A Short Intro Story for Swabblechops, the Less Powerful!

[Amaterasu3531]

Ok, I have decided to write a short story about 'swabblechops'. I liked pyro's idea of a story, it's easier than explaining my person more indepth in races. I doubt it will be as long or as good as pyro's story, but i really don't care razz

Please do not attempt to add anything to the story, and if you MUST comment you may.
Chapter One: Swabblechops the Insane Bartender...?

Swabblechops had decided that tonight, he would tend the bar in his pub. The night was going fairly normally, until he pulled out a strange bottle with an odd colored liquid in it and began drinking glasses of it.
A man sitting at the bar wanted to know what he was drinking, he had never seen swabblechops in the bar before and wanted to get to know him better. " Hey, whatcha drinking there? You're really drinking it fast!"
"Cobra Venom," Swabblechops replied very monotonously as if drinking cobra venom was NORMAL. He then continued drinking.
"WHAAAAA!?!?!," the man said startled," your kidding right!?!?"
"No," he shows the man the label," It tastes AMAZING! You should try some!"
The man who was in a bit of shock replied," is-is-isn't that poisonous?"
Swabblechops gave the man a funny look," Of course it's poisonous, i thought that was implied when i called it 'venom'." He then poured himself another glass.
".... then won't it KILL you!?!"
"oh... well no. It won't kill me. I'm immune to poison, infections, and deseases," he laughs," I could outdrink anyone on the entire planet!" Then a thought seemed to come to his head," Oh, your worried about trying it because it will kill you. I guess that makes sense..."
".... Well yeah, death isn't on the top of my to-do list. Uh... how did you become immune to that stuff?"
"Uh... genetic mutation?"
" Yeah... ok..." the man stared at swabblechops suspiciously.
"OH! I know how you can try it!" Swabblechops took the man's glass of rum and put one drop of the venom in it. Then he grabbed another bottle out of the cabinet, spun it around his fingers, and put two drops of it in the glass. "There! That one drop should be enough to flavor the entire drink! I also added two drops of an antidote, that should be more than enough to counteract the poison!" he handed the man the glass.
"Uh.... no thanks..."
"AWW you wimp! Hey you! " He yelled at another man at the bar, " Try this drink! It's on the house!" and he handed the other man the drink.
"Oh ok!" Said the enthusiastically man who apparently had not been listening to swabblechops conversation with the other man. He then took a drink and started shaking," THAT IS SOOOOOOOOO GOOOOOOOD!!!!!!! GIVE ME MORE!!!!" Said the man who seemed to be spazzing out.
By this time swabblechops was drinking straight out of the bottle and drank the last drop," Oh sorry, I'm out of the most important ingrediant."
"Oh darn, that was really good," said the man a who was now twitching. He then walked out of the room. Later whispers could be heard about a man outside the door twitching on the ground, but no one seemed worried, he was breathing afterall.
"Soooo...." said the first man who was now watching what swabblechops put in all the drinks very carefully," Whats your name?"
" I am Swabblechops, the Less Powerful!" he said very excited, like his name was amazing.
".....Well swabblechops, i think you should lay of the poison, I think it's going to your head"

next: Chapter Two: Swabblechops the psychic bartender...?  

[Amaterasu3531]

Chapter 4: Swabblechops the Criminal Bartender...?

Swabblechops is being interegated in the police station, and he is already annoying the interegaters.

"Why am I here? Seriously, shouldn't you be convicting the murderer or something?"
"We have been informed that you knew about the murder before it happened, were you involved?"
"Haha, involved with who? The drunk guy who stupidly attacked a rank 8 demon with an axe?"
"Answer the question!"
"NO! Ask anyone who was there, that event was incredibly random. I don't even think those two knew each other!"
"Then how did you know it was going to happen?"
"Well those people were saying i was psychic. Apparently i know the future before it happens."
" There is no such thing as a psychic."
" ...tell that to Raymond Scarlet."
"Who?"
"The psychic destroying Moscow."
"?????"
"never mind..."
" So, if your a psychic, what am i thinking?" the other cop said.
" I never said I was psychic, i said the people said i was psychic."
"Then how can you see the future?"
"I can't"
"...you just said you did"
"No I said,' i know the future before it happens.' Seeing the future and knowing what it is can be completely different. In this case, it is."
"???"
" You won't be able to understand, so i won't explain."
" How about you enlighten us?"
" No."
" How about we lock you up for 20 years?"
" You wouldn't do that."
" We wouldn't?"
" Not since you won't get the chance. If you keep being mean you might be dead within the minute."
"IS THAT A THREAT?!"
"No, it's a warning"
"From what? Do you know something that is about to happen?"
"Yes"
Cop1 looks at cop2 ," I don't like this"
"Me neither,"Cop2 replied.
"What do we do?"
"If he could see the future he would be great on the police force."
"Yeah, thats a good idea. Lets ask him, and if he can't see the future we will lock him up for lieing to us!"
"Good idea!"
The two look at swabblechops again." How would you like to join the police force and help us fight crime before it happens!?! If you do we might forget this ever happened!"
"Uh, no thanks, but thanks for the offer. You'll forget this happened soon enough."
"??"
"Oh, it's time. GET DOWN!" swabblechops yelled, at that moment the polices' chair collapsed leaving them laying on the ground.
"What the he...." but before he could finish the wall behind them exploded into a million peaces with such force it flipped the table in front of swabblechops over his head and it hit the wall. The police also went flying to the wall, but the impact was much less since they had been on the ground at the time. Swabblechops remained in the same place, his chair hadn't moved an inch, almost looking a bit bored. Among the ashes of the wall, a shadowy figure stood wielding a scythe crackling with electricity......
"I've been looking for you a LONG time (insert my guys real name here)" said the figure.

