Quote:
So, something happened today that really upset me and i feel i need to make a blog post about. I'm sorry if this offends, but i just have to make a post because i am offended. I'm not trying to start a fight or HUGE debate, but trying to get my emotions out....
I found out that my sister went on a date with her husband last night to Red Robbin and had their 3 month old with them. When my sister was nursing my niece the manager came up and asked her to cover up. My brother in law said that it was their legal right to nurse in public, but the manager wouldn't listen, he said that he had a shirt in the back she could use. My sister said no, they would just leave. She told me that she wasn't "forced" to leave, but she felt if she didn't cover up that he would ask her to leave or even call the police or something. So they just left so they wouldn't cause a scene.
Why does this story upset me? Because i feel that every nursing mother has the right to nurse where and when they want and i don't feel that they should have to cover up. And you know what, the law in Washington State agrees.
The law states (emphasis mine):
"Breastfeeding in public is not considered indecent exposure.
Breastfeeding mothers are protected under state anti-discrimination law, and can breastfeed their children in public places such as restaurants, pools, theaters, government buildings, museums, libraries, busses, or parks. No one, including business owners or employees
can tell a mother to leave, go to the restroom, or cover the child.
If you choose to provide a space for breastfeeding, place signs prominently in your business but know it is the breastfeeding woman’s right to stay where she is. She does not have to use a designated area."
I have a problem with people who feel that a women nursing her child is trying to be provocative, or seductive or rude or whatever. She is only trying to feed her child. That is it. You know what, BREASTS were given to us so we could feed our children. Shocker huh but that is their real purpose. It is our society and lifestyles that has changed that perspective and made the breast into a sexual object.
Some good points from some wonderful articles back up very well what i'm trying to say (i know this is long, but bare with me, since they are GREAT points):
"So what is it about the breasts that makes North Americans so obsessed with them as sexual objects? In the course of history many different parts of the female body have been fetishes for men, for example ankles, necks, and tiny feet (in China), so why breast obsession in our age?
It seems to be linked to the fact breasts are viewed so strongly as sexual body parts, and not seen as baby feeders. In fact, Americans are about to forget the natural function of the breasts.
In the fall of 1993, one of the undergraduate students in my 'Women and Culture' course was totally flabbergasted to discover that the biological function of women's breasts was for feeding children. With obvious shock and disgust evident in her voice she asked, 'You mean women's breasts are like a cow's udder?' That a young woman could reach college without ever having even heard of women using their breasts to feed their children is a sad commentary on American culture.
Katherine Dettwyler as quoted in The Breastfeeding Action Committee of Edmonton (BACE) report about Breastfeeding at Municipal Pools in Canada
If we can see breasts as the wonderful means God created to feed and comfort babies, then the obsessions men have about them can disappear; and importantly, women don't have to obsessively worry about the size and shape of their breasts.
This obsession HURTS women and men in various ways that are not always obvious. For example, a woman may need to go braless because of her breast health's sake, which results in men ogling over her, making comments, and considering her only on a sexual level.
But why does the American society view breasts primarily as sexual objects and not as baby feeders? Carolyn Latteier voiced it out this way in Berman & Berman's TV program "All about breasts":
"Well, I think it is partly to do with the fact that we don't breastfeed very much. I mean, breastfeeding rates have improved, but most women don't breastfeed very much or very long or in public. So when we see a breast, we don't say, "Oh there are those magical milk-making things.""
Lack of Breastfeeding Leads to Breast Obession
http://www.007b.com/breast_obsession.php
"In North America and in many other westernized countries a woman's breasts are a taboo: they are supposed to be hidden. Exposing woman's breasts in public is considered shameful and inappropriate ("indecent exposure") even on beaches or while breastfeeding. In other words, breasts - or at least the n****e - are supposed to be covered at all times.
Parents tend to teach their children the same way, and many times children don't see a single naturally nude breast (apart from their own) while growing up. It is totally possible that a child grows up in North America and never sees a baby breastfeeding!
However, while exposing breasts in public is a “no-no”, children and young people often see breasts (although practically never the nipples) displayed in a sexually provocative fashion on television, on the Internet, and in magazines. Breasts are actually emphasized in the advertisements, which signals to our young people that breasts are a sexual object, and only beautiful when big and protruding.
However, we know that the larger breasts in the media is often just a fallacy, since the models and actors use push-up bras and breast enlargement to artificially enhance the way their breasts look like. Besides that, the photographs are always airbrushed to look just "right". Just think: if young girls continually see this propaganda without a balancing view of natural naked breasts, it is no wonder they also start seriously worrying about the size and shape of their own breasts even to the point of suicide!
