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[Q] Troilus, Cavalier of the Desert Island, CRIT

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iStoleYurVamps

iStoleYurVamps


Trash Husband

PostPosted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 6:38 pm


Troilus, Cavalier of the Desert Island

Is not a Troll

But enjoys David Bowie
PostPosted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 6:45 pm


Name: Dorian Mill

Age: 19

Birthday: March 19th

Sign: Picses

Blood Type: B-

Fav. Food: Jicama

Hated Food: Coconuts

School: Graduate, Not in school. School is for people who have life plans

Hobbies:

Tetris- It's been proven to calm the mind and help focus. It's also a game that Dorian can play on for hours. He likes the techno music. He also owns a tetris shirt. And a tetris themed bookbag. And a pen that lets you play tetris, (which sits in the teacher's desk).
Mystery Novels- The ones with broken spines and cost $1 at the dollar tree are the best. Dorian loks reading about the PI who goes against the grain. (He is also a fan of Film Noir)
Gardening- He grows herbs. Special herbs. Legal ones. Ones he can use when he's too poor to go shopping.
Watson and Holmes: His pet rats. Holmes is female. This was due to a mistake on the seller's part. Dorian likes to take his pet rats on walks in his hoodie, and this is not allowed in food stores and depresses Dorian considerably.


Gemstone:


Virtues:

Self-Sufficient- After graduating, Dorian left home and started working full time at the grocery shop downtown. He doesn't depend on his parents now, and vows to never depend on anyone. Why? To many problems. Dorian thinks by doing stuff on his own, he's a better person.
Never back down- You have a problem? He will ask you, up front, and he will deal with it. He's not blunt in sense he asks at the worst possible moment, but he does ask. He does confront, just in the shadows where they won't make a scene.
Motivated- Dorian has one life goal besides living until he's 30. And that is be successful. He still gets up and does his full on work day. He still does what he has to do. He will live, he will survive. Even if the sky is a black cloud he will move on, because he can't give up. It's just not his nature to do so.
Positive Thinker- When things get tough the thought get going and Dorian is going to not only go, he will go smiling. He tries to find the silver lining on every storm cloud. When he can't find one, he will find something else to be positive about. Out of everything he does, he truely thinks that if you are alive there is hope, that in some way, things can always get better.

Flaws:

Overly critical- Living on his own and being self reliant has made Dorian very critical of other lifestyles, mostly of his peers. He can't understand why people need to rely so heavily on each other, and also, why they are so darn whiny~ So you lost your money? Make more. This also goes into cleanliness, organization, and tends to go with...
Prideful- He has a full time job. He has his own place. He has a (very old and half dead) car. Dorian is better then you. He will tell you why. He might tell you how to get as good and him but as stands, he is still better then you.
Jealous- Dorian, for all his pride, all his self reliance, hates feeling lesser and that he is somehow left out. He might SAY he is better then you for earning his car ALL ON HIS OWN, but inside, he REALLY HATES THE FACT YOU GOT THAT BRAND NEW TOYOTA FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY. But he won't share this. He'll just make grumpy faces at your new car and say his is better because it's HIS.
Lonely- Always moving forward and making the best of things while not wallowing in the past has one draw back Dorian keeps encountering. The fact that for all his independence and bravado, he is terribly lonely. He has friends and family, but he always keeps them at arm's length. While he says it's a good thing, something needed to achieve his goals, he is rather lonely and often finds himself at home on a Saturday night with no one around. Part of him desperately wants to find someone to be close to, but he can never bring them closer then that brick wall he puts up around himself. The closest he got was a girlfriend in High school, but she left him, even saying that he never really managed to open up.


PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION

Eyes: Red

Hair: Burnt Red, Long and straight normally/casually, tied in a bun when working. He plans to donate it at a latter date...like never.

Face: ref to come? (LOL VAUGE)
lulz I will draw a ref sometime for his features I swear.


iStoleYurVamps

iStoleYurVamps


Trash Husband



iStoleYurVamps

iStoleYurVamps


Trash Husband

PostPosted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 7:08 pm


Challenge: Get Lost.
(CAN I GET A RIM-SHOT?) Or Possible: Loneliness is just the beginning.
IDK.

Weapon: Standard Cavalier rapier. 'Surrender'

When bonded to a Black Moon partnered senshi, the blade's wounds leave a sense of hopelessness and sorrow. The feeling that they are alone in battle is the most common feeling. This feeling gradually saps the will to fight, and in turn allows an easier fight for Troilus
((UNLESS MODS ARE LIKE 'SUP DAWG WE HAD POWER PICKED OUT'))

Eye Color: Deep sea green (???)

Name: ???

Hobbies:
Carving: I whittled this bird.

It has one wing because it fell out of the nest at a young age.

Cooking: He once made soup on the battle field. It had an eyeball in it. It tasted great until the eye ball showed up. (He likes to cook experimental foods with whatever he can find. And he means WHATEVER he can find.)