Up next; Final Chapter: Swabblechops the insanely powerful bartender.  

[Amaterasu3531]

Final Chapter: Swabblechops the Insanely Powerful Bartender

The shadowy figure said," Your soul is very long over due. If I collect it I will be treated like a god among my kind."
"Oh great, another reaper shinigami...."swabblechops said with a sigh.
"Hehe, you sound relatively calm for a person who is about to die." The figure stepped into the light, it was the man from the bar who wouldn't drink the Cobra Venom.
"WAIT WAIT WAIT! Your the reaper shinigami? Why the hell did my story need a plot twist? It's totally pointless and random >.<"
"How about you make this easy for me and just give yourself up?"
"Ha, no way."
The shinigami appears behind swabblechops' chair with his scythe to his neck. "Game over" When the shinigami moves his arm away for a second to get the force needed to take off swabblechops' head, he kicks the chair out from under him backwards sending the shinigami and the chair flying toward the wall with a crash.
"A reaper shinigami can not collect a soul which it can not kill,"swabblechops said calmly.
The shinigami took a few steps forward and yelled," AHHHH! You will pay for that! I was planning on making your death painless and quick. Because of that i'm going to make it long, drawn out, and painful! I might even try some of your blood, to see what it tastes like... Maybe i will finish you by ripping out your heart!"
"Ha, while you were blabling, you must not have noticed the thousands of knives that are now dangling around you...."
"WHATTT!?!?" the shinigami says as he looks around realizing what he said was true.
"oh wait... they aren't dangling anymore," at that second all thousand knives fly toward the shinigami. Every single knife hit him in a different place and all pierced his skin.
The shinigami let out a howl of pain and with an energy blast forced all the knifes out of his skin, and they all disappeared when some started to come close to swabblechops."YOU WILL PAY FOR THAT!"
"Ha, i think not. I now deam weaponry necessary," a leather sheath appears at swabblechops' side. From it he draws a sword (in an epic way)... a ...wooden sword?
"WHAT?!? You think THAT wooden blade can defeat my scythe of electricity?!? You always were a fool!" The shinigami charges Swabblechops and swings his scythe extremely confidently. Swabblechops simply swings his wooden sword at the scythe... and breaks the celestial metal blade of the scythe. "WHAT!!!!!"
Then the wooden sword turns into an exact replica of the shingami's scythe. "Hmmmm, this is a nicely craft scythe. Strong, light, and electric! I guess it's time for me to get rid of this pest."
The shinigami, still in shock, stood there like a moron and stared at swabblechops in fear and amazement. Then chains rose from the ground and wrapped around his legs, and sent a powerful shock of electricity through his body and he dropped to the floor.
He twitches on the ground, and swabblechops walked up to him holding the scythe and says," You never stood a chance. Now i shall switch you with the substitution on the floor..."
"What!?!? HOW DID YOU KNOW ABOUT MY CLONE!?!" the shingami yells as the one on the floor disappears in dark waves of energy and the real on appears in it's place. " More will come! The other shinigami will kill you! Even if i have failed they will find you!"
"You still think your getting out of here don't you? You think you shinigami can not die. Well you are mistaken. I can think of 5 ways to kill a reaper shinigami... but it will only take one now won't it? Lucky for me shinigami never tell others about what they have found... so if you never return, none will ever know where i am. Goodbye fool."
"NO don't STOP! I can..." But before he could finish swabblechops sliced him open with his own scythe (way #1). Swabblechops then walked up to the unconcious police,made sure they were alive, and said," they will have concusions... they won't remember a thing." He then walked out of the building through the hole in the wall and mumbled something like," Stupid plot twist, wasting my time!" As he walked the scythe turned back into the wooden sword, he sheathed it, and it disappeared. He then disappeared with a breeze, leaving only leaves swirling in the wind.

Thank you for reading my story. It is now finished. I would enjoy your comments, so please post them here.