Welcome to Gaia! ::

I was up late, and had the pleasure of stumbling on a documentary called, "The Diary of a Tired Black Man". It discussed the issues of black men trying to pursue black relationships with black women.

Being a black woman myself I understand what they are talking about, but does it really have to be this way? I think a lot of the issues circulate around the definition of "man". What exactly makes a boy a man? We all the the biological point, but what about the maturity, mentality, or in a relationship?

Many of the men said that black women are just confused about what they want, and that we just do not know what we want. In some degree I actually understand the things they were saying, but it just seemed like there was no justification.

The thoughts of what makes a female a woman, and what makes a male a man has been pressured by many other things than just the opposite sex. I think that it has been shaped by society itself. The way we are portrayed in media, music, stereotypes, even our own houses and yet we decided to keep it alive.

I even think that this issue may even branch out from just the black society to just a human society. I think in all of humanity no one could quite define what a man is, or what a woman is. What qualities they should posses, what they are to accomplish.

So I ask you all, what do you feel may be the definition of a man and a woman and what may contribute to the issues that blacks and the world face when it comes to issues of gender.

True. It seems when it ever comes an issue of gender is in America.

Some countries in the Middle East have roles that each sex are suppose to fall into as defined by their religion which I think makes it easier for them. But America is still finding its way to define exactly what America is. And that may be its definition that America is undefinable and the it is up to the individual to shape the definition on their own accord.

I specifically liked the part where he checked them broads on trying to label themselves "strong black women" and deeming him incapable of "handling" one which is why he went out with a white girl.

It's one of the most ridiculous myths that black women have come up with that their tendency towards combativeness with black men is indicative of "strength."

I'm still trying to figure out what a "strong black woman" is. Because in my mind.. when "strong" is used as a character trait to define someone I think of mental strength. Not "A woman who won't take no mess. A woman who won't put up with a man's bullshit."

What mess? What bullshit?

I don't think is or should be a definite definition on being a man or woman. I think its something you kinda define by yourself. At least that is what I try to do.

I liked the part about females and talking to their fiends. I hate that. It is the most aggravating experience ever.

Hmm. I should go back to that thread. 3nodding Anyway this what I posted in my journal since you beat me to the punch. Probably a good thing anyway. Seems like the folks in the forums give you more breathing room. People see my username and go into attack mode. rolleyes