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well, the only way i can explain it is this: you might be a lesbian who is just attracted to personality more than physical appearances. see, i'm the same way, but i could never actually kiss a guy (it disgusts me for some reason.) however, if you're able to kiss him, it might be possible that you're bi. OR, there's also that debate about soul mates that states that they are meant for you, but not in a sexual way; purely for companionship, in which case you can love him as your greatest friend and yet still not be dating him because you don't love him like a partner.

basically, i would say love him like you do. it doesn't matter if it confuses you to be a declared lesbian because in the end, the actual defining lable isn't important; it's only who you are that matters, not what people call you.

sorry if that's not what you were looking for. it's the best answer i can logically deduce, though.