Are you an Apocalypse fan? A crazed loving fan of zombies? Well here's your chance to enjoy some good ol' time nonsense. Let me warn you that this story sure does put the perspective of abstinence to the extreme. One night standSymptoms The timetable below outlines the process of an infected human (give or take several hours, depending on the individual)
Hour 1: Pain and discoloration (brown-purple) of the infected area. Immediate clotting of the wound (provided the infection came from a wound)
Hour 5: Fever (99-103 degrees F), chills, slight dementia, vomiting, acute pain in the joints
Hour 8: Numbing of extremities and infected area, increased fever (103-106 degrees F), increased dementia, loss of muscular coordination
Hour 11: Paralysis in the lower body, overall numbness, slowed heart rate
Hour 16: Coma
Hour 20: Heart stoppage. Zero brain activity
Hour 23: Reanimation
The Zombie Survival Guide
Max Brooks
Feb. 14, 2099 A.D.
7:45 pm
Los Angeles, CaliforniaTonight is the night, thought Adam to himself happily,
the night I lose my virginity!Adam walked briskly back to his apartment with the flowers he had bought across the street with a slight skip in his step. He felt…alive today; somehow above anything and everything.
He had fretted over his appearance in his bathroom mirror for an hour. Combing his hair and re-combing it, then brushing his teeth five times. Making sure there were no creases on his clothes and that he did not have an unpleasant odor about him. All this trouble because he wanted everything to be perfect. Wanted it to be perfect.
He had spent even more countless hours convincing himself that he could sexually perform without a problem, and that his “equipment” was enough to satisfy. But now, all those worries he had had were slipping away because he knew, soon enough he would know what it feels like to be a god.
…
Adam made sure that everything was clean and tidy and was where it should be early in the morning. He checked if the dinner he had prepared earlier was good to go and that the wine was cool. He started counting everything off with his fingers.
Food. Check. Music. Check. Lights. Check. Bed. Check. Condom. Check. Appearance. Check. Myself…Check.As he was about to check everything once more the doorbell rang. The sound ricocheting off the walls many times before it reached his ears.
“Who is it?” Adam asked.
“It’s me,” The voice purred.
Adam’s hand reached deliberately for the doorknob and turned it slowly open. He tried very hardly to persuade himself that this was not a dream.
Standing outside in the hall stood Adam’s girlfriend, Liz. A chubby girl with short cropped hair, wearing an emerald dress that accented her every curve. Adam could not for the life of him tear his gaze away. Liz’s lips moved but he did not hear a sound coming out.
“What’s that?”
“I said, let’s do it.”
Adam brought his eyes to hers.
Her eyes look a bit feverish, Adam thought as he was roughly pushed inside.
Feb. 14, 2099 A.D.
11:31 pm
Los Angeles, CaliforniaHer touch intoxicated him. The feel of her skin aroused him. Energy exploded between them.
They writhed, groaned, moaned, growled and much, much more. Every part of Adam’s body felt as if it was on fire. The immense pleasure of it all caused him to continuously spout gibberish. He was on the verge of gushing his seed for the umpteenth time when his mind began to cloud.
His last thoughts before everything darkened was his amazement of it all.
Feb. 15, 2099 A.D.
4:25 pm
Los Angeles, California Adam moaned himself awake with a smile plastered on his face. Last night had been the night of all nights. He propped himself up from bed and swung his legs to the side of the bed. Standing up a bit shakily, he walked with his arms outstretched to be his eyes since his had not awakened fully to be of use yet. He turned the faucet on and cupped his hands, splashing the water on his face. His muscles ached a bit but he ignored it. That is when he felt the gut wrenching hunger for food. He stumbled back from the pain and headed his way to the refrigerator.
Must’ve used up every ounce of my energy last night, Adam thought.
