one now."
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Posted: Mon Aug 30, 2010 7:08 am
Zi was quite pleased with pushing the attention off himself and onto more... pressing matters. "That's good." He thought fondly of little Hamamu. Though it brought his brother a fair bit of despair that his children had gotten pregnant so young - and so single - Zi was honestly happy to see little ones around. Well, when he saw them, that is. He wasn't sure how he'd feel when he hopefully had his own some day (they seemed a bit of a burden) he did find the presence of little ones to be uplifting. He also found it to be a bit annoying, but more because he was annoyed he didn't have his own family yet.
"Maybe there will be more soon." His voice was wistful, maybe a little wishful, but not entirely serious. He himself had no candidates for children. Though there were probably a million relatives of his currently able to have children. So, in reality, there would most likely be more soon and forever more into the future. "Y'know, you're lucky."
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Posted: Fri Sep 10, 2010 3:29 pm
"Maybe," Manny mumbled, but he didn't sound so wistful. His first thought was his other daughters having babies, too, but there were other pairs in the family planning to have cubs. Dad was one. But that wasn't what he was thinking. And he started when suddenly Zi said he was lucky. He wasn't feeling very lucky.
"What? Why?"
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Posted: Mon Sep 13, 2010 5:04 pm
"You have healthy daughters." He shrugged his shoulders. "Your cubs - despite they're... antics - are alive and well. I know your stressed but just look at them." He looked over Manny's shoulders as if staring at his children, though they weren't there, of course. He didn't know how to word how he felt about this. He understood why his brother was stressed, but he also believed his brother should be proud to have that family in the first place. Maybe Manny just needed to back away from the situation, see it from a new point of view.
"And, you're a grandpa." He did manage to keep a laugh from happening, but he did smirk. Though he definitely thought his brother had something to be proud of, he did think it was maybe just a little funny that he was already a grandpa. Where as Zi was not even a father yet.
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Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2010 8:40 pm
Manny knew the problem with his feelings, but knowing it only made it worse. He had never really been a good father, and he thought it was awful that it was Hamamu who made him realize that because, however awkward it was for him, he did love her, too.
"Alive and well, but I can't say I've ever been a good father," he muttered. He thought of Habu, who'd always tried to set good examples and despite his record with mates and cubs, he must have been doing a good job because none of his kids were just out having babies with strangers.. except him. And Habu had been supportive of that, and Manny could barely be supportive of his girls. Realizing he hadn't been much of a father made him an even worse father and the struggle to get out of the self-centered pity party was impeding doing something about it.
His ears turned when Zi smirked and called him a grandpa.
"Why isn't it easier to find a mate and have a normal, happy family?" he grumbled, "I mean, it even took dad three tries." Kind of.
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Posted: Tue Oct 05, 2010 4:31 pm
Zi decided not to comment on his brother's parenting skills. He simply stayed silent while Manny complained and let it out. Not only was Zi not going to judge his brother's parenting skills, he was also not a father. And because of that, he had absolutely no basis to compare. Of course, they had the example their own father had set, but since he'd yet to experience the ups and downs of parenthood, he felt like he wasn't in much of a position to think either bad or good of Manny's job with his children. There were obvious things... the guilt, the young pregnancy... but Zi didn't necessarily consider those things that meant bad parenting.
A normal, happy family. That one hit home. Zi shook his head. On the one hand, his parent and step parents and siblings and half-siblings were hardly normal. For the most part - they were happy sometimes, at least. Right? And why wasn't it easier to find a mate, anyway? "You'd think it'd be easy enough. Look how big the pride is." His voice was dark now. Zi felt like he grew lonelier and more melancholy on a daily basis. His head slumped downward. "At least you found someone who thought you were interesting enough to make babies real quick." He sighed. He'd take that right now. At least Manny wasn't alone.
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Posted: Sat Dec 11, 2010 4:57 pm
When Zi commented on how Manny had found someone who had been interested enough to have cubs with him, he couldn't help but make a face. He loved his daughters but that had hardly been a plan or an entirely happy experience. At least getting up to the point of the cubs being born was mostly a frantic mess.
"Why would you envy that?" he said, disbelieving. He would have loved to be a real family, maybe he wouldn't have messed that up as badly as he did this. It just didn't feel much like an achievement this way. If he hadn't had such a huge family full of other cubs, he might never have been interesting to them at all. And he couldn't take credit for the rest of his family.
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Posted: Sat Dec 11, 2010 5:11 pm
Kimbizi sighed heavily, tiring of the topic. He didn't talk to anyone about this kind of thing. Of course, it might've been obvious to plenty that he was upset about something because of his mopey ways lately, but he certainly didn't ask anyone how they felt about the situation or try to talk it out. "Because you get to have a family, Manny." He looked at his brother somewhat unsteadily, but then let his eyes drop. The effort of saying how he felt was enough that it drained him of whatever he would've used to keep eye contact.
"I know it's a little weird. Especially with..." He was about to say the grandcub but decided to skim over it instead of bringing the sensitive topic BACK up again. "Well, it's just something, that's all. I'd love to be a father. And you're a GOOD father." He twitched his lip a little and drew a circle in the dirt with a claw. This was making him a little uncomfortable. He wasn't the type to talk about feelings like this.
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Posted: Sat Dec 11, 2010 5:23 pm
"I wouldn't let it happen again," he said sharply, clearly not absorbing any of the attempted compliments, his own muddled emotions on the subject emerging as frustration now, "Not like that. It's hard to be a good father like that, maybe if I was better at it my girls wouldn't be so unconcerned about their cubs not having fathers."
Perhaps they'd finally come to the point that upset Manuku most about the situation he was in. His daughters didn't think their cubs needed a father, or .. it didn't seem upsetting that they wouldn't have one. Clearly it didn't seem like it would make much of a difference if he hadn't been there.
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