Welcome to Gaia! ::

Hello...//

This is FallenSiren's questing thread for her own Plague!
The Keeper is named Seymour Luikart and the Plague is named Clance.
Critique and suggestions are welcome and very much appreciated!

The Plague ... Silver Kiseru//



XXXName of Plague//
XXXXXXXXClance

XXXGender//
XXXXXXXXMale

XXXItem History//
XXXThis pipe was a gift from Seymour's grandmother to his grandfather back when the two first gotten married. It had been their first anniversary gift and the old man had been using it since. The kiseru -in appearance- is just like any ordinary kiseru, the beginning and end of the pipe are made of silver while the body is made from a piece of bamboo. By looking at the healthy shine of the silver, anyone can see the care and love the old man bares for the pipe.

XXXAfter the Seymour's grandfather died, the pipe started to release black smoke. To Seymour's surprised, it continues to do this day in and day out. The man had tried many times in putting the smoke out, but how do you stop when you can't find the cause? The kiseru continues to sit on its stand above the fire place, releasing a small trail of black smoke above it.

XXXPersoanlity//
XXXClance's personality changes between being an excito and an anhelo.

XXXAs an excito, Clance is hyperactive. He acts like a boy who's running on caffeine, and since he's new to the world, he's also very curious of his surroundings. The plague wants to interact with others, he wants to learn, and he wants to explore. Clance’s speech at the time will be quick and very blunt (he will not know how to filter before speaking his mind). He does not realize he worries Seymour when he's not within the keeper's sight, and he is pretty much a child.

XXXHowever, as Clance grows, the plague will grow out of his hyperactivity. He will begin to understand his keeper a bit more over time, and stop worrying the man as much. The Plague will also become very observant as it helps him figure out how Seymour is feeling (the keeper only does certain actions when he's anxious, etc). Clance will not lose his love of meeting others and exploring, but while exploring, he will remember to tell his keeper or to keep within Seymour's sight. Clance will pick up his smoking habit as an anhelo(he will not be smoking as an excito, he's too small).

XXXI got most of my ideas for Clance's excito stage from children in general, and what I think my first impression of smoking would feel like (I'm allergic to smoke). And then Clance's Anhelo stage is more related to smoking and him learning though experiences.

XXXHobbies//
XXXSmoking. It's just something Clance would do. He is a kiseru after all!

XXXLikes//
XXXThe scent of smoke (it doesn't matter rather the smoke came from a burning house or a lite cigar, as long as it's smoke, it's good).

XXXDislikes//
XXXCooking. Clance fails at cooking and no matter how many times he tries, any cuisine he attempts to make gets burnt one way or another.

XXXConcept Ideas//
XXX✖ Clance holding a cigarette as an anhelo.

Updates...//

DD/MM/YY...UPDATE

24/09/10...Didn't get Clance, but Seymour got accepted as a citizen. Need to work on Clance again (rewriting his entire personality).

25/04/10...Rewrote Seymour's personality,added more to Clance's personality, added in a 'Hobby', 'Likes' and 'Dislike' category, thought more on the quirks the two might have, needs to add in more for Seymour's history, got Seymour's picture uploaded.

27/04/10...Got Snoof's critique (THANK YOU :'D), threw out Seymour's design from the 25th and am currently rewriting the entire profile, edited a small portion of Clance's profile.

28/04/10...Finally finished rewriting Seymour's history, Clance's Alignment is still on debate, need someone to critique Seymour's profile

I'll be honest, Seymour seems... very weak for Shyregoed; it's a torrential place, where one has to kill to earn one's keep, especially if they're not stationed in a religious building or stationed at one of the bases. If he's living on his own, he'll need to chop his own wood, kill his own food, all of those things, so how can he do it if he freaks out so badly at the slightest provocation?

Just as well, there's a lot of "he does this, but doesn't know why" floating around; it would probably be good to flesh that out. If he has an assumption about anything, such as why he's so thin or why he doesn't like smoke, then that's one thing but a reason still needs to be provided, whether he knows the true reason or not. The smoke relating to his parents dying in a fire seems pretty obvious. The fact that Seymour seems to even know what a metabolism is, probably isn't. The setting is VERY medieval, and science is only just starting to have a real place in the world, so things like metabolisms and immune systems and such? Totally new to people and I doubt the vast majority even know what they're called, let alone how they function. I understand he's a scholar, but again, Shyregoed's a really rough place to be and personal libraries and such, even professional libraries, are pretty sparse.

I'd like to understand more about Seymour's "freak outs" as well; how does he act during them, what would be the modern clinical name for such a reaction in him, anything and everything you can possibly give. As much information as possible is what we like!

The fact that he's thin worries me about; I mean, not every person who lives in Shyregoed is going to be built like a viking, but again, he's probably got to do his own menial labor and do more than sit on his butt and read all day, so why doesn't he seem to have any muscle mass or anything? He could just have a swimmer's/athletic build but he can't be skin and bones, he'd die in a matter of days.

And truly, while I LOVE the idea of a Kiseru and understand Seymour's devotion to his grandfather, if he hates smoke so much, why would he bother keeping the kiseru around to begin with? Surely there is something else of his grandfather's that he could have held onto and not freaked out about. I think this might be a case of awesome Plague, ill fitting guardian; I DON'T mean to throw Seymour out, but I think he could use some work, especially in terms of fleshing out. More specifically, I wonder if he should live somewhere other than Shyregoed, 'cause it's super easy to get lost and die.

As far as Clance goes, I don't really see any issues. The way he likes laying with the blanket is a funny and cute quirk, and who doesn't like incense? Though the fact that he cares about his guardian but constantly makes him freak out by smoking/blowing smoke in his face is very contradicting. Do you have any ideas of what alignment you might want for him?

If you're hoping for him to live in a place with snow, maybe he can live very close to the edge of Shyregoed but still in Helios limits? I'm sure snow pours in from the above region, but Helios seems to be more his style :B

The only current Locos, Adal, is an immense asshat xD He's really meeaaaan, so it'd be weird to see a trend of that... Mmm -thinks-

I'd say Infi's are the most common, but they can still be quite, quite diverse. We need more of ANY alignment, though, so I guess it doesn't matter which direction you go, but Quietus and Locos are pretty dang rare compared to the Infitialis, if that helps any.