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 Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 2:14 pm
Aleu crawled out from her den early, far too early actually, the sun had only just begun to rise over the horizon. Sure, she liked the mornings normally, the birds always sang songs to lift her spirit and give her inspiration but today their songs did nothing for her. She had struggled to sleep all night and it seemed when she finally did manage to begin to drift off her thoughts turned to something she wished to avoid.
Letting out a sigh Aleu set off towards the river. Padding through the forest she did her best to focus on everything around her, not because one should be alert at all times, no, it was to keep her mind off of - him. Once she reached the river Aleu took a long drink before sitting down, staring off into the trees along the other side of the river. While she hummed a bit of a song she found that the flow just wasn't what it normally was, it was broken not smooth and rhythmical.
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Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 4:30 pm
 Chivosi had not been much of an early riser before, before having children, before starting the pack, before Mene's disappearance and subsequent return. But now? Well now it seemed as though she couldn't sleep in for the life of her. It was unusual however that anyone else other then perhaps Ovian with his odd sleeping schedule was up and moving around at this strange hour of day and so when Aleu emerged and made her way to the river, Chiv followed.
Settling down beside her daughter she eyed her for a few moments "Is something troubling you?" She asked, Aleu always so chipper and happy seemed...of even her song sounded off beat.
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Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 4:41 pm
Though Aleu was well aware of her mothers approach her words made her jump a little. With her humming brought to a stop Aleu looked over at her mother. "I couldn't sleep, that's all." Or at least that's all she was willing to admit at this very moment. There were several things on Aleu's mind but the one subject that was bothering her the most was the one that she wished to not talk about at all. She knew her mother would understand if she explained it to her, but Aleu for the life of her just did not want to speak of those things.
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 9:44 am
"mmm" Chivosi made the noncommittal noise as Aleu tried to explain away her early wake-up "Often times when I can't sleep I find it is because my mind won't stop thinking about something" She commented lightly as she smoothed some ruffled fur along her daughters leg. "It just keeps spinning around and around until I figure out the problem, or come to terms with the thought...or tell someone about it' She continued absently, as though making off handed remarks and not at all giving advice though she clearly was.
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 10:08 am
Aleu sat quietly for a few moments thinking over her mothers words. They made sense, but at the same time it was hard to Aleu to accept them. "But what if the thing you think is a problem isn't a problem at all?" She asked, though she knew a few more details would have been more helpful to the situation. Though adding more details meant admitting things she wasn't sure she was ready to do.
Glancing over at her mother she let out a small sigh. "What happens if you come to terms with this 'problem' that has kept you from sleeping but doing so creates more of a problem than what you started off with?"
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 10:27 am
Chivosi glanced over at her daughter for a few moments, it was clear she as struggling with some internal dilemma, and knowing the mind of young wolves it could be any number of things - Chiv feared for a few moments that Aleu was thinking of leaving, of looking for a pack or a family of her own, she was getting to that age, the age when young wolves sometimes dispersed to find their own way in the world..but there hadn't been any signs of that. Not yet anyways.
"It sounds like your not sure if you like the answer your mind has already given you to this problem that is not a problem" Chivosi answered after a few minutes. "And thats why its causing a larger problem for you, sometimes admitting something to yourself is hard, but its certainly better then running from it forever"
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 10:35 am
"My mind hasn't given me an answer, it's given me two, and neither of them are all that great." Aleu wished she could just say what it was that was bothering her. But she felt embarrassed by it, even though she knew her mother would understand. It was more an issue with conflicting thoughts than anything, how could an enemy be a friend as well - or perhaps more than a friend. Glancing back at the river for a few moments before returning her gaze to her mother. "Is life always this complicated?"
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 10:49 am
"I see" Chivosi responded in thought "Well that is quite a problem now is't it?" Chivosi commented agreeably, though she wanted to tell Aleu to just speak with her about the problem she didn't want to push her away with too much pressure. She was starting to get a bit worried however - Aleu was always such a nice happy wolf - it was hard to see her worried about something.
"Oh sometimes" she told her truthfully "But is generally worth dealing with the complicated parts if it means you get the happy parts later" She concluded with a warm look.
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 12:18 pm
Once again Aleu considered her mothers words carefully. Though she knew that she was being foolish worrying over such things, but this was the first time she encountered this problem and hoped that it would be the last. Not because she wanted to admit things and just go with it, no she just didn't want to be so confused again. However, ever since Raiden came home and started acting weird Aleu began to realize that the perfect world she lived in wasn't so perfect after all.