And women do greatly worry about their breast size as proven by the huge amount of augmentation surgeries: according to American Society of Aesthetic Plastic Surgery, in 2006 383,336 women had a breast augmentation. The same year, cosmetic surgeries were up 446% from the year 1997.
While nearly all US women are worried or even obsessed about their breast size and shape, some men have definite obsessions with female breasts are a source of sexual fantasy / turn-on. For these men, it is not just a general appreciation of the female figure or the various body parts, but a fetish, an extreme fixation or obsession. They get sexually inspired by looking at pictures with cleavage, where breasts are enticingly almost visible, yet hidden. While these men probably realize that this is happening, and feel they enjoy it, they are nevertheless "bound" by this behavior.
The general breast taboo and the provocative visual images in the media greatly encourage men to view breasts as objects of sexual arousal and play. Men are actually being conditioned to see breasts as sexual - to them, breasts become almost like inanimate objects that automatically "click" their brains to the "turn-on" mode.
This "obsession" is to be distinguished from a general appreciation of breasts for what they are (source of nourishment). Boys who were breast-fed as babies have a deep-seated "built-in" appreciation for a woman's breasts due to the child-mother relationship. This is NOT sexual in nature, nor arousing, but merely an instinctive appreciation towards breasts deep in one's psyche (soul).
The media images are screwed up.
So who benefits from this total taboo of female breasts? That is not hard to answer: the pornographic industry can now earn good money by showing men bare breasts that they can not see elsewhere. And truly: if this taboo was any less, for example if topless sunbathing was widely accepted and practiced, everybody would know how female breasts looked like - and pornographic magazines would sell a whole lot less.
Of course breasts are a female body part, and there is nothing wrong in considering them beautiful as part of a woman's body. But let's let breasts be like legs, hips, neck, face, and all the other body parts of a female - not lis some almost inanimate objects that automatically "click" men's brains' to the "turn on" mode.
"Well, we do have a peculiar obsession with breasts in this culture. A lot of people think it's just the human nature to be fascinated with breasts but in many cultures, breasts aren't sexual at all. I interviewed a young anthropologist working with women in Mali, in a country in Africa where women go around with bare breasts. They're always feeding their babies. And when she told them that in our culture men are fascinated with breasts there was an instant of shock. The women burst out laughing. They laughed so hard, they fell on the floor. They said, "You mean, men act like babies?"
Carolyn Latteier, the author of Breasts, The Women's Perspective on an American Obsession, in a TV program "All about breasts"
Breast Taboo in the North American Culture
http://www.007b.com/breast_taboo.php
So what does all this mean? It means forcing women to cover up, to leave the room, to nurse in private is harming our society. If we as a society grew up seeing women every day breastfeeding their children, we would not see breasts as a sexual object and thereby wouldn't be so shocked and offended when we saw a women breastfeeding.
Some argue that women can easily cover up their child while nursing. Yes, *some* women can do this, but not all. Some babies will not tolerate being covered up, and will scream and tear the blanket off causing more of a scene then if the mother had just been discreetly nursing. Other women live in a climate that is too hot for a baby to be safely covered under a blanket for so long. And with all babies, having their face covered for so long with a blanket is not safe. Being covered means they are breathing old air which lowers their oxygen levels which can be dangerous for the baby. Very dangerous. So why should a mother put her child at such risk just to make someone else more comfortable? That is absurd!
If you don't agree with women breastfeeding in public, then by all means, look the other way. No one is forcing you to stare.
on a last note, here are some good articles and videos about breastfeeding in public:
Breastfeeding is Offensive!
http://www.cafemom.com/journals/read/1502195/PIOG_Breastfeeding_Offensive
Breastfeeding in Whose Public?
http://www.breastfeeding.com/reading_room/whose_public.html
Breastfeeding in Public is Legal
http://www.007b.com/breastfeeding_public.php
You need to cover up!
http://www.breastfeeding.com/advocacy/you_need_to_cover_up.html
Breastfeeding in Public-video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E_2v6a6ybaI
This should really be common sense
http://www.cafemom.com/group/416/forums/read/11419911/This_really_should_be_common_sense?ct=acm_charms
To Give the Breast is to Give Life: A Public Breastfeeding Broadcast in Puerto Rico
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=942FRjAJhxU&has_verified=1
*stepping off soap box*