Virtues:

A jack of all trades, master of none- With skills ranging from tracking, mending, cooking, armor upkeep, bare fisted combat, and other battle related skills, Troilus prides himself on his ability to do whatever is asked of him. Sadly, being a jack of all trades does have a tiny flaw that irks him to no end, and that is the fact that he really is a master of nothing. (Others might comment that when it comes to women he's also poorly oblivious but he claims that he's rather unattractive so there is no way anyone like him in such a sense)
Devoted- What will it take to win? If it means throwing you under the bus, he will do so, (provided it is for the prince, and he's not throwing like, the captain Hector under the bus). He is willing to do what is asked for him, even the stuff that is really questionable. He will do it all, just for his prince. His prince is his hope, and well...Troilus tends to think along the lines of 'religious zealot' when the prince and the people of black earth get involved. It's his job to protect them, defend them. It's a job he has sworn his life too. His life is meaningless in the face of the lives of those is sworn to protect.



Flaws:

Self Reliant- Also known as 'does not play well with others' in the sense that you stick him on a team, he will not wait up for them. He wants to be effective and asks that no one wait up for him. He CAN work in a team, so long as that team understands he does not like having to be held back or accidentally holding others back. He depends first and foremost on himself. In battle you can't afford to depend on others should things go awry.*
Ruthless- In his devotion, comes a cost, and that is his ability to do ANYTHING asked of him. He is quite literally blind to the moral standards that a normal person would go 'Uhhhhhh'. If someone told him to kill a family of innocent people in order to save the crown, he would not hesitate, the choice would be clear (to him). He firmly thinks the suffering of one can spare a thousand. (He's the type to think that 'Those who walk away from Omelas are cowards).
Oblivious- Troilus has about the emotional gauge of a broom. He understands that his duty is to the Black Earth and it's royal family. That the sun rises and sets each day. He does NOT understand the latest fashion trends. He does not understand why he was told to go ask that girl to dinner, (is she some kind of spy?). He also doesn't get jokes, pranks, or any reference to anything. Really. <:C He is so confused as to why the rest of the cavs are laughing at him. He was just slapped for going to that girl and telling her that she should join him in his tent later on! Why did the prince order him to do that? It was because she is a spy right? Does he need to go 'take care' of her? No? You guys why are you laughing? D:>?

*Again, this is not to say he is not a team player. He can work in a team, but if it came down to saving a team member versus killing the enemy he would kill the enemy. He is the type to not book excuses. Not even for himself.
PostPosted: Mon May 17, 2010 12:03 pm


SO, SOMEONE SHOULD CHEW THIS OUT
LIKE A BAWWS


iStoleYurVamps

iStoleYurVamps


Trash Husband


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PostPosted: Sun May 30, 2010 2:22 pm


General The Jimaca sound very interesting, I had to actually look it up though to see what it was. You may want to throw a tidbit link in somewhere? (This is just mainly a suggestion)

I like the whole school is for people who have life plans, but isn’t there something that he’d like to do eventually? Any sort of dream at all? Does he work anywhere? If so where?

Also just a random suggestion as far as profiles, this is just a ‘readability’ thing you may want to consider putting spaces in between hobby, virtue, and flaws. It just makes seeing where one thing starts and the other ends. Again it’s just a random suggestion, nothing you actually have to take.

Oh did you forget to find his gemstone?

Dorian
Hobbies All Dorian’s hobbies sound like they’re solo hobbies. Tetris, I believe is a solo game, are there any clubs he’s in that includes his hobbies? Gamers club, book club, Gardening club? What does he do with other people? How does he interact with others? I mean I understand he’s suppose to be lonely but isn’t there at least one thing he’ll do with people?

Other than that I love his rats. X3 Specially that Holmes is female.

Virtues
Positive thinker has a spelling mistake, thought I think is suppose to be tough. Also Self Sufficient and Never back down, seem to be lacking a little bit, mainly in the how it helps him department. How does being self-sufficient help him besides not having to depend on anyone? Are there any other ways it helps him? Same with Never Back down, how does that help him? Besides confronting other people’s problems, does he not back down at his own problems?

Flaws
On overly critical it seems like you left off and forgot to finish, and left us hanging. Does he often tell people what he thinks of them having to rely on other people? What makes this flaw? Right now this seems a bit… on the fence, not really a flaw but not really a virtue. (But that might just be me?)

On prideful just a curiosity thing here, when he’s telling you why does he make a point to rub this in the person’s face that he’s talking to? Is that what makes this a flaw?

Troilus
Hobbies Why did Troilus pick up carving? Cooking? Is there something he likes to do with his team?

Virtues
How is jack of all trades a virtue? It sounds more like a flaw than a virtue to me honestly. Perhaps find something that makes it a good thing? You start off with it sounding like a decent virtue but then you throw in the flaw bits of it and it just kind of ends up being all a flaw.

Again with Devoted, I think also is a bit closer to a flaw than a virtue. Though I think this one is more on the fence than the other virtue. Perhaps you can reword it so it says how being devoted to his team helps him as well is good for the team. Right now you’ve left me to wondering he throws any of his team sans Alex and Hector under the bus. Would Aeneas be thrown under the bus to, why does he throw them under the bus? Does he do it to make himself look good? I hope what I’m trying to say here makes sense.

Flaws
Self Reliant is an interesting flaw. On Ruthless, the only thing I’m really confused about is the Omelas bit. I tried to read most of it and I just kinda went Huh? I’m guessing they walked away from something?

With the Oblivious flaw it makes me feel bad for Troilus. D= Poor Troilus

----

That's about all I saw this time around. Hope it helps~
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