Paws shifted slightly as she thought. She should just tell her mother what it was and get it over with, but that was proving harder to do that she had thought. "I don't plan on leaving." She stated, almost as though she knew that her mother was thinking that's what the issue was. Eyes moved to look at Chiv. "I don't ever want to leave this place." Okay she would ask an honest question now. "How do you know when you have found what you are looking for or want? And if your mind is telling you its the right thing, how can you be certain that will make you happy?"
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 12:44 pm
Chiv chuffed at her daughter as thought the thought of her leaving had never crossed her mind - though she couldn't help but breath out a sigh of relief. Chivosi wouldn't stop any of her children from leaving if thats what they wished to do with their lives...but she would be more then sad to see them go. Especially lately - what with Mene in a slump and two of her children acting strange and anti-social.
"Well you don't dear" She answered Aleu truthfully "But if you never listen or try to follow what your mind is suggesting then you will never know if you could have been happy. You can always backtrack love..but you can't always re-find opportunities once they've passed you by"
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 12:54 pm
You can always backtrack on love - those words rang through Aleu's mind much clearer than all the others that her mother said. Perhaps Chiv had picked up on her daughters extremely vague questions to the source of the problem, or it could have just been one of those random answers that applied to just about any problem in the world. Either way it was good to know this. That way, she could always change her path if she choose to do what her mind was telling her to do.
Her maw opened in a smile just a bit. Perhaps that was just what she had needed to hear all along, that even if things turn out not like you had expected them to it's better to try them and find out than miss out on them completely. "Thanks, that helps me a lot. Now I know not to let things pass me by without giving them a try first." Though she had to admit she was still frightened of the idea of trying out what her mind was telling her to do. "How is father doing?" She asked knowing that so far Mene had not returned to his previous self, even though Aleu had barely known him as a pup.
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 1:03 pm
Chiv chuckled slightly at her daughter "Your welcome - its good to know I come up with some decent advice once in a while" She told her in an amused tone. Youth - you'd think they would learn to just ask their elders to begin with and spare themselves all of this stress to begin with. But of course then they might not ever learn anything.
Her paws shifted slightly as Aleu changed topics, her brow furrowing slightly in thought "I'm not sure,he is getting healthier...but he's no the same wolf who left when you were young, not the same wolf I started this pack with..." Chivosi told her daughter with a slight sigh, she still loved Mene that couldn't be questioned but the change worried at her. "He has changed in much the same way your siblings have" She concluded "And I don't think theres anything we can do to help them return from this dark path, perhaps time will be the only cure"
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 1:09 pm
Aleu gave her mother a big smile. "You always have good advice, I just don't always ask for it." Some days she wished she looked to her mother for advice more often than she did, yet her somewhat independent nature usually kept her from doing so.
The answer about her father, and her siblings, was pretty much what Aleu had expected. They had all changed so much, yet none of them had said what had happened to cause this. Raiden had barely spoke with her since he came back and yelled at her and Derecho, and Tempest - well Aleu hadn't really spoken with her either, she seemed so overly distant. But in the back of her head the question burned, what if that even with time they didn't recover? Then what would become of them, of the pack? "Did he ever say what happened?" It was a question she didn't really want to ask, but it slipped out before she could stop herself.
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 1:16 pm
Chivosi shook her head slightly with a sigh "No...he hasn't spoken of it with me yet, if he ever does. Your father was a very happy carefree wolf when we first met you, I was traveling with Merrill at the time and I think we nearly drove her mad with our hijinks for a while...until we decided to start this pack, a place for wanders and wolves without a home like we had been to find safety, even if it was just for a short while." She gave Aleu a warm look, she didn't want her daughter growing up to think her father had always been so distant and miserable looking.
"He seemed happy at first, but as the pack grew he started to stress. When you guys were born he was rejuvenated - more himself again and I thought perhaps he would be fine, but then he left to scout more land and well..you've seen him on his return."
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 1:23 pm
It saddened Aleu that a once vibrant wolf like her father had been reduced to what he was now, and for an unknown reason as well. But like her mother said, that could change in time and he would either return to his happy ways, or stay down this dark path. Either way, Aleu knew she had the rest of her family, and pack, to care for and that made the sadness lessen.
Speaking of the others, Aley glanced upwards at the sun that was now sitting near the tops of the trees. My they had been here for quite some time. She needed to go find Lyra and do some serious thinking - and perhaps seize an opportunity or two as well. "Everything will work out, I just know it will." She gave her mother a gentle bump with her shoulder before standing and giving her fur a shake. "Thanks for all the advice, I really think it will help." Turning she began to slowly walk away, but turned her head to look back at her mother. "I love you mom." And then padded off in search of Lyra.
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