His eyes still not fully working, he searched inside the refrigerator blindly with his hands. Once he felt his hand grab onto the large container he knew contained some left over beef roast he gave a small shout of victory. His stomach gave another vicious growl and he decided to do without a plate and pulled out a fork from the drawer. Adam stuffed the food down his throat when he realized that Liz might be hungry too. He walked back inside the bedroom to see her pacing around the room, moaning.
“…Um…you okay Liz?”
Adam gave a start. His voice sounded rough, deeper than it really was. He was still contemplating why when Liz pounced him to the floor.
“Whoa! Hey what are you do-“
Adam had to cover his face while she swiped at him.
“Hey! Chill honey! What’s wrong?”
Liz tried to take a bite out of his arm. Adam’s hand groped for something to protect him when his grip fell on the lamp. He brought it down on her head, shortly knocking her out, giving him enough time to rush out the room and close the door behind him. He slid down the door with his back against it, breathing heavily. He ran his hand through his hair.
What just happened?He turned to look outside his window when he caught his reflection. His eyes looked completely red except for his black pupils, and his skin was a pasty green. He took a closer look, to see what he was truly looking at.
My God…April 16, 2009 A.D.
10:57 am
Los Angeles, CaliforniaAdam had forgotten how long it has been since he realized he was a zombie. The city was mostly already overrun by them. Every day he was attacked by zombies and the few living humans left. He had tried countless of times to communicate with the other zombies but they just wanted to eat his brains. Yes, he had learned that they really do want your brains for some reason or another. He did not want to find out why. Now he just wandered from place to place. Not the kind of life he was expecting in the future. He had plans, dreams of becoming a teacher. He survived day to day from eating what he could get his hands on. Once, he even ate from human flesh that he had found left over from a couple of zombies. It did not taste that bad at all to him. A bit too salty for his taste though.
April 16, 2009 A.D.
9:09 pm
Los Angeles, CaliforniaAdam searched for an abandoned home he could sleep in for the night. Every now and then, he would have to search for a new home when the place became crowded with zombies. The windows were broken and the door smashed in but it would serve his purpose.
The floor was littered with broken object, which he paid no heed to. All he wanted at the moment was a soft comfortable bed he could sleep in. He headed up the stairs and was relieved to find a room with a bed. Adam lumbered towards it, glad to have a place for the night. He was about to lie down and close his eyes when he heard a noise downstairs. Very quickly, he sat up and strained his ears. He could hear someone or something walking up the stairs. Hastily, he hid behind the door. A figure walked into the same room Adam was hiding in. He could not tell if it was a human or a zombie but decided not to risk it. Trying to leave quietly the room before he was noticed, he was unable to see the glass on the floor. It gave a distinctive crunch and the figure spun around. Adam crouched down in the shadows.
“Who’s there? Show yourself!”
Damn oh damn! Is this the end?The figure stepped slowly to Adam.
“Stand up.”
He did.
“Who are you?”
Not surprising that she thinks I’m human. “Adam. I just came in for the night to sleep. If you want I could leave.”
It took a while before he noticed that every time she spoke it sounded like a growl. A deep voice but no mistaking it as a female’s voice.
“Are you a human?”, the voice asked.
A strange question, he thought.
“Um…I’m a zombie?”
April 16, 2099 A.D
11:16 pm
Los Angeles, CaliforniaHer name was Ema. Turned out she was like Adam. A zombie, though not entirely. She had chosen the same house he did to rest when she had heard him and thought it was a human creeping up on her to shoot her. She told him her story about how she was turned. And he told his, to the part where his girlfriend tried to kill him. They talked for hours nonstop until Adam realized that he liked her. He told her so and was delighted to find out she liked him too. Adam tried to gather the courage to hold her hand when she took his. Content, he continued the conversation. Seemed like being turned into a zombie was not bad after all. And if possible, he had found someone even better than Liz.
Adam was still talking when he noticed that Ema was not paying attention.
“Adam?”
“Hm?”
She turned to face him.
“Let’s do it.”